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Midnight Cooking
Anatomy Lesson
Good evening everyone,
it's time for Midnight Cooking.
Our lesson tonight is anatomy.
Which parts of the body taste best
that will be our topic for today.
As opposed to cows, the human body has a lot of
tough tendons which are difficult to cook.
Tendons can at most be made into soup and appetizers,
so the main course for today has to be the innards!
In other words, horumon. (Grilled innards)
Let's prepare the liver raw.
The liver of a 50 year old middle-aged man,
who goes drinking every day after work
will certainly taste best.
Especially the ones who already know
their favorite bars and drinking spots.
Make sure to investigate about what kind of bars he frequents,
including the personalities and family backgrounds
of the bartenders working there.
If he's the type that goes home to drink,
that is really not good.
Never drink slowly at home like a drunkard.
However, the strong willed type
who makes a "Dry Day" once a week
during which he does not drink is okay.
However, if you don't have time to investigate,
look at him and judge his complexion,
and say, sickly people shouldn't drink anymore, okay?
O-KA-Y?
Next are the lungs.
Sadly, the lungs of a smoker
are completely inedible.
Especially the ones who say, "I'm currently quitting"
once every three months to everyone he meets.
Don't 'befriend' this type of person, okay?
If you want to smoke, smoke.
If you don't want to, don't.
Make up your mind.
After that would be the intestines
Human intestines are about the same as pig intestines.
Intestines can be made into gourmet sausages, but
the problem with it is the intestinal folds.
"It is said that when stretched,
the folds of a man's intestines can cover a whole tennis field."
Tell the stuck-up people who like to say this sort of trivia,
"So what, does it make you a genius?"
Even my grandmother's wrinkles
can be stretched to cover a whole tatami mat.
And now for the cut of the highest quality,
the part we all are familiar with, the brain.
It is very easy to be addicted to the brain.
When choosing which brain to cook,
educational backgrounds are totally not important.
Which university he graduated from,
whether he has studied overseas,
which company he is working in,
these kind of things, are utterly unimportant.
None of these things determine a person's value (and taste).
The other parts of the body are best cut up
and cooked together as a stew
Seasoning with salt and miso will suffice.
However, there is one thing you need to be careful of:
a person's feelings.
Don't let your feelings get in the way of cooking him.
Alright. Shall we begin the cooking process now?
Lying here is Miyoshi-san.
He will be our main ingredient today.
I'm proud to say, he's still alive.
Although it is very cruel,
I will start cutting Miyoshi-san up now.
Due to the excessive cruelty displayed, we are unable to show this scene.