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>>> YOU HAVE NOW ENTERED THE
ALL GREG ZONE.
LET'S WELCOME OUR "RED EYE"
GUESTS.
SHE IS SO HOT HER BREATH
LEAVES 3 DEGREE BURNS.
I AM HERE WITH AUTHOR AND
COLUMNIST AND FOX NEWS
CONTRIBUTOR, JEDEDIAH BILA.
AND HE IS LESTED IN THE WHO'S
WHO OF WHO ISN'T?
IT IS ANDY LEVY.
AND HE IS OUR BLACK SANTA OR
SO HE TELLS US WHEN WE FIND
HIM WITH A SACK OF THINGS AT
OUR HOUSE.
IT IS COMEDIAN SHERROD SMALL.
>> HASH TAG RED EYE.
>> HE IS TEACHING IN THE
COMEDY SPECIAL, WHAT WE WASTED
OUR YEAR ON AIRING NEXT FRIDAY
9:00 P.M. ON SOMETHING CALLED
NBC.
>> IT IS A MAJOR NETWORK,
MAN.
>> AND SHE IS SO SHARP SHE
OPENS HER MAIL WITH HER
THOUGHTS.
SITTING NEXT TO ME X FOX NEWS
NATIONAL SECURITY ANALYST?
ANALASIST?
>> CLOSE ENOUGH.
>> CASEY MCFARLAND.
>> A BLOCK.
THE LEDE.
THAT'S THE FIRST STORY.
HEY, GREG, IS IT COOL IF I
CALL YOU GREGATRON FROM NOW
ON?
>> YES IT IS.
I AM SOBER BY THE WAY.
CAN CREEPY SLEEP WAY SAVE
OBAMACARE?
IT IS DAY INFINITY OF
OBAMA-APOCALYPSO CARE A GATE.
>> WITH PUBLIC OPINION OF
OBAMA SINKING LIKE KISTIE
ALLEY EASE -- KIRSTIE ALLEY'S
TONGUE IN A JAR OF MAY O
NAISE, SOMEONE ON TWITTER SAYS
HOW DO YOU PLAN TO SPEND THE
WINTER?
REMINDING AMERICANS TO WEAR
PAJAMAS AND DRINK HOT
CHOCOLATE AND TALK ABOUT
GETTING HEALTH INSURANCE.
THE GROUP IS TARGETING
PARENTS.
THE VIDEO URGES MOM AND DAD TO
DISCUSS OBAMACARE AT CHRISTMAS
DINNER.
>> HI, MOM.
>> ARE YOU ALMOST HERE?
>> I WILL BE THERE IN A FEW.
>> GOOD BECAUSE WE HAVE
SOMETHING REALLY IMPORTANT TO
TALK TO YOU ABOUT.
>> OKAY.
THAT'S WEIRD.
ANY HINTS?
>> DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
>> DRIVE SAFELY.
>> BYE.
>> WHAT THE HECK DO THEY WANT
TO TALK TO ME ABOUT?
>> SO WHAT IS SO IMPORTANT?
>> YOUR DAD AND I ARE MOVING
IN WITH YOU?
>> ROOMIES!
>> NO, NO, NO.
>> SO WHAT IS SO IMPORTANT?
>> WE JOINED A CULT.
>> IT IS NOT A CULT.
IT IS CULTISH.
>> IT'S A CULT.
>> WE KNOW WHAT YOU DID IN
VEGAS.
>> WE KNOW WHAT YOU DID AT
MARDI GRAS.
>> WE KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST
SUMMER.
>> YOUR MOTHER AND I -- --
>> HAVE VOINED A CIRCUS.
JOINED A CIRCUS.
>> SO WHAT DID YOU WANT TO
TALK TO ME ABOUT?
>> WE KNOW YOU DON'T HAVE
HEALTH INSURANCE.
>> WE LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT,
BUT IT IS TIME TO GET
COVERED.
>> THAT'S IT?
>> OH GOD.
THEY ARE ALL THE SAME.
THEY LOOK THE SAME.
D CLONES.
CONVERSATIONS LIKE THAT CAN
LEAD TO ONLY ONE THING AND
THAT'S DRINKING.
>> HE WANTS HIM AROUND
LONGER.
>> MIND YOUR BUSINESS, DOG.
MIND YOUR BEES.
>> THE CANINE WANTS SOMEBODY
TO TAKE CARE OF HIM IN THE
ELDER YEARS.
>> YOU DON'T PAY THE BILLS
AROUND HERE, DOG.
I WANT A DRINK, I WANT A
DRINK.
THAT WAS RECYCLED VIDEO YOU
SHOWED TOO.
YOU HAD THAT VIDEO ON BEFORE.
FIRST YOU BRING IN TOPICS FROM
"THE FIVE" AND NOW RECYCLING
OLD VIDEOS?
>> I AM DOING TWO JOBS RIGHT
NOW, AND IT IS VERY HARD.
>> HE HAS A LOT OF PEOPLE ON
VACATION THIS WEEK, SHERROD.
>> WE ARE NOT EVEN SURE IF
THIS IS ON AIR.
THE GUY IN THE PAJAMAS, DID HE
SPEAK TO YOU?
>> YEAH, HE SPOKE TO ME.
WHAT HE SAID WAS I DON'T GET
LAID.
NOTHING SAYS ARE YOU NOT
GETTING LAID THAN WEARING
GROWN MAN PAJAMAS.
THERE IS NO WOMAN AROUND
HERE.
>> ESPECIALLY WITH THE
FOOTSIES.
CASEY, THE PRESIDENT IS URGING
AMERICANS TO PERSUADE THEIR
FAMILY TO GET INVOLVED IN
OBAMACARE OVER CHRISTMAS
DINNER.
WHAT DO YOU MAKE OF THIS?
IS THIS SMART?
>> IT IS ACTS OF DESPERATION.
I THINK THERE IS A DIRTY
LITTLE SECRET.
I DON'T THINK THEY EXPECTED
OBAMACARE WAS GOING TO WORK.
IT IS LIKE A TRAIN STOP -- THE
FINAL DESTINATION IS
SOCIALIZED MEDICINE.
I DON'T THINK THEY FIGURED
THERE WOULD BE THIS POLITICAL
FALLOUT FROM IT.
BUT IF YOU LOOK AT THE PLAN,
THE BUSINESS PLAN JUST DOESN'T
WORK.
IT RELIES ON HEALTHY YOUNG
PEOPLE GETTING INSURANCE.
IF YOU ARE HEALTHY AND YOUNG
YOU HAVE A CHOICE.
YOU CAN SPEND $95 A MONTH AND
PAY THE FINE OR $300 A MONTH
TO BUY HEALTH INSURANCE.
NOW HEALTH INSURANCE YOU DON'T
WANT AND YOU DON'T NEED EXPRU
NOT GOING TO GO TO THE
DOCTOR.
IF YOU GET SICK, THERE IS NO
PROBLEM WITH PREEXISTING
CONDITIONS AND THEN YOU GO AND
BUY INSURANCE.
THE WHOLE THING WAS A PREMISE
THAT WAS BOUND TO FAIL.
>> THIS LEADS ME TO A
DEVELOPMENT THAT I DISCOVERED
EARLIER TODAY AND USED ON "THE
FIVE" AND HILLARY PETE NOW.
WILL REPEAT NOW.
JEDEDIAH?
>> I KNEW IT.
>> BECAUSE OBAMACARE IS
INSTRUCTING YOUNG PEOPLE TO DO
SOMETHING SAFE IT IS ALMOST AS
THOUGH IT IS NO LONGER COOL TO
BE PART OF GOVERNMENT.
IT IS BETTER TO BE THE RISKY
GUY.
LIKE JAMES DEAN WOULD NOT HAVE
OBAMACARE.
HE WOULD SAY SCREW YOU.
>> I DON'T NEED HEALTH
INSURANCE.
I WOULD TAKE MY CHANCES.
>> YOU HAVE A GOOD POINT ABOUT
THAT.
>> UNTIL THE POINT JAMES DEAN
DIED.
>> YOU HAVE A GOOD POINT AS
WELL.
>> ARE YOU SURE HE DIED?
>> UNLESS ARE YOU TALKING
ABOUT THE *** STAR THEN YES I
AM SURE.
>> WHAT IS FASCINATING TO ME
ABOUT THIS IS THE MARKETING
AND PR BEING SO BAD.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT
HAPPENED TO HIS MARKETING
TEAM.
OBAMA IS A GUY WHO WON IN 2008
AND 2012 WITH GREAT
MARKETING.
PEOPLE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT
HE STOOD FOR.
THEY DIDN'T KNOW HIS
POLICIES.
>> IT CAN HAPPEN TO ANYBODY.
>> WITH BAD POLICY THOUGH?
THAT'S WHEN THE MARKETING
COUNTS.
YOU HAVE A GUY IN A ONESIE
TRYING TO SELL ME THIS STUFF?
COME ON.
>> THE DOG DOESN'T LIKE THE
DOG FOOD NO AMOUNT OF
ADVERTISE MEANT WILL MAKE THE
DOG EAT THE FOOD?
>> A GOOD BEATING THOUGH.
>> ARE YOU SUGGESTING WE BEAT
THE GUY IN THE ONESIE?
>> MAKE HIM NEED HEALTH CARE
BY BEATING THE CRAP OUT OF
HIM.
>> YOUNG PEOPLE ARE NOT
LOOKING FOR HEALTH CARE.
COME AND FIND ME AND I WILL
DODGE THAT BILL TOO.
>> AND YOU CAN STAY ON YOUR
PARENTS' IRNS UNTIL YOU ARE
26 -- INSURANCE UNTIL YOU ARE
26 YEARS OLD.
THE WHOLE THING WAS DESTINED
TO CRUMBLE.
>> WE CAN MOVE AROUND AND MAKE
IT WORK.
AS A NATION LET'S COME
TOGETHER ON THIS.
>> THEY ARE EXPECTING YOU TO
DO THE RIGHT THING LIKE THEY
DID WITH THE ARCH DELUXE.
THEY SAID GIVE ARCH DELUXE A
CHANCE.
WE KNOW IT WAS NO QUARTER
POUNDER WITH CHEESE.
THEY PUT IT IN A NEW, WHITE
BOX.
REMEMBER AT McDLT, HOT PART
HOT AND COLD PART COLD?
>> YOU PUT IT TOGETHER AND IT
IS LIKE, GOD, THIS IS GREAT.
IT DIDN'T TASTE GOOD.
ANDY, ARE YOU BASICALLY "RED
EYE" YOUTH EXPERT.
>> YOU DO A LOT OF POLLING.
YOU WILL GO THERE ALONE AND
JUST ASK TEENAGERS QUESTIONS
ABOUT THEIR PRIVATE LIFE.
SOMETIMES YOU WILL EVEN TAKE
THEM FOR A RIDE IN YOUR VAN.
>> HE IS THE BOB BECKEL OF THE
SHOW.
>> DON'T TALK TO GUYS LIKE
THAT.
>> WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?
>> I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
>> RAINCOATS ARE SO 1970s.
>> YEAH, RAINCOATS.
>> IT DEPENDS ON THE WEATHER.
>> TALKING ABOUT HEALTH
INSURANCE.
>> WELL, THE THING IS AS
JEDEDIAH BROUGHT UP, YOUNG
PEOPLE AT THE CHARITY, THEY
SAY THESE ADDS ARE NOT GOING
TO WORK AT ALL MAINLY BECAUSE
THEY ARE PLANNING ON STAYING
ON THEIR PARENTS' HEALTH CARE
UNTIL THEY ARE 26.
I DON'T GET THIS CAMPAIGN.
THEY ARE GOING AFTER YOUNG
PEOPLE, BUT YOUNG PEOPLE DON'T
NEED -- IT IS NOT A QUESTION
OF PAYING THE FINE.
THEY ARE COVERED UNTIL THEY
ARE 26.
WHY ARE YOU GOING OF A THESE
PEOPLE?
I UNDERSTAND THAT THEY NEED
YOUNG, HEALTHY PEOPLE TO BUY
INSURANCE.
THEY SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF
THAT BEFORE THEY RAISED THE
AGE TO STAY ON THEIR PARENTS'
INSURANCE.
THEY SCREW THEMSELVES.
>> THE ANTICIPATION WAS THEY
WERE GOING TO CRUMBLE.
THEY HAD TO KNOW THAT WOULD
IMPACT OWE BOUGH MA YOU'S
LEGACY.
-- OBAMA'S LEGACY.
>> THE OBAMA THE VULNERABLE.
>> YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT
OBAMACARE --
>> IT IS NOT OVER, GUYS.
YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT IT LIKE
IT IS OVER.
IT IS STILL OUT THERE.
THEY WILL HAVE TO MAKE IT WORK
BECAUSE PEOPLE STILL NEED IT.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS?
IF YOU LOOK AT OBAMACARE LIKE
A MOVIE RELEASED LIKE LONE
RANGER WHEN YOU LOOK AND YOU
HAVE ALL OF THE INGREDIENTS
AND YOU HAVE ARMY HAMMER AND
BEAUTIFUL STORY AND YOU PUT IT
TOGETHER THERE WAS SOMETHING
MISSING.
>> HOW ABOUT AN INDIAN PLAYING
AN INDIAN PART?
>> YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
THERE WAS NO SCRIPT IN
OBAMACARE.
I WAS TRYING TO MAKE A POINT,
GUY WITH A WEIRD COLLAR.
HE IS GETTING NIL FROM
BRAZIL.
THAT LATIN AMERICAN COUNTRY IS
REFUSING TO GRANT ASYLUM TO
EDWARD SNOWDEN DESPITE HIS
PUBLIC PLEE.
HE WROTE A LETTER TALKING
ABOUT SPYING ON BRAZILIANS.
I WOULD LOVE TO SPY ON
BRAZILIANS.
YOU KNOW THEY ARE
INTERESTING.
THE NEWS DAMAGES RELATIONS
BETWEEN THE TWO COUNTRIES AND
PROMPTED THEIR PRESIDENT TO
CAN SELL A STATE VISIT TO
WASHINGTON.
BUT A LOCAL PAPER REPORTS THE
BRAZILIAN GOVERNMENT HAS NO
INTEREST IN TAKING SNOWDEN
IN.
FOR NOW HE IS STUCK IN RUSSIA,
HOME OF THE FAMOUS DRESSING.
FOR MORE LET'S GO LIVE TO THE
MOSCOW BUREAU CHIEF.
>> STUPID DOG.
>> IF HE EVER TRAVELS TO
SIBERIA HIS TONGUE WILL BE
STUCK.
>> THAT HAPPENED TO ME WHEN I
WAS A KID.
MY TOPING GOT STUCK TO -- MY
TONGUE GOT STUCK TO A DOG.
LET ME GO TO THE EXPERT.
SHERROD?
I AM KIDDING.
>> GO TO ME.
I KNOW ALL ABOUT THIS.
WHAT AN EVIL ***.
HE IS LIVING IN THE AIRPORT
LIKE TOM HANKS.
HE JUST WANTED TO GET THAT
JOKE IN.
>> THAT IS WORSE THAN
RECYCLING A VIDEO.
>> DO YOU USE AN OLD CELL
PHONE?
>> I LOVE THAT.
>> WHY WOULDN'T HE WANT TO GO
TO BRAZIL?
>> IT IS GETTING COLD IN
MOSCOW.
>> THE BIG BUTTS --
>> THERE ARE BIG BUTTS THERE.
WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO GO
THERE.
IT IS COLD IN RUSSIA AND IT IS
WARM THERE.
I SAW THAT SNOOP DOGG VIDEO.
>> WHY DO YOU THINK BRAZIL
SAID THANKS, BUT NO THANKS.
WERE THEY WORRIED ABOUT THE
UNITED STATES?
>> THE PROBLEM WITH SNOWDEN IS
NOW HE IS A MAN WITHOUT A
COUNTRY AND NO ONE WANTS HEM.
I SAW THEIR SENIOR RUSSIAN
LEADER AND HE SAID IN EFFECT,
YOU GUYS MADE IS UP A BIG DEAL
ABOUT IT AND WE HAD TO KEEP
HIM.
WE DON'T REALLY WANT HIM.
WHATEVER HE HAS HAD TO GIVE HE
HAS GIVEN TO THE CHINESE AND
HE HAS GIVEN TO THE RUSSIANS.
>> HAITI SAID COME ON AND
BRING ON THE MONEY.
GIVE US $7, $8 AND WE'LL TAKE
YOU.
>> A LOT OF THE COOL PEOPLE
SAY HE SHOULD BE HANGED BY A
TREE.
>> WELL IT IS RIGHT BEFORE
CHRISTMAS.
>> YOU MEAN HANGED FROM A
TREE.
IT WOULD BE TOUGH -- YOU SAID
HANGED BY A TREE.
>> I DON'T KNOW.
WHAT KIND OF PUNISHMENT SHOULD
HE HAVE?
>> I THINK HE NEEDED TO
SEPARATE WHAT HE DID AND HOW
HE DID IT.
WHAT HE DID I THINK WAS START
A NATIONAL CONVERSATION ABOUT
PRIVATE SECURITY WHICH WE NEED
TO HAVE.
IT IS ONLY GOING TO GET MORE
AND MORE AMPLIFIED.
FIRST THE PHONE CALL I CALLED
YOU AND YOU CALLED YOU.
NEXT IS WHAT DID YOU SAY WHEN
YOU TALKED TO EACH OTHER?
SEPARATE THAT FROM HOW HE DID
IT.
IF HE WAS A REAL HERO AND A
WHISTLE-BLOWER, HE SHOULD HAVE
GONE TO A MEMBER OF CONGRESS.
THERE ARE LAWS TO PROTECT
WHISTLE-BLOWERS.
THERE ARE PLENTY OF MEMBERS OF
CONGRESS WHO WOULD LOVE THIS
ISSUE.
SNOWDEN WOULD HAVE BEEN A
NATIONAL HERO.
>> IT WOULD HAVE HELPED
SOMEBODY CAREER INSTEAD OF
GREEN WOLD.
YOU SIT ON YOUR PERCH AND YOU
TALK ABOUT LIBERTIES, BUT WHAT
GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO DECLARE
WHAT IS NATIONAL SECURITY AND
WHAT ISN'T?
ISN'T THAT WHAT SNOWDEN DID
WHEN HE DECIDED WHAT IS
IMPORTANT?
>> I DON'T DEFINE HIM AS A
HERO.
WHEN IT COMES TO DOMESTIC
ISSUES, WHAT WAS HAPPENING TO
AMERICAN CITIZENS IN TERMS OF
PRIVACY VIOLATIONS, I THINK
THAT'S KEY.
IN TERMS OF JEPRODIZING OUR
RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHER
COUNTRIES, I THINK THAT IS
ENORMOUSLY PROBLEMATIC OF THE
HE HAD TO KNOW THESE COUNTRIES
ARE INTERESTED IN
RELATIONSHIPS WITH THE UNITED
STATES.
BRAZIL IS A HUGE TRADING
PARTNER.
OTHER COUNTRIES WILL NOT WANT
DETERIORATING RELATIONSHIPS.
>> NAILED IT.
>> YOU ARE LIKE THE
CONVERSATION UMPIRE.
>> YOU DID OKAY THERE.
>> YOU SAID SNOWDEN COULD
CRASH IN YOUR APARTMENT WITH
YOU FOR AS LONG AS HE WANTS.
I DON'T KNOW IF HE IS THAT
DESPERATE.
>> XNAY ON TELLING THE
GOVERNMENT THAT AYE.
>> I SAID HE WILL ALWAYS HAVE
ASYLUM IN MY HEART.
>> WE HAVE A FEDERAL JUDGE
SAYING THE COLLECTION OF
TELEPATHY AND WE HAVE THEIR
OWN REVIEW PANEL RECOMMENDING
REFORMS HOW THEY DO BUSINESS
INCLUDING BETTER OVERSIGHT.
AND SAYING IN DIRECT
CONTRADICTION THAT THE BULK OF
THE META-DATA WAS NOT
PREVENTING ATTACKS.
BUT SNOWDEN IS A TRAITOR?
DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH, GREG.
>> HE IS NOT A HERO.
HE IS A PAWN.
>> BUT HE IS NOT A TRAITOR.
AND KATIE YOU SAID HE HAS
GIVEN ALL OF THE STUFF TO
CHINA AND RUSSIA.
THERE IS ZERO PROOF OF THAT.
ABSOLUTELY ZERO PROOF.
>> ASIDE FROM THE FACT THAT
WHATEVER HE HAS THEY GOT FROM
ELECTRONIC MEANS.
>> I DON'T BUY THAT AT ALL.
THIS GUY KNOW HOWS TO KEEP HIS
STUFF -- KNOWS HOW TO KEEP HIS
STUFF SECURE.
HE ACTUALLY TAKES THE PROPER
STEPS TO KEEPING HIS
INFORMATION SECURE.
>> WHY WOULD RUSSIA LET HIM
STAY THERE WITHOUT GIVING HIM
SOMETHING?
>> POKE US IN THE EYE.
>> HE IMMEDIATELY SAID GIVE
HIM RIGHT BACK.
WELL THEY WILL NOT GIVE HIM
RIGHT BACK.
>> WE STILL KILLED THAT GUY,
THE RUSSIAN BOXER, DIDN'T WE?
>> THE RUSSIAN ROCKY DUDE?
>> YEAH.
>> IF WE WERE SMART WE WOULD
HAVE DONE THE BRIAR RABBIT
THING SAYING WE WANT YOU TO
KEEP HIM.
>> THEN THEY WOULD HAVE SENT
HIM BACK.
>> YOU ARE RIGHT, ANDY IS
WRONG.
SHERROD X YOU GET A B PLUS.
JEDEDIAH, YOU ARE COMING
AROUND AS LONG AS YOU AGREE
WITH ME.
LET'S AGREE ON ONE THING.
ANDY CAN BE SOMEWHAT RIGHT
HERE, BUT LET'S AGREE THAT
EVERYBODY WHO LEAKS DOES IT
FOR THEIR EGO, RIGHT?
IT IS BECAUSE THEY GET
ATTENTION.
HAS ANYBODY NOT DONE IT?
>> THE FACT THAT HE FLED LEADS
YOU TO BELIEVE THAT.
THE FACT THAT HE DISCLOSED ALL
OF THIS AND DECIDED TO GET OUT
OF HERE AND NOT BEHELD
ACCOUNTABLE.
>> WHAT WE NEED TO DO IS PULL
A CASTRO AND SAY WE HAVE A
BUNCH OF SNOWDENS AND TAKE THE
WORST CRIMINALS OFF TO
PRISON.
THEY WILL SAY OH WE HAVE
SECRETS.
>> YOU SHOULD RUN FOR
POLITICAL OFFICE.
>> I AM TRYING TO HELP US
ALL.
>> WE HAVE TO TAKE A BREAK.
A STORY SO AMAZING I MAY ASK
IT BACK TO MY HOUSE FOR A
DRINK.
WHO KNOWS WHERE THAT WILL
LEAD, STORY.
AND IT IS LIKE I DIED AND WENT
TO ROB FORD DANCING HEAVEN.
>> IS THAT NEW FOOTAGE?
>>> THEY WANTED THEIR GREETING
TO BE ANYTHING BUT FLEETING.
A NORTH CAROLINA FAMILY, IS
THERE ANY OTHER KIND, CREATED
A VIDEO CHRISTMAS CARD AND IT
IS A PRODUCT OF SATAN.
LET'S WATCH FANS OF WATCHING.
>>
♪ OH YA ♪♪
♪ 213 IN REVIEW ♪
♪ VIDEO CHRISTMAS CARD PART
2 ♪
♪ DANCING IN THE FRONT YARD
NIGHT AND DAY ♪
♪♪ NEIGHBORS WALK BY AND THIS
IS WHAT THEY SAY ♪♪
♪ ARE THOSE CHRISTMAS
JAMMIES ♪♪
♪ THEY ARE CHRISTMAS
JAMMIES ♪♪
♪ WE BOUGHT A PRIUS ♪
♪♪ WEARING CHRISTMAS JAMMIES ♪
♪♪ WHAT A YEAR FOR KIM.
SHE MET HIM AND GOT A PART IN
"IRONMAN 3" ♪
♪ AND SPENT A I DID WITH RPG.
THAT'S ME ♪
♪ WHAT WAS TOUGHER TO BEAT IS
HER BUSINESS FEET SMOTE.
♪
♪ SHE WAS PUNCHED IN THE FACE
AND SHE WAS 640 ♪
>> I HATE THIS FAMILY.
STOP IT SHERROD.
I HAVE TO GET BACK TO THE
SCRIPT.
THE PARENTS ARE NOT SHY ABOUT
WHY THEY MADE THE VIDEO.
THEY WANTED IT TO GO VIRAL AND
RAISE AWARENESS FOR THE
FAMILY'S NEWEST BUSINESS
PROJECT.
THE COMPANY FOCUSED ON MEDIA
COACHING AND PRESENTATION
TRAINING.
FOR MORE LET'S GO LIVE TO "RED
EYE" SOCIAL MEDIA
CORRESPONDENT.
>> WAY TOO HUMAN.
I DON'T LIKE NONE OF THAT.
>> THAT WAS JAROD LETO.
I CAN TELL BY HIS GROTESQUE
EYES.
I AM IN A BAND AND I WILL BE
NOMINATED FOR AN OSCAR.
DON'T I LOOK LIKE JAROD LETO?
>> YOU DO.
>> I DO.
LET'S GO AROUND THE TABLE.
I LIKE SAY THASMGHT LET'S GO
AROUND THE TABLE.
CASEY --
>> I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS THAT
BAD.
SOME GRANDPARENTS WILL SAY OH
THAT'S ADORABLE.
THEY HAVE JAMMIES JUST LIKE
THAT.
>> IF YOU GOT ONE OF THOSE
FROM PEOPLE YOU KNOW, WOULDN'T
YOU WANT TO THROW UP ALL OVER
THEM?
COME ON.
>> IT WAS CUTE.
THE KIDS WERE CUTE.
>> THE KIDS ARE CUTE, BUT I
WAS GOING TO SAY THE WIFE IS
KIND OF HOT.
YOU WERE JUST LOOKING AT THE
WIFE GOING I WOULD LIKE THAT
UNDER MY TREE.
I THINK THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID.
>> I DON'T THINK THAT'S WHAT I
SAID AT ALL, GREG.
>> SOME PEOPLE SAY I LOVE THIS
VIDEO AND THAT IS TOO STRONG
OF A WORD.
DISLIKED IS BETTER.
HOME WITH NO FLOW HAVE TO STOP
RAPING, SHERROD.
>> I LIKE THE NEIGHBOR THAT
WAS LIKE, ARE THOSE CHRISTMAS
JAMMIES?
>> IT IS ALMOST 2014 AND CAN
WE GET OVER THE WHOLE AWKWARD
WHITE PEOPLE RAPING.
>> IT IS ADORABLE.
>> IT WAS CUTE IN 19MIEPT 4.
-- 1994.
>> IT IS BAD ENOUGH MAKLEMORE
WAS NOMINATED FOR A GRAMMY AND
WE HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THIS
[BLEEP].
>> WHAT ARE YOU DRAKE'S
MANAGER?
>> THERE IS A LOT OF ANGER OUT
OF HIM.
>> WHY DO YOU ASSUME HE IS
DRAKE'S MANAGER?
IS IT BECAUSE HE IS JEWISH?
>> PROBABLY.
>> JUST WANT TO MAKE SURE.
HAVE I TO THROW IN -- I HAVE
TO THROW IN ONE JEWISH
REMARK.
WHAT IS THE ORGANIZATION I
BELONG TO?
I CAN'T SEE THE NAME OF IT.
WHERE AM I?
>> IT STARTS WITH STORM AND
ENDS WITH FRONT.
>> REPORT THOSE THE NAMES OF
YOUR CATS?
STORMY AND FRONT?
JEDEDIAH, DID YOU LOOK AT THAT
AND GO, OH, LOOK AT THAT
BEAUTIFUL FAMILY.
PERHAPS ONE DAY?
>> MAYBE.
BUT IT IS BRIL YEPT.
BRILLIANT.
THEY HAVE YOU TALKING ABOUT
IT.
>> WHY IS THAT BRILLIANT?
>> THEY ARE DOING IT TO
PROMOTE THE BUSINESS AND THEY
NOW HAVE EVERYONE TALKING
ABOUT THEM.
>> I AM NOT EVERYONE,
JEDEDIAH.
>> YOU ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN
I WANT YOU TO BE.
PEOPLE WILL BE LOOKING THEIR
STUFF UP ON THE INTERNET.
WHAT I DON'T GET IS WHY ARE
THEY NOT SELLING THE JAMMIES.
>> I WOULD BUY -- I DON'T KNOW
IF I WOULD BUY USED JAMMIES.
>> YOU KNOW THE GAP WILL BE
ALL OVER THIS.
THE GAP WILL EAT THIS UP.
>> SHERROD, YOU REALLY LIKE
THIS.
EVEN THOUGH YOU KNOW THAT THIS
WAS DONE ON PURPOSE TO START A
BUSINESS, THIS IS MORE THAN A
CHRISTMAS CARD.
IT IS A BUSINESS CARD.
>> I LIKE TO SEE THE FAMILIES
WORKING TOGETHER.
>> IT IS LIKE THE PAR TRIG
FAMILY.
THEY ARE ON THE BUS EARNING A
LIVING.
>> NOW YOU ARE SPEAKING FOX
NEWS LANGUAGE.
>> THEY EAT, DON'T THEY?
MAKE THEM WORK.
>> THEY SEEM TO EAT A LITTLE
TOO MUCH.
A LITTLE PUDGY IF YOU ASK ME.
DO YOU THINK THEY HAVE A
FUTURE?
>> A FUTURE IN WHAT?
>> DID YOU JUST FAT SHAME
THOSE KIDS?
THEY ARE NOT EVEN FAT.
YOU FAT SHAMED SKINNY PEOPLE.
>> IT IS SO EVERYBODY KNOW
WHAT'S IT IS LIKE.
I FAT SHAME SKINNY SO THEY
KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE
FAT.
FROM YOU SKINNY YOU ARE FAT.
SEE, I DID IT THERE.
IF YOU ARE AT HOME YOU SHOULD
FEEL FAT RIGHT NOW.
WHERE AM I?
>> JAMAICAN CHRISTMAS
SPECIAL.
>> BY THE WAY, I LIKE THE FACT
SHE PLUGGED HER ROLE IN
"IRONMAN 3".
>> THEY ARE MARKETING
GENIUSES, GREG.
>> IF YOU GOT THIS AND YOU
KNEW THESE PEOPLE YOU WOULD
HATE THEM.
>> IF I KNEW THEM I WOULD HATE
THEM.
BUT I DON'T KNOW THEM SO I
SAID IT IS CUTE.
I DON'T HAVE TO RUN INTO YOU.
>> I THINK YOU WILL THOUGH.
THEY WILL BE UP HERE.
I THINK THEY WILL BE ON OUR
SHOW NEXT WEEK.
THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN.
>> O'REILLY WILL GET THEM
FIRST.
>> AND HE WON'T LET US GET
THEM.
>> HE IS THE BIG DOG AROUND
HERE.
>> HE IS A TALL MAN TOO.
QUITE A TALL DRINK OF WATER,
IF YOU ASK ME.
>>> COMING UP, EVERYBODY IS
TALL TO ME.
NOT METAPHOR RICKLY.
METAPHORICALLY.
IT IS SPONSORED BY,
FORK-LIFT.
FOR LIFTING AND CARRYING HEAVY
LOADS.
THANKS, FORK-LIFT.
ANYTHING FOR YOU, GTEG.
SHOULD FACEBOOK MONITOR
WHAT YOU ARE TYPING?
JUST IN CASE REMOVE THE KEYS
FROM THE KEYBOARD AND EAT
>>> DOES CHANDLER NEED A
HANDLER?
MATTHEW PERRY, IF THAT IS HIS
REAL NAME, COULD USE SOME
FRIENDS ON MONDAY NIGHT.
DID YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE?
HE DEBATED THE COLUMNIST ON
THE SUBJECT OF DRUG POLICY.
PERRY, A RECOVERING ADDICT
FAVORS DRUG COURTS WHERE DRUG
OFFENDERS ARE OFFERED
TREATMENT INSTEAD OF JAIL
TIME.
BUT THE STAUNCH LEANNE TIE
DRUG DOES NOT BELIEVE IN WHAT
HE CALLS THE FANTASY OF
ADDICTION AND THE BEST WAY TO
PREVENT ABUSE IS FOR USERS.
>> IT IS SOMETHING THEY CANNOT
STOP TAKING DRUGS.
IF YOU REALLY BELIEVE THAT,
YOU WOULD PRESUMABLY THINK THE
BEST THING IS THEY NEVER, EVER
CAME IN CONTACT WITH THE
DRUGS.
WOULDN'T IT THEREFORE BE WISE
TO DETER THEM FROM DOING SO BY
A STERN AND EFFECTIVE CRIMINAL
JUSTICE SYSTEM WHICH ACTUALLY
PERSUADED THEM IT IS UNRISE TO
TAKE THE DRUGS IN THE FIRST
PLACE?
>> MY GOD, I HATE THAT GUY.
>> NEEDLESS TO SAY PERRY
STRONGLY DISAGREED LIKE
SHERROD AND TRIED TO EXPLAIN
WHAT BEING AN ADDICT IS LIKE.
>> I AM IN CONTROL OF THE
FIRST DRINK.
I DO ALL OF THESE THINGS TO
PROTECT MYSELF FROM NOT HAVING
THE FIRST DRINK.
BUT ONCE I HAVE THE DRINK THE
ALLERGY OF THE BODY KICKS IN.
THIS IS DOCUMENTED ALCOHOLISM
PROOF.
THEN I CAN'T STOP AFTER THAT.
>> OKAY, ALLERGY.
AFTER IT WAS OVER THE TWO MEN
MADE LOVE.
THEY ACTUALLY -- NOT SWEET
LOVE.
THEY MADE ANGRY LOVE.
THEY LEFT THROUGH SEPARATE
EXITS.
YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LEAKS TO
PARTY?
LIKES TO PARTY?
>> GAY MARRIAGE, POLYGAMY AND
NOW THIS?
AMERICA IS GOING TO HELL IN A
HAND BASKET.
>> ANOTHER RECYCLED VIDEO.
>> I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS
SHOW. SHERROD, WHILE YOU WERE
WATCHING, YOU BEING ANGRY HAS
NOTHING TO DO WITH DRUG USE.
>> HE WAS TALKING DOWN HIS
NOSE AND OUT HIS ***.
JUST COMING OFF LIKE THAT, I
DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HE WAS
SAYING, BUT COMING OFF LIKE
THAT IS LIKE GET OVER YOURSELF
AND TRY TO HELP SOMEBODY
INSTEAD OF TRYING TO BRING
THEM DOWN.
>> THAT'S SENSITIVE OF YOU.
>> WELL, I AM TRYING TO HELP
THE COMMUNITY.
>> SEE, HE COMES OFF AS AN
***, BUT HE KEPT ASKING PERRY
FOR FACTS AND HE SAID, LOOK AT
ME.
I AM AN ADDICT.
YOU NEED STATISTICS.
MY PROBLEM IS YOU CAN'T USE
YOUR PERSONAL EXPERIENCE IN A
DEBATE.
>> I THOUGHT THEY WERE TALKING
PAST EACH OTHER. THE BRITISH
GUY WAS SAYING YOU SHOULD
PREVENT PEOPLE FROM EVER USING
DRUGS.
AND THEN PERRY WAS SAYING WELL
YOU CAN'T PREVENT THEM, BUT
ONCE THEY START YOU HAVE TO
DETER -- YOU HAVE TO DEFEND
THEM FROM TAKING THE SECOND
AND THIRD AND FOURTH DRINK.
THE OTHER THING I THOUGHT WAS
INTERESTING WAS THE ONE THING
THAT SEEMS TO WORK WITH ANY
KIND OF ADDICTION IS THE
12-STEP PROGRAM.
THE FIRST STEP OF THE PROGRAM
IS TO SAY I AM POWERLESS.
I CAN'T -- I NEED SOMEBODY
HIGHER THAN MYSELF, SOMETHING
HIGHER THAN MYSELF TO HELP ME
GET OUT OF IT.
I THOUGHT IT WAS SAD.
>> I THOUGHT, YOU KNOW,
JEDEDIAH, THAT CELEBRITIES,
THEY TEND TO RELY ON THEIR
CELEBRITY.
IF HE HAD JUST MAYBE DONE A
BIT OF HOMEWORK.
>> WELL, HE HAS EXPERIENCED
IT.
WHEN YOU GO THROUGH SOMETHING
KELI THAT YOU FEEL LIKE YOU
ARE ENTITLED TO A HIGHER
OPINION THAN SOMEBODY WHO HAS
BT. -- HASN'T.
I DON'T NOAH DICTION.
I DON'T CLAIM TO KNOW IT.
WHEN YOU HAVE SOMEBODY TALKING
AT YOU, LIKE THEY KNOW WHAT
HAS HAPPENED LIKE YOU
EXPERIENCED IT.
MY EXPERIENCE IS WORTH MORE
THAN YOUR FACT.
I GET THAT.
>> THAT'S INCORRECT THOUGH.
HIS FACTS ARE WORTH MORE THAN
YOUR EXPERIENCE.
>> TRUE, BUT THINK ABOUT IT
FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF
SOMEBODY WHO HAS SUFFERED AN
ADDICTION.
>> I AM, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT
THAT IS?
IT IS LIKE TALKING TO SOMEBODY
WHO WITNESSED A MIRACLE.
I JUST WITNESSED A MIRACLE.
WELL CAN THAT BE VERIFIED BY
ANYBODY ELSE?
IF IT CAN'T IT IS NOT
SCIENCE.
YOU HAVE TO VERIFY YOUR OWN
PERSONAL EXPERIENCE THROUGH
STUDY OR WHATEVER.
>> I KNOW ONE THING, I NEED A
DRINK RIGHT NOW.
ANYBODY POURING?
>> ANDY, WHO WON THE DEBATE?
>> IF YOU HAVE A DEBATING
STYLE A GUY WHO WRITES WORDS
FOR A LIVING AND ANOTHER GUY
WHO READS ANOTHER GUY'S
WORDS.
HE TALKS ABOUT THE FANTASY OF
ADDICTION AS IF IT IS NOT A
AL THING AND THAT'S UP THERE
WITH JENNI McCARTHY TALKING
TALKING ABOUT VACCINES.
HE WON THE DEBATE, BUT HE
SOUNDED LIKE A SMART MORON.
>> IT IS LIKE A WOMAN WHO HAS
GONE THROUGH CHILDBIRTH AND
SOMEBODY IS TRYING TO TELL HER
WHAT CHILDBIRTH IS LIKE THAT
WILL NEVER HAVE A BABY.
>> INTERESTING THINGS ABOUT
CHILDBIRTH.
>> WHAT ABOUT YOUR
EXPERIENCE?
>> A, IT IS NOT THAT HARD.
>> IT REALLY DOESN'T HURT THAT
MUCH.
>> GET BACK TO WORK RIGHT
AFTER.
>> IT IS AMAZING HOW MUCH THE
BODY CAN TAKE.
YOU PUT A LITTLE DRUG IN
THERE.
>> TAKE A TYLENOL.
>> NOT EVEN EXTRA STRENGTH.
>> AND STRETCH BEFORE YOU TBIF
BIRTH.
GIVE BIRTH.
>> PEOPLE AREN'T HAVING KIDS
BECAUSE IT SOUNDS SO HARD, BUT
IT ISN'T.
IT IS LIKE PACKING A MARY RAW
THON IN AN HOUR -- MARATHON IN
AN HOUR.
>> YOU JUST GOT A BUNCH OF
FEMALE FANS.
THEY KNOW I AM KIDDING.
BILLY JEAN WILL LEAD OUR
TEAM.
PRESIDENT OBAMA NAMED TWO
OPENLY GAY SPORTS STARS TO THE
WINTER OLYMPICS.
IT IS A SHARP MESSAGE TO
RUSSIA WHICH HAS BEEN
CRITICIZED FOR ITS LAW TAR
GETTING HOMOSEXUALS.
KING AND CAHOE WILL JOIN THE
U.S. DELEGATION CON
CONSPICUOUSLY LACKING IN HIGH
RANKING OFFICIALS, ANOTHER
SWIPE AT PRESIDENT VLADIMIR
PUTIN.
NOT ONE SERVING BE CAY NET --
CABINET MEMBER WILL GO TO THE
GAME AND IN THE PAST THEY HAVE
KILLED AND EATEN THEIR OWN
ATHLETE.
>> I HEARD BILLY JEAN KING SAY
AS SOON AS SHE GETS TO RUSSIA
THE FIRST THING SHE WILL SAY
IS WHERE THE WHITE WOMEN AT?
OH THAT BILLY JEAN.
>> SHE IS A TRAILBLAZER.
>> WHERE ARE THE WHITE WOMEN
AT?
THAT IS A CLASSIC.
>> COMING FROM YOU
ESPECIALLY.
>> DID IT WORK FOR YOU?
>> NEVER.
NOT EVEN IN A COURT OF LAW.
>> RELATIONS BETWEEN THE U.S.
AND RUSSIA DON'T SEEM TOO
GOOD.
>> NO.
>> DOES OBAMA THINK THIS IS A
THUMB IN RUSSIA'S EYE?
I DON'T THINK RUSSIA CARES.
>> I DON'T THINK THEY COULD
CARELESS.
BUT THE OLYMPICS ARE
IMPORTANT.
THIS IS HIS REEMERGENCE ON THE
WORLD STAGE FOR RUSSIA.
HIS GIRLFRIEND IS A FORMER
RUSSIAN --
>> BALANCE LEER RENA?
>> GYMNAST.
>> SAME THING.
>> YOU KNOW, IN 1936 THERE WAS
THE OLYMPICS THAT WERE HELD IN
BERLIN.
HITLER WAS JUST RISING TO
POWER.
HIS WHOLE THING WAS JEWS ARE
AMOUNG GREL RACE AND BLACKS
ARE AMOUNG GREL RACE AND THE
AMERICAN JESSE OWENS CAME AND
WON FOUR GOLD MEDALS.
AND THEN HITLER AS THE
PREMIERE OF GERMANY WAS
SUPPOSED TO SHAKE HIS HAND AND
HE WOULDN'T DO IT AND HE
STORMED OUT OF THE STAYED
JUMP.
IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL POINT.
>> THEY NEED A GAY ATHLETE TO
WIN --
>> FOUR GOLD MEDALS.
>> AND HE CAME BACK TO THE
STATES AND COULDN'T GET A
JOB.
I HAD TO HAVE RACES WITH
HORSES BECAUSE THEY -- BECAUSE
IT WAS A FULL CIRCLE.
>> THANKS FOR BRINGING US ALL
DOWN.
THE UPSIDE IS THE HORSES TBOT
TO RACE JESSE OWENS.
>> THE HORSES HAD A BETTER
JOB.
>> TERRIBLE, ABSOLUTELY.
JEDEDIAH, IS IT A COINCIDENCE
THEY HAD TWO GAY ATHLETES
SPORTS STARS?
>> I AM PROUD OF MY
PRESIDENT.
HE IS PUTTING IT OUT THERE
THAT THIS IS WHAT WE STAND
FOR.
THIS IS WHAT AMERICA STANDS
FOR.
I DON'T CARE IF YOU ARE
INTOLERANT.
WE STAND FOR PEOPLE BEING ABLE
TO LIVE THEIR LIVES AS THEY
SEE FIT.
I AM PROUD OF IT.
>> WE WILLED DIT IT OUT.
WE WILL EDIT IT OUT.
>> YOU ARE GIVING OUR EDITOR
MORE WORK.
STOP.
>> ANDY, HAVE YOU BEEN
FOLLOWING THE CAREER OF
WOMEN'S ICE HOCKEY FOR A
LONGTIME.
YOU MUST BE REALLY EXCITED.
>> I AM, BUT HERE IS WHAT I
DON'T LIKE.
EVERYONE IS REFERRING TO HER
AS A SILVER MEDAL LIST IN ICE
HOCKEY.
SHE WAS A BRONZE MEDAL LIST IN
ICE HOCKEY.
IT IS NOT RIGHT TO ELEVATE
SILVER OVER BRONZE.
I WANT YOU TO APPLAUD THEM
BOTH.
>> I HAPPEN TO THINK EVERY
MEDAL IS PRECIOUS.
>> THIS IS GOOD TROLLING BY
THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION.
BUT TO GET A LITTLE SERIOUS
FOR A MINUTE, IT IS THE USUAL
THING WITH THEM. IT IS NOT
GOING TO CHANGE ANYTHING.
>> IT IS A SYMBOLIC GESTURE.
>> THEY LIKE SYMBOLIC
GESTURES.
>> THINK ABOUT THE THREE
THINGS THAT PUTIN HAS DONE TO
THE UNITED STATES.
THEY AREN'T SYMBOLIC.
TAKING SNOWDEN.
SYRIA GETTING THE UPPER HAND
ON SYRIA AND WINNING IRAN.
OR HAVING --
>> AND EGYPT.
>> WHAT DO WE DO?
WE DO SOMETHING THAT IS COOL.
>> BUT WE CAN'T PULL OUT OF
THE OLYMPICS AND BREAK THE
HEARTS OF THE ATHLETES.
>> YOU SAID GAY PEOPLE
SHOULDN'T BE IN THE OLYMPICS.
>> THEY HAVE TO BE.
WHO ELSE IS GOING TO MAKE
THOSE TERRIFIC OUTFITS?
CAN'T SAY THAT?
I HAVE A GAY COUSIN.
HE IS HOSED?
>> I LOVE IT.
THE LAST OLYMPICS IT TURNED
OUT THE --
>> CHINA MADE THE UNIFORMS.
>> WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING
TO?
I DON'T KNOW.
SOMETHING AWESOME I'M SURE.
I AM AN ETERNAL OPTIMIST.
>>> IT IS TIME TO TAKE A
BREAK.
MORE STUFF IS ON THE WAY.
I ALWAYS SAY THAT AND I NEVER
LIE.
THIS IS A NEW BOOK CALLED NOT
COOL AND IT IS WRITTEN BY A
GUY NAMED GREG GUTFELD.
IT IS COMING OUT IN MARCH.
PRE ORDER IT NOW IN ALL BOOK
RETAILERS.
GO TO MY WEBSITE G
GUTFELD.COM.
LOOK AT THAT BEAUTIFUL COVER.
IT IS BEAUTIFUL.
IT IS.
>>> WILL THERE -- WILL THEIR
AISLE BE ANYTHING BUT VILE1234
WARNER BROTHERS IS MAKING A
REMAKE OF "GILLIGAN'S
ISLAND."
>> LIVE FROM THE "RED EYE"
DEBATE CENTER.
>> WELCOME BACK TO THE "RED
EYE" DEBATE CENTER.
DEADLINE HOLLYWOOD REPORTS
THAT THE FILM CLASSIC OF THE
1960s SHOW ABOUT SEVEN
CASTAWAYS WILL BE WRITTEN BY
JOSH GAD.
YES, THAT JOSH GAD.
THE ACTOR FOR APPEARING IN THE
MUSICAL "THE BOOK OF MORMON"
AND HE WILL STAR IN IT, BUT NO
WORD WHICH CHARKT AT THE HE
WILL PLAY.
WORDS THAT LENA DONE MA'AM
WILL PLAY THE SKIPPER IS
UNFOUNDED.
>> THAT IS A SHAME.
>> SHERROD, I GREW UP ON THIS
AWESOME, YET TEAR -- SHOW.
>> DO YOU THINK IT IS WRONG TO
DO THE MOVIE?
>> WHAT WILL IT BE LIKE?
WE HAD "LEAVE IT TO BEAVER,""
MY THREE SONS" AND EVERYTHING
WAS YOUNG AND INNOCENT.
NOW IT WOULD BE LIKE
"SURVIVOR."
>>-
Q. I THERE IS GOING TO BE --
>> THERE IS GOING TO BE WEIRD
"LORD OF THE FLIES" MEETS"
CARNAL KNOWLEDGE."
>> I THINK THEY SEX IT UP AND
GILLIGAN HAS ABS.
>> SHOULD THEY AT ADD A BLACK
PERSON OR SOIL THE OGINAL
NATIONAL TEE OF THE SHOW?
>> DO YOU MEAN AT FOX?
WHAT WAS THE REST?
>> I DON'T REMEMBER.
>> SHOULD THEY KEEP IT AS PURE
AS THE PROFESSOR'S WHITE
SHIRT?
>> THEY SHOULD MAKE IT PURE,
BUT MAKE IT FUNNY AND
COMICAL.
YOU CAN MAKE IT CHEMICAL AND
STILL NEW AND NOT TOO FILTHY
OR GROSS.
>> ALL I AM SAYING IS MY
SKIPPER IS WHITE.
>> I AM WELL AWARE OF THAT.
>> WHAT WAS THAT GIRL'S
PROBLEM?
>> HERE IS MY CAST.
MARIANNE, JENNIFER LAWRENCE.
CHRISTINA HENDRIX AT GINGER.
HELEN MERE RAN AS LOVIE HOWL
AND GLEN CLOSE AS THURSTON
HOWL. ROMNEY AS
THURSTON HOWL.
AND GARY OHLMAN CAN BE THE
SKIPPER.
>>
>> YOU ADDED THE BLACK ELEMENT.
>> I ADDED BLACKS AND GAYS AND
ONE OF EITHER THE BLACK PERSON
OR THE -- OR ONE OF THE GAYS
WILL BE JEWISH.
>> ACTUALLY THIS COULD BE YOUR
SHOW.
"GILLIGAN'S ISLAND."
>> WHAT ME?
I WAS ALSO TOLD I LOOK LIKE A
DENVER OMELETTE.
I ENJOY A DENVER OMELETTE SO
DON'T SEND THEM IN THE MAIL.
JEDEDIAH, WHAT IS YOUR TAKE
AND WHO DO YOU SEE IN THE
MOVIE?
>> I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT IN A
MOVIE.
WHEN YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH A
CAST AND CHARACTERS IT IS
REALLY HARD TO IMAGINE SOMEONE
ELSE PLAYING THAT.
I DON'T KNOW WHY THEY HAVE TO
MAKE "THE BRADY BUNCH" INTO A
MOVIE.
THERE IS SOMETHING ABOUT
APPRECIATING FOR WHAT IT WAS.
WE ARE NOT TRYING TO RECREATE
IT.
IF YOU ARE GOING TO RE-DO
SOMETHING MAKE IT DIFFERENT.
AND THEN THAT IS UNSETTLING.
>> THEY DID REMAKE "GILLIGAN'S
ISLAND."
IT WAS CALLED "LOST" IF YOU
REMEMBER.
AND IT DIDN'T WORK.
>> IT TOOK A LONGTIME NOT TO
WORK THOUGH.
>> IT WAS A VERY CONFUSING
"GILLIGAN'S ISLAND."
IT WAS LIKE GILLIGAN'S
NIGHTMARE.
LYNDSAY LOHAN AS THE STAR AND
YOU KNOW WHO IS MARIANNE?
THE GIRL FROM "JUNEAU."
GILLIGAN WOULD BE MICHAEL
SENA.
SKIPPER WOULD BE JOHN
GOODMAN.
I KNOW THAT IS PREDICTABLE.
THE PROFESSOR IS JOSHUA MOLINA
AND THE MILLIONAIRE IS KURT
RUSSELL AND HIS WIFE WOULD BE
PAT SAJAK.
>> THE PROFESSOR WOULD BE
CONRAD MURRAY.
THE DUDE, MICHAEL JACKSON'S
DOCTOR.
THAT'S THE PROFESSOR.
LIL KIM AS GINGER.
NO LIL KIM AS MARIANNE.
AT GINGER I HAVE KESHA.
THE RICH OLD WHITE PEOPLE,
THURSTON HOWL AND LOVEY, THAT
WILL BE TIGHT.
I DON'T KNOW.
SOMEBODY FROM FOX NEWS.
LO UDAA -- LOU DAABS AND HIS
WIFE.
AND GILLIGAN IS GREG GUTFELD
AND THE SKIPPER IS JOHN
GOODMAN TOO.
>> I LIKE AT THE COMMERCIAL
BREAK THEY HAD SPECIFIC MUSIC
WHEN THINGS WEREN'T GOING
WELL.
IT WAS ♪
OH MY GOD, SOMETHING IS
HAPPENING.
AND THEN WHEN THEY ARE LOOKING
AROUND IN THE JUNGLE IT WAS --
♪♪
>> THEY MADE IT AT A COLLEGE
SOMEWHERE.
>> HOW IS THIS SHOW NOT ON AT
A P.M.?
AT 8 P.M.
COME ON.
>> EVERYBODY REMEMBERS THE
THEME, BUT THEY DON'T REMEMBER
THE SEGMENTED MUSIC PARTS.
MADE BY I THINK THE -- I CAN'T
REMEMBER THE GUY WHO DID
THAT.
WE HAVE TO TAKE A BREAK.
THE LAST STORY COMING UP IS A
>>> QUICK PROGRAM NOTE.
WATCH OUR NEW YEAR'S EVE
SPECIAL.
12:30 A.M. AND 9:30 P.M.
PACIFIC.
WE HAVE SHERROD AND DANA
PERINO AND GAVIN McGINNIS.
>> E BLOCK.
LAST STORY.
THAT'S THE LAST STORY.
>> THE CAMERA LOVES HIM.
AMERICA'S MAYOR, ROB FORD IS
BACK IN THE NEWS AFTER FAR TOO
LONG AN ABSENCE.
THE LOVABLE LUG THAT WAS
FILMED DANCING TO BOB MARLEY'S
"ONE LOVE."
LET'S ROLL THIS.
YOU HAVE SEEN THIS.
♪ ONE LOVE ♪
♪♪ ONE HEART ♪♪
♪ GIVE AND THANKS AND PRAISE
TO THE LORD ♪
♪ AND I WILL FEEL ALL RIGHT ♪♪
♪♪ LET'S GET TOGETHER ♪
♪ AND FEEL ALL RIGHT ♪♪
♪ WHOA ♪
♪♪ LET'S GET TOGETHER ♪♪
♪ TO FIGHT THIS WHOLE -- ONE
LOVE ♪
♪♪ ONE HEART ♪♪
♪ LET'S GET TOGETHER ♪♪
♪ AND FEEL ALL RIGHT ♪
♪ ONE LOVE ♪
♪♪
>> WESLEY SNIPES HAS FALLEN.
IT IS LIKE A BAD, BAD FIST
CONCERT.
WHITE PEOPLE GOING LIKE THIS.
>> I THOUGHT IT WAS ZOMBIES.
IS THERE MORE OR IS THAT IT
SOME .
>> GO FOR IT.
A CHRISTMAS SONG.
>>
♪ COME ON.
♪♪
♪ MERRY CHRISTMAS ♪♪
♪ MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ♪
>> KT, IS TORONTO ON TO
SOMETHING?
THEY DON'T CARE.
>> I WAS IN TORONTO LAST WEEK
AND THE AMAZING THING IS HE
WILL WIN RE-ELECTION.
FIRST OF ALL HE HAS CUT TAXES
AND HE HAS STREAM LINED
GOVERNMENT.
THERE IS A CERTAIN PART OF
TORONTO THAT LOVES THE ARCHIE
BUNKER THING.
HE HAS THE WHOLE RECUFF
RECOMMUNITY WHO -- RECOVERY
COMMUNITY THINKS HE IS GREAT.
HE LOST WEIGHT AND HE IS GOING
AA MEETINGS.
>> HE MAY HAVE MISSED A
HANDFUL OF THOSE MEETINGS.
DIDN'T HIT EVERY ONE, BUT HE
IS TRYING.
>> AND HE DIDN'T JUST CUT
TAXES, HE CUT A LOT OF
THINGS.
USUALLY ON A CD CASE.
>> WITH A CREDIT CARD.
>> JEDEDIAH, THEIR POLITICS IS
%IKE ONE LONG CHRISTMAS PARTY
THAT NEVER ENDS.
IT IS LIKE A CHRISTMAS PARTY
THAT NEVER ENDS.
>> HE IS A LIKABLE GUY.
THAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
HIM AND ANTHONY WIENER.
YOU HATE ANTHONY WIENER.
YOU WATCH HIM AND CAN'T STAND
HIM.
THIS GUY YOU ARE LIKE, I COULD
GO TO A PARTY WITH HIM.
>> HAVE A BEER WITH HIM.
>> UNTIL HE SEXUALLY HARASSES
YOU.
>> AND YOU WAKE UP AND YOUR
PANTS ARE GONE AND HE IS
WEARING THEM AROUND THE HEAD.
>> THERE IS ONLY ONE THING YOU
CAN TELL FROM THE VIDEO IS HE
IS DONE WITH THE COKE AND HE
IS DONE WITH THE CRACK AND
YOUR BOY IS ON THE MOLLY NOW.
EVERYBODY IS DANCING UP
THERE.
WHAT ARE THEY DMOG CANADA?
THEY ARE HAVING FUN.
>> THEY USED TO BE AMERICA'S
ADDICT AND NOW THEY ARE
AMERICA'S UNDER PAPT.
THEY ARE TIGHT AND DASH I WENT
OUT ON A LIMB ON THAT ONE AND
FELL ON MY FACE.
LUCKILY WE ARE OUT OF TIME.
I THOUGHT WE WERE.
HOW MUCH TIME?
WE HAVE 20 SECONDS?
LET'S DO THAT JOKE OVER
AGAIN.
THEY USED TO BE AMERICA'S
ADDICT.
AND NOW THEY ARE AMERICA'S
PETS.
BROAD, SEXY.
>> AND UNAFRAID.
>>
>> UNAFRAID.