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*saucy music*
FG here That stands for Fantabulous Gal Here.
Oh, I guess it should be FGH. How 'bout TGIFG? Thank Goodness
It's Fantabulous Gal. Wow, so much has happened I
don't know where to begin. I just completed my second and most
dangerous mission to date. *whooping*
That's Kim. And all her friends.
You remember Kim? She's my new roommate. Or I guess
I'm her new roommate. She was DynaGal's roommate, she'd
been gone for four months without her fiance Captain Euchre who's been
missing for five months but she doesn't wear her engagement ring because
it gets flattened on the pole at work. Well, anyway, she returned, and
I survived. It was quite the kerfuffle.
See, I'd fallen asleep on the couch watching Heroes Season 1 on DVD.
You know, for work. She came home in the middle of the
night, pulled out her mace.
Why the woman carries around a spiked medieval bludgeon in her purse
is beyond me. But even in my sleep, my Fantabu-sense
of smell detected her adrenaline and her disinfectant spray perfume.
I woke up, jumped up, slapped the mace out of her hand, and hit
Mr. Crinkles in the head and I don't think he'll ever be the same.
So Kim, in the confusion, asked me if I was DynaGal.
Which is silly, because I'm half an inch taller and
let's be honest, if DynaGal's ever planning on breast-feeding
those kids are gonna starve. I was wearing her bras as a G-string
for like 3 weeks. Once I had Kim in an inverted camel
toe clutch, which happens to be my fave submission hold.
I was able to explain to her what happened to DynaGal, and that I was
here to take care of the house and the cat. To which she said
"Oh, that's a fine job you've done taking care of Mr. Crinkles"
And I said "I'm not the one who pulled out the
mace" And then she goes
"I'm not the one who was living here secretly"
And I said "It wasn't a secret to me. Maybe if you phoned once in a while
to check on everyone and your roommate and see how everything was going
you would know what was going on under your own roof"
And then she said "I did in fact call every single day and left tons of
message and nobody returned my calls." And I said "well maybe if you
had a reasonably easy to crack password on your voicemail then
I would be able to return your calls. To which she said "Password?
All you have to do is press play on the answering machine."
Can you believe her? *music gets louder, saucier*
You think she'd be a little more relaxed after just getting
back from her honeymoon!