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Are you somebody that wakes up in the morning,
And you're like this,
*Groans*
I don't want to wake up.
I'm so sleepy.
*Yawns*
Are you someone like that?
Then this video will be for you!
Before you get trained by me,
Professor Lincoln right here,
You will be like this:
Mommy, don't hit me.
Mommy! *Screams*
I'll get an A+ next time.
Noooo! Help!
Help! Help God!
Anybody, please help!
Don't hit me mom, don't hit me, don't hit me.
*Bangs head*
*Bell rings*
*Moans in pain.*
What time is it?
*Reaches for alarm clock*
*Falls down.*
*Moans*
Mommy! Help!
Wait,
On second thought,
Don't help.
I can get up myself.
My back,
I think I broke it.
*Moans in pain once again.*
After you get trained by the awesome Professor Lincoln,
You will be like this:
*Brushes teeth*
Need to brush teeth.
Turn on water.
Brush teeth.
*Moans*
*Typing starts*
*Head in water mixed with tooth-paste.
*Typing resumes.*
*Gurgles*
*Yells*
My eyes!
*Yells*
*Faints*
See?
Told you.
Taught that guy myself.
I am a very awesome professor.
*Brushes hand on shirt.*
I don't even have anything on here.
Aw, who cares.
If you want to be like that guy,
Then here is lesson number one,
Number one.
Number one.
First, try to stay awake through the whole night,
Until it's time to go to school.
Ok?
Typing appears.
Need to stay awake.
I need to stay awake.
*Shakes face*
*Stares hard at ceiling.*
*Closes eyes*
*Shakes head again.*
*Swears*
Stay awake!
*Sleeps peacefully*
If lesson number one didn't work for you,
Then lesson number two is for you!
Lesson number two is for you!
It's two right?
One, two. . .
Lesson number two,
Lesson number two,
Oh forget it.
Oh forget it,
Lesson number two is for you, there there,
Lesson number two is for you,
There, there.
Okay?
Lesson number two:
Try to crawl out of bed
Or sneak out of bed.
Whatever you want to say,
Without your parents noticing
If they do,
You're in big trouble
And you go *Makes sounds*
If you get out of bed nicely,
Then you get to crawl to the t.v
Then, turn on all the channels you like
All try to watch all the way to morning.
But try to wear headphones
You parents might hear the . . .
That's lesson number two,
Yeah lesson number two.
Number two . . .
Oh for god's heaven sake,
Leave me alone!!!
It's lesson number two.
Get it? Two!
Are you in kindergarten or what?
*Typing resumes.*
Stay awake!
*Typing resumes again.*
Why I even listen to this **** teacher anyway?
Oh my god!
If I want to sleep why don't I sleep huh?
I'm just gonna sleep.
*Sleeps peacefully again.*
If lesson number two didn't work for you,
Then lesson number three will work for you.
Hey, I got it right this time.
Then you need to use the ultimate, thing?
The ultimate unsleep drug?
It's-its coffee.
Lesson number three, is
get into the kitchen,
Get some coffee
And chug it all up.
It'll give you infinite energy for the whole night.
Okay.
What?
Why are you staring at me?
I know you're staring at me.
I know you are.
Stop staring at me.
Wait, oh I forgot!