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>>> WELCOME TO "RED EYE."
IT IS LIKE WHAT'S HAPPENING IF
BY HAPPENING YOU MEAN
SCREAMING IN MY ATTIC.
LET'S GO TO TV'S ANDY LEVY FOR
A PRE GAME REPORT.
WHAT IS COMING UP ON TONIGHT'S
SHOW?
>> THANKS, GREG.
COMING UP ON THE BIG SHOW,
WHAT MAKES WHITE HOUSE KAHN
SILL AN IMPORTANT PART OF THE
INNER CIRCLE?
IT HAS TO BE THE SHOES.
OLDER VIEWERS WILL GET THAT
REFERENCE.
AND WEEK TWO WITHOUT A STORY
IN OUR RUN DOWN ABOUT 3-D
PRINTERS BEING USED AT FOOD
REPLICATORS TO FEED THE
HUNGRY?
WILL WE GET TO IT STICK
AROUND.
AND WILL REESE WITHERSPOON
PLAY AMERICA'S FORMER FIST
LADY?
SOME SAY YES, BUT AMERICA'S
NEWEST SWEETHEART, IE THIS
GUY, SAYS NO.
GREG?
>> THANKS, ANDY.
HOW WAS MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND?
>> GREAT.
>> YOU DIDN'T LEAVE YOUR
APARTMENT, DID YOU?
>> NOPE.
>> GOD BLESS YOU.
LET'S WELCOME OUR GUESTS.
WELL, SHE IS SO HOT THAT
PARENTS OF STOVES TELL THEIR
CHILDREN NOT TO TOUCH HER.
I AM HERE WITH KIMBERLY GILFO
AND A GUEST ON "THE FIVE."
I TALK TO HER FROM TIME TO
TIME.
AND IF COMEDIC ABILITY WAS A
ROLLER COASTER I WOULD RIDE
HIM UNTIL I THREW UP, JOE
DEVITO.
NOT THE *** HIP --
HIPNOTIST EVEN IN BOSTON.
SHE KNOWN AS BAIT, IT IS BILL
SCHULZ.
SERIOUSLY, DUDE.
REALLY?
OH MY GOODNESS.
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?
>> I AM EATING A PIECE OF BEEF
JERKEY.
>> LOOK AT THAT.
>> HE WOULD EAT YOU.
>> MOVING ON.
HE KNOWS DC LIKE I KNOW VD.
I AM TALKING OBVIOUSLY ABOUT
MY GOOD FRIEND VIN DIESEL.
NEXT TO ME "REASON MAGAZINE"
MATT WELCH.
>> A BLOCK.
THE LEDE.
THAT'S THE FIRST STORY.
THANKS AGAIN FOR DINNER,
GREG.
HOW DID YOU KNOW I LOVE
SALMON?
>> SHUT THE HELL UP.
HER SHOES MAKE NEWS.
WELL, THEY CHOSE BUNIONS OVER
BENGHAZI.
THE WASHINGTON POST REPORTS
THAT WHITE HOUSE CHIEF COUNCIL
KATHERINE RUM BLEAR IS KNOWN
IN THE WEST WING FOR HER
FABULOUS FOOTWEAR AND ALSO HER
TASTE FOR HUMAN FLESH.
NOT REALLY, BUT YOU BELIEVE
ME.
SHE FIRST DREW ATTENTION FOR
HER HOT HEELS AS A JUSTICE
DEPARTMENT PROSECUTOR IN 2006
PROMPTING ONE LEGAL AFFAIRS
BLOG TO AT THE TIME CALL HER A
STAR LITIGATRIX.
DON'T YOU HATE WHEN THEY ADD
TRIX TO STUFF?
I HATE IT AND THAT'S WHY WE
ARE DHOG STORY.
DOING THIS STORY.
THE POST REVEALS, QUOTE, ONE
OF HER PAIRS HAS A JEWELED
PACELY PATTERN.
ANOTHER IS BLACK AND STRAPY.
QUICK SIDEBAR.
SHE KNEW FOR DAYS OR WEEKS
ABOUT THE IRS TARGETING TEA
PARTY GROUPS AND DIDN'T TELL
PRESIDENT OBAMA.
TELL ME MORE ABOUT THOSE
STUPID SHOES.
KIMBERLY PREFERS SOMETHING
MORE COMFORTABLE AT HOME.
SHE STRAPS TWO OF THESE ON HER
FEET.
WHO KNEW BILL HAD A LITTLE
BROTHER?
I ACTUALLY DID.
KIMBERLY, I HAVE TO GO TO YOU
BECAUSE YOU ARE THE HUMAN
CENTI CENTI -- CREE NTIPEDE OF
SHOES.
>> YES, AND I WILL RUMBLE IN
THE JUNGLE.
SHE IS TRYING TO GET AFTER MY
SHOES.
I HAVE THE LOUIS VUITTONS ON
FOR THIS SEGMENT.
HIT ME.
>> WHY DO YOU THINK THEY WANT
TO FOCUS ON HER SHOES?
IS IT BECAUSE THEY DON'T WANT
TO FOCUS ON SCANDALS OR
BECAUSE THEY ARE SEXIST AND
ONLY THINKS ABOUT WHAT WOMEN
PUT ON THEIR FEET?
>> THEY ARE FABULOUS.
WHY FOCUS ON REAL SCANDALS,
NEWSWORTHY EVENTS WHEN YOU CAN
DO SOMETHING FRIVOLOUS LIKE
SHOES?
I FIND THE STORY MORE
INTERESTING BECAUSE IT HAS THE
MENTION OF HER SHOES.
PEOPLE HAVE DONE THAT ABOUT
ME, RIGHT?
>> AT "RED EYE" WE DON'T TRY
TO USE A WOMAN'S SEXUALITY
WHEN WE ARE DOING --
>> LIKE A LEG CHAIR OR
SOMETHING SO DEMEANING AND
DISGUSTING?
>> EXACTLY.
CAN THE WASHINGTON POST DO A
STORY LIKE THIS WITHOUT
SECRETLY DYING INSIDE?
CAN YOU ACTUALLY HEAR THEIR
SOUL SCRUNCH UP?
>> THIS A TRIED AND TRUE THING
CALLED THE SOURCE GREASER,
RIGHT?
IT IS THE TERM OF ART IN
JOURNALISM THAT YOU GREASE UP
THE SOURCE BY WRITING A
DARLING LITTLE STORY.
THEY HAD ONE IN THE WASHINGTON
POST LAST WEEK ABOUT JAY
CARNEY AND ABOUT HIS --
>> YES.
>> IT WAS HIS ADORABLE CRUSH
ON GUIDED BY VOICES AND HOW HE
PLAYS IN A BAND AND DOES
PRESIDENT WANT ANYBODY TO HEAR
WITH HIS BUDDIES.
AND IT IS TERRIBLE READING
THIS.
YOU DON'T WANT TO THINK THAT
JAY CARNEY IS A HUMAN BECAUSE
HE IS EXERCISING POWER AS A
GOVERNMENT OFFICIAL.
BUT IT IS IS WHAT THE
NEWSPAPERS DO GENERALLY.
YOU WANT TO BUTTER UP THE
SOURCE SO THEY WILL BE NICE
THE NEXT TIME THEY DO A
STORY.
IT IS DISGUSTING.
>> NOBODY HAS BOTHERED TO
GREASE ME UP AS A SOURCE.
THAT MAKES TOTAL SENSE NOW.
IT IS A STRATEGY.
JOE, YOU HAVE A COLLECTION OF
WOMEN SHOES IN YOUR CLOSET AND
SOME FILL WITH FEET.
IF YOU THINK THERE WAS SCANDAL
DURING THE BUSH PRESIDENCY
THEY WOULD HAVE DONE A BIG
FOOTWEAR STORY?
>> THEY COULD HAVE BEEN
BAREFOOT AND THEY WOULDN'T
HAVE NOTICED.
ACTUALLY I WILL BE IN A MOVIE
CALLED SOURCE GREASER FOLLOWED
UP WITH BLACK AND STRAPY.
I DON'T KNOW HOW THEY CAN
MENTION HER HIGH HEELED SHOES
AND LEAVE OUT THE WRITING.
I THINK THIS IS PART OF A PLAN
TO KEEP US DISTRACTED.
IF SHE IS GOING TO TRY AND USE
THAT TO DISTRACT US FROM
BENGHAZI AND THE AP SCANDAL,
SHE HAS TO SHOW UP IN A PAIR
OF GIANT GENE SIMMONS KISS
DRAGON CLAW BOOTHS.
>> YOU WOULD STRAP WASTE
BASKETS ON YOUR FEET.
IS.
>> IT IS BOSS' PROPERTY, BUT
IT IS MY DUTY TO MAKE MY FEET
FEEL AS GOOD AS POTS.
AS POSSIBLE.
IT SHOULD BE SOMETHING YOU
SLATHER ON YOUR FOOT BEFORE
YOU STRAP ON ONE OF HORRIFIC
THINGS MAKING YOUR FEET LOOK
LIKE UNCOOKED SIR LOIN STEAK.
YOU WILL HAVE A BUNCH OF OLDER
WOMEN A GENERATION FROM NOW
THAT WILL BE IN WHEELCHAIRS OR
THEY WILL HAVE BUNIONS THE
SIZE OF BOWLING BALLS.
>> FOR A DOLLAR AFTER THE SHOW
I WILL LET YOU SEE MY FEET.
>> I AM GOING TO DO MORE THAN
S THEM.
I'M HUNGRY.
TOES A LA CART.
>> I THINK IT IS -- IT ALSO
SAYS SOMETHING ABOUT HOW
DESPERATE PEOPLE WHO WORK --
IT IS A BIG DEAL THIS PERSON
HAS A TINY VARIABLE IN HER
PERSONALITY.
THIS PERSON WEARS NEAT SHOES.
>> HAVE YOU BEEN TO WASHINGTON
RECENTLY?
I WAS THERE THIS PAST WEEK.
IT IS AMAZING.
I USED TO LIVE THERE UNTIL A
YEAR AGO.
HOW INCREDIBLY GENTRIFIED IT
HAS BECOME.
YOU NEED THE HOMETOWN
NEWSPAPER TO BE A LIFESTYLE
NEWSPAPER.
WE ARE ALL LIVING IN THE
MODERN WORLD EITHER LISTENING
20 GUIDED BY VOICES WHAT HAVE
YOU.
>> THIS IS A FAMILY SHOW,
GUY.
I LIKE SWEDES AS MUCH AS THE
NEXT PERSON.
>> FROM PUMPS TO POPS HE CAMEISN
COULDN'T RUN.
HE GETS A MEDAL IN MEDDLING.
A NEW JERSEY FATHER, IS THERE
ANY OTHER KIND, HAS FILED A
LAWSUIT AFTER HIS KID WAS
KICKED OFF HIS HIGH SCHOOL
TRACK TEAM.
HE CLAIMS THAT PARTICIPATION
IN EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES
IS A RIGHT AND THAT BOOTING
HIS BOY CONSTITUTES BULLYING
AND HARASSMENT.
BUT THE SCHOOL SAYS THE
SOPHOMORE WAS DISMISSED FROM
THE SQUAD BECAUSE OF UNEXCUSED
ABSENCES WHICH DAD SAYS WAS
DUE TO INJURED LEG AND A DEATH
IN THE FAMILY.
THE PROBLEM STARTED FRESHMAN
YEAR WHEN THE YOUNGSTER WASN'T
ALLOWED TO COMPETE EVEN THOUGH
HIS DAD SAID HE MAY HAVE BEEN
FASTER THAN SENIORS WHO DID.
THIS IS A LONG STORY.
>> IT IS GETTING BETTER.
>> I HAVE TO TAKE A BREAK.
SO THE SUIT CLAIMS KEEPING HIM
ON THE BENCH WOULD HAVE COST
HIM A COLLEGE SCHOLARSHIP.
NOW THE FATHER IS ASKING THE
COURT FOR $40 MILLION, TWO
VARSITY LETTERS AND TWO
CHAMPIONSHIP JACKETS.
MEANWHILE, THIS PUPPY WAS
RECENTLY CUT FROM THE BALL
CATCHING TEAM.
>> THE PUPPY IS STUPID.
WAY TOO BIG FOR YOU.
>> WHAT A DUMB DOG.
AS A DOG OWNER I WOULD BE
EMBARRASSED.
I DON'T KNOW THOUGH.
JOE, THIS LAWSUIT WILL
PROBABLY MAKE THE KID
EXTREMELY POPULAR WITH THE
REST OF THE TEAM, DON'T YOU
THINK?
>> AND THE FATHER CLAIMED THAT
HE WAS BEING BULLIED BECAUSE
HE WASN'T ALLOWED TO RUN.
NOT BECAUSE HIS NAME IS
MAHISMANA THAT HAS NOTHING TO
DO WITH THE SOURCE OF
BULLYING.
BUT HE IS CONCERNED ABOUT LOSS
OF FUTURE EARNINGS OR SKIPS,
WELL IF DASH DARN OR
SCHOLARSHIPS, WELL WHY NOT
JOIN THE CHESS CLUB?
I BET IF YOU ADD UP HOW MUCH
MONEY THEY MAKE IN A LIFETIME
IT IS MORE THAN THE ATHLETES.
ASIDE FROM THE SUPERSTAR
ATHLETES IT IS NOT THAT GREAT
OF AN INVESTMENT.
>>THAT'S A GOOD POINT.
KIMBERLY, YOU CLAIM TO BE AN
ATTORNEY, BUT NO PROOF OF THAT
WHATSOEVER.
>> WHO CARES THOUGH REALLY?
IT SOUNDS GOOD.
>> HOW CAN EXTRA CURRICULAR
ACTIVITIES BE A RIGHT OR COULD
IT BE A RIGHT?
THAT'S WHAT IT IS ABOUT
IDENTIFYING SOMETHING AS A
RIGHT.
>> THIS USED TO BE AMERICA,
BUT NOT SO MUCH SINCE LAST
WEEK I DECIDED.
THIS MAY BE A RIGHT AND IF SO
I WANT A LOT OF MONEY AND TO
BE BACK ON THE CHEERLEADING
SQUAD.
I WANT TO RELIVE MY SENIOR
YEAR.
HE WANTS $40 MILLION?
, VARSITY JACKET 1234 HE WANTS
HIS KID TO GET THE COLLEGE
SCHOLARSHIP.
HE SAYS HE HAS BEEN DAMAGED.
AN INTERESTING CASE.
NOT GOING TO BE ABLE TO PER
VEIL -- PER VEIL.
YOU MAY BE AWESOME, BUT HAVE
YOU YOU HAVE TO SHOW UP.
IT IS LEAK WHEN YOU DON'T SHOW
UP FOR WORK AND WANT THE
CREDIT.
NOW YOU GET IT?
>> NOW I SEE IT FROM THE OTHER
SIDE.
I AM KIND OF A JERK.
$40 MILLION.
IT SEEMS LIKE THEY ARE LOW
BAWLING IT.
SHOULDN'T THEY GET SOMETHING
HIGHER THAN THAT?
IF WE FACTOR INFLATION FROM
THE TIME WE WENT TO HIGH
SCHOOL AND THE ABUSIVE
BULLYING OUR COACHES GAVE US,
$100 MILLION IS THE OPENING
BID.
HOW DID THIS DAD MAKE THE
COACH OF A HIGH SCHOOL TRACK
TEAM LOOK SIM PAW THET TECH?
SIMSYMPATHETIC?
OBVIOUSLY HE IS TERRIBLE AND
HE HATES HIS DAD, BUT $40
MILLION BULLYING AND ABUSIVE.
I AM CONVINCED THAT OUR
CHILDHOOD IS TEATLY CRIMINAL
-- IS TOTALLY CRIMINAL BY
CURRENT MODERN STANDARDS.
>> THEY WOULD HAVE TAKEN ME
OUT OF MY PARENTS' GRASP IF
THEY KNEW WHAT WAS GOING IN MY
HOUSE.
>> OH MY GOSH.
>> NO, JUST A LOT OF
SLEEPING.
I DIDN'T DO ENOUGH OF -- I
DIDN'T DO MUCH OF ANYTHING.
>> YOU WENT TO SE RRA HIGH
SCHOOL, ONE OF THE BEST IN THE
COUNTRY.
>> I HATED EXTRA CURRICULAR
ACTIVITIES.
I JUST WANTED TO GO HOME.
>> YOU WERE RECLUSIVE.
>> I STILL AM AS A MATTER OF
FACT.
YOU HAVE BEEN CHAMPIONING THE
RIGHT TO SUCK.
I COMMEND YOU ON THAT.
DO YOU THINK THE RIGHT TO
BEING IN A SPORT IS AN ACTUAL
RIGHT?
>> ARE YOU NOT LOOKING AT THIS
FROM THE DAD'S PERSPECTIVE.
I HAVE THREE SUPER I WILL I
WILL LEGITIMATE DAUGHTERS AND
ALL OF THEM, ALL OF THEM ARE
NOT GOING TO COLLEGE ON MY
WATCH.
I CAN'T AFFORD THAT.
I WANT THEM TO GET INVOLVED IN
SPORTS AND MAYBE THEY CAN GET
HIGHER LEARNING.
RIGHT NOW THE ONLY THING THEY
ARE INVESTED IN IS SLEEPING
WITH YOUR SCIENCE TEACHER.
I AM MAD AT ALL OF YOU.
GO TO BED.
>> WASN'T ONE OF THE BIG LESS
SONS OF SPORTS IS OVERCOMING.
I TELL THE STORY OF MICHAEL
JORDAN NOT MAKING VARSITY AND
HAD TO GO TO JV.
MICHAEL JORDAN IS STILL
TALKING ABOUT THAT.
BUT IT WORKED.
>> I THINK IT IT IS A TEST
MEANT TO HOW BAD OUR SOCIETY
HAS BECOME.
THAT'S WHAT I USUALLY SAY WHEN
I DON'T HAVE AN OPINION.
THIS IS A TEST MEANT TO HOW
BAD OUR SOCIETY HAS BECOME.
FROM DADS TO FADS.
YOU HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR
MONTHS FOR THIS STORY.
CAN A DEVICE BUILD A SLICE?
3-D FOOD PRINTERS ARE REALLY
HAPPENING.
THANK YOU FOR THAT OR SMERK
FOR SHORT.
IT CREATES A UNIVERSAL FOOD
PROCESSOR.
THAT'S THE DIAGRAM THERE.
THEY HOPE THAT SOME DAY THEY
WILL ALL BE MAKING MEALS FROM
CARTRIDGES OF POWDER.
HE THINKS IT CAN HELP END
WORLD HUNGER.
YOU HEARD ME, FELLAS.
I AM BEGINNING TO SOUND LIKE
SOMEBODY WHO DOES TV IN THE
MORNING.
FOR NOW, THEY ARE WORKING ON
PRINTING FOOD FOR ASTRONAUTS
ON LONG SPACE MISSIONS.
HERE IS HOW THEY PREPARE A
MEAL IN SPACE.
>> KIMBERLY SAID IS THIS SOME
KIND OF JOKE?
THAT'S ACTUALLY WHAT THEY DO
AT PIZZA HUT.
>> NOT WITH THE EGG SHELLS ON
IT.
>> NOT WITH THE EGG SHELLS ON
IT.
I AM WITH KIMBERLY ON THIS
ONE.
>> I TOLD YOU ONCE WE PUT THAT
ON THERE THEY WOULD SEE RIGHT
PAST THAT.
WOULD YOU EAT A 3-D PIZZA,
KG?
>> I MIGHT.
I HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO EAT THREE
DAY OLD PIZZA, SORT OF A
DISTANT COUSIN OF IT.
I HAVE EATEN SOME GNARLY
THINGS IN DISTANT MOMENTS AND
I LOOK TO BILL SCHULZ FOR MY
INSPIRATION.
>> KEEPING MY MOUTH SHUT ON
THAT ONE.
>> JOE, YOU HAVE A MOUTH WHICH
PROBABLY DOES EAT.
COULD THIS BE IN MY MIND
BIGGER THAN THE INTERNET?
>> ABSOLUTELY.
WHO DOESN'T ENJOY THE MEAL
MAKING OUT LIKE -- NONE OF THE
COOL STUFF FROM THE FUTURE IS
NOT HAPPENING.
WE DON'T GET THE ROCKET PACKS,
BUT WE ARE GETTING PIZZA
PRINTERS AND IT IS GOING TO BE
LIKE THE PROTEIN PASTE FROM
"THE MATRIX."
IT SOUNDS ALMOST AS BAD AS THE
PIZZA DOMINOES IS ALREADY
MAKING.
>> THE ONLY THING THAT COMES
CLOSE TO WHEN I WAS GROWING
UP, STAR TREK TASERS IS WHAT
OUR PHONES LOOK LIKE NOW.
>> AND DRIVERLESS CARS.
THAT'S TWO.
>> WHAT ELSE?
>> THE LUKE SKYWALKER
HOVERCRAFT.
>> WOOKIES.
WE HAVE WOOKIES.
>> WE HAVE LIFE-LIKE
ARTIFICIAL DOLLS YOU CAN HAVE
SEX WITH.
THEY ARE CALLED THE
KARDASHIANS.
LENO, YOU CAN HAVE THAT.
WHAT FOOD WOULD YOU MOST
LIKELY BE LOOKING FORWARD TO
IN A 3-D PRINTER?
>> WOW.
THE THING I DON'T UNDERSTAND
IS YOU HAVE TO ADD THE ACTUAL
INGREDIENTS.
DON'T WE HAVE FOOD ROBOTS.
MICROWAVE AS AN EXAMPLE?
I WOULD MAKE A BURRITO NO
MATTER WHAT HAPPENS.
I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING WITH
A BURRITO.
>> I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE WINE
AND I WOULD LIKE PIGS IN A
BLANKET.
>> THAT'S INTERESTING.
I I DO THINK ONCE WE FIGURE
OUT HOW TO STORE STUFF IT WILL
BE A GIANT WALL IN YOUR
APARTMENT.
YOU SAY I THINK I WILL HAVE
PEPPERONI PIZZA AND A NICE PER
LOW.
MERLOT.
YOU COULD HAVE BOTTLES OF WINE
AND PERHAPS SOME PIZZA.
LAST WORD, BILL.
>> BUT THIS WOULD BE EXPENSIVE
AND TAKE A LONGTIME.
>> YOU ALREADY EAT FROM A
PRINTER, BUT IT IS MOSTLY
PAPER AND INK YOU EAT.
>> YES, THIS IS ALL TONER.
I WAS FAMISHED BEFORE THE
SHOW.
THEY ARE JUSTIFYING THIS BY
SAYING WELL EVERYONE SAYS WE
SHOULDN'T PUT AS MUCH FUNDS
INTO NASSAU LOOK WHAT THEY
HAVE JUST DONE.
MAKE SOMETHING COOL WITH
THAT.
EVERYONE KNOWS HOW TO MAKE A
PIZZA.
I KNOW WHAT GOES INTO CRYSTAL
***, BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW TO
MAKE.
IT IT INVOLVES A CHEMIST
TEACHER.
MAKE THAT FOR ME AND I MAKE
MONEY.
>> A BATHTUB AND A CHEMIST
TEACHER.
YOUR FRIDAY NIGHT.
I PREDICTED TWO YEARS AGO ON
"RED EYE."
LET'S ROLL THAT.
>> IT MAKES YOU WHAT YOU
WANT.
>> THE FIRST STEP WILL BE A
PIZZA PRINTER BECAUSE YOU WILL
HAVE THE BASIC -- CARTRIDGES
OF TOMATO SAUCE AND FLOUR AND
A CARTRIDGE OF PAW --
PASTROMY.
EVERY YEAR YOU CAN CHANGE THE
CARTRIDGES AND YOU CAN
PRINTOUT THE PIZZAS.
>> I THINK STWO -- 2007 WE
ACTUALLY RAN THAT.
PRETTY IMPRESSIVE.
>> SO THE CLOCK GETS IT RIGHT
ONCE EVERY FIVE YEARS?
>> HIT US WITH SOME LOTTERY
NUMBERS.
>> SHUT UP, EVERYONE.
WE HAVE TO TAKE A BREAK.
HOW CAN WE FIX THE ECONOMY?
KIMBERLY DISCUSSES HER NEW
BOOK, OUT OF MY SIGHT.
WHY UNATTRACTIVE PEOPLE SHOULD
BE REQUIRED TO LIVE UNDER THE
EARTH EASE SURFACE.
SO CRUEL.
BUT FIRST, SHOULD YOU DATE A
CO-WORKER 1234* PROBABLY NOT.
>>> IS IT OKAY TO DATE YOUR
OFFICE MATE?
KIMBERLY?
FINALLY A SURVEY ABOUT
WORKPLACE HOOKUPS.
THE POLL CONDUCTED BY BUSINESS
INSIDERS FOUND THAT MOST
PEOPLE WOULD BE UP FOR SEX
WITH A CO-WORKER IF THE
OPPORTUNITY AROSE.
90% ADMITTED TO BEING SEXUALLY
ATTRACTED TO A COLLEAGUE.
64% SAID THAT THEY HAD HIT ON
ONE BEFORE.
54% HAD ACTUALLY SEX.
97% SAID THEY WOULD RATHER
HAVE SEX WITH A FAX MACHINE
THAN BILL SCHULZ.
>> MY NICKNAME IS FAX MACHINE
SO YOU LOSE.
>> NO, THEY WIN.
90% SAID HR DOESN'T NEED TO
KNOW DIDLY ABOUT CO-WORKERS'
DIDLING.
LET'S GO TO OUR EXPERT, CODY.
>> CODY.
CODY.
CODY.
>> WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT
DOG?
>> I THINK WE MAY NEED TO LOOK
AT THAT LATER.
140* WE JUST SEE A LITTLE
MORE -- SHOULD WE JUST SEE A
LITTLE MORE OF THAT?
>> OH MAN.
>> CODY.
>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS.
I THINK WE NEED TO --
>> I THINK SOMEBODY THREW CODY
IN A BLENDER.
>> THAT DOG NEEDS TO GO TO THE
VET.
>> THE DOG HAS ISSUES.
WE HAVE TO GET BACK TO THE
STORY ABOUT WORKPLACE SEX.
JOE, AS A COMEDIAN, THIS
PRETTY MUCH LIMITS YOU
SLEEPING EITHER WITH A
WAITRESS AT A CLUB OR
BARTENDER ARE ON PAUL
McCURIO.
>> I WOULD LIKE TO THINK IT
EXPANDS ME.
I USED TO WORK IN AN OFFICE
AND WE FOOLED AROUND WITH A
CO-WORKER AND WE WERE LIKE, WE
ARE SLICK AND NOBODY WILL
KNOW.
A WEEK LATER EVERYBODY KNEW
AND CO-WORKERS LIBELING TO
GOES -- GOSSIP AND TALK.
THEN THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW
IT WAS JOE DEVITO HAS A GIANT
[ BLEEP] THIS.
AND JOE DEVITO HAS A BIG
[BLEEP] THAT.
>> IS THAT TRUE?
>> WELL PLAYED.
I DIDN'T THINK ANYBODY WOULD
BUY THAT.
>> IT WAS FUNNY.
HE WAS WORKING AT A ROOSTER
FARM SO IT WAS NOTHING TO BRAG
ABOUT.
>> OKAY, IT IS ALL RELATIVE.
>> IS SLEEPING WITH SOMEBODY A
BAD IDEA?
AND MIND YOU YOUR CO-HOST IS
ASKING YOU THAT QI JIE. IF
THEY ARE GOOD ENOUGH.
IF THEY ARE UP TO STANDARDS.
PROBABLY NOT THE BEST IDEA
EVER, BUT I KNOW THERE HAS
BEEN UNDERCOVER WORK DONE ON
THIS SHOW.
NOT TO NAME NAMES.
>> HE NEVER CALLED ME BACK.
MATT, YOU ARE A LIBERTARIAN.
WHERE DO LIBERTARIANS STAND ON
THIS?
>> THE DAILY MAIL, CAN I JUST
SAY THE DAILY MAIL WHO IS A
REPUTABLE NEWSPAPER BURIES THE
LEAD HERE.
HALF OF THEN COINTERS TOOK
PLACE -- HALF OF THE
ENCOUNTERS TOOK PLACE ON THE
PREMISES.
PEOPLE ARE *** IN THE
OFFICE.
AS A LIBERTARIAN PEOPLE HAVE
TO DO WHAT THEY HAVE TO DO.
>> THIS IS THE BEST WAY FOR
PEOPLE TO MEET YOUR SPOUSE.
THEY HAVE MORE IN COMMON.
>> THEY WILL MEET PEOPLE IN
COLLEGE AND THEY WILL MEET
PEOPLE IN WORK.
THIS IS WHERE YOU SPEND YOUR
TIME.
>> LIKE MATCH.COM.
>> THIS IS WHY SINGLE PEOPLE
DON'T DATE.
THEY GO CRAZY AND ARE ADDICTED
TO *** SOMETIMES FOR
YEARS AT A TIME THEY WILL BE
ON --
>> ANDY WORKS HERE.
>> BILL, YOU HAD SLEPT WITH
EVERYONE YOU WORKED WITH AND
BY THAT I MEAN THE PEOPLE AT
THE SHELTER.
>> WORKING IT WITH THEM.
I DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT
THE GRIPE IS.
*** H
DIFFERENT THAN DATING
SOMEONE.
>> IT WILL -- UNTIL IT BREAKS
UP.
>> BUT I WOULD BE A *** IF
IT WASN'T FOR WORKPLACE SEX
AND ***.
THE ONLY TIME YOU SPEND A LOT
OF TIME WITH PEOPLE AND I HAVE
A LOT OF THINGS TO WORK
THROUGH BEFORE I CAN GET THEM
INTERESTED.
AND I WILL SAY IN THE IMMORTAL
WORDS OF OUR EXPERT
RELATIONSHIP GUY, CODY --
>> NOBODY SAID IT BETTER THAN
CODY.
I WILL SAY NO WORKPLACE
RELATIONSHIP EVER ENDS WELL.
>> GOD NO.
>> BECAUSE SOMEBODY HAS TO
QUIT.
NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS YOU ARE
JUST LIKE -- YOU SEE EACH
OTHER AND IT IS A SIMMERING
HATE.
>> AND THEN IT IS A STOCKER
SITUATION.
>> I AM TRYING TO THINK ABOUT
WHICH SIDE OF THOSE I HAVE
BEEN ON.
>> THE TRICK IS TO DO IT ON
YOUR BOSS' DESK.
THAT WAY YOU HAVE THE MEMORY.
>> AND THE SPRINTERS.
DO YOU HAVE A COMMENT ON THE
SHOW?
E-MAIL US AT RED EYE AT FOX
NEWS.COM.
DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING FUNNY
LIKE CODY?
I DON'T THINK ANYBODY CAN DO
ANYTHING LIKE CODY.
GO TO FOX NEWS.COM/RED EYE AND
CLICK ON SUBMIT A VIDEO AND WE
MIGHT USE IT.
STILL TO COME, THE HALF TIME
REPORT FROM TV'S ANDY LEVY.
>> TONIGHT'S HALF TIME REPORT
IS SPONSORED BY STRAWBERRIES,
THE SMALL, JUICEY, EDIBLE
FRUIT USED IN MAKING JAMS,
JELLIES AND
>>> LET'S FIND OUT IF WE GOT
ANYTHING WRONG SO FAR.
FOR THAT WE GO TO ANDY LEVY.
>> HI, GREG.
>> GOOD SHOW SO FAR DON'T YOU
THINK?
>> YES.
>> ROLLING ALONG.
>> I HAVE BEEN ENJOYING IT.
>> CODY ADDED A LOT.
>> CODY DID ADD A LOT.
CODY SPOKE FOR A LOT OF
VIEWERS.
>> CODY DID.
HE JUST KIND OF CAME TO THE
SHOW AND SAID HEY.
>> HE MADE IT HIS OWN.
YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID, GREG?
>> WHAT.
>> HE HAD FUN WITH IT.
>> I DON'T KNOW HOW TO HAVE
FUN WITH IT.
THAT'S WHY I SEE A THERAPIST.
>> WASHINGTON POST STORY ABOUT
WHITE HOUSE COUNCIL KATHERINE
WHATEVER HER NAME IS.
WHY DO YOU WANT TO FOCUS ON
REAL SCANDALS WHEN YOU CAN
FOCUS ON SHOES OF THE
WASHINGTON POST?
FIVE DAYS EARLIER THEY POSTED
A STORY ABOUT HOW RUMBLER AND
THE OTHERS DECIDED NOT TO TALK
ABOUT THE SCANDAL.
>> THEY SHOULD NOT TRIVIAL
LIES.
CONQUER?
>> AND JUST TO BACK UP THAT
POINT NONE OF US READ THE
OTHER STORY STORY.
>> CODY DID.
>> THAT'S WHY HE WAS SCREAMING
LOUDLY.
>> MATT, YOU SAID THIS IS WHAT
NEWSPAPERS DO IN GENERAL
BUTTER UP SOURCES WHICH I
GUESS WAS FINE.
CAN WE AGREE THAT THE ONLY
PEOPLE WE THINK IN WASHINGTON
IS GLAMOROUS?
>> WE CAN'T AGREE.
THERE IS AN AUDIENCE OUT
THERE.
THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO WAKE UP
ON SUNDAY MORNINGS AND WATCH
THE SUNDAY MORNING TALK SHOW.
>> THEY DON'T THINK THOSE
PEOPLE ARE GLAMOROUS.
>> MICHELLE OBAMA IS ON THE
COVER OF A LOT OF MAGAZINES
AND BARACK OBAMA.
>> THEY ARE DIFFERENT BECAUSE
THEY ARE RADIANT.
>> WASHINGTON HAS SOME
GLAMOUR.
BUT THERE IS A WEIRD INTEREST
PEOPLE HAVE IN LOOKING AT THIS
AS A GLAMOUR SPECTATOR SPORT.
IT IS GROSS, BUT IT HAPPENS.
>> AND MEN CANNOT BE RAID
YEPT.
RADIANT.
>> CAN THEY?
>> NO BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO BE
PREGNANT.
>> I DON'T AGREE.
>> THAT'S THE TONER MEMBER.
>> DAD SKEWS SCHOOL OVER KID
GETTING KICKED OFF TRACK
TEAM.
YOU SAID HIS SON IS GETTING
BULLIED BY THE COACH, BUT
MAYBE HE IS BULLIED BY HIS
NAME WHICH I WON'T TRY TO
PRONOUNCE. HE IS NOT CLAIMING
THE COACH ACTIVELY BULLIED
HIM, BUT KICKING HIM OFF THE
TEAM CONSTITUTE BULLYING.
>> AS A BULLY YOU ARE
OUTRAGED.
AND I DO GET ANNOYED BECAUSE
PEOPLE TALK ABOUT SOMETHING
HAPPENING.
I SAID REALLY, WAS YOUR HEAD
HELD IN THE TOILET LIKE BACK
IN THE GOOD OLD DAYS?
>> I WAS ON THE RECEIVING END
OF THOSE.
>> REALLY?
>> OH YES.
>> I APOLOGIZE FOR THAT.
>> WHEN I SEE YOU IN THE
BATHROOM WE SAY YES, WE ARE
PUTTING THAT HEAD?
THE STALL.
PUTTING THAT HEAD IN THE
STALL.
>> YOU WERE IN THERE AND DABBS
AND I AND GERALDO WERE SMOKING
CIGARETTES AND WE SAY WHY
NOT?
LET'S DO IT.
HE SELD DEVITO DOWN BY HIS
FEET AND KICKED HIM IN THE
GUT.
HE KEPT YELLING CAUTION.
YOU ARE GOING TO ENTER THE
FLUSH ZONE.
>> DON'T GET ME ON HIS
MUSTACHE MANEUVER.
YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW.
OR MAYBE YOU DO.
TWEET ME.
>> OH WOW.
>> KIMBERLY, YOU SAID LAST
WEEK YOU DECIDED IT IS NOT.
DID SOMETHING HAPPEN LAST WEEK
OR HAVE YOU JUST HAD ENOUGH?
>> ANY NUMBER OF SCANDALS AND
IT DOESN'T HAVE TO COME FROM
LAST WEEK, THIS IS THE TYPE OF
LAWSUITS EVERYBODY IS SEEING.
EVERYBODY IS A JULIA AND WANTS
EVERYTHING.
WHETHER IT IS COLLEGE VARSITY
LETTERS AND SCHOLARSHIPS AND
THEY GET TO BE INCLUDED IN THE
TEAM.
DODGE BALL IS BANNED.
DOES THAT SAY IT ALL?
>> PRETTY MUCH.
WHY DO YOU SAY THE TRACK COACH
IS OBVIOUSLY TERRIBLE?
>> HE HAD A FAST RUNNER AND
HIGH SKIPPED A COUPLE
PRACTICES.
>> THE ONLY PROVE -- PROOF HE
ONCE FAST IS HIS DAD SAID SO.
>> TRUE, BUT HIS DAD WON'T SAY
THAT UNLESS IT IS PARTLY
BECAUSE --
>> GOOD POINT.
>> AND HE IS A LOUSY HIGH
SCHOOL COACH IS THAT HE IS A
HIGH SCHOOL ATHLETIC COACH.
I WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL AND BY
THE WAY, YOU OWE ME $100
MILLION AND I AM NOT EVEN
JOKING.
>> I JUST THINK IT IS FUN --
FUNNY THE DAD SUING FOR $40
MILLION BECAUSE HIS SON'S
CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT TO BE ON
A TRACK TEAM WAS VIOLATED.
IT MUST HAVE TRUTH TO
SOMETHING ELSE HE SAYS.
>> IT IS AMERICA.
EVERYONE IS A VILLAIN.
>> I DON'T KNOW IF YOU KNOW
THIS, BUT THERE WAS AN ACTION
SHOT OF HIM JUMPING.
THERE YOU GO.
>> HE WASN'T ON THE GROUND.
HE WAS JUMPING.
>> IT IS POSSIBLE FOR COACHES
TO PUNISH YOU ALL THE TIME.
>> MATT JUST SEEMED TO ASSERT
IT .
>> WE ARE ON MATT'S SIDE.
>> MEANWHILE, THE KID WHO WAS
A FRESHMAN, BUT THE DAD IS
COMPLAINING HIS COACH WOULDN'T
LET HIM RUN ON THE VARSITY
TEAM.
>> HE SAID HE IS FASTER THAN
GUYS ON THE VARSITY TEAM.
SOMETIMES THEY MAY WANT TO LET
SENIORS PLAY FOR THE WORK THEY
PUT IN.
>> YOU CAN'T PLAY.
>> WHAT PART OF THIS NOT BEING
AMERICA ARE YOU TBHOD
UNDERSTANDING.
>> YOU SAID YOU NEVER DID
EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES
AFTER HIGH SCHOOL.
>> IS THAT BECAUSE YOU WERE
ALWAYS ASKED TO PLAY SLEEPY?
>> YES JIE. 3-D FOOD
PRINTERS.
WE DID THIS STORY?
>> YES.
>> YOU SAID COULD THIS BE IN
YOUR MIND BIGGER THAN THE
INTERNET 1234 HOW IS HE
SUPPOSED TO ANSWER THAT?
>> YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO SAY,
YES, GREG, YOU ARE RIGHT.
>> I ANSWERED IT IN MY MIND.
NEVER MIND.
JOE, YOU SAID THE STUFF SOUNDS
DISGUSTING.
A IT IS A NEAR PROTOTYPE AND
IF IT FEEDS HUNGRY PEOPLE, IT
DOES PRESIDENT -- IT DOESN'T
MATTER?
>> IT DOES DOESN'T STOP IT
FROM BEING DISGUSTING.
SOMETIMES THE PRODUCT DOESN'T
SOUND THAT BAD.
>> I AGREE.
>> ONLY IF IT IS MADE OUT OF
PEOPLE.
>> SOILER ALERT.
NOT HAVING TO DECIDE WHAT TO
EAT?
>> IT IS NICE.
>> DON'T THINK ABOUT "STAR
TREK" PHASERS.
CORK -- WORKPLACE ROMANCE
SURVEY.
YOU SAID PEOPLE HAVE TO DO
WHAT THEY HAVE TO DO.
ISN'T IT UP TO WORKPLACES TO
SET THEIR OWN POLICY.
>> FOR EXAMPLE.
I THINK WHAT NEWS CORP SAYS,
IT SHOULD BE TAKEN.
>> NO WORKPLACE RELATIONSHIP
EVER ENDS WELL.
IN FACT, LAST WEEK THEY
MARRIED A FORMER CO-WORKER.
>> THAT'S TRUE.
>> FORMER.
>> I WAS AT A WEDDING WITH TWO
CO-WORKERS WHO JUST GOT
MARRIED.
I >>-
Q. I WANTED TO GIVE A SHOUT
OUT TO TOM O'CONNOR.
>> YOU COULD HAVE SAID THANK
YOU INSTEAD OF DOING A
SHOUTOUT.
>> THANK YOU.
>> YOU'RE WELCOME.
>> IS THAT WHY, BILL, YOU ARE
SO TAN.
>> THIS IS NOT TAN.
I AM COVERED IN TONER.
>> COVERED BY SOMETHING.
>> I'M DONE.
>> AND GOT FREE FOOD AT THE
WEDDING.
>> THAT'S WHY I GO TO
WEDDINGS, KIMBERLY.
>> CAN ONE SURVIVE AND THRIVE
WHILE LIVING IN CENTRAL PARK.
SHE DISCUSSES HER LATEST BOOK
"I BITE THE HEADS OFF MY
SQUIRRELS AND USE THEM FOR THE
BATHING NEEDS.
AND WHO SHOULD PLAY HILLARY
CLINTON IN A BIO PICTURE.
I WOULD GO WITH SOMEONE FAMOUS
OR UNKNOWN.
BUT WHAT DO I
>>> WHO FITS THE BILL TO PLAY
HILL 1234 SCARLET JOHANSSON
AMANDA SIF RI ED AND REECE
WITHERSPOON ARE BEING
CONSIDERED TO PLAY HILLARY
CLINTON IN A NEW MOVIE ABOUT
THE EXSECRETARY OF STATE'S FOR
MA TIFF YEARS AS A WASHINGTON
LAWYER IN THE MID1970s.
THAT'S THE 1970s.
WHEN ASKED WHETHER THE STORY
WOULD HAVE SEX SCENES THE
SCRIPT WRITER TOLD THE DAILY
TELEGRAPH TELEGRAPH -- A
PAPER, NOT ACTUALLY A
TELEGRAPH -- IT IS AN EVOLVING
PROCESS SO I DON'T KNOW.
SHE WAS AN ATTRACTIVE
26-YEAR-OLD WITH AN AMAZING
FUTURE AND THAT STARTS THE
FOCUS.
OH DEAR GOD, THAT IS A YES.
THIS SOUNDS LIKE A THING AND A
THING AND SHOULD BE DISCUSSED
IN SOME THING.
>> LIGHTNING ROOOOUUUUNNNDD.
LIGHTNING ROUND.
>> MATT, I AM WORRIED THAT
HOLLYWOOD MIGHT BE TOO ***
HER.
>> I'M NOT.
I DID A GOOGLE IMAGE SEARCH ON
YOUNG HILLARY CLINTON.
SHE WAS FETCHING SOMETIMES IN
THE 70s.
APPLE CHEEKS AND GLASSES AND
LIKE THE DARK EYEBROW AND
BLONDE HAIR, DO YOU KNOW WHO
COMES UP LIKE THAT?
NONE OF THOSE THREE ACTRESSES
AT ALL?
LYNDSAY LOHAN.
>> THINK ABOUT IT.
>> I CAN SEE THAT.
THE MOVIE IS DUE OUT BEFORE
2016, THE PRESIDENTIAL
ELECTION.
>> AGAIN?
DIDN'T WE JUST HAVE ONE OF
THOSE.
IF YOU LOOK AT THE ACTRESSES CLN
THE CASTING PROCESS HERE?
BY THE WAY IN MY BIO PICK I
WILL BE PLAYED BY GEORGE
CLOONEY OR HUGH JACKMAN.
>> REECE IS GOING TO GET IT.
>> THIS IS A GOOD POINT.
EVERY AVERAGE JOE WHEN THEY
HIRE AN ACTRESS THEY ARE TWICE
AS GOOD LOOKING.
I WAS THINKING MORE FOR YOU
WOULD BE LIKE A JOE DISCO ROSA
ROSA -- JOE DE ROSA.
>> DOUBLE MY PLEASURE THERE.
HOW WOULD YOU REACT IF
HOLLYWOOD WERE TO DO SOMETHING
ABOUT YOUR STORY.
>> YOU SHOULD.
>> BILL IN DRAG?
>> THAT IS A TERRIBLE IDEA.
>> THAT IS A HUFFILY
COMPLIMENT.
WHAT DO YOU THINK THE CHOICE
SHOULD BE FOR HILLARY 1234.
>> I THINK THAT REECE WOULD DO
A GOOD JOB.
I DON'T THINK SCARLET
JOHANSSON, BUT I THINK REECE
WOULD DO IT JUSTICE.
IT WAS WEIRDED OUT ON THE
STREETS 1K3* TALKING TO COPS
SO HE HAS RANGE.
>> THAT'S A GOOD POINT.
YOU ARE A SEQUENTIAL
HAMAPHRODITE AND CAN CHANGE
YOUR GENDER.
>> PEOPLE GO TO WATCH ME
EXRAING FROM ONE TO THE
OTHER.
IF THERE WAS A "RED EYE" MOVIE
IT GOES BACK TO BILLY GENE
KING.
THEN I MORE OF -- MORPH INTO
ERIN MORAN.
CHACHI LOVES THIS.
60 YEARS AFTER SIR EDMUND HELL
RESCALED THE WORLD'S TALLEST
PEAK.
THEY ARE DEALING WITH CRATEDS
OF CLIMBERS -- CROWDS OF
CLIMBERS ACCORDING TO GAL
GEOGRAPHIC.
THEY MADE THE ONCE INSUR
MOUNTABLE MOUNT CONGESTED.
MANY COMPLAIN OF WAITING IN
LINES FOR UP TO TWO AND A HALF
HOURS ON THEIR WAY TO THE
TOP.
I KNOW IT BOTHERED ME AND I
WAS LOOKING FOR AN ARBY'S.
THERE WASN'T ONE THERE, JOE.
WHY DO PEOPLE WANT TO DO DUMB
STUFF LIKE THAT DISPL -- LIKE
THAT?
>> I DON'T KNOW.
I READ AND THE MOUNTAIN IS
LITTERED WITH PILES OF POOP
AND DEAD, FROZEN PEOPLE.
THEY ARE INDEPENDENT
CONTRACTORS AND IF YOU ARE
GOING DOWN IT IS LIKE SEE YA.
THEY DON'T FEEL OBLIGATION TO
SAVE YOU.
>> I HAVE SEEN GRUESOME
PICTURES OF FROZEN SHIRPA'S.
THAT JUST HAPPENS TO BE IN MY
WALK IN FREEZER.
SHOULD THEY RESTRICT THE
NUMBER OF CLIMBERS?
>> I DON'T KNOW.
>> I CAN TELL YOU CARE.
>> PEOPLE SHOULD GET A
DIFFERENT HOBBY.
IS IT SHOWS THAT HUMANS ARE
DOING BETTER AT GETTING GREAT
INCREDIBLE THINGS.
WHY NOT GO TO THE LEAST
CLIMBED TALL MOUNTAIN.
KG, DON'T PEOPLE CLIMB EVEREST
SO THEY CAN TELL PEOPLE THEY
CLIMBED EVERETT.
>> IT IS AN ECHO STROKE,
RIGHT?
AND I DON'T WANT TO CLIMB INTO
ANYTHING I CAN'T DO WITH MY
LOUIS VUITTON.
>> YOU SHOULD DO THAT IN YOUR
HEELS.
>> IT WOULD BE UH MACING.
>> I THINK IT WOULD BE FUN.
BILL DOES IT ALL THE TIME.
WHEN HAS IT BECOME MORE OF A
PROBLEM?
>> THEY SAID THAT IN THE
ARTICLE.
YOU WILL TRY TO ARGUE WITH
THEM AND WILL LOSE.
PEOPLE ARE COMPLAINING BECAUSE
THEY HAVE TO WAIT TWO AND THAT
OF HOURS TO CLIMB TO THE PEEK
OF THIS MOUNTAIN.
THIS IS A HORRIBLE PROBLEM
WITH A CHAI -- CHINESE RAT.
>> DON'T LEAVE NOW.
WE HAVE ONE MORE STORY.
LOOK AT THAT BOOK.
IF YOU DON'T HAVE THAT BOOK
YOU ARE PROBABLY A COMMUNIST.
AMAZON.COM.
AUTOGRAPHED COPY G GUTFELD.COM
AND I WILL SIGN IT SO YOU CAN
BET.
>>> WHAT DO TURTLES HAVE TO DO
WITH OBAMACARE?
I HAVE BEEN ASKED THAT
QUESTION THREE TIMES TODAY.
MORE LIKE WHAT DON'T THEY HAVE
TO DO WITH OBAMACARE?
RAND PAUL EXPLAINED THAT THERE
WILL BE MANY MORE DIAGNOSTIC
CODES.
THE DOCTORS WILL HAVE TO USE
THE INJURIES SUSTAINED BY
AMERICANS AND TAKE IT AWAY.
>> THERE ARE TWO NEW INJURY
CODES UNDER OBAMACARE FOR
INJURY SUSTAINED FROM A
TURTLE.
YOU MIGHT SEE WELL TURTLES CAN
BE DANGEROUS, YOUR DOCTOR
NEEDS TO INFORM THE GOVERNMENT
WHETHER YOU HAVE BEEN STRUCK
BY A TURTLE OR BITTEN BY A
TURTLE.
THERE IS A NEW CODE FOR -- I
SEE SOME ALCOHOL OUT THERE,
WALKING INTO A LAMP POST.
THERE IS ALSO A CODE FOR
WALKING INTO A LAMP POST
SUBSEQUENT ENCOUNTER.
I I GUESS IF YOU DON'T LEARN
AND INJURIES SUSTAINED FROM
BURNING WATER SKIS.
>> THAT'S CRAZY.
>> MATT YOU SAID IF THE SYSTEM
COULD SAVE US ALL, I WOULD BE
SURPRISED.
>> SPEAKING OF REASON WE HAD
AN ARTICLE ABOUT THIS A COUPLE
MONTHS BACK ABOUT HOW DOCTORS
ARE GOING GALT WHICH IS A
CELTIC EXPRESSION.
HEAD DO CARE WAS I'M --
MEDICARE WAS IMPOSING THE
CODES AND NOT NECESSARILY ON
THE DIAGNOSIS BECAUSE THAT --
I KNOW ARE YOU ASLEEP.
>> BUT IT MAKES SENSE.
>> I AM NOT.
>> IT IS CENTRALIZING AND THE
DOCTORS ARE NOW BASICALLY
TICKET PUNCHERS AND WORKING
FOR HOSPITALS AND NOT SOLE
PROPRIETORS AND THEY HATE.
IT OBAMACARE DOUBLES DOWN ON
ALL OF THAT.
DOCTORS WITH GOOD PRACTICING
ARE WALKING AWAY.
>> THAT'S A SCARY, SCARY
THING.
A BUNCH OF NEW DIAGNOSTIC
CODES.
AND BIRD INJURIES.
HAS AMERICA GONE MAD OR HAS
MAD GONE AMERICA?
>> I AM GOING TO HAVE TO GET
BACK TO YOU.
>> THAT WAS A QUESTION I MADE
UP.
>> NOW I AM SO AFRAID I HAVE
TO IMMEDIATELY MARRY A DOCTOR
SO I DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH
IN I OF THIS.
>> I THOUGHT YOU WERE TALKING
DR. J.
>> NO, A REAL DOCTOR SO THAT
--
>> HE IS A REAL DOCTOR.
>> HOW DARE YOU?
UNBELIEVABLE.
>> JUST BECAUSE HE PLAYS
SKOAL.
>> JOE, WHAT DO YOU MAKE OF
THIS?
THEY NEED TO STREAM LINE IT TO
ONE CODE IF YOU ARE ATTACKED
INTO A WATER SKI AND SLAM INTO
A BED POST.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU ARE
ATTACKED BY A TURTLE DO YOU
SAY IT ALL HAPPENED SO FAST?
>> WOW.
>> I MEAN IT HAPPENED AND THE
TURTLE WINS THE RACE IN THE
END.
REMEMBER THAT.
>> I AM ADDING NOTHING TO
THAT.
BILL, LAST WORD TO YOU.
120% OF AMERICA DOES NOT
SUPPORT OBAMACARE.
THE FACT THAT THAT IS NOT IN
THE TELE PROMPTER.
NOR IS THAT A PERCENT. I
THINK WHEN I LOOK INTO STORIES
AND I REALIZE THE VARIABLES I
GOTTA GO BACK TO CODY WHERE IT
WAS LIKE -- I THINK HE PUT IT
BEST.
>> HE DID.
KOBE WILL -- I THINK -- CODY
IS A MODERN DAY VULTAIR.
>> IT WAS A VOICEOVER.
>> THAT WAS LEGIT.
WE DON'T DOCTOR OUR VIDEOS.
>> GOD BLESS YOU, CODY.
I AM NOT ASSUMING YOU ARE
DEAD.
I AM ASSUMING YOU THIS
MISERABLE.
HE IS MAKING A FUNNY NOISE AND
HE MAY HAVE A PROBLEM.
CALL ME, CODY.
I KNOW YOU CAN'T CALL BECAUSE
YOU HAVE PAWS.
POST GAME WRAP UP FROM TV'S
ANDY LEVY.
>> SOUNDS LIKE HIM.
>> I KNOW.
TV'S ANDY LEVY POST GAME WRAP
UP.
>> WHAT IS YOUR POSITION ON
ABORTION?
>> I DON'T KNOW.
>> YOU TOLD ME TO ASK YOU
THAT.
>> REASON.COM HAS A GOOD FORUM
ON THAT.
GO CHECK IT OUT FOR THOSE
INTERESTED LIKE ME.
>> UPCOMING GIGS ?
>> THURSDAY, JUNE 6th I
WILL BE IN HIGH HOMETOWN IN
CONNECTICUT.
THIS THURSDAY I AM OFF SO IF
ANY LADIES ARE INTERESTED IN
CASUAL SEX I CAN BE REACHED
THROUGH MY WEBSITE.
>> MUST BE A THEME.
>> THAT'S NOT IN THE WORK
PLACE.
>> KIMBERLY, HOW ARE YOU
FEELING?
>> RASPY, CAN YOU TELL?
>> IT IS KIND OF SEXY.
>> IT IS WORKING FOR ME.
>> SHE NEEDED LIKE AN EXTRA
VENEER OF SEXINESS.
>> YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MANY
VENEERS OF SEXINESS.
>> IT IS REAL.
>> UNLIKE BILL.
>>> KIMBERLY SCHULZ, DEVITO,
WELCH.
THAT IS IT FOR ME.
SEE YOU NEXT TIME.
IN THE MEANTIME LET'S STAIR AT