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Hello, folks. Did you think I was dead?
My endocrinologist thought so too.
But despite my equine glucose and cholesteral levels,
and waking up in the middle of the night naked and covered in crap
due to my nocturnal apnea, I’m staying strong.
– What’s that? – Hi, good afternoon.
– Does Mr. Marcos live here? – That’s me.
– Nice meeting you, my name’s Chico. – Nice meeting you too, Chico.
– I came here to pick you up, let’s go? – Pick me up? Where to pick me up?
I work for Pai Vicente de Ogum,
and your ex wife, she went there and ask him for a spell
– …to bring her beloved one within 3 days… – No, no, wait, wait, wait…
– Did Sheila put a spell on me? – It’s still in process, right?
Cause she’s started it on Friday, then it came the weekend, and we don’t open on weekends.
And in the beginning of this week I also had some difficulties,
so the things got a little delayed and so, but… Let’s go?
– Chico, look, I’m really not going. – C’mon, Mr. Marcos, let’s go.
– It’s nearby, man. – I’m not going.
– No, no… – My friend, you don’t have to insist, please.
C’mon, Mr. Marcos, please help me.
You’re the only one left for me to reach my daily goal.
Goal? Do you have a goal to reach?
I have three deliveries a day, I'm already with the other two guys.
Come here, Claudio, come here.
This is Claudio and he’s going back to Bianca today.
Claudio is always around with us, right?
Here, this is Dejair, it’s his first delivery. Are you enjoying it?
Yeah…
Cool, right? Tell him. So, come on, come on.
Look, how did manage to convince them to follow you?
Dude… I’m in this business for a long time now.
No, Let me explain it to you. I get you.
You’re super nice, have a good vibe, you’re pleasant, but look, I can’t follow you.
I’m not in a good moment with Sheila, it’s gonna be awkward, we’re gonna make a scene…
But look, things there are like, we take the “beloved” person there,
you don’t need to be loving her. You go there, sign the paper e go back home.
Afterwards they…
My friend, look, my new girlfriend is here.
Pai Vicente de Ogum told me about… Cinthia.
How do you know about my girlfriend Cinthia?
Yeah, well, I couldn’t fool anyone, I have a work ethic that…
Well, Cinthia’s ex put a spell on her to bring her back within three days too.
Sir? Sheila really loves you.
Did she tell you that?
She misses you a lot.
Why not live that, right?
You’re my friend too, man.
Yeah… I know! So, let’s go, guys?
I still have a lot to do today. I have an evil eye,
two bad lucks and one impotence, okay?
So let’s get in the van? Fix yourselves up there!
Could you sign here, please, Mr. Marcos?
Wait, wait.
Oh, *** it…
Like the three transvestites I met one day would say, are you enjoying the show?
So give me more 20 bucks or I’ll bite you.
Well, the big city could be a very dangerous place.
Three transvestites is almost a tongue-twister.
Three thirsty tigers: say it fast.
Good evening, friend and sports fan, soccer fanatic.
Welcome to our round table.
The Brazilian championship set us up this weekend, it was electrifying!
And that’s why we saved some controversial plays,
the “Rayovac” drible, the one that turns peoples’s power on.
And of course, lots of goals.
But not that “Gol” 1.0 that you can only find on “Saara Cars”,
the biggest car dealership upstate.
I’m talking about the ball in the net!
You say net, you think about “Speed”!
The broadband internet, it’s your broadband internet service
that will make you surf the internet really fast.
But not as fast as on “Decolar.com”!
On “Decolar.com” you’ll make hotel reservations at ease,
with all the convenience and experience that only “Azul Airlines” could provide you!
If you fly “Azul” you won't feel blue.
And you won’t feel blue with this box of “Bis”.
A gift from Tuninho from “Camelia Flowers”!
Tuninho, huge hugs to you, Tuninho!
Tuninho has just became honorary citizen of Presidente Prudente,
and must be selling a lot of flowers, right Tuninho?
And if he’s not selling flowers, he’s on “Super Papo” chat line.
He’s on “Super Papo” enjoying some cool,
friendly, calm, nice, young and straight-forward people.
And if you’d like to talk to 5 people, listen, all at the same time, just dial **112.
It’s easy and only costs 99 cents per minute.
The price of an “Assolan”, the new wire wool that’s winning Brazil’s heart, that’s it!
But look, no more delay, no more small talk, let’s get through to the commercial break
and we’ll be back in a moment with a lot more soccer! Go!
YOU ARE WATCHING
Girl, you look fantastic! Have you spent your vacation in Iran?
Yes I did, how did you know?
WE ARE BACK WITH
Welcome back, friend and sports fan!
This round table is yours, mine, ours!
And now, let’s go straight, no more delay,
with the easy words from the number 1 commentor!
And the number 1 is “Brahma’s” draught beer.
if you’re asking for beer, you’re asking for “Brahma’s”.
A cold, tasty, and super smooth beer, just like “Itaipava’s”!
The beer that’s doesn’t compare to any other, and it’s good!
Is it good? The good one is “Antarctica”, “Antarctica” the beer that goes down smoothly,
just like “Skol’s”, that now comes in liter, big liter and huge liter bottles!
For you to drink on the office’s barbecue party, with your family, with anyone!
Anyone, of course, has a “Devassa” side.
And if you don’t like barbecues, that’s okay, you can go to a bar.
Cause if the bar is good, the beer is “Brahma’s”.
This is no news for anyone, what is new is that “Budweiser” is coming.
“Budweiser”, the official FIFA’s World Cup beer.
– Excuse me. – Hey. Have a seat.
How can I help you… Frederico?
Actually, well, it’s really complicated for me, you know, to talk about that.
– It’s such a crap! – Crabs?
No, not crabs. I meant unpleasant, you know? That’s the right word.
Is it a mole?
Cause if it’s a mole, you should be calm,
cause we can burn it real quickly, the scalpel goes and…
burn it, completely normal.
There’s a TV studio nearby, all the stars come here all the time to burn their moles.
Are you messing around?
– Messing around, doctor? – ***, did you *** a ***?
No, nothing like that…
– Transvestite? – No!
An animal. A dog, cat, goose…
– No, of course not! Not a cat, dog or goose, no! – Parrot?
Not a mole, there’s no mole, no transvestite, no ***, nothing like that.
hat’s why I’m so scared, look.
My *** woke up with Sergio Mallandro’s face.
I know, it’s this *** “hah!” thing all day long, see?
He puts his face out and “hah!”.
He does it for everything I do, he goes “hah!”. I say anything and “hah!”.
I go to bathroom of any restaurant and “hah!”. I’m a joke, doctor.
I don’t know what else to do.
Let me see it, it’s like he’s attached to it, right?
Not attached, it’s in itself.
– Like a head? – It’s the head! It’s all in one.
And did it happen out of the blue?
All of a sudden, I woke up this week and I wasn’t wearing my glasses,
so I looked and I wasn’t sure if it was Sergio Mallandro
or the guy form Jota Quest band. I was only sure it was Sergio Mallandro by the “hah!”.
– Does it itch? – What you mean, Itch?
– Is that an itching area? – What you mean?
It itches normally, like everyone’s. Does it make any difference?
I don’t know if it does.
I’ve never seen anything like this in my entire life, am I, am I crazy?
But listen, I’m just asking, have you actually met Sergio Mallandro in person?
That’s the problem. I met him last week during an event.
He even has a propeller hat, right?
What do you mean, doctor? Can you tell if it’s contagious, if it can be cured?
I have no idea.
With an offering of “Consul” and “Tigre’s” pipes and connections,
while constructing don’t make a fool of yourself!
Let’s go straight to the easy word, Olavo Bragança!
The people’s commentor, the youngsters zigzag, the girls’ little boy.
He breaks the ice but won’t melt the iceberg.
He takes the corner, makes a head goal, takes the ball to midfield,
does a throw in with his foot and defends with the top of his head.
Plays berimbau with one hand and jigs with the other.
Olavo Bragança, the easy word, good evening!
Good evening…
Good evening to you all, unfortunately that’s a wrap.
Thank you Olavo Bragança for your presence,
Accordion Michael who exalts the soccer world with his wonderful music.
Round table, there’s more next week, you know, it’s “Claro”,
of course you have more, of course I do, of course you can find it on “Casas Bahia”
♪ absolutely dedicated to you. ♪
♪ “Lojas Marabrás”, no one could give you a better price! ♪
“Ricardo Eletro”! He went crazy!
Woman to woman, “Marisa”!
This is my world, this is my team, this is who I am.
That’s it, guys. That’s the end of the show,
and it’s time for me to ask you to subscribe to our channel…
To like our fanpage on Facebook…
To like our video…
Did I forget anything? To send an e-mail?
No, you don’t need to send us any e-mails.
Well, when you’re writing comments, try to write a positive one, okay?
Cause maybe if you write a negative one, someone could delete it, you know?
And it’s kind of annoying for everybody, right?
So that’s it, I hope you’ve liked this show a lot.
I think this was a favorite, one of my favorites.
Despite the fact I didn’t even watch it because it hasn’t been edited
when this was being taped…
But I’m sure that you’re gonna enjoy it a lot! All right?
Huge hugs from the bottom of Totoro’s heart.
Tradução e legendas: Melissa Prado