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I've got the swagger of a million
bragging like I killed a dragon
with a silver dagger, stabbed it
where the heart is to extract a
little shard of pure awesome
found the greatest word artists
in the world, past or present,
went the farthest in the TARDIS
got lessons from Basho
but the left toe of the Bard,
a bit of Shel Silverstein's liver,
and a kidney stone of Nas's
and a bunch of other stuff from other
people less famous,
but no less great,
that's just not the way the game is
played. Anyway, put it all in a pot,
stirred with a pegasus feather,
burner set hot,
and distilled the potion into a potent
pill of pure word power.
And now I take one every half hour.
In my blood, the chemicals of
rapping are reacting,
and flooding to my fingertips
with capillary action,
to where the magic happens;
to where I grab a pen
and paper, and make words, and hope
that you don't laugh at them.
But I'm on my Samuel L. Jackson
my gratuitous badass and ludicrous passion:
I make GOOD music, I'm not Yeezy signed,
I just make good music, don't need to be redefined
so baba baba ba, there is no one like me
you can talk all you want but it's not likely
that you'll ever be or even ever see
an MC that can be meaner on this beat
than me. You wrote this? It's so sick!
Yeah, I get that a lot.
It's dope ***! Don't quit!
I'll keep making music, like basically forever
and I'll never get famous, which is just whatever.
No, *** that noise, I'm a superstar.
I am fated to make it (yeah, sure you are)
So I won't stop till I'm blowing up overseas
and blowing up ovaries.
I got love for the honeys and ***!
Not as much as for peanut butter and honey sandwiches, though
because that *** sure is delicious.
Don't know me? Well, you'll know me by the chorus, which is:
I'm hardcore like Samuel L. Jackson.
I'm badass like Samuel L. Jackson.
I got swag like Samuel L. Jackson
and I always play myself;
Samuel L. Jackson.
I'm hardcore like Samuel L. Jackson.
I'm badass like Samuel L. Jackson.
I got swag like Samuel L. Jackson
and I always play myself;
Samuel L. Jackson.
Samuel L. Jackson.
I know swag's dead, but I've still got it anyway.
Watsky sez, gotta fit a label to fit a label
but even if you stay unsigned, people are going to make you
into a word, a concept, familiar
and group you together with everybody vaguely similar.
Not just musicians get simplified to symbols
squished down until you could fit inside a thimble
but *** that ***. The box's too tiny.
I ball so hard *** can't define me.
'Cause I'm me: yeah, I'm all about my business
killing all these rappers like I'm rapidly unwrapping a stack of packaged gifts off my
Christmas wishlist
All about ripping through these *** like a bris is.
That's circumcision, if Gentiles miss this
Good luck getting rid of those mental images.
Now drop the beat, and get dramatic before I have to go
and hit you in the face with the bass like Haruko
I'm hardcore like Samuel L. Jackson
If you want more, wait for the next track to come
I make a new sick one every maybe six months
I'm lazy and this crazy mind of mine gets sidetracked some- times, my rhymes come slow,
I'm obviously on some melancholy lethargic Andrei Tarkovsky ***.
Was that too obscure? Sorry. Well I'm balling when I'm rolling like a *** Katamari
Yeah, it's back to the nerdy flow; that's the only words I know
I would prefer to go to where I get vertigo
So Samuel L. Jackson on this *** track, son, I got racks on racks on racks,
that's what they say in all the rap songs, right? But he's that nerdy guy, isn't he?
The truth resists simplicity, it's proof you weren't listening
As a matter of fact, these are not parody raps
Like Supervillainous to me was super serious, you see?
It's all me, even the contradictions, 'cause people are not simple. So stop and listen.
You want to know who I am in a word?
Well, I'll tell you again, but you already heard
I'm hardcore like Samuel L. Jackson.
I'm badass like Samuel L. Jackson.
I got swag like Samuel L. Jackson
and I always play myself;
Samuel L. Jackson.
Samuel L. Jackson.
Samuel L. Jackson.
Samuel L. Jackson.
Samuel L. Jackson.
Alright alright alright, enough is enough. I have had it with these *** fakes
in this *** game
I'm on my greatest rapper in history
My Jules Winnfield, Mace Windu, Nick Fury,
Zeus Carver, the dude from Jurassic Park, go harder than anybody ever. Nah, I'm not
that clever.
I'm not anything special let's be honest.
I'm fishing for compliments, stick them in the comments
Yeah I'm constantly awesome, I never forget
I'm the elephant of excellence, you better respect
And oh yeah, I'm real, oh yeah, I'm so real
but real is just a thing you are to try to get a deal
and real is just a term for a certain kind of person
when he does anything, he's sure that he's the first one
Trend-setting everything, ahead of the curve, all evidence purged of any mainstream thought
Brag about how many haters you've got, talk about how much you don't give a *** about
them a *** lot
which I guess is better than copying street cred
Claiming to be hard and *** what Mobb Deep said
But if you're being different or aping the traditional
Trying to be original just isn't original
And making a song and saying "this is me"
Like who you really are fits on an mp3
Always claiming realness just doesn't seem honest
So *** being yourself, be whoever you want
Pull a Ziggy Stardust; It's not who you are, but so what? Own a persona, as long as you
know it
and is it true? well, it was when you wrote it
You know, to be so legit you don't need to act over it
Like the guy who's over the top, but not ironically
He's funny as hell, but doesn't do comedies
He'd never descend to self-referential mockery
He's Samuel L. Jackson, and he's exactly who he wants to be
And I'm me. On my badass Sammy Jack or am I a nerd, pulling words from a *** pack?
Or am I all of that? A walking paradox
Thoughts you couldn't process at a hundred teraflops
Did I mention I'm pretentious?
But I promise to rock this till I'm in dentures
And I'll practice my craft like I'm indentured
Apprentice with no master, asking for a mentor
Because I kind of suck, and I'm kind of awesome
So either way I'm always being honest
No matter what I say, so if you don't mind, I'd prefer to just remind you that I'm
Hardcore like Samuel L. Jackson
I'm badass like Samuel L. Jackson.
I got swag like Samuel L. Jackson
and I always play myself; Samuel L. Jackson.