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HERE IN ALASKA,
HUNTING FOR FOOD IS PART OF OUR HISTORY AND CULTURE.
BUT KEEP IN MIND, HUNTING CAN BE DANGEROUS.
BE CAREFUL. AND REMEMBER, SAFETY FIRST.
THERE WE GO!
WHERE DO WE FIND THESE PEOPLE?
SHE'S BEEN WORKING AT WILD WEST,
BUT WE DON'T HAVE ANY HOURS FOR HER.
WE ARE EXPECTING A VERY FAMOUS ALASKAN
AND INCREDIBLE MARKSWOMAN.
LET'S GO TO LINE ONE. COREY, IS THIS YOU?
It is me.
YAY!
I'M FURIOUS. WHEN YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE TAKING A CREW,
YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU WERE TAKING MY CREW.
COME TO PAPA.
IF THEY WERE TURKEYS, YOU WOULD'VE ALREADY GOT ONE.
Jim: ALASKA -- TRULY THE LAST FRONTIER.
A PLACE WHERE YOU DON'T GO TO THE GROCERY STORE,
YOU GO HUNTING, AND THAT'S WHERE WE COME IN.
COOL GUN ALERT!
GOOD MORNING, HANS-Y!
WE HAVE AN OLD SAYING --
THE ODDS ARE GOOD, BUT THE GOODS ARE ODD.
I GUESS YOU CAN SAY THAT ABOUT US, TOO.
YEE-HAW!
MY NAME'S JIM WEST, THE OWNER OF WILD WEST GUNS.
AND THIS IS MY CREW.
Ken: CHECK OUT WHAT MY GENIUS HAS ACHIEVED.
Phred: I MAKE THIS LOOK EASY.
GOOD SHOT, PHRED!
Bryan: THERE ISN'T A GUN THAT I CAN'T BUILD.
[ BUZZING ]
Mitch: I'LL SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE.
Hans: OH, JASPER, WE STRUCK OUT AGAIN.
[ JASPER WHINES ]
Jim: THERE ARE GUNS,
AND THEN THERE ARE WILD WEST GUNS.
-- Captions by VITAC -- www.vitac.com
CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS
GOOD MORNING, EVERYBODY.
IT'S 6:31 ON A BEAUTIFUL, UH, TUESDAY MORNING
HERE IN ANCHORAGE, ALASKA. WE'VE GOT OUR BUDDIES
YES.
UH, ACTUALLY, OUR BUDDIES COULDN'T SHOW UP,
EXACTLY.
HOW ARE YOU DOING, BUDDY?
AND OF COURSE, MI--
[ Singsongy ] MITCH?
A LITTLE EARLY IN THE MORNING FOR HIM.
DO ME A FAVOR.
PUT A MIRROR UNDER HIS NOSE. SEE IF HE'S BREATHING.
WE ARE EXPECTING
A VERY IMPORTANT CALL FROM A WONDERFUL WOMAN.
A FAMOUS ALASKAN
AND INCREDIBLE MARKSMAN, MARKSWOMAN?
YEAH, MARKSMAN.
A GREAT SHOT, OKAY?
COREY COGDELL'S GONNA BE CALLING IN.
LET'S TALK TO HER.
ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO TO LINE ONE. COREY, IS THIS YOU?
It is me. How are you doing?
All: YAY!
HOW ARE YOU?
[ Chuckles ] I'm doing great. How are you guys?
UH, WE ARE FINE AS FROGS HERE.
WE'RE HANGING OUT HERE
WITH THE -- WITH THE DUDES FROM WILD WEST GUNS.
LUCKILY, ONE OF THEM IS WIDE AWAKE
AND WANTS TO TALK TO YOU THIS MORNING.
COREY, SWEETHEART, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN? IT'S BEEN AGES.
Hey, Ken. How are you? [ Laughs ]
I'M STILL LOOKING GOOD.
I-I know that's the truth.
COREY AND WILD WEST GUNS -- WE GO WAY BACK.
HER DAD USED TO COME IN AND BUY GUNS ALL THE TIME.
HE'D DRAG HER ALONG. SHE'S LIKE FAMILY.
LISTEN, UM, YOU'RE COMING BACK INTO TOWN, ARE YA?
I am, yeah.
Actually, I have a little project
that I need your help with.
WHAT KIND OF PROJECT IS THAT GONNA BE?
Well, I have this, uh, old .22, one of the --
actually, the first gun that I ever shot --
RIVERTON .22?
HOLD ON. MITCH IS AWAKE. [ LAUGHS ]
WELL, YOU GUYS WANTED TO FINALLY TALK GUNS, SO I'M HERE.
They're waking up. All right.
ALL RIGHT, SO YOU'RE TALKING
ABOUT THIS .22 THAT YOU HAVE, RIGHT?
It's this old .22, and it's, uh,
it's a little bit worse for wear,
but, uh, I'm hoping you guys can clean it up for me,
and, uh, maybe even get it ready
so I can go hunting with it while I'm home.
WELL, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. YOU BRING THE GUN IN,
AND I WILL MAKE SURE THAT IT IS TAKEN CARE OF,
AND I WILL DO THAT PERSONALLY. I'LL PERSONALLY --
Well, that'd be awesome.
I look forward to seeing you guys again.
WAIT A SECOND.
IF KEN IS PERSONALLY GONNA MAKE SURE THIS GUN IS FIXED,
THEN ANYBODY BUT KEN IS GONNA WORK ON THIS GUN.
EXACTLY. I'M PERSONALLY GONNA --
All right. Never a dull moment with you guys, that's for sure.
YOU ARE THE GREATEST.
WE'RE SO PROUD OF YOU FOR REPRESENTING ALASKA.
DOING SO GREAT.
WE'LL TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR GUN.
Well, thank you, guys. Good to talk to you guys.
And hopefully, we'll see y'all soon.
WE'LL SEE YOU VERY SOON, COREY. THANKS AGAIN.
THANKS, COREY.
ALL RIGHT. WE'VE GOT TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
IT'S, UH, THE BOB AND MARK RADIO PROGRAM
ON ALASKA'S ROCK 106.5, KWHL. YOU GUYS ARE WEIRD.
US?
[ WHISTLES ]
WHAT'S UP, KENNY?
HOW YOU DOING THERE, DUDE?
YOU SEEN HANS ANYWHERE?
I'VE GOT AN ORDER I NEED HIS HELP WITH.
I HAVE NO IDEA. YOU KNOW, IT'S ALMOST NOON.
HE SHOULD BE SHOWING UP.
BANKER'S HOURS, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
PERFECT TIMING.
I'VE BEEN BUSY.
FIXING THE BOAT.
OH, YOU'RE GETTING THE BOAT ALL READY, HUH?
FOR DIP NETTIN'.
DIP NET FISHING IN THE KENAI RIVER
IS ONE OF THE UNIQUE ALASKA TRADITIONS.
ALASKANS CAN GO DROP THEIR NETS IN THE RIVER
WHENEVER THE FISH ARE RUNNING, CERTAIN TIMES OF THE YEAR,
AND JUST SCOOP UP HORDES AND HORDES OF FISH,
AND ONLY ALASKANS CAN DO THAT. IT IS BEYOND AWESOME.
YOU GET 'EM RIGHT OUT OF THE SALT WATER.
YOU CAN GO DOWN AND GET 25 FISH TO PUT IN YOUR FREEZER
FOR THE WINTER WITHOUT HAVING TO GO TO THE STORE.
WELL, I'M GOING DIP NETTIN' THIS WEEKEND.
YOU BET.
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN.
I'VE NEVER BEEN BEFORE.
CHASE, YOU'VE BEEN LIVING IN ALASKA YOUR ENTIRE LIFE.
WELCOME TO THE CREW.
ALL RIGHT, COOL.
SO WHEN ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BE GOING ON THIS TRIP, HANS?
SATURDAY A.M.
SATURDAY?
WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE WORKING HERE ON SATURDAY.
JIM'S GOT US ON THE SCHEDULE.
YOU KNOW HOW JIM IS. FORGET IT. DONE. FINISHED.
NO DIP NETTING THIS YEAR.
I GOT IT. THERE'S NO PROBLEM.
YOU'RE NOT GONNA CONVINCE HIM.
I'M GOING, AND YOU GUYS ARE GOING.
AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN.
YOU WATCH.
HEY, JIM.
HANSY, WHAT'S UP?
OH, I WANTED TO, UH, GO GET SOME REDS.
IT'S GOOD DIP NETTIN' RIGHT NOW,
SO...I WANT TO GET, UH...SATURDAY OFF.
AGAIN?
YOU KNOW, I SWEAR ELVIS SHOWS UP
MORE AROUND HERE THAN YOU DO ON SATURDAY ANYMORE.
[ Laughs ] I'VE GOT THE CREW ALL LINED UP READY TO GO.
I'LL BRING A BUNCH OF FISH BACK.
YOU KNOW I ALWAYS DO.
WELL, AS LONG AS I'VE GOT CREW HERE TO RUN THE SHOP AND STUFF.
YEAH, I'M SURE YOU WILL.
AS LONG AS I HAVE THE REST OF MY GUYS WORKING,
I'M FINE WITH HANS TAKING THE DAY OFF.
BUT I'D BETTER GET A LOT OF FISH OUT OF THIS.
YEAH, YOU'LL HAVE, UH, PLENTY OF FISH WHEN I'M DONE.
YEAH. WELL, MAKE SURE MINE'S SMOKED AND VACUUM-PACKED.
IT WILL. IT'LL BE PROFESSIONALLY DONE.
[ HUMMING SOFTLY ]
YO, HOMESTYLE. WHAT ARE YOU CHORTLING ABOUT?
WE'RE GONNA GO DIP NETTIN'?
HOW'D YOU PULL THAT ONE?
PUTTY?
EASY.
I GOT TO GIVE HIM SOME SMOKED FISH, THOUGH.
I'VE WORKED FOR JIM FOR 16 YEARS,
AND I'VE NEVER KNOWN HIM TO GIVE HALF THE OFFICE A DAY OFF.
VERY, VERY STRANGE.
I CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT'S GOING ON HERE,
BUT...WHAT DO I CARE? I GOT A SATURDAY OFF.
I'M GOING DIP NETTING. [ Pops lip ] I'M OUTTA HERE.
I'LL GO GET SOME CARDBOARD
AND MAKE UP A "GONE FISHIN'" SIGN.
BAM. WE'RE OUTTA HERE.
YOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT EVERYBODY IN THE SHOP.
HAVE YOU TALKED TO MITCH YET?
UH, YEP. I HEARD STORIES ABOUT, LIKE,
THE 1800s, 1700s. [ LAUGHS ]
I WISH I COULD WORK MORE.
PHRED IS NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS GUNS AROUND HERE.
I JUST REALLY WISH THEY'D GIVE ME MORE HOURS.
WE COULD TRY AND GET YOU SOME MORE HOURS.
KEN.
SO HE COULD TALK TO JIM. WE'LL JUST GO IN THERE,
AND I'LL JUST TELL HIM THAT YOU NEED MORE HOURS.
YEAH. THAT'S WHAT I USUALLY DO.
YEAH.
WE'LL DO IT AFTER LUNCH.
OKAY.
[ PAPER RUSTLING ]
WHERE'S THE GARBAGE PAIL?
WHAT ARE YOU GETTING ALL CLEANY FOR?
COREY'S COMING BY. SHE'S AN OLYMPIC MEDALIST, DUDE.
THE PLACE SHOULD LOOK GOOD.
COREY IS A REAL BIG DEAL AROUND TOWN,
AND WE ARE REALLY LUCKY TO HAVE HER COME VISIT.
WHAT IS THIS THING?
THAT'S CALLED THE HANSY MIX. BOOM, BOOM, BOOM.
[ Sighs ] I'LL BOOM, BOOM, BOOM YOU.
HEY, GUYS.
YOU WERE FAST.
GROOVY.
I BROUGHT THAT GUN IN I WAS TALKING ABOUT.
WELL, THERE YOU GO.
SO THIS IS AN OLD .22
THAT'S GOT A LOT OF ROUNDS THROUGH IT.
GOT SOME WEAR AND TEAR ON IT,
BUT I'M HOPING THAT I CAN TAKE IT OUT HUNTING AGAIN.
YEAH, IT'S PRETTY MUCH A RUST BUCKET.
COME ON, NOW. IT'S JUST WELL-USED.
THAT -- THAT'S SO MEAN. SHE'S AN OLYMPIAN.
WHY ARE YOU INSULTING AN OLYMPIAN'S GUN?
WELL, WE'LL GET IT FIXED UP FOR YOU.
YOU'RE SO MEAN.
WELL, LET'S TAKE THIS IN THE BACK
AND SHOW IT TO THE BOYS. COME ON BACK AND SAY HI TO THE BOYS.
YEAH, I WANT TO SEE THE GUYS.
COME ON BACK. THEY'D LOVE TO SEE YOU.
THANK YOU.
YOU -- YOU GOT THE SCREWS FOR THOSE?
Ken: YO, BOYS, BOYS.
REAL SHOOTER IN THE HOUSE.
HEY, COREY.
THIS IS MISS ONCE IN A WHILE,
MISS MOST OF THE TIME, AND MISS ALWAYS.
HEY, JIM. HOW ARE YOU?
WELL, I'VE GOT THIS OLD 10/22.
I REALLY WANT TO TAKE IT OUT HUNTING.
WHAT ARE YOU GOING HUNTING FOR?
I'M GONNA GO HUNT SOME PTARMIGAN.
PTARMIGAN, THE SMALLEST MEMBER OF THE GROUSE FAMILY
AND A WHOLE LOT OF FUN TO GO HUNTIN'.
WE WERE THINKING ABOUT DOING SOME PTARMIGAN HUNTING.
I DON'T KNOW.
CAN YOU GUYS HIT ANYTHING?
[ LAUGHING ]
I THINK IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA. REALLY.
WE COULD HAVE, LIKE, TEAMS.
WELL, I THINK THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
COME ON, COREY. LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
LET THESE GUYS DISCUSS THE GUN. WE'LL FIGURE OUT THE HUNT.
ALL RIGHT, GUYS. THAT GUN'S PRETTY IMPORTANT TO ME.
TRUST YOU'LL TAKE CARE OF IT.
COREY ISN'T JUST A CUSTOMER.
THAT GIRL'S FAMILY. WHEN IT COMES TO HER GUN,
I REALLY WANT THE GUYS TO GO THE EXTRA MILE.
THANKS, GUYS.
[ BUZZING ]
HEY, BRYAN.
YEAH, MITCH?
WHAT'S UP WITH THE 10/22?
OH, COREY'S GUN? KIND OF ROUGH.
[ Chuckles ] YEAH.
NO.
I WAS THINKING YOU COULD PUT A, UH, TRIGGER GROOVE
AND, YOU KNOW, GET HER A BULL BARREL
PUT ON THERE FOR BETTER ACCURACY.
YEAH. WE CAN PUT A MUZZLE BRAKE ON,
GO AHEAD AND CHANGE THE STOCK OUT.
YEAH. YOU COULD GET HER ONE OF THOSE LAMINATE STOCKS.
I'D SAY YOU SHOULD -- OUGHT TO ORDER ONE OF THOSE, UH,
HOW COME I KEEP ON HEARING "YOU"
WHEN I'M SAYING "WE?"
WELL, HANS INVITED ME TO GO DOWN
AND GO DIP NETTING WITH HIM.
AHA!
SO I'M GONNA GO DOWN THERE AND GO DO THAT,
AND I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
TO MAKE IT UP TO YOU, I'LL BRING YOU
A COUPLE OF SMOKED SALMON FILETS.
NICE, BIG ONE?
I DON'T MIND WORKING ON AN OLYMPIAN'S GUN,
AND IF I GET SOME SALMON OUT OF IT, ALL THE BETTER.
SOUND LIKE A PLAN TO YOU?
OKAY, YEAH. I CAN -- I CAN WORK WITH THAT.
[ CLICKING ]
AS LONG AS IT'S SMOKED
SURE.
I'M GONNA ANSWER THE PHONE.
WHAT'S UP?
[ Singsongy ] HI.
LARRY NEEDS MORE HOURS.
ARE YOU HAVING A PLEASANT DAY?
I NEED MORE HOURS.
MORE HOURS? THAT MEANS MORE MONEY.
I KNOW YOU DO, SWEETHEART, BUT YOU KNOW HOW JIM IS.
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE DOING GREAT,
BUT YOU'RE NOT QUITE THAT GREAT YET
WHERE I CAN CONVINCE HIM TO GIVE YOU MORE.
I'M NOT QUITE THAT GREAT?
SHE SOLD MORE GUNS THAN YOU LAST WEEK.
THAT'S NOT MY JOB TO SELL GUNS.
IT'S MY JOB TO SUPERVISE THE SELLING OF GUNS.
I WILL TALK TO HIM.
I WILL NOT GUARANTEE SUCCESS THOUGH, OKAY?
JIM IS A VERY BUSY GUY,
AND I'M NOT EVEN GONNA BUG HIM WITH THIS.
I'M GONNA MAKE THE EXECUTIVE DECISION.
SORRY, LADIES. NO EXTRA HOURS FOR LARRY.
YOU'RE AS GOOD AS PHRED.
[ SNICKERS ]
NOTHING.
I JUST HAD A LITTLE FROG IN MY THROAT.
I THINK IT'S TIME WE TAKE THAT OTHER HALF-HOUR
OF OUR HOUR LUNCH.
I AGREE.
BYE, GUYS.
♪♪♪
♪♪♪
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE SO EARLY THIS MORNING?
I GUESS WE'RE GOING DIP NETTING.
I'VE NEVER BEEN DIP NETTING BEFORE.
[ Chuckles ] WE'RE BREAKING HIM IN.
NICE.
HE DOESN'T REALIZE THAT, YOU KNOW, IF A FISH, LIKE,
YOU KNOW, GETS OUT OF HIS NET, HE'S GOT TO DIVE IN AFTER IT.
IS THAT EGGS ON PANCAKES?
HOLY CRAP.
AND THIS, DUDE, THIS IS FOOD OF THE GODS.
YEAH.
[ Mouth full ] NO, IT'S GOOD.
WATCHING KEN AND HANS EAT,
IT'S LIKE WATCHING TWO BEARS FIGHT OVER FOOD --
TWO REALLY OLD BEARS WITH REALLY TERRIBLE TABLE MANNERS.
[ GRUNTS ]
I'M DONE.
LET'S GET IT.
LET'S GO.
MA'AM, COULD YOU GIVE THE TAB TO THE GUY AT THE END? COME ON.
YEAH.
TAKE CARE OF IT FOR ME, WILL YOU, BUDDY? OKAY.
LET THE WORKOUT BEGIN.
THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU'RE THE NEW KID ON THE BLOCK.
KEN WON'T GIVE LARRY ANY MORE HOURS,
SO I KNOW JUST THE PLACE TO TAKE HER.
HEY! AH, YOU GRACE ME WITH YOUR PRESENCE.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
LADIES WITH MAN NAMES.
ANOTHER CATEGORY IN "JEOPARDY!"
WELL, WHAT'S UP?
UM, SHE'S BEEN WORKING AT WILD WEST,
BUT WE DON'T HAVE ANY HOURS FOR HER.
SO I WAS GONNA SEE
IF, UM, IF YOU HAD ANY.
YOU KNOW, I ACTUALLY COULD USE ANOTHER HAND AROUND HERE,
SO LET'S DO A QUICK JOB INTERVIEW.
OKAY.
UH, WHAT TYPE OF ACTION IS THIS GUN HERE?
SO THAT'S A RUGER BLACKHAWK. LOOKS ABOUT, UH, A .41 MAGNUM.
SO, SINGLE-ACTION.
YEP. ABSOLUTELY.
WHEN A GUY COMES IN
GOING INTO BEAR COUNTRY FOR BACKPACKING,
UH, A .44 MAGNUM.
NOT A 12-GAUGE?
SHOTGUN'S NOT GONNA BE THAT EASY TO CARRY OUT HIKING.
HMM.
SO I'D DEFINITELY GO WITH THE .44.
OKAY. I THINK THIS WILL WORK,
BECAUSE, NUMBER ONE, YOU'RE PRETTY.
NUMBER TWO, YOU'RE PRETTY.
THREE, YOU KNOW GUNS,
AND FOUR, JIM'S ALREADY TRAINED YA. [ LAUGHS ]
[ BOTH CHUCKLE ]
OKAY, SURE.
OKAY, SOUNDS GOOD.
COOL. THANK YOU.
AND "DARLIN'" IS NOT *** HARASSMENT.
I ALREADY CHECKED THAT.
[ LAUGHS ]
[ Under breath ] WHAT?
MITCH, WHERE IS EVERYBODY?
DIDN'T YOU GIVE 'EM THE DAY OFF?
THAT'S WHAT HANS TOLD ME.
NO, I DIDN'T GIVE 'EM THE DAY OFF.
I GAVE HANS THE DAY OFF.
I GUESS.
WE GOT WORK TO DO AROUND HERE! WHAT THE HE--
HOLY [bleep]. GLAD I'M NOT HIM.
Hans: IT'S A PERFECT DAY FOR DIP NETTING.
AND THE SUN IS OUT. THE RIVER'S CALM.
WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO GET JIM A TON OF FISH.
I'VE NEVER BEEN OUT HERE IN A BOAT BEFORE.
DID YOU RIDE A BICYCLE OUT HERE OR WHAT?
[ LAUGHTER ]
HEY, WHAT ARE THOSE BIG RED THINGS
FLOATING AROUND OUT THERE?
IF YOU USE ENOUGH GEL, YOUR HAIR DOESN'T EVEN MOVE.
WHERE DO WE USE THE BATHROOM?
IS THERE, LIKE, SOMEWHERE WE CAN PULL IN
FOR, LIKE, TACOS OR SOMETHING?
MY NIPPLES ARE GETTING PERKY.
I WONDER IF I'VE GOT 4G OUT HERE.
CHASE IS LIKE THE ANNOYING LITTLE BROTHER
IN THE BACKSEAT OF A CAR DURING A FAMILY VACATION.
"ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET?
ARE WE THERE YET?"
I GOT TO TELL ALL MY FACEBOOK FRIENDS
THAT I'M OUT ON THE RIVER.
OH, JEEZ!
I'VE GOT TO INSTAGRAM THIS.
I'M GONNA THROW YOU OVERBOARD, DUDE.
[ CHUCKLES ]
JIM WANTED US TO DO SOMETHING SPECIAL TO COREY'S GUN.
SO I'M GONNA START OUT WITH A TRIGGER JOB,
A MAG RELEASE CATCH,
EXTENDED BOLT HANDLE, AND A FIBER-WRAPPED BARREL.
COREY'S AN ALASKA GIRL. I'M GONNA MAKE THIS THING
EASY FOR HER TO OPERATE WITH GLOVES ON.
Hans: OKAY, GET NETS OUT.
Jim: COME ON. LET'S GO TO WORK, YOU GUYS.
GET THE NETS IN THE WATER.
THAT'S THE ONLY WAY WE'RE CATCHING FISH HERE.
DO YOU FEEL BOTTOM AT ALL, BRYAN?
OKAY.
WHEN YOU'RE DIP NETTING,
YOU WANT TO KEEP YOUR NET JUST OFF THE BOTTOM.
YOU'RE TOO LOW, YOU'LL TEAR YOUR NET UP.
YOU'RE TOO HIGH, THE FISH WILL GO RIGHT UNDERNEATH IT.
SO, HANS, HOW DID YOU GET US OUT OF WORK TODAY?
I'M NOT CHIEF NEGOTIATOR FOR NOTHING.
HOW DO I KNOW IF THERE'S A FISH IN THERE?
YOU'LL FEEL HIM.
Ken: IT'S GONNA ANNOUNCE ITSELF TO YOU.
Bryan: IT'S GONNA START WIGGLING AND THRASHING.
Hans: MIGHT BE STARTING TO COME IN.
Bryan: YEAH, I THINK SO.
ALL RIGHT. YOU GUYS NEED TO CATCH A FISH, 'CAUSE I'M BORED.
I'M GONNA HAVE TO GO SEE MY MASSEUSE AFTER THIS.
SHE'S GREAT.
WHERE DO WE FIND THESE PEOPLE?
JUST GET -- GET A FISH, FOR GOD SAKES.
Chase: OH, THERE WE GO.
YOU GOT TO PINCH IT OFF!
THEY'LL SWIM RIGHT BACK
OUT OF THE GOSH-DARNED NET!
WHY ARE PEOPLE CATCHING FISH BEHIND US AND IN FRONT OF US?
Bryan: CHASE HAS GOT A HOLE IN HIS NET.
Ken: OH, THERE'S A FISH! THERE WE GO.
I DON'T EVEN HAVE MY GLOVES ON!
OH!
I PROMISED JIM A FRIDGE FULL OF FISH.
IF WE DON'T START CATCHING SOME SALMON,
WE'RE GONNA CATCH HELL WHEN WE GO BACK TO THE OFFICE.
OH, THERE WE GO!
I THINK IT WAS THE BOTTOM.
YEAH. IF THERE WERE FISH HERE, I WOULD'VE GOTTEN THEM ALREADY.
THIS IS NOT LOOKING GOOD.
OH, [bleep]!
I DON'T KNOW IF THIS IS THE BOTTOM OR A FISH.
WHOA, JEEZ! COME ON, GET IT IN THE BUCKET!
♪♪♪
♪♪♪
CHASE, IF THE NET ISN'T IN THE WATER, WE'RE NOT FISHING.
THESE CLOWNS HAVE BEEN AT IT FOR HOURS,
AND WE HAVE NOTHING TO SHOW FOR IT.
Ken: GET A FISH, FOR GOD SAKES.
Hans: WAIT UNTIL WE START HITTING 'EM.
THERE WE GO!
Ken: YEAH.
YEAH!
THERE WE GO! HE'S GOT A FISH!
THERE IT IS. GET IT IN, GET IT IN!
WATCH YOUR HEAD!
Ken: COME HERE. BRING THAT BABY OVER HERE.
THERE WE GO, THERE WE GO.
I GOT HIM.
FINALLY, THE RIVER'S COUGHING UP SOME FISH.
EVEN THE NEWBIE, CHASE, CAUGHT A SALMON.
Hans: FINALLY BROKE THE ICE, CHASE!
YEAH.
HEAD SHOT.
NICE SHOT, KID.
IF WE KEEP CATCHING 'EM AT THIS RATE,
WE'LL BE EATING SMOKED SALMON TILL NEXT SEASON.
GOOD JOB! NOW PICK THE PACE UP.
[ CALLING ]
LAST LITTLE...
IT'S NICE AND QUIET. NOBODY AROUND.
CAN GET SOMETHING DONE. YEAH. SPEED RIFLE WITH A SPEED BUILD.
[ CLICK ]
I JUST COMPLETED THE FINISHING TOUCHES ON COREY'S .22,
AND IT'S TIME TO TEST-FIRE.
EARS!
[ Chuckles ] NOPE. JUST ME.
[ GUN FIRING ]
[ CLICK ]
IT'LL DO.
I LIKE THAT.
CLEAR!
HEY!
HEY, JIM.
IS MY GUN DONE?
JUST HEARD MITCH BACK THERE TEST-FIRING IT.
AWESOME. WELL, I'D LOVE TO SEE IT.
WELL, I THINK YOU'RE IN FOR A BIT OF A SURPRISE.
REALLY?
IT MAY NOT LOOK QUITE LIKE IT DID WHEN YOU DROPPED IT OFF.
IT'S HAD A LITTLE FACE-LIFT.
YOU GUYS ALWAYS DO GOOD WORK, SO...
LET'S GO SEE WHAT WE GOT BACK THERE.
OKAY.
HEY, I HEARD YOU SHOOTING
THAT THING BACK HERE. IS IT READY TO GO FOR HER?
YEAH, IT'S ALL DONE.
YEAH. WELL --
NO WAY!
JIM GAVE ME CARTE BLANCHE, SO...
[ Laughs ] HOLY SMOKES.
I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT'S EVEN THE SAME GUN.
WE CAN'T HAVE YOU SHOOTING WITH AN UGLY GUN.
LIFE'S TOO SHORT.
OKAY. WE STUCK A CARBON-FIBER BARREL ON IT.
WOW.
SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT RECOIL TOO MUCH.
YEAH, YOU NEED A MUZZLE BRAKE SHOOTING A .22.
YEAH, THOSE .22s.
WOW.
TELL HER ABOUT THE FINISHING TOUCH ON THERE.
YEAH. YOU GUYS PUT AN AMERICAN FLAG.
YEAH, THAT WAY,
YOU CAN REMEMBER WHAT COUNTRY YOU'RE SHOOTING FOR.
[ Chuckles ] WELL, THAT'S AWESOME.
THIS IS DEFINITELY AN IMPROVEMENT
FROM, UH, AS HANS CALLED IT, THE RUST BUCKET I BROUGHT IN,
AND I CAN'T WAIT TO SHOOT IT.
FISH IS ON ICE. BOAT'S HOOKED UP.
WE'RE GOOD TO GO.
NOW THAT WE'RE DONE FISHING, I'M KIND OF WORRIED
THAT JIM DIDN'T UNDERSTAND
THAT EVERYBODY WAS TAKING THE DAY OFF.
I SHOULD WARN 'EM BEFORE THEY WALK INTO THAT FIRE.
SO WHAT ARE YOU GUYS GONNA TELL JIM WHY YOU TOOK OFF WORK?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN? YOU SAID YOU SMOOTHED US OVER.
YEAH, YOU'RE THE MASTER NEGOTIATOR.
"I'M THE MASTER NEGOTIATOR."
WE'RE ALL TAKING THE DAY OFF AND GOING FISHING."
YEAH. I TOLD HIM I WAS TAKING OFF FISHING AND...
YOU CAME IN AND SAID WE WERE GOLDEN, NOT YOU WERE GOLDEN.
WELL, YEAH, I...
YOU SAID YOU HAD THIS WHOLE THING FIGURED OUT.
IT'S LIKE, THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN "I" AND "WE" IS HUGE.
YOU DIDN'T CUT A DEAL
FOR THESE POOR SCHNOOKS TO GO FISHING, RIGHT?
JUST YOU.
YEAH.
[ BLEEP ]
WE GOT THROWN UNDER THE BOAT.
SO WE JUST SKIPPED A DAY OF WORK?
TYPICAL HANS. TALKS A GREAT GAME.
ALWAYS GOT A SCHEME, AND SOMETIMES THEY BLOW UP.
I FIGURED IF I BROUGHT HIM ENOUGH SMOKED FISH,
IT'D BE FINE.
THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT IN ALASKA.
NO, THAT'S NOT HOW YOU DO IT IN BUSINESS.
WELL, WE'RE NOT SOLVING THIS PROBLEM BY SQUABBLIN'.
LET'S GET THE BOAT HOOKED UP AND GO BACK TO TOWN.
SO LET'S SEE HOW THIS THING DOES.
IT WAS SHOOTING PRETTY GOOD FOR MITCH.
IT SHOULD DO FINE FOR HER. WE'VE GOT THE SAME COLOR EYES.
[ Chuckles ] I THINK YOU PROBABLY DID ALL RIGHT.
YEAH.
OKAY, SHOOTER. YOU GOT THE LINE.
ALL RIGHT, WE'RE GOING HOT.
[ GUN FIRING ]
THAT LOOKED LIKE CENTER.
[ GUN FIRES ]
THAT'S THE BULL'S-EYE.
OH, NICE.
HOW ABOUT SHOOTING ONE ON THE WING?
WE'VE GOT, UH, SOME CLAYS OVER THERE SET UP.
THINK YOU CAN HIT ONE IN THE AIR?
ALL RIGHT. WELL, I'M UP FOR THE CHALLENGE.
WELL, I DEFINITELY FEEL A LITTLE BIT MORE AT HOME
OUT HERE ON THE SHOTGUN RANGE.
SURE.
OKAY.
I'M NOT A SHOTGUN SHOOTER. YOU'RE THE SHOTGUN SHOOTER.
ALL RIGHT, JIM. YOU'RE UP FIRST.
OH, WELL...
HERE'S GOES NOTHING, RIGHT? [ CHUCKLES ]
PULL!
[ GUN FIRING ]
NICE.
Hans and Corey: OH!
MAN.
OKAY, MITCH. SHOW 'EM HOW TO DO IT.
PULL!
[ GUN FIRING AND CLICKING ]
FRICKING SAFETY.
THING KICKED OFF.
SAFETY WENT ON, AND YOU STILL RECOVERED.
ALL RIGHT.
PULL.
WHOO!
DANG, SHE'S NAILING IT, MITCH.
IMAGINE THAT, HUH?
COREY'S CERTAINLY PUTTING US IN OUR PLACE.
I CAN'T COMPETE WITH AN OLYMPIAN.
YOU GUYS CAN SHOOT WITH ME ANY DAY.
THAT WOULD BE FUN.
Ken: THAT WAS A LOT OF FUN,
BUT JIM IS NOT GOING TO BE VERY HAPPY.
Bryan: YOU GOT US INTO THIS MESS.
HE'S PUTTY IN MY HANDS.
I'M WHAT?
I SAID MY HANDS ARE BLOODY FROM CATCHING SO MUCH FISH.
OH. THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT YOU SAID.
YEAH. HOW YOU DOING?
OH, HOW AM I DOING? I'M FURIOUS.
HANS, WHEN YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE TAKING A CREW,
YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU WERE TAKING MY CREW.
YOU LEAVE ME HERE WITH MITCH
TO RUN THE STORE, MR. CUSTOMER SERVICE.
OH, YOU THOUGHT MY CREW.
SORRY ABOUT THE CONFUSION.
I DON'T HOW THIS MISTAKE COULD HAVE HAPPENED.
YOU GUYS KNOW THIS IS OUR BUSY SEASON.
I NEED THIS PLACE STAFFED UP TO WAIT ON THE CUSTOMERS.
SPEAKING OF STAFF, WHERE'S CHASE AT?
UH, I MADE HIM DRIVE US HOME LAST NIGHT,
SO I GAVE HIM THE MORNING OFF.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME? HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE WORKING ON MY...
IS THAT MY FISH?
SURE.
WELL, THAT'S PRETTY GOOD-LOOKING FISH YOU GOT THERE.
FRESH KENAI RED.
ONLY THE BEST FOR YOU.
BOY, THESE WILL LOOK GREAT ON THE GRILL.
HUNDREDS.
HUNDREDS. THEY WERE JUMPING INTO THE BOAT.
WE WEREN'T EVEN CATCHING 'EM.
THEY WERE JUST CATCHING THEMSELVES, SERIOUSLY.
THEY ALMOST SUNK THE BOAT, DUDE.
OKAY, WELL, MAYBE WE DIDN'T GET THAT MANY.
YOU KNOW HOW YOU CAN TELL WHEN A FISHERMAN'S LYING, DON'T YA?
WHEN THEIR LIPS ARE MOVIN'.
YEAH. [ CHUCKLES ]
I'M GONNA PUT THESE IN THE FREEZER.
TOLD YOU HE WAS PUTTY IN MY HANDS.
MAYBE WE SHOULD GO DO SOME WORK
BEFORE WE GET IN ANY MORE TROUBLE.
ALL RIGHT.
MAYBE WE GET HIM SOME MORE FISH
AND, LIKE, GET RAISES OR SOMETHING, YOU KNOW?
♪♪♪
Man: AND NOW...
SO THERE'S SOMETHING AWFUL SPECIAL ABOUT A MOOSE'S ANTLERS.
WHAT IS IT?
HMM. BEATS ME.
WELL, HOPEFULLY SOMEONE WILL
GIVE ME AN ANSWER BEFORE WE RETURN.
SO WHAT'S SO SPECIAL ABOUT A MOOSE'S ANTLERS?
WELL, MOOSE ANTLERS CAN WEIGH UP TO 90 POUNDS.
THAT'S LIKE WEARING A GERMAN SHEPHERD ON YOUR HEAD.
LUCKILY, THEY LOSE THOSE ANTLERS EVERY WINTER.
NOW, THAT'S A WAY TO GET RID OF SOME WEIGHT.
SURE BEATS GOING TO THE GYM. HUH.
[ BEEPS ]
I'LL HOLD THE DOOR FOR YOU.
Ken: THANK YOU, COREY.
SOMEBODY'S A GENTLEMAN AROUND HERE.
WELL, I'VE GOT TO BE NICE TO YOU.
YOU DID MAKE ME A NICE .22, SO...
[ CHUCKLES ]
Ken: THE ADVENTURE BEGINS.
WE ARE HITTING THE ROAD TO GO PTARMIGAN HUNTING WITH COREY.
DON'T DRIVE LIKE AN IDIOT. IT'S A DIRT ROAD.
I'M GONNA LEAVE YOU BEHIND IF YOU DON'T GET IN THE CAR.
DON'T DRIVE LIKE AN IDIOT.
Corey: GOD, I CAN'T BELIEVE
I'M GONNA HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS FOR SIX HOURS.
[ HANS CHUCKLES ]
Larry: WHAT CAN I DO FOR YA?
OH, JUST WANTING TO GET SOME WORK DONE ON A RIFLE.
YOU GUYS DO THAT KIND OF STUFF, RIGHT?
YEP.
I'M INTERESTED IN GOING DUCK HUNTING.
I HAVE A 12-GAUGE RIGHT HERE.
OH, THAT'S A BIG ONE.
AND, UH, IT ACTUALLY HAS PRETTY SMALL GRIPS ON IT, BUT --
YEAH, YEAH, WE'D NEED TO DO SOMETHING WITH THAT.
YOU HAVE PRETTY BIG HANDS. WE CAN PUT BIGGER GRIPS ON IT.
DO SOMETHING MAYBE TO DRESS UP THE SIGHT
SO YOU CAN SEE IT AT NIGHT?
COOL.
WE CAN FLUTE THE BARREL.
AND WE CAN SHAVE SOME WEIGHT OFF THE BOLT,
DEFINITELY LIGHTEN IT UP FOR YOU.
OKAY.
AND WE CAN DO SOME MODIFICATIONS,
MM-HMM.
OR THE TRIGGER JOB FOR THE RECOIL.
I WOULD LOVE BOTH OF THOSE.
I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU DID THAT STUFF HERE.
I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW GOOD THINGS ARE GOING AT NEILS'.
I'M TAKING SALE AFTER SALE
AND DOING A BUNCH OF CUSTOMIZATION ORDERS.
I'D LIKE TO REDUCE THE KICK ON IT.
WELL, WE CAN DO A MUZZLE BRAKE FOR YA,
AND I CAN PUT A SOFTER PAD
YEAH.
THAT'LL BE A LOT BETTER ON THE SHOULDER.
DAMN, THERE'S A LINE? JEEZ, SHE HAS A LINE THERE?
LARRY'S KILLING IT.
IF YOU WANT TO COME PICK IT UP LATER THIS AFTERNOON?
OKAY, THAT WOULD BE SUPER.
YEAH, I THINK I CAN GET IT DONE WITHIN THE NEXT WEEK FOR YA.
WE'LL CALL YOU WHEN IT'S READY.
YOU CAN COME PICK IT UP.
THAT MEANS YOU WANT MY NUMBER, HUH?
SO I'LL JUST START WRITING UP THE TICKET RIGHT NOW.
IF YOU WANT TO DROP IT
BY THE SHOP ANY TIME, WE CAN GET IT DONE FOR YOU.
OKAY.
PERFECT.
SEE YOU SOON.
YEP.
GOOD. SOLD ANOTHER ONE.
SOLD ANOTHER ONE? ALL RIGHT.
GOOD JOB, GIRL.
GOOD JOB.
YEP.
OKAY.
SELL, SELL, SELL.
I'M ON IT.
[ KEN SIGHS ]
Corey: THAT'S A LONG DRIVE.
[ CHUCKLES ]
OH, LOOK AT THIS LODGE.
THIS IS AWESOME.
I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN RIDING ON A DONKEY
FOR FIVE AND A HALF HOURS.
[ SIGHS ]
OH, MAN.
HELL OF A LOT MORE COMFY THAN THE FRONT SEAT OF A CAR.
AH.
HI, SWEETIE.
Bryan: THEY ALREADY GOT THE FIRE LIT UP FOR US.
Corey: DON'T GET TOO COMFORTABLE OVER THERE.
WHEN YOU GO TO THESE FOREIGN COUNTRIES,
DO YOU GET ANY TIME TO, LIKE, GO SIGHTSEE OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT?
OR ARE YOU JUST BUSY ALL THE TIME?
A LITTLE BIT HERE AND THERE. I MEAN, MOST OF THE TIME,
IT'S, YOU KNOW, AIRPORT TO THE HOTEL
TO THE RANGE AND BACK, SO...
IT'S BEEN A FUN EXPERIENCE, THOUGH.
I'VE GOT TO GO TO ALMOST 25 DIFFERENT COUNTRIES,
AND I ALWAYS TRY AND FIND ONE THING,
YOU KNOW, TO GO LOOK AT.
[ Chuckles ] TAKE A QUICK PICTURE
WELL, THAT'S COOL.
SO YOU CAN GO TO A FOREIGN COUNTRY NOW.
NO, I'M GOOD HERE.
WELL, JUST GO REAL QUICK, LIKE THE BAHAMAS.
THAT'S A FOREIGN COUNTRY.
SO WHAT?
YOU'LL BE LAYING ON THE BEACH WEARING A THONG OR SOMETHING.
WHAT ARE YOU GOING -- WHERE ARE YOU GONNA HIDE A GUN?
CAMO SPEEDO.
THAT RIGHT THERE WILL KEEP ME OUT OF THE BAHAMAS FOREVER.
CAMO SPEEDO.
[ COREY LAUGHS ]
HEY, GREAT DAY, LARRY.
I CAN SEE THAT TICKER'S
WE HAD A LOT OF SALES.
YOU KNOW YOUR TRADE QUITE WELL, SO...
YEAH. I THINK I'M PRETTY GOOD AT IT.
I THINK SO, TOO. HEY, THIS JUST MIGHT WORK,
THIS -- THIS GUN RUNNERS, YOU AND I THING, YOU KNOW?
YOU GOT IT.
UM, CAN YOU CLOSE?
DON'T FORGET THE SIGN, OKAY?
GOOD JOB, DARLIN'. GOOD JOB.
SEE YOU TOMORROW.
HEY, BLONDES DO HAVE SOME BRAINS.
BLONDES DO HAVE SOME BRAINS.
THAT THING'S WRONG.
I'M SUPER EXCITED FOR OUR HUNT TOMORROW
AND TO TRY OUT THE NEW GUN THAT YOU GUYS MADE ME.
I'M BRINGING A SHOTGUN.
I MEAN, SHOTGUNS WERE INVENTED FOR SHOOTING BIRDS.
I'M GONNA USE A PISTOL. I'M GONNA MAKE IT A CHALLENGE.
IF WE'RE STILL GONNA DO THIS COMPETITION
AND I'M SHOOTING THE .22, ARE THE TEAMS STILL ON?
WHAT ARE WE DOING?
SO WE SPLIT INTO TWO TEAMS FOR THIS PTARMIGAN HUNT,
AND WHOEVER GETS THE MOST WINS. IT ALREADY SMELLS LIKE VICTORY.
I WANT HER AS A TEAMMATE.
YOU CAN'T HAVE HER. YOU GUYS ARE BOTH SHOOTING .22s,
AND YOU'RE BLIND ANYWAYS.
YOU'RE A HANDICAP, LET ALONE THE PISTOL.
I NEED A SHOTGUN ON MY SIDE.
SHE HAS A .22. ME AND HER WILL...
THEN YOU AND...
THAT'S SHOTGUN AND PISTOL. THERE YOU GO.
OH, GREAT. I'M TEAMED UP WITH KEN.
NOW I KNOW HOW MOE FELT
WHEN HE WAS SADDLED WITH LARRY AND CURLY.
ALL RIGHT, SO THE CHALLENGE IS ON.
LOSERS CLEANING BIRDS.
YEAH.
Hans: LET'S GO DO THIS.
LET'S GO KICK SOME BUTTS.
Corey: ALL RIGHT, GUYS.
WHO'S READY TO GO KILL SOME BIRDS?
THE BEST PLACE FOR PTARMIGAN HUNTING
IS BY THE BLUEBERRY BUSHES, BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THEY EAT.
DON'T SLAM THE DOORS.
[ DOOR ALERT CHIMING ]
Corey: [ Lowered voice ] SEE 'EM?
YEAH. LET'S GO.
[ Singsongy ] HERE, LITTLE PTARMIGANS.
Hans: PRETTY COUNTRY.
Corey: YEAH.
NEED TO STAY SOMEWHAT IN A LINE.
Hans: YEAH.
Bryan: WHEN I GET LIMITED OUT HERE IN ABOUT 20 MINUTES,
I'M GONNA COME BACK AND PICK BLUEBERRIES
TO MAKE BLUEBERRY JAM.
Hans: THERE YOU GO.
LIMITED OUT, UH-HUH.
I'LL SHOOT YOUR LIMIT. YOU WON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT IT.
Hans: HOW MANY CAN YOU SHOOT?
OKAY.
Ken: KIND OF WET OUT HERE, HUH?
Hans: YES. NICE AND SOGGY.
IT KIND OF PUTS THE BIRDS DOWN A LITTLE BIT.
YEAH.
AH, A LITTLE RAIN NEVER HURT ANYONE.
THAT'S RIGHT.
I'M MELTING. I'M MELTING.
[ CHUCKLES ]
Bryan: MAYBE UP THERE AROUND THOSE ROCKS,
ALL THE BERRY PATCHES AND BRUSH UP THERE.
IT LOOKS PRETTY GOOD.
Corey: YEAH. THAT LOOKS LIKE A PERFECT PLACE FOR A PTARMIGAN.
Bryan: LET'S GO CHECK IT OUT.
YOU JUST TOOK IN A BUNCH OF ORDERS
FOR STUFF WE DON'T EVEN DO.
OH, NO.
Bryan: SHOOT ONE, KEN.
[ GUN FIRES ]
I GUESS WE'RE GONNA STARVE TO DEATH TONIGHT.
♪♪♪
♪♪♪
THEY'RE RIGHT TOWARDS THOSE GUYS.
COREY.
OH, RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU. RIGHT THERE ON THE GROUND.
TWO OF 'EM! HA HA!
[ COREY LAUGHS ]
Hans: THOSE ARE BIG BIRDS.
OH!
HANS GOT TWO ON HIS FIRST SHOT. I GOT ONE.
THESE GUYS DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GONNA HIT 'EM.
THEY'RE RUNNING, LIKE LITTLE CHICKENS ON THE GROUND.
OOH!
[ GUN FIRES ]
OH, HE'S DEAD.
[ GUNS FIRING ]
THE THING ABOUT PTARMIGANS -- THERE'S PLENTY OF 'EM,
THEY'RE EASY TO FIND,
AND THEY TASTE GREAT ON THE GRILL.
COME ON, FLY!
[ GUN FIRING ]
Corey: OH, DOUBLE-TEAM!
Ken: JEEZ!
Hans: GOT HIM!
[ GUNS FIRING ]
Corey: HE GOT ONE.
Hans: MAN. THOSE ARE SOME BIG BIRDS.
WE'RE CLEARLY IN THE LEAD, SO...
GREED IN THE LEAD.
GREED, LEAD. OKAY.
I'LL GO WITH THE LEAD.
Bryan: LET'S GO FIND SOME MORE.
MORNING, BOSS.
HEY THERE,
SUPER-TAKE-ORDERS-FOR-THINGS- WE-DON'T-EVEN-DO GIRL.
I'M...GOOD?
YOU SEEM STRESSED.
HERE'S THE DEAL. YOU JUST --
YOU JUST TOOK IN A BUNCH OF ORDERS
FOR STUFF WE DON'T EVEN DO.
I'M SORRY. I DIDN'T KNOW.
WELL, YOU KNOW, WE'RE NOT LIKE WILD WEST GUNS.
WE DON'T HAVE A SHOP. WE DON'T HAVE A BLUING TANK.
I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.
HAVE YOU MET ANYBODY HERE THAT SAYS,
"HELLO, I'M THE GUNSMITH"?
NO, BECAUSE WE DON'T HAVE A SHOP.
WE HAVE A CLOSET AND A BATHROOM. THAT'S IT.
OH, NO.
AT WILD WEST GUNS,
A SUREFIRE WAY TO MAKE AN ORDER IS TO CUSTOMIZE THE GUNS.
I DID NOT REALIZE THAT NEILS DOESN'T DO THAT.
NOW I'VE GOT A BUNCH OF DISAPPOINTED CUSTOMERS.
I'M SO SORRY.
LOOK, DARLIN', UNTIL I FIX THIS STUFF,
I CAN'T PROMISE YOU ANY HOURS, OKAY?
I NEED YOU TO GO HOME.
I'VE GOT TO FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO.
OKAY? OKAY, DARLIN'.
SEE HIM ON THAT BRUSH PILE RIGHT THERE,
BOBBING HIS LITTLE HEAD?
OH, YEAH. I SEE HIM. THAT'S A BIG BIRD RIGHT THERE.
Bryan: OH, THERE'S A BIG ONE RIGHT THERE.
Hans: YEAH.
[ LAUGHS ]
ONE DOWN! [ CHUCKLES ]
ALL RIGHT. I WANT TO GET ONE.
Bryan: SHOOT ONE, KEN.
HUNTING WITH A SHOTGUN IS TOO EASY.
I WANT A CHALLENGE. I'M GONNA USE A PISTOL.
Bryan: YOU HIT A ROCK.
Corey: DO I NEED TO GIVE Y'ALL SOME LESSONS TO USE A SHOTGUN?
Bryan: THERE, NOW THEY'RE ALL OFF THE ROAD.
[ LAUGHING ]
KEN'S STRUGGLING A LITTLE BIT WITH THE PISTOL,
BUT I'M HOPING HE'S GONNA AT LEAST GET ONE TODAY.
Bryan: YEAH, THERE'S ONE SITTING RIGHT UP THERE ON THAT TOP.
SHOOT HIM, KEN.
Corey: OH, RIGHT ON TOP OF THE HILL.
[ GUN FIRING ]
I GUESS WE'RE GONNA STARVE TO DEATH TONIGHT.
YEAH.
JUST BRING IT UP JUST A LITTLE BIT.
OH, YEAH. COME TO PAPA.
Corey: OH!
Bryan: YOU GOT A FEATHER OFF OF HIM.
SHOOT THE ONE TO THE RIGHT OF HIM.
IF THEY WERE TURKEYS, YOU WOULD HAVE ALREADY GOT ONE.
ALL RIGHT. LET'S SEE IF I CAN SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE.
Hans: NICE SHOT.
MAN, I AM LOVING THIS .22. WE'VE GOT THIS IN THE BAG.
I'VE GOT TWO HERE,
AND I THINK A COUPLE MORE THAT I'VE GOT TO PICK UP.
HERE'S THE LAST ONE, I THINK. THAT'S MINE.
Ken: YEAH.
WELL, THAT'S THE LIMIT FOR US. WE'RE HEADED BACK TO THE LODGE.
THESE GUYS ARE WAY BEHIND.
LOOKS LIKE, UH, WE GOT THIS ONE IN THE BAG, HUH, COREY?
I THINK SO. I THINK I'M OUT OF HAVING TO CLEAN BIRDS.
Bryan: I GOT, LIKE, A 14-BIRD HANDICAP, DIDN'T I?
Bryan: BECAUSE OF MY PARTNER.
I GET HALF POINTS.
I GUESS YOU AND BRYAN CAN KEEP DOING SOME REAL HUNTING,
AND WE'RE GONNA GO DRY OUT BY THE FIRE.
I THINK HOT CHOCOLATE SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD, DON'T YOU?
YEAH. THAT WOULD BE EXCELLENT.
BUT, UH, WE'LL COME BACK AND PICK YOU GUYS UP LATER.
I KNOW WE'RE WAY BEHIND, AND I'M NOT USUALLY ONE TO QUIT.
BUT I AM COLD, I AM WET, THIS PISTOL SUCKS,
AND I'M SHOOTING AGAINST AN OLYMPIAN,
AND I AM GOING HOME.
Ken: ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO, KID.
YEAH. I'M DONE WITH THIS.
I'M -- I'M ROLLING BACK TO THE LODGE.
ME, TOO.
[ ENGINE STARTS ]
Hans: HEY, DID YOU SHARPEN YOUR KNIFE UP FOR 20?
Bryan: YEAH.
PHRED, WHERE'S LARRY AT?
UM, SHE'S WORKING OVER AT NEILS' TODAY.
MM-HMM.
WHY ISN'T SHE WORKING HERE? WE NEED SOME HELP.
WELL, SHE WANTED MORE HOURS SO SHE COULD PAY HER BILLS,
BUT KEN SAID THAT YOU WOULDN'T GIVE HER ANY.
MM-HMM.
[ Sighs ] I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.
KEN NEVER TALKED TO ME ABOUT LARRY'S HOURS.
NOW SHE'S WORKING FOR OUR COMPETITORS.
WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO STRAIGHTEN THIS OUT.
THIS IS OUT OF CONTROL.
WELL, THAT WAS SURE AWESOME HUNTING TODAY.
PRETTY GOOD SACK OF BIRDS THERE.
AH!
WELL, I THINK WE GOT OUR LIMIT,
BUT I THINK LOSERS GOT TO CLEAN BIRDS, SO...
YEAH, KID.
NO, NO, YOU'RE...YOU.
YES.
WE LOST AS A TEAM.
WE GET PUNISHED AS A TEAM.
WE'RE GONNA GO HAVE SOME HOT CHOCOLATE.
Bryan: LET'S GO CLEAN SOME BIRDS.
PTARMIGAN ALWAYS TASTES BETTER
WHEN I'M NOT THE ONE CLEANING 'EM.
LET ME EXPLAIN IT TO YOU. LISTEN, LISTEN.
IF I CLEAN BIRDS,
WE'RE GONNA BE CLEANING BIRDS UNTIL 2027.
SO HERE'S WHAT --
I'M GONNA HAVE MARSHMALLOWS IN MY HOT CHOCOLATE, BY THE WAY.
ALL RIGHT. GO TO YOUR CABIN. I'LL GO CLEAN THE BIRDS.
THERE YOU GO.
CLEANING BIRDS IS PUNISHMENT.
CLEANING BIRDS WITH KEN IS CRUEL AND UNUSUAL PUNISHMENT.
I'D RATHER JUST DO THE WHOLE JOB BY MYSELF
THAN HAVE TO LISTEN TO KEN SQUAWK THE WHOLE TIME.
[ Under breath ] YES!
YOU HAVE FUN HUNTIN'?
DUDE, LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.
NOTHIN' IS BETTER THAN BEING OUT THERE.
AND I LOVE THE SMELL OF VICTORY.
WE SMOKED YOU.
HEY, SAVE THE HUNTING STORIES.
WE GOT ANOTHER PROBLEM THAT YOU'VE GOT TO FIX.
WHERE'S LARRY AT?
I DON'T KNOW.
WELL, I'LL TELL YOU WHERE SHE'S AT -- GUN RUNNERS,
WHAT?
AND SINCE YOU'RE THE ONE THAT TOLD HER
WE DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH HOURS FOR HER,
YOU NEED TO GO FIX THIS AND GET HER BACK OVER HERE.
OR I MAY NOT HAVE ENOUGH HOURS FOR YOU TO WORK NEXT WEEK.
[ LAUGHS ]
THERE'S THREE THINGS
I CAN NEVER GET ENOUGH OF -- MOM'S APPLE PIE,
HUNTING, AND WATCHING KEN SQUIRM.
[ LAUGHING ]
THAT'S FUNNY.
WHEN YOU'RE DONE CHORTLING,
COME ON, LET'S GO. GIVE ME A HAND.
I AIN'T GOING. YOU GO TAKE CARE OF YOUR OWN MESS.
WATCH THE COUNTER. I'M JUST GONNA GO BEG NEILS
AND STEAL LARRY BACK OR WHATEVER.
[ LAUGHING ]
♪♪♪
♪♪♪
NEILS, NEILS, NEILS, NEILS,
HEY. WHAT'S UP, BUDDY?
DUDE, DUDE, DUDE, LISTEN, LISTEN.
I'VE GOT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT LARRY.
LET'S TALK ABOUT LARRY.
LISTEN, LISTEN. I'VE GOT TO HAVE LARRY BACK.
I'VE GOT TO HAVE LARRY BACK.
HMM, OKAY.
UM, BUT SHE'S BEEN DOING SUCH A GREAT JOB FOR ME, BUDDY.
I KNOW THAT, DUDE. I KNOW THAT,
AND, YOU KNOW, I'M ALWAYS WILLING
TO HELP YOU AND YOUR BUSINESS.
OH, YOU GUYS DIDN'T GIVE HER ENOUGH HOURS.
GIVE ME BACK LARRY.
I'LL ADMIT IT. I'M DESPERATE RIGHT NOW.
I WILL DO ANYTHING TO GET LARRY BACK
AND TO GET JIM OFF OF MY CASE.
OKAY. HERE'S THE DEAL.
I THINK WE CAN MAKE THIS REAL EASY.
I NEED SOME CUSTOM WORK DONE ON SOME OF OUR STUFF.
HOW MUCH CUSTOM WORK?
I'VE GOT -- I'VE GOT A WHOLE LIST OF STUFF HERE.
YOU DO THAT. YOU DON'T CHARGE ME FOR IT,
I'LL GIVE YOU LARRY BACK, OKAY?
BUT I DON'T WANT DUCT TAPE JOBS.
I WANT QUALITY WILD WEST GUNS WORK.
NO MORE POACHING, POACHER. POACHER.
I DON'T POACH. EVERYBODY COMES TO ME.
DEAL.
NEILS IS A TOUGH NEGOTIATOR.
IT'S GONNA BE EXPENSIVE TO GET LARRY BACK,
BUT IT'S GONNA BE WORTH IT.
LOVE YOU, BUDDY.
HEY, COREY!
HEY, JIM.
BOY, YOU DON'T LOOK ANY WORSE FOR WEAR.
I'M A LITTLE RECOVERED AFTER THE HUNT.
WE GOT RAINED ON PRETTY GOOD, BUT IT WAS FUN.
THE BOYS HAVEN'T QUITE RECOVERED YET.
THEY'RE STILL MOANING AND GROANING
ABOUT HOW BAD YOU SPANKED 'EM UP THERE SHOOTING GROUSE.
SO THEIR PRIDE'S A LITTLE HURT?
[ LAUGHS ]
WE GOT SOMETHING FOR YOU I WANT TO SHOW YOU BACK HERE.
COME ON BACK.
OH, HEY, GUYS.
[ Singsongy ] HI.
WE GOT SOMETHING A LITTLE SPECIAL JUST FOR YOU.
YOU SHOWED ALL THE BOYS HOW TO SHOOT.
WE FIGURED YOU OUGHT TO HAVE
THE WILD WEST GUNS "BEST SHOT" MEDAL.
THANK YOU. THAT'S AWESOME.
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH!
IS THIS, LIKE, REAL ALASKAN GOLD?
[ ALL LAUGHING ]
I DON'T THINK SO. ALL RIGHT.
NOW WE GOT SOMETHING ELSE SPECIAL FOR YOU OUT BACK.
WE'VE GOT THE GRILL GOIN'.
GLAD I DIDN'T EAT LUNCH BEFORE.
ALL RIGHT. LET'S EAT. I'M HUNGRY.
Ken: YEAH.
MMM. I CAN'T WAIT.
GOOD. I'M STARVED.
Ken: I DID A LOT OF WORK ON THEM PTARMIGAN.
Hans: A LOT OF WORK?
I RAN UP AND DOWN THE HILLS CHASING 'EM.
Bryan: I CLEANED ALL OF THEM.
YOU DIDN'T RUN ANYWHERE IN THE LAST DECADE.
THAT WAS THE ONE YOU SHOT.
NO, PROBABLY THAT ONE OVER THERE IS THE ONE YOU SHOT.
I BET THEY'RE ALL GONNA TASTE PRETTY GOOD.
[ Mouth full ] MMM. THAT'S SO GOOD.
NOTHING LIKE BLUEBERRY-FED PTARMIGAN.
MM-HMM.
I KILLED THEM ALL WITH THAT .22. IT SHOOTS REALLY GOOD.
♪♪♪
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