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THE LEAGUE OF S.T.E.A.M. IN...
(jingling bells)
"THE FRIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS"
(Jager) 'Twas the night before Christmas,
or so the story goes,
not a creature was stirring, not even the rose.
The steam packs were hung by the chimney with care in hopes that St. Nicholas
soon would be there.
The leaguers were nestled all snug in their bed,
while visions of clockwork danced in their heads.
And Zed in his fez, and I in my top hat
had gone to the parlor to set up a trap
when down in the lab there arose such a clatter!
I sprang up so fast my beaker did shatter!
Fate chose this moment for Zed's collar to fail
while noxious vapors my nose did assail.
I called out to rose with a terrible cry,
"Go awaken the team before we all die!"
when what to my wondering eyes did appear but a werewolf,
a vampire, and the ghost of Shakespeare!
Rose passed these creatures, completely unseen,
while I, in a girl's voice proceeded to scream! My hideous howling alerted
the crew who sprang from their slumber,
completely askew!
Hey, Jasper! Where's Junior?
I thought he's with you!
- Hey, lady! - I'm Potts!
Get off me! There's goo!
- Is that Mooney? - I'm Conrad!
Don't shoot that in here!
"Don't panic!" said Baron, "There's nothing to fear!"
There in the parlor I fought for my life.
The League stood there boggled at this gruesome strife.
Steam packs were seized, and cussing ensued,
while Lady chastised us for being so crude.
We fired our weapons, our steam, and our stakes, silver bullets,
holy water, but the monsters were fake.
It was only our neighbors dressed up
as a prank. They came over to scare us,
our chains for to yank.
We swept up the china, and had a good laugh,
shut down the rose, and gave zombie a bath,
then trundled upstairs, and tucked in JayAre,
had a stiff brandy, and puffed a cigar.
As we drifted to sleep, a soft voice did recite,
"Steamy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"
HAPPY HOLIDAYS; A LEAGUE OF S.T.E.A.M. PRODUCTION