Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
TO DEFEND YOURSELF
IS TO GO TO THE STORE AND BUY A BAG OF MARBLES
THROW IT AT 'EM YOU MEAN?
YOU HAVE TO HOLD ON TO THEM. THE SOCK WILL STRETCH.
THERE ARE SO MANY OTHER THINGS THOUGH, CHIEF,
THAT WE HAVE ON US, LIKE OUR KEY SET.
JUST LACE THEM BETWEEN YOUR FINGERS.
YOU CAN DO A SCRAPE LIKE A CAT.
YOU COULD KILL 'EM RIGHT HERE.
I'M WALKING, YOU'RE BEHIND ME, YOU KNOW.
EYES. SEE.
EXACTLY, EVERYBODY HAS A SET OF KEYS ON 'EM.
IT'S JUST EASIER TO USE MARBLES, OKAY?
WHAT'S THE FIRST THING WHEN YOU GO TO YOUR CAR?
I'D RATHER HAVE THE KEYS
YOU'RE FORGETTING ONE THING.
DON'T TALK! I'M NOT FINISHED.
WITH A SOCK, YOU'VE GOT A DISTANCE. PSHH.
SEE, YOU'VE GOT SHORT ARMS LIKE A T. REX,
BRIAN, SHUT UP!
NONE OF THIS EVEN MATTERS BECAUSE IF SOMEBODY ATTACKED ME
I'D (bleep) SHOOT THEM ANYWAY.
(chicken clucks)
(clock ticks)
(slurps)
(slurps)
(camera clicks)
(alarm ringing)
(insect buzzes)
ACTUALLY CAPTAIN NOW.
WHERE ARE WE GONNA START?
WELL, THE ENTRANCE IS RIGHT OVER HERE
WHERE WE'RE GONNA BE TICKETING PEOPLE
OKAY.
(Starr) JJK HAS BEEN HIRED TO PROVIDE
FOR THE SECURITY AT THIS EVENT.
THERE'S GONNA BE A BONFIRE HERE,
AND THERE'S GONNA BE A BONFIRE ON TOP OF THIS HILL.
I LOVE DOING JOBS LIKE THIS. IT'S COMPLICATED.
WE'RE GONNA HAVE FIRE-POI DANCERS.
THERE'S THE POTENTIAL FOR SOMETHING GOING WRONG.
PEOPLE GOT TO KEEP AN EYE OUT SO THEY DON'T DROWN.
I DO NOT, ACTUALLY.
AND YOU GET TO ENJOY THE VIEW, ALTHOUGH YOU CAN'T ACT LIKE IT.
(man) WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
WELL, WE HAVE TO MAINTAIN PROFESSIONAL--
UM, GIRLS.
THE SOUND ORDINANCE IS A THING THAT WE HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT,
SO THIS IS WHERE WE'RE GONNA BE SETTING THE STAGE UP.
(yells out)
UH, YES.
OKAY. I THINK I GOT A GOOD SENSE OF WHAT WE NEED TO DO.
JOAN!
GOOD TO SEE YOU. DID YOU BRING THAT DOG?
PORK CHOP.
SO WHAT'S YOUR SHOW GONNA BE ABOUT TONIGHT?
I'M GONNA TRY PROGRAMMING THE SHOW TONIGHT MYSELF, OKAY?
UH-OH, I DON'T KNOW, IRWIN.
(Irwin) I'M A LITTLE FRUSTRATED WITH THE JOAN KOPLAN FORUM
BECAUSE IT'S JUST, UM, A BUNCH OF IDLE CHATTER.
IF YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT ANYTHING,
TALK ABOUT THE WEATHER.
FOR BREAKFAST I HAD A BOWL OF OATMEAL.
I DON'T LIKE PEOPLE STICKING PICKLES IN A HAMBURGER.
JOAN REALLY DOESN'T SEEM TO CARE.
ONE CALLER CALLED TO SAY THAT IT WOULD BE, UH--
(laughing)
LOOK AT THIS.
I'M GONNA HANG AROUND AND WATCH YOU FOR A WHILE.
WELL, I'VE GOT PAPER, I'VE GOT A PEN.
(woman) ALL RIGHT, GET READY. COMING TO YOU.
HELLO, WELCOME TO JOAN KOPLAN'S FORUM.
MY HAIR LOOKS LIKE CRAP AGAIN TONIGHT.
LOOK AT THAT, I SWEAR.
WE'RE GONNA TRY A LITTLE DIFFERENT, UH, FORMAT THIS TIME.
UM, FOLKS, RIGHT NOW, I'D LIKE TO INTRODUCE
A CERTIFIED PUBLIC ACCOUNTANT IN CHATTANOOGA.
LET ME ASK YOU, UH, WHAT IS THE HOMESTEAD INVENTION?
IF YOU'RE ABOVE THE 10%-15% BRACKET
THEN THERE'S 15%... STANDARD DEDUCTION FOR 2012...
IF YOU'RE MARRIED FILING JOINT RETURN...
HIGH INCOME LOCALITY...
THEY DECREASE THE SOCIAL SECURITY
WITHHOLDING TAXES BY 2%, AND, UH...
(man) SO WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS ACCOUNTANT GUEST?
I THINK HE'S KIND OF CUTE. THAT'S IT.
WE APPRECIATE YOU COMING ON. ANYWAY, GOOD NIGHT.
GOOD NIGHT, ALL.
(Irwin) I REALLY THINK I IMPROVED ON THE SHOW,
BUT I'VE GOT A LOT OF TWEAKING YET TO DO.
WHY DON'T YOU COME BY AND SEE ME TOMORROW?
WE'LL TALK.
(Starr) ONE, TWO, THREE TEST, TEST.
FOUR, FIVE, SIX, ***.
IT TAKES A LOT OF MANPOWER TO RUN AN EVENT LIKE THIS RAVE.
(Brian) HELLO, CHIEF, CAN YOU HEAR ME?
AM I COMING IN OVER THERE?
(laughs)
JUST A NOTE, GUYS.
IF YOU WANT A PRIVATE CONVERSATION
YEAH.
I'M FAMILIAR WITH RADIOS.
GOD, I'M FREEZING. DAMN IT.
(dog barks)
HERE COMES THE MAILMAN, BRIAN. GET OVER HERE!
HEY, BRIAN.
GOT YOU SOME MAIL TODAY.
YOU GOT IT.
A FLAGPOLE.
FOR WHAT?
LET ME SEE IT.
IT COULD BE GANDALF'S STAFF FOR ALL YOU KNOW.
I COULD BE INTO COSPLAY.
HE'S UP TO SOMETHING.
I'VE BEEN DATING BONNIE OVER A YEAR AND A HALF NOW.
AND IT'S TIME TO FINALLY MAKE THIS BIG JUMP.
(chuckles) THAT'S PRETTY PUBLIC, DON'T YOU THINK?
I DON'T WANT IT TO BE CHEESY LIKE WHAT EVERYBODY ELSE DOES.
PULL IT UP?
YEAH.
SO I'VE GOT TO MAKE SURE IT'S AT LEAST SOMEWHAT ORIGINAL.
(Joan) GET OVER HERE AND LOOK OUT THIS WINDOW.
I'LL BE DAMNED. IT SAYS, "MARRY ME."
DON'T START CRYING.
I AM NOT CRYING BECAUSE I WANT TO CRY.
IT JUST CAME OUT.
LISTEN, I KNOW YOU JOKE AROUND SEXUALLY THIS AND THAT,
BUT IT'S MORE LIKE HE'S LIKE A SON TO YOU,
LIKE A SON THAT YOU NEVER HAD
BUT KIND OF IN A (bleep) UP WAY
BECAUSE YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM.
YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY FOR HIM THAT HE'S HAPPY.
WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HAVING A CRUSH ON SOMEBODY...
AND BEING IN LOVE WITH THEM?
(Christa) YOU'VE GOT CHIEF MARRIED TO IRWIN
AND DENNIS THAT'S IN LOVE WITH CHIEF,
AND THEN CHIEF THAT'S IN LOVE WITH BRIAN.
IT'S LIKE, WHO AM I SUPPOSED TO LOVE?
LAMB CHOP?
NO, NOT YET.
UH-HUH.
(Joan) EVEN THOUGH I'M HAPPILY MARRIED TO IRWIN,
I'M ALSO IN LOVE WITH BRIAN.
I THINK THAT HE IS IN LOVE WITH ME JUST A LITTLE BIT.
(sighs) IT'S TOUGH ISN'T IT?
(you know) YOU'VE GOT SOMEONE THAT YOU CAN'T HAVE.
BECAUSE IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW I FEEL...
THE FEELINGS ARE REAL, AND I CAN'T--
YOU CAN'T TURN 'EM OFF.
THEY'RE THERE FOREVER AND YOU DEAL WITH IT.
I FEEL LIKE A GIRL IN LOVE WITH A BOY.
I SEE SO MANY SIMILARITIES. IT'S JUST NOT FUNNY.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT NOW.
I AM.
YOU KNOW WITH YOUR EXPERIENCE ON HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT BRIAN
EXACTLY MY PLACE,
AND HOW I FEEL ABOUT YOU...
BUT YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE IT.
I'M NOT STUPID.
I KNOW THAT HE STARES AT ME A LOT.
YOU SOUND LIKE YOU'RE MAD AT ME.
DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG?
(Judy) IRWIN, I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ASIDE FROM JOAN.
NOT THAT I DIDN'T WANT JOAN AROUND,
BUT I JUST FEEL LIKE I CAN RELATE TO YOU BETTER
IF SHE'S NOT HERE.
WELL, OKAY, WELL, GO AHEAD.
TRUE.
AND I WOULD LIKE TO EXPLAIN TO HER THAT
YOU NEVER WANT DEAD AIR IN A SHOW.
OKAY, FUN AND GAY.
I WATCH THE NATIONAL TALK SHOWS A LOT.
YEAH.
MM-HMM.
RIGHT.
YEAH.
THAT WOULD BE GOOD.
PEOPLE LOVE ANIMALS, PRETTY GIRLS, OR CHILDREN.
THAT'S KIND OF BEYOND THE SCOPE
OF WHAT I ENVISIONED FOR THE SHOW,
BUT, YEAH, THAT WOULD BE GREAT.
MY REGARDS TO JOAN.
BYE-BYE.
THIS IS GONNA BE A FUN CONVERSATION.
CAN I HAVE A CHAT WITH YOU FOR A FEW MINUTES, CHIEF?
UH-OH.
OH, BOY, I DON'T KNOW.
YOU JUST--(laughs)
(Starr) SHE FARTED, DIDN'T SHE?
OKAY, WHAT?
WELL, I GUESS YOU KNOW BONNIE'S THE GIRL THAT,
YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR.
I KNOW.
AND I'M FINALLY GONNA POP THE QUESTION.
I JUST DON'T WANT YOU TO BE, LIKE, UPSET OR DEPRESSED.
I THINK THAT YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR ME.
OF COURSE I HAVE FEELINGS FOR YOU.
I MEAN, I CARE ABOUT YOU. I LOVE YOU.
YOU'RE LIKE YOU KNOW, MY MOM, BOSS, BEST FRIEND.
YOU'RE LIKE A LITTLE BIT OF EVERYTHING ALL IN ONE.
I'M TALKING ABOUT GIRL-BOY FEELINGS FOR ME.
I CAN'T SAY YOU'RE LIKE MY GIRLFRIEND,
BUT, I MEAN, YEAH, I TOLD YOU IF YOU WERE YOUNGER
I'D PROBABLY DATE YOU, YEAH.
OKAY, WELL, I WISH YOU THE BEST, YOU KNOW,
I THINK IT'S NICE THAT YOU HAD THIS TALK WITH ME.
(sniffles)
DON'T NEED TO CRY.
COME ON.
THINK HAPPY THOUGHTS.
SO I'LL SHAKE YOUR HAND AND WISH YOU GOOD LUCK.
YOU DON'T WANT TO HUG ME?
YEAH, IT'S FUNNY.
I DIDN'T WANT TO HUG YOU BECAUSE I THOUGHT I'D CRY,
SO I DIDN'T EVEN HUG YOU YET AND I'VE STARTED TO CRY.
ALL RIGHT, SWEETIE.
THIS IS NEWS TO ME.
WHY?
YOU WANT TO GO TO A SWINGER'S RESORT?
NOW THAT'S WHERE YOU HAVE SEX WITH EVERYBODY.
IS THIS PART OF YOUR BUCKET LIST?
THERE'S SOME THINGS I WANT TO DO.
IRWIN, I'LL PAY FOR YOU TO GO IF THAT'S GONNA MAKE YOU HAPPY.
I'M SURE YOU'D WANT TO GO WITH ME.
I'M GONNA WALK AROUND AND LOOK AT GUYS' (bleep) IS THAT RIGHT?
I WOULD LAUGH MY BUTT OFF. I TRULY WOULD.
THEN YOU WOULD BE KICKED OUT.
WOULD YOU GO NUDE? I MEAN, HOW FAR WOULD YOU GO?
I WOULD JUST PROBABLY WEAR BERMUDA SHORTS.
THAT'S SOME NERVE GO TO A NUDIST COLONY WITH YOUR CLOTHES ON.
THAT'S JUST ME.
I THINK YOU JUST WANT TO GO TO SEE A PEEP SHOW.
YEAH.
PEOPLE GO TO NUDIST COLONIES
BELIEVE IT OR NOT,
14 OR 15 INCHES TO ME IS A TURN-OFF
BECAUSE THAT'S, THAT'S, UH, A FREAK OF NATURE.
JOAN, IT'S A HORSE.
ALL RIGHT, SO THIS IS IT. TODAY'S THE BIG DAY.
BONNIE THINKS WE'RE JUST GOING GEOCACHING.
OH, LOOK AT YOU.
SHE HAS NO IDEA ABOUT ANY OF THIS,
SO I'M HOPING THIS ALL GOES WELL.
SEVEN YEARS?
(Brian) MY GOOD FRIEND HAS GOT THIS HUGE BOAT,
SO HE'S GONNA TAKE US TO AN ISLAND
WHERE WE'VE HIDDEN THE GEOCACHE WITH THE RING IN IT.
I THINK WE NEED TO BUY A HOUSEBOAT.
YOU AND I KISSED RIGHT THERE. OUR FIRST KISS, WASN'T IT?
THAT IS FACTUALLY CORRECT.
HERE WE ARE.
POINT 18 FROM DESTINATION.
OKAY, I GUESS I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE MORE TREACHEROUS.
THIS ISN'T MORDOR WE'RE GOING TO, BONNIE, HELL.
CABIN IN THE WOODS.
IT'S A GOOD PLACE FOR A ***, BONNIE.
I WOULDN'T GO IN THERE.
(giggles)
I LOVE GEOCACHING.
WE'VE BEEN DOING IT THE WHOLE TIME WE'VE BEEN DATING.
45 FEET.
(man) IS THERE A CERTAIN THRILL WHEN YOU FIND ONE?
I LIKE FINDING IT BEFORE BRIAN DOES.
(gasps) I SEE IT!
GOOD JOB, BONZARELLI.
LET'S GET A PICTURE. WE GOT TO DOCUMENT IT.
IT'S GOING PRETTY GOOD SO FAR. ONE CACHE DOWN, TWO MORE TO GO.
YEAH.
I'LL BE RIGHT THERE TO HELP YA.
(whispers) I DON'T THINK SHE KNOWS WHAT'S GOING ON YET.
WE'LL SEE.
(man) WHAT'S THAT YOU HAVE THERE, CAPTAIN?
THIS IS MY EVENT KIT FOR THIS RAVE.
GOT MY GROUP OF RADIOS HERE,
BARRIER TAPE, METAL DETECTORS,
RESTRAINTS FOR ARREST PURPOSES,
BUILT SOME MAGNETIC SIGNS FOR FIRST AID,
AND NOW I'M THE FIRST AID VEHICLE.
AND, OF COURSE, PEPPER SPRAY.
SOMETHING AS SIMPLE AS A DRINK BEING TIPPED OVER
BY THE WRONG PERSON CAN LEAD INTO A FULL-OUT BRAWL.
(man) JOAN, CAN YOU SIT DOWN,
AND WE'LL SEE HOW IT FEELS TO YOU.
IRWIN, WOULD YOU MIND SITTING OVER HERE--
(Judy) IRWIN LOOKS GREAT TONIGHT.
HE'S GOT HIS HAIR ALL FLUCIED UP.
I KNOW Y'ALL ARE HURRYING,
YES, SIR.
THAT'LL WORK.
THAT'LL WORK, YEAH.
CHECK ONE, TWO, CHECK.
I'M SO SORRY I DIDN'T PREPARE A BIGGER MONOLOGUE.
I COULD'VE DONE IT TO RAP MUSIC.
WE DIDN'T PRACTICE ANYTHING.
I'VE NEVER DONE ANYTHING LIKE THIS BEFORE.
(Brian) ALL RIGHT, ONE LEFT.
POINT 14, BON.
GOT TO BE RIGHT AROUND HERE.
WELL, FROM WHAT I CAN TELL,
THERE'S NOTHING UNDERNEATH THESE BOULDERS.
SHOULD BE GETTING CLOSE.
RIGHT HERE?
HOW MANY FEET?
IT SAYS 15.
LET ME SEE. I DON'T BELIEVE YOU.
YOU DIDN'T LOOK ME IN THE EYE WHEN YOU SAID HOW FAR WE WERE.
WELL, I'M TELLING YOU, IT'S BOUNCING AROUND
BUT IT SHOULD BE RIGHT HERE, THOUGH.
NO.
HERE IT IS.
HERE.
WHAT IN THE WORLD? HOLY (bleep)!
WHAT IS THAT?
ARE YOU FOR REAL?
OH, MY GOD! (laughing)
(laughs)
BONNIE?
LOOK AT THE BRIDGE.
WHAT DOES IT SAY?
BONNIE, WILL YOU MARRY ME?
IS THAT THE RING?
IS THAT THE ONE RING YOU'RE GONNA RULE ME WITH
YOU PUT IT ON.
OH, MY GOD, I'M SHAKING.
YOU'RE SHAKING.
REALLY?
I'M BLINDED BY IT.
THANK YOU!
ALL RIGHT, CAN I HAVE YOU RALLY OVER HERE FOR ME?
OKAY, COMMUNICATION DEVICES.
DO NOT MESS WITH YOUR CHANNELS.
THESE RADIOS ARE SET TO WHERE THEY NEED TO BE.
IF WE HAVE A PROBLEM, PLEASE SAY "LOLLIPOP."
THAT'S YOUR CODE WORD-- LOLLIPOP, OKAY?
ALL RIGHT, IS EVERYBODY CLEAR ON WHAT THEY'RE DOING?
AS I'M GONNA BE.
ALL RIGHT, HAVE A GOOD TIME, GUYS.
(band playing)
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE JOAN KOPLAN HOUR!
AND NOW YOUR HOST,
HE-E-E-E-ERE'S JOANIE!
GUESS WHAT? EVERYBODY IN HERE IS ON CRACK,
BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR CRACK IS.
(rimshot)
THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.
OKAY, WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU TONIGHT
SO STICK AROUND EVERYONE.
WE HAVE MUCH MORE TO--
HERE'S ONE OF MY FAVORITE WORDS--COME.
EVENTS LIKE THESE ARE SOME OF THE MOST CHALLENGING.
MY GUARDS ARE DEALING WITH THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE
(man on walkie-talkie) HEY CAPTAIN,
WE'VE GOT A LOLLIPOP SITUATION DOWN HERE
BY THE FRONT GATE.
(engine starts)
SOMEONE HIT CHRISTA'S CAR AND TOOK OFF AND RUN.
I JUST HEAR (imitates tires squealing)
AND I SEE THE DUDE HOP OUT OF THE CAR
AND I CHASED HIM, I TACKLED HIM,
AND I PUT MY KNEE IN HIS BACK AND I SIT THERE AND HELD HIM
EXCELLENT.
AND HE GOES "I ATE SOME SHROOMS,
I'M COMING DOWN HARD, HARD, HARD."
SO I WAS SAYING, "MAN, I'M ON SHROOMS, TOO"
TO MAKE HIM FEEL COMFORTABLE SO HE WOULDN'T TAKE OFF AGAIN.
GOOD JOB, YOU MIGHT BE A SECURITY OFFICER YET.
I HOPE HE HAS INSURANCE.
(band plays flourish)
(Irwin) OKAY.
YOU MIGHT BE RECOGNIZING HIM FROM THE BAND POISON,
PLEASE WELCOME BRETT MICHAELS.
(audience applause)
I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW SOMEBODY COULD HAVE A CEREBRAL HEMORRHAGE
AND LIVE THROUGH IT.
HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO DO THAT?
UH, I DIDN'T HAVE ONE.
(Irwin) NOW A LITTLE EXOTIC ENTERTAINMENT.
HERE WE ARE WITH CAL HAYGOOD FROM SUGAR'S BARBEQUE.
KEEP ALL YOUR FINGERS NOW.
(laughs)
I'M BRETACULAR,
I'M A BRETT MICHAEL'S IMPERSONATOR.
WOULD'VE BEEN NICE IF SOMEBODY WOULD'VE TOLD ME THAT.
IT'S TIME FOR MAJORS AND MINORS.
GO AHEAD AND SWITCH.
TELL ME WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
JUSTIN BIEBER'S DANCER.
BABY BIRD IS A DOUBLE YELLOW HEAD AMAZON.
OH, HE WANTED TO COME SEE YOU.
HELLO SWEET PEA. HELLO.
DO YOU WANT TO SEE MY ROOM?
(squawking)
(screams)
MM-MM.
MM. MM-MM.
HOW MANY MORE MINUTES DO WE HAVE TO BE HERE?
(children laughing)
NICE-A TALKIN' TO YOU.
I WANT TO THANK ALL OF MY LOVELY GUESTS FOR HELPING ME.
IT MAKES TONIGHT'S SHOW A SPEECY SPICY MEATBALL.
AND THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR WATCHING.
OKAY. WHOA, AHH!
(Joan) IRWIN, STOP IT.
WATER.
(Starr) CHIEF'S COMING IN. LOOK ALIVE!
HOW WAS THE SHOW?
JOAN'S EXHAUSTED.
YEAH, I'M GOOD FOR THIS.
IT'LL BE HARD TO DO A SHOW LIKE THAT EVERY WEEK,
THAT'S FOR SURE.
RIGHT.
THEY'LL BE DEALING WITH THE MONEY.
YEAH.
ALL RIGHT.
(***, crowd exclaims)
YOU THREW A FIRECRACKER, MAN?
YOU UNDERSTAND WE'RE SECURITY OFFICERS?
YOU UNDERSTAND THAT WE DEAL WITH GUNS?
YOU UNDERSTAND WE THOUGHT SOMEONE FIRED UPON US?
IT'S A PARTY. WE'RE NOT HIRED TO BE POLICE.
WE'RE NOT PLAYING. I'LL PUT YOU OUT RIGHT NOW.
BUT, BASICALLY, DON'T DO ANYTHING TOO STUPID.
ALL RIGHT.
I'VE BEEN AROUND A WHILE,
BUT I'VE NEVER SEEN A JELL-O SHOT BEFORE.
I WON'T TELL IF YOU WON'T.
SAVE IT AND EAT IT WHEN YOU'RE OFF DUTY.
KEEP IT IN YOUR POCKET.
YEAH! (laughs)
WHAT I SEE HERE ARE PEOPLE OUT TO HAVE A GOOD TIME.
THEY MAY BE DOING SOME ILLEGAL THINGS, MAYBE,
BUT THAT'S NOT MY BUSINESS.
WE'RE HIRED TO KEEP THESE PEOPLE SAFE,
AND THAT'S WHAT WE'RE DOING.
HAVE A GOOD NIGHT, CHIEF. GET HOME SAFE.
(sighs)
HEY IRWIN, LET'S GO.
ALL RIGHT, CHRISTA,
COME WITH ME, I'LL GIVE YOU A RIDE HOME.
LEAVE THE BIRD ALONE.
LEAVE THE BIRD ALONE.
LEAVE THE BIRD ALONE. LEAVE HIM ALONE.
LEAVE THE BIRD ALONE.