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PETER: Who says college is all about cracking the books
and all-nighters in the library?
We're really all here to have fun, fun, fun.
Unfortunately, when I say "we"...
I don't mean me.
Generally, I'm a single fn kind of guy.
Maybe without the exclamation point.
Parker...
What the hell are you doing?
Uh, nothing, sir.
I hope you're not thinking you'd rather be out there
having mindless enjoyment instead of helping me
rewrite the textbook on cell regeneration.
No, sir.
I was just about to check the regeneration rate.
You say it like you're checking your e-mail.
Have I not made clear
the importance of this experiment?
No, I get it, sir.
Reptilian DNA somehow can program cells
to reconstruct missing appendages.
Legs, skin...
Chlamydosaurus kingii: the frilled lizard.
Attacked by a predator, it'll leave its tail behind
so it can escape, only to grow a new one later.
Interesting feature.
And?
And I suppose if man could do that...
You're finally getting it.
What would someone like me give to regenerate an arm?
An industrial accident
takes it away,
and an injection of hybrid DNA brings it back.
Time to incrementalize the enzyme reagent.
How's it holding?
Cellular regeneration is at a rate of...
two the third power every 10 seconds.
My God.
This is better than I expected.
Yeah, you know what?
I'm gonna need some time to analyze these results.
Maybe you should go out and have some fun after all.
We always work till exactly 8:00.
Not tonight.
Well...good night, then.
Uh!
[GROANING]
[HISSES]
[♪♪♪♪]
Hey, guys.
Hey! You look familiar.
Harry, do we know this guy?
Hmm. I had a roommate once, sort of his size,
but I didn't see his face much.
Dude was always working or studying.
All right, cut it out.
Some of us have to earn our mochaccino money.
So lose the studying.
Fine. So, what kind of fun, fun, fun
are we having tonight?
Um, well, Harry was having me look at his dad's will.
Yeah, and, uh, I was checking out the view
of the Oscorp building
to see where my dad's office is.
Do balloons come with that package?
Okay, you got us.
Harry hasn't exactly been all fun-lovingy toda.
I wasn't going to mention it if you didn't.
I figured you'd want to take your mind off of it.
You remembered?
The anniversary of your dad's death, tomorrow.
You remembered.
Harry was just asking
if we could help him go through his dad's things
now that the estate is settled.
Hey, I'm sorry to even ask, but--
Don't be.
So give the laptop a rest.
I'll buy you a mochaccino.
Oh, my God. The laptop.
I forgot to give Doc Connors tonight's readouts.
Like I said...
Hiya, doc.
Hey, you're a little late tonight.
Usually, I could set my watch by you.
[GASPS]
How about if you just take the truck?
Vermin, that's what you are.
Someone talking to you?
I was just offering my observation.
Parasites have gotten a bad rap,
when in fact,
they're a necessary part of the animal ecosystem.
Vermin should be wiped out.
We'll see who gets wiped out.
Hi. Are you the local welcome wagon?
I'm here to give you a brush-up course in manners.
Whoa.
Okay...
We'll move right to the advanced course.
[HONKS]
[HORN BLARING]
What the--?
So Spider-Man's in cahoots with street thugs now.
Well, guess this one
didn't count on getting double-crossed.
Didn't you hear me? Spider-Man saved me.
Yeah...right.
As for that punk,
he should be strung up till his eyeballs are pecked out
by genus strigiformes.
Owls.
I don't think they actually like eyeballs.
Parker, I thought I told you to go home.
I, uh, was, um, trying to catch up with you
with the lab results.
You mean this kid was there, too?
See anything, kid?
No. It all happened so fast.
How do you know how fast it happened
if you didn't see?
Actually, I...
You kids.
You want your fancy clothes and your MP5s,
but God forbid
you should stick your neck out for anyone.
Three. It's "MP3."
Whatever.
See if you can jog your memory
in the next 24 hours.
I want to talk to you down at the precinct.
[CAR DOOR CLOSES, ENGINE STARTS]
[HISSES]
Whoa. Nice place.
Sure beats a cubby at the Empire U. Library.
I used to come here all the time as a kid.
Why'd you stop?
Let me ask you something, Pete.
You ever see my dad from age 14 till college?
Dad was pretty much working around the clock.
The important thing is you know he loved you.
Yeah.
I guess that's why he wanted to protect all these photos
by keeping them in the drawer here.
We'll help you, Harry.
Hey, going through this stuff,
it might be cathartic.
Fine, but promise not to throw around
too many hundred-dollar words, Mr. Cathartic.
Well...
shouldn't take more than two or three days
if we all pitch in.
I can pitch,
long as I leave the game in two hours.
A date with a cop.
Uh!
So I don't get it.
The doc sent you home,
but then you come tra-la-laing back
just after we nab the perps.
Yeah. I was, um...
out looking for a pay phone, actually.
Out looking for a pay phone?
To call for help.
Oh, right.
That's where I know you from, Ripley's Believe It or Not.
You're the only 18-year-old in Manhattan
without a cell phone glued to his head.
What happened is...
um, my battery died.
Did you or did you not see said perpetrators?
[LIGHTS BUZZ]
Stay here. The generator will kick on in a second.
[SKITTERING]
Officer in need of assistance.
Central booking corridor.
[LIGHTS BUZZ]
[SCREECHING, YELLING]
Uh!
There's two of them headed for the roof!
Uh!
[GASPS]
Uh!
On the ground! Now!
You're under arrest!
Amazing.
Lizard tail, lizard foot.
Spider-Man, lizard, spider...cop.
Well, it's good to know
there's the occasional human in your viewfinder.
This godforsaken town is overrun with animals.
Actually, Spider-Man is a...man.
Sort of.
Oh, goody. He's a man.
So what's next? The human rat?
I can think of a candidate.
Hey, I wonder if that one's taken.
"The human rat. Outlives entire civilizations.
Overruns whole cities at will."
Huh? Huh? What do you think?
I'm not sure--
Why the hell am I asking you?
You're a photographer, shutterbug.
An overpriced one at that.
I didn't even invoice these.
Miss Brant, get me an invoice for Peter Parker, stat.
Four, five, six photos, 25 bucks each.
Make it 125 even.
But--
Save it. You're wasting time.
Go snap some shots. Just remember,
this is a high-class newspaper, not Animal Planet.
Huh.
Doc Connors.
[RASPY] Parker.
You canceled class.
You never cancel... anything.
Stay back.
I thought your experiments were promising.
Maybe we should continue.
[SIGHS] Yes...on myself.
You sure you're all right?
Maybe I should get you to the infirmary.
No!
Those papers...
You're writing up your experiment?
Can't write without the right arm.
Know how I lost it?
You mentioned an industrial accident.
Government contractor.
Testing a new kind of explosive.
You were involved in that?
Of course not.
Studying reptiles.
Georgia swamp.
No one knew I was there.
After 10 years,
the court threw out my case.
Someone pulled strings.
Go home, Parker.
Sir, you're not well.
Please, go.
Now.
HARRY: I knew my father had military contracts,
but this stuff is weird beyond belief.
"Drugs for human enhancement."
And get this:
"Wide area fragmentation explosive round.
Wafer."
It must be really top-secret to keep it in his own desk.
Maybe you should just leave it.
Sorry this isn't going faster.
No, no, I understand.
It's a bad walk down memory lane here.
You know, you're right.
I shouldn't be reading all this stuff line by line.
Plus, we really should save some work for Peter.
Go get some dinner.
In fact, I'll meet you later and buy you dinner.
Harry, man,
if you want to be all by your lonesome,
my ego can handle it.
I just need some time to digest this stuff, is all.
There's so much about my father I didn't know.
You okay?
Yeah, I'm okay.
What?
For a second, seeing you behind the desk,
you looked just like some of those photos of your father.
I've compared three DNA samples:
Stray hairs from Doc Connors' lab coat,
skin particles on the clothing fragment
I found on the police station roof,
and these strange scales I picked up from his papers.
All three have DNA from the same individual:
Dr. Connors.
But the genetic sequencing has changed over time
to resemble reptilian DNA.
As much as I respect Dr. Connors and his work,
I have no choice but...
To confront the truth
about the kind of man my father really was.
The last few days of his life,
he seemed...different.
I know he didn't deserve to die by Spider-Man's hands,
but some of these documents
indicate strange experimental work at Oscorp.
Oscorp. Oscorp.
Oscorp!
[SIRENS WAILING, CAR HORNS HONKING]
Sir?
Dr. Connors?
Doc?
Oh, my God.
[GASPS]
[GROWLS]
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
[GROWLS]
[HISSES]
Hey, scaly, know where I can get a little tail?
[GROWLS]
Spider-Man.
Get out of here!
Why are you helping me?
Go on, go!
Good, I seem to have your undivided attention.
It's not too late to turn this thing around,
is it, Dr. Connors?
[GROWLS]
Yes, police?
We've got an emergency here.
I think I can help you.
I know all about your experiments.
[ROARS]
Think about it, doctor.
You have your arm back, but at what price?
We don't live in a jungle.
I have to turn you in.
Spider-Man!
You and your accomplie are under arrest!
Accomplice? We just met!
Aah!
Aah!
We got them both.
Let's get them to a holding cell.
[CONNORS GROWLING]
Doc Connors, listen to me.
We can get you help!
If you struggle, you'll just--
Aah!
Fall.
[GROWLS]
Genus araneae at your service.
Harry?
You okay?
Yeah, I guess. No broken bones.
Right. I heard Spider-Man was here.
Yeah, he was here.
Okay, okay, don't make me wish I'd gone out the window.
We'll help you get through this.
Whatever you need.
What I really need is...
For you two to go out and get me a pizza.
Let me gu,
you want to be alone again.
Mushroom and pepperoni would be nice.
I'm buying.
In that case...
Harry has so much anger.
Yeah. I don't envy him.
Look at you.
Do I have food on my face?
No.
You lost your parents, then your uncle,
then, for a while, me,
yet the last few days,
all you can think of is your friend Harry.
Well, I think of myself plenty. It's just--
Thanks for letting me do that.
Not a problem.
PETER: Okay, maybe I'm fun, fun, fun after all.
See, that's the thing about life.
It's always on the move.
If you look in the right place,
You can never be sure what you'll find.