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Hype from Berlin
This is the Schaumschau
Our guests tonight:
Wilson Gonzales Ochsenknecht
Priscilla von Kacke
And Aérea Negrot!
And now please welcome
the daftest showmaster of all times!
Here he is:
Dennis Prinz!
Good evening!
Good evening!
Good evening!
Good evening!
Here, everything, Dennis Prinz
Tonight, hot as chili powder
Skin and bones and totally unjustified: online!
...where we pretend to be television!
***!
This is the internet
all in one
the Schaumschau, the Schaumband
the audience,
Silva,
All those resources...
underused or not used at all.
And that is my fault. Dennis Prinz.
In my show.
The Schaumschau.
I am ugly!
Kick me!
Kick me!
I am stupid!
I can't even talk correctly!
I want to be humiliated, because I am a ***!
Dennis Prinz equals Ashole!
Applause!
L-O-L
You little skunkies.
It's weird how I can write what I want
and the weirdo reads it out load!
Just because it is written down here,
and some stupid girl turns the pages for him...
wink
Pox!
Pox!
I suffer from pox!
I cannot believe it! he actually reads it out loud!
What a sick job!
I have complete control over this dumb puppet on the screen!
And they even pay me for this!
I love my life!
bla, bla
bla, bla, bla, bla
bla, bla, bla, bla, bla, bla!
My inferior skin is old and wasted!
I am an elephant!
And my bank account number is...
Silva?
What?
Jennifer, turn the page!
Hereby a declare you all have a direct debit authorization...
You may take any amount of money...
Turn the page, Jennifer!
Sorry!
Dennis lies down, noisy and emotional.
My name is Dennis Prinz
My neighbours come over to my place when they are *** at night...
And it's good that they do.
Cause I am theirs. And I am a swine.
I admit!
I take the chairoplane just to wee when I am on it.
I stalk my 18-year-old neighbour,
and I did a 3000-page comic book
in which I express my fantasies about her and her friend.
Manga style.
It's really really ugly.
But I think it's lustful.
Cause I don't have good taste.
Jennifer that just sucks!
I don't really know...
I just have to...
Scandals in local politics... Flip!
Flip!
Flip!
Dennis Prinz, and I fear... Flip!
Flip!
Re-opening!
Hurry!
My guests tonight
Wait...
It doesn't say anything on here...
Wilson Gonzales Ochsenknecht,
Priscilla von der Kacke
and Aérea Negrot.
And our music: The Schaumband!
The Schaumband, Ladies and Gentlemen!
Wonderful!
What are our topics today Daniel?
I don't know...
We don't have any!
We have wonderful guests!
I am really happy about that!
Until then, do we have news, Silva?
Silva became a pianist.
Please applaude!
Daniel.
You have a new rubric.
That is correct.
And therefore we'll check out this contribution now.
"Daniel ist"
This is "Daniel ist"!
Today, I want to find out how welcoming our neighbours are.
Let's just go ahead and try.
I just picked a random one...
They can't be serious!
-Hello? -Hello this is Daniel.
-I am sorry, what? -Daniel!
-Hello? -Hello, he is not at home.
This is Daniel.
Yes!
It was me who just rang your doorbell.
Do you maybe have something to eat for me?
Of course!
Would you mind if we came in?
Just go ahead! It's my son's flat, I am just visiting.
So you are only visiting?
Yes, I came from Turkey. And now all I wear are my pyjamas.
Ah, that looks tasty!
I sing too, you know?
That is great!
-Mostly in Turkish. -That is amazing.
I know a Turkish song.
That isn't classical music though.
That's folk music.
Normally I dress classier than this.
I can tell you are classy.
I go ahead and start if that's alright.
-Do you like it? -It is delicious!
What about your husband?
He is as a graduate engineer. He went to a technical university.
He is in Turkey now though.
My brother went to university here, too.
I am so hungry!
Eat it while it's warm!
Thank you so much!
I just made a new friend. That makes me really happy.
I'd say I stay a bit longer so we can chat.
-See you! -Good Bye!
And now *** off! We would like to be alone.
Bye!
Who is getting up now already?
It's not time yet!
Poor!
Tonight we are joined by Wilson Gonzales Ochsenknecht,
Pricillia von der Kacke
who wrote the book "Immer nett. Wie man sich heutzutage benimmt"
And we'll have music by Aérea Negrot!
She will be performing live,
from her album 'Arabxilla'
the song 'Berlin'.
And I'd say... does anybody have any questions?
Me neither!
Exept those for Wilson Gonzales Ochsenknecht.
Please welcome Wilson Gonzales Ochsenknecht!
Wilson Gonzales Ochsenknecht, great that you can be here tonight!
I don't think we ever had somebody really famous here before.
I don't think we ever had somebody really famous here before.
Really? I am not that famous though...
But you are known in the yellow press!
Yes, but not because I want to.
Really?
Well I don't really feel at home there.
Do you maybe want to have a drink first?
Yes...no, ... well okay I'll have a small one.
A small what?
We already had this joke last time,
But would you like your personalised whiskey?
Or your personalised ***?
My brand is the one that pays best.
Which one would that be?
Good question.
Well you can't see right now which brand they are really from...
Additionally we have another *** brand,
a mate brand,
a brand of energy drink,
and, for whoever is interested,
a brand of beer.
The brand that wants to support our show
with a product placement or by sponsoring and that
will pay us a 5 digit sum per show, will be my favorite brand!
Let's have one of that one then.
Well I think my favorite eneryg drink brand...
But we are gonna drink something straight now, right?
Nothing mixed with energy.
-Something alcoholic. -Let's have whiskey then, shall we?
We have to enjoy it. Like when you smoke cigar.
-Do you smoke cigars? -Nope.
That would suit your image though.
Do you think I should wear a suit and smoke cigars?
First of all: Can you say that like that online?
The guy with the cigar.
I didn't say anything!
Cheers!
About your image...
You do it the American way, which I think is great!
Often people feel that they suffer and that they have such a hard time.
And you, you look great, you do your thing,
your lips a gorgeous! And that should be enough.
Please give it up for Wilson!
Thank you!
I am not used to hear things like that.
What I said about your lips?
I don't believe you. Cheers!
Do you want to smoke a cigarette, too?
Yes, please.
We don't have to show the brand, we are not allowed to anyways.
It just sais "smoking kills"
But we are not allowed to show it.
Productplacements for cigarettes are forbidden all together.
-Which is very regrettable of course. -I agree.
Just a second. I think they are messing up your close-ups.
My beautiful face with its big lips...
With your blow-job lips. There. I said it.
With your bog blow-lob lips, Wilson Gonzales Ochsenknecht.
Sadly I have heard that more often then 'beautiful' lips.
Thank you.
Can you see Wilson again? Anika? Great!
What is happening for you at the moment?
What is happening for you at the moment?
In February the film I did with Oskar Roehler came out.
You could see it in the Arthaus Theatres.
And we are now going to...
well do a trial-sequent.
We are gonna start shooting in August or September.
And I am gonna play a punk
who manages a peep-show.
With his big blow-job lips.
In the first film I wanted to become a ***.
So that fits.
And then there is one more film... ...in which I am a male ***.
Last week we had Peter Kern here,
is this in any way related to Peter Kern?
No.
After the show he told us that... How was that again Daniel?
He wanted to have you for a film once
That is when you were still younger.
but it didn't work out because you weren't available then.
-He was very sad about that. -Really?
-That would have been high-culture! -I never got anything from him.
Well he told us. He might have lied...
Well you cannot know if people tell the truth or not.
I'd say
there is nothing but lies here.
At least that's precise.
And I am happy to welcome my next guest!
Priscillia von der Kacke!
Priscilla von der Kacke, Ladies and Gentlemen!
-Von Kacke? -Von DER Kacke.
Kacke is a river in Baden-Württemberg.
That's where my family is from.
Long story.
So you wrote about all that in your book.
"Immer nett. Wie man sich heutzutage benimmt."
Where does good behaviour start?
Did you actually have the book in the foam the whole time?
Almost not.
It's just a book.
Nice work tough!
Wilson do we have a product by you by the way?
Wilson do we have a product by you by the way?
I don't think so...
Isn't there a Wilson Gonzales Ochsenknecht shower gel?
There is one from "Die Wilden Kerle". 2 in 1.
And it doesn't irritate you eyes.
Does your foam irritate the eyes?
We'd have to ask Mark about that.
I bet he got some in his eyes.
Remember when you welcomed me on stage a couple of minutes ago?
Maybe you want to ask me some questions now?
I don't know what the audience expects, but I expected questions.
What is your book about?
I talk about a problem that has exited for some time now.
Not everybody is nice all the time.
And therefore...
I wrote the book.
Well...
Well this conversation doesn't seem to work somehow...
No it doesn't work.
-The problem is... -Where is Eva?
We did this pilot version
and for that we just needed someone to sit here and to talk about himself
and we came up with this character, who, back then, was very amusing.
And now, I realize, it is not funny anymore.
Should I leave?
No, it's not about you!
You are real, aren't you?
I try to be.
That is a good question.
Did Dennis tell you to come here and play Wilson?
He basically just told me to come and sit on this crate of beer.
Well there are no chairs....
How did he say it?
He said he'd be happy if I could swing by.
He told me to come by, be funny and to advertise their products.
He also said it might be funny if I wore a wig.
At first I was scared I might have to wear a wig...
Stop it now. We just cut something in here.
I would like to...
This is awful!
This doesn't seem to work...
The thing is
If the guests are ***, the show will be ***.
I don't know... Does somebody have something more interesting to tell?
You?
What can you tell us?
So here we go. A real story this time.
Hello!
Hello, what's wrong?
I don't know what to say to these people.
What is it you want to know about these people?
Nothing, to be honest.
Maybe you have to instruct them to do something.
Like...?
Like...make out?
I quickly translate: Could you two maybe make out?
Is that the touching story now?
Maybe this young man here could get on the ground, on his knees.
Wilson do you understand?
Could you just go down on your knees?
No problem. Infront of whom?
For the television!
Where is the television?
Everywhere and nowhere.
So where should my head be?
Face towards me. Always everything toward me.
Please give it up for this young lady!
I think I want some action with you.
Do you want action with me, too?
Applause!
I forgot something!
We have got a new rubric in this show.
Which is called "Hater of the Month".
And we have to vote online for that, on Schaumschau.de
It is all a lie though, of course.
There are some great candidates.
You, here in the audience
You, at home, you are allowed to vote.
The Hater of the Month can be anyone or anything
It could be an organisation, DON'T check out my signs yet!
It can be a concern... Daniel, are you still awake?
Yes I am!
Could you just make some noise, this is crazy!
At least that still works.
We are gonna have some Live-democracy now.
There are three nominees for Hater of the Month.
1. Hinnerk Baumgarten
Nobody knows him, and that is a good thing!
2. Bavaria
or, 3.GEMA
That is populism,
something that still works.
Hater of the Month is therefore the GEMA.
And what for have an election if there are no results?
Part of every election should be the nomination.
Just give me a second.
The Hater of the Month
June 2013
in the Schaumschau
chosen democraticly: The GEMA!
But would this be the Schaumschau
if that had been the whole nomination?
I don't think so.
Here we go,
for the Hater of the Month June
The Nomination!
Please Applaude!
Well that was unexpected...
It smells!
Do you smell that? That is the GEMA.
It suddenly smells like GEMA.
The first one's leaving!
Steady-cam! The first one is leaving!
Better?
In two weeks time
we are gonna check out the situation in here.
Until then...
You have to somehow find a way to express all your anger.
And our next guest... how much time do we have left?
Welcome, for a short talk at least,
the wonderful: Aérea Negrot!
Aérea Negrot, Ladies and Gentlemen!
I didn't really get what happend on stage.
I tried to watch a bit, but maybe somebody could explain?
We had a democratic election here.
We voted for the Hater of the Month.
I see.
We manipulated it for populistic sake.
And the winner was: GEMA
So that really happend!
Did you not see that?
Not really. I kinda thought naked was enough.
We went a bit overboard.
Like the GEMA goes overboard every single time.
Aérea, we don't really have much time...
Do you want a quick drink?
We don't really have the time,
because of the GEMA we only have 40 minutes.
The GEMA makes a difference between short and long shows...
Could I maybe have a different glass?
Please don't touch it!
Thanks!
You cannot see anything.
This is the apocalypse. It is the GEMA.
The real Hater of the Month.
Fanfare!
That's it.
Did I ever give you a new glass?
I am good, I drank from the bottle.
Aérea,
are you from Mexico?
-No, from Venezuela. -Exactly!
I don't know much, exept that you are an exeptionally good musician.
I don't know much, exept that you are an exeptionally good musician.
We are now going to see live:
Aérea Negrot, with her song 'Berlin'
Aérea Negrot, thank you very much!
Thanks to all of you!
That's it for today, you were wonderful guests!
Next week again Monday at 10 p.m.
With Lucy van Org
Friedrich Liechtenstein
And lot's of fun!
Thank you for watching! And Good Night!