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Abdelkarim
Do you distance yourself from the attacks?
From which attack?
You know exactly which attack we are talking about
The one on the 7th of January
The attack with many victims or the one with much compassion?
What do you mean?
On the 7th of January 34 people were killed by an explosion in Yemen
Then we mean the one with much compassion
Do you distance yourself from Paris?
I'm from Bielefeld, 700km away, it's far enough
We don't mean it geographically... we mean it... like... humanly
But why specifically me? Why should I distance myself?
Well... you are...
Yea?
Come on... you... you...
A German?
No, you are a practicing...
Comic!
No!
You are a mm... Muslim!
Yes, I'm a German Muslim comic
Aren't you rather a comical (strange, odd) German Muslim?
The attackers in Paris were also Muslims
But the victims were also comics
Yes, but it doesn't matter...
We aren't saying that every Muslim is a terrorist
But almost every terrorist is a Muslim, interesting isn't it?
The policeman was also Muslim
and the worker in the supermarket, the one who saved Jews
he was a Muslim as well
Yea...eh... what do these noble deeds have to do with Islam?
Was it even consistent with the Quran?
Well... I don't know...
Besides, the hero from the supermarket isn't a Muslim anymore but a Frenchman
How does it generally work?
Must I distance myself from each terrorist attack separately...
... or can I also do it in bulk?
Oh... I think, you can also do it in bulk...
Yea... maybe renew every few years
Yea, like with vaccinations
Have you already distanced yourself from ISIS, as a matter of fact?
So if some fanatics misinterpret my religion...
... in order to create a terror-state ...
... must I distance myself?
Actually, what about you?
Have you distanced yourself from Breivik?
What...? Breivik?
Breivik is a self-proclaimed Christian cross saviour...
... and you are Christians aren't you?
I am an atheist, thank God
But you Mr. Wagner... you are a Chrisitan, right?
Yea... moderately...
well... no
well... not a church-goer, in this sense...
maybe once for Chirstmas
and the kids like the flea markets too...
This is a nice story, but what about the Christian fundamentalists?
For example, in the US four abortion doctors were murdered in the last years
Sure, but they wanted to protect life
Yea well... the unborn life...
... the born life not so much
Yea, ok
There are always... let's say... lone wolves, who are mentally ill...
... but there are no Christian terror militia
What about Kony?
Who?
Yes, Joseph Kony, moves with his army since 2006 through Uganda...
... kidnaps children, rapes women... he has massacred thousands of people with machetes
What does this have to do with Christianity?
Well, Kony wants to create a God's state based on the Ten Commandments
He is Christian?
He is a christianist
Ok, you see... just because few fanatics misinterpret my religion...
... in order to create a terror-state...
... I don't have to distance myself
(laughter) I have heard it somewhere already!
Ah, and you? Have you distanced yourself already?
What should I distance myself from, then?
[Saxonian accent] Then think a little harder Mrs. Solga
So, I should distance myself from PEGIDA...
... just because I happened to be born in Saxony?
You... You are all men...
... there you go, the worst crimes are committed by men...
... have you distanced yourselves already?
Mrs. Solga, just because a few million men in the world...
... kill, plunder...
... ***, ***...
... don't take the parental leave...
Oh yes! That's right!
Just because some fanatics act out their manhood in a wrong way...
... I don't have to distance myself from my gender (pointing at his genitals)
You are Germans, aren't you?
Yeaaa
Have you distanced yourselves from the NSU (National Socialist Underground) murders?
Mr. Abdel, you are a German as well...
Yea, yea
Then you must also distance yourself from the NSU
Oh, come on... what we are doing is absurd...
Yea, it's absurd...
Just because individuals commit crimes...
... we put whole groups under general suspicion
We don't do this at Die Anstalt (name of the show, meaning insitution)
Nobody is sidelined here...
... neither the Saxonians...
... nor the Muslims ...
... nor men ...
... nor Uthoffs (name of the co-moderator)
This is our response to Paris...
... Islam belongs in Germany...
... and Abdelkarim belongs in Die Anstalt
Nous sommes Abdelkarim