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Look into my eyes, Denise.
Mind if I cut in?
This is Byron, he's my date for the tax party.
Let's explore your fear of intimacy.
What's up with your hair, dweeb?
You insult me like Kate, but you sure don't look like Kate.
New century, thought I'd try a new look.
Kids today... shape shifters...
I've had this face forever.
A new look... can you teach me how to shape shift?
Uh... no.
What's with the humming? It's getting on my nerves.
Just in a good mood. I'm off to work. See ya later.
That's not good.
What do you mean?
You must be dumber than I thought.
All this vampire stuff takes getting used to.
You guys have been at it for centuries. Give me a break.
Why? I don't get a break.
We are undead forever. And it really sucks!
Especially when you're old. Imagine having hemorrhiods for eternity.
Consider yourself lucky. I'm stuck at 15!
I get constant zits, no women will ever date me...
And I have to beg strangers to buy me beer.
Shut up, dweeb. This isn't about you.
That's right, it's about Walter cheating on Beverly.
Walter is not cheating on me!
We all saw the way he looked at Denise at the party. Grandma's right.
How can you be so sure?
Men are men, human, vampire, werewolf or zombie...
Walter is cheating on you! Why do you think he's in such a good mood?
Guess I'll have to beat her up again.
This isn't about Denise. You've got to learn how to control your men.
Observe.
Dr. Goldstein... sit!
Dr. Goldstein... sit!
Dr. Goldstein... lie down.
Dr. Goldstein... rub my foot!
And if this doesn't work, just get yourself another guy...
Dr. Goldstein, go give Beverly a great big kiss!
Oh, stop! Kate, make him stop!
Ew, gross.
I don't want another guy, I want Walter.
If I may interject, Beverly, Walter may not be cheating at all.
What's more likely happening is you're suffering from low self-esteem
Tell me, do you have feelings of unworthiness?
Bad, Dr. Goldstein!
That's the door... someone should get that.
Duh, isn't that your job now?
Jimmy be nice, Brian is your brother now and you best treat him like one.
Just what I always wanted, another brother.
And thanks to Emma biting Brian, I've got another mouth to feed.
Hey, I'm blind, not deaf.
Don't listen to them Byron... whiny babies.
Since Brian is new and Dr. Goldstein is fairly new... Kate...
I'd like to remind everyone about my no biting humans rule.
What about that yummy Nancy Finster?
Completely off limits.
The cat?
No Shadows is my cat.
Squirrels?
Ew!!
First you turn me into a vampire and now you're telling me I can't bite anyone?
Don't worry, I work in the ER. Blood everywhere.
I'll take care of you, Brian. Just don't tell anyone our secret.
This family is really depressing me.
May I suggest Brian, that depression is a complex illness...
... with many contributing factors.
Tell me, have you experienced any traumatic events lately?
Someone really should get that door.
Hey Bev! It's me, Nancy!
Kate, get Dr. Goldstein out of here now. In fact, all of you take a hike.
Brian, would you mind please getting the door?
I suppose.
Ow.
My bad.
Bev, who's this?
That's Brian, our new butler.
I didn't know people had butlers anymore.
Well, he helps out around the house, plays with the kids, does Jimmy's homework.
Oh, thank you Brian. That will be enough.
Whatever.
Nance, I need your help. It's that Denise again.
I thought you had a talk with her at Walter's office party.
Well, I kind of beat her up instead.
No way.
And now things are worse than ever.
But we have a plan
We? I don't know, Bev. Is it dangerous?
Absolutely
Is it illegal?
Most certainly.
Can I wear your Jimmy Woo's?
You mean my Jimmy Choo's?
Uh, yeah.
Let's find his office and install the apy cam.
You need to make Walter jealous.
The answer is obvious. Turn Denise into a vampire.
I can't stop fantasizing about you.