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Hello!
Of all the novelty items that could be created in the wide, wide world, why did somebody
create "Peeing Pooch"?
I've got one of these in real life.
"Caution, dog wees on demand".
Dog wees on demand being one of the least popular facilities offered by Netflix.
Actually, caution? Why are you warning people about something that's only going to happen
if they specifically ask for it?
You're assuming that people have a very short memory.
Anyway, "Don't be fooled by the cute puppy dog eyes. This little dog is not as innocent
as he looks".
Yeah, he's going to pee everywhere isn't he? We got the clue from the name.
"Fill your dogs tray with water, ensuring that it reaches right to the top."
"Place your dogs back legs into the water, pull his tail slowly up to the top and hold
it for five seconds."
"Repeat the action a few times, ensuring the dog sucks enough water."
I think one thing is clear already, this dog will certainly suck.
"Hold his paws still, and wind him up in a clockwise direction."
I can't stress this strongly enough. Don't try that with a real dog.
"Woof Woof".
"Pop him down onto a flat surface, and off he goes. Whoops"!
Oh, the hilarity.
Why am I alive?
Anyway. Umm... Yeah, this was sent to me by a kindly viewer, who for some reason, wishes
to remain anonymous.
Although his real name is David Tomlinson and he lives in Milton Keynes.
OK then.
Let's see what it looks like, out of the packet.
Oh, I've broken the bowl already.
That's a good start. Here we go, Muttley.
Oh he's so cute and jangly and clockwork.
Right, so, pop that down.
Grab some water.
That's about full, I would've said.
Stick his back legs in it.
Then crank his tail up for 5 seconds.
Oh dear, it's making weird squealing noises.
Ok, that's a bit freakish.
I feel like some sort of awful malingering pervert already.
OK, that should do it.
Now we've got to hold his legs down, oop, and get water everywhere, that's the main
thing.
And wind him up.
And watch him go!
Sorry, this surface is a bit slipperier that I was expecting.
Yes indeed, it's dribbling water, as it walks.
Oh, it's cocking its leg.
Oh look!
Yes, and when it *** its leg, it drops some water out.
Then it falls off.
And sprays *** all up the carpet.
Fortunately the *** is actually clean water, I didn't actually go and get some real dog
urine for authenticity.
Well, there we go, this is just what to buy people for Christmas.
So that they can use it once, vaguely laugh at it.
And then spend the rest of their lives, hating your *** guts!
[Subtitles Created by Aran Fielder. Youtube: GoesAroundAndAround]