Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
1x24 - Monsters No More
[whirring]
[all screaming]
Toad men!
I hate Toad men!
[grunts]
I hear ya, Hulk.
There's too many
for even me ta clobber!
You're just gettin' old, Thing!
There's never enough to smash!
[croaking]
Hey!
Ya ugly Toad!
Try that again!
[grunting]
Argh!
Hope I don't get warts!
Slash!
A-Bomb: Comin' through, froggies!
- Hey, hey, hey!
- Stay still, A-Bomb.
The Toads are known to
overwhelm planets with
their sheer numbers and
right now it's working!
Anybody care for fried frog legs?
Courtesy of the Human Torch.
Sue! Any word from
Reed or She-Hulk?
Reed's trying to figure out
a way to stop that!
Oh, yeah? Well we can
give it our best shot first.
It ain't working, green! We
can't even pierce its shields.
If we can't stop 'em,
the Earth will be overrun!
She-Hulk: Anyone
call for some back-up?
Hulk! I think I have a solution
against the tribbitites!
This hyper-cannon is designed
to launch a projectile
Theoretically, it will pierce
the shields, but we'll need
A Hulk bullet.
I get it, stretch.
Fire me.
I'll take out the
ship from inside the shields.
Hulk, you can't.
You'll never survive!
You wanted the world to know we're
heroes.
Heroes make sacrifices.
Hulk: I'm locked and loaded, Jen.
Ready to fire.
This just in: The Fantastic Four is
attempting to stop the alien Toad men,
with the help of the
monster known as the Hulk!
But for all we know,
that awful green goliath
is in cahoots with these
amphibious invaders!
She-Hulk: Fire away!
[groaning]
Permission to come aboard.
Reed, the ship's empty!
Must be remote-piloted!
There's a huge teleporter here,
beamin' the Toads across
space, then down to Earth.
Must be a waypoint station.
If you shut it down, Hulk,
they should beam home.
But whatever you do, don't smash it!
[grunting]
Uh, did you say, "don't smash it?"
[all gasping]
She-Hulk: Hulk!
- Skaar: Hulk not moving!
- She-Hulk: Hulk! No!
Please be alive, please be alive.
Nothing could survive a
quantum blast of that magnitude.
Don't you leave us now, boss.
[stammering]
Wake up, Hulk!
[roaring]
[groans]
[groaning]
Don't scare me like that!
You truly are incredible, Hulk.
[sobbing]
I'm losing it, Red.
That's better.
All: [cheering]
Hulk! Hulk! Hulk!
[applause]
Hulk strongest one there is!
Yes, it's true.
I was wr
Uh, misled by the facts.
Apparently, the Hulk saved us and is
a hero.
[clears throat]
Yes, I said hero!
You heard me correctly.
Wow.
This isn't a dream, right?
We did it! The world finally
sees you for what you are, Hulk.
A hero!
At last.
Yo big guy! Hey!
What're you doing down here?
The Mayor called!
Vista Verde's full of reporters
and they wanna see you!
They're not scared anymore.
Not gonna last, Rick.
Do you hear this guy?
We've got more views online than ever!
New fans are watching our old
webisodes to see how we've been heroes.
[breathing heavily]
Look!
[crowd cheering]
Thank you Captain America
and this great country.
But seriously, me saving
the world was nothing and
[Captain America clears throat]
Um
I mean, the Hulk sends
his humble gratitude.
[bell ringing]
Director: Cut! That's a wrap!
[cell phone ringing]
Hulk: Heya, Jen! What's up?
How are things going on the set?
Thanks for getting me this part
in your new action movie, Hulk.
Finally, I'm getting to play me!
But I gotta to tell you, the
actor playing you? Kind a whack.
[chuckles] Welcome back
to Hollywood, honey.
[catching breath]
[crowd cheering]
Filling in for the incredible Hulk
in our wrestling championship,
is the almost-as-incredible, Skaar!
Now remember, kid, this is for
charity.
It's all fake fightin'.
I don't wanna have to hurt ya!
[grunting]
I said it was fake!
Wrestling not fake!
Fighting place
remind Skaar of home.
Can't remember why.
Ha! Maybe that'll
jar yer memory!
So, um, if you're
gonna stay down here,
Do you mind if I have your
tickets to the Dazzler concert?
- She's a hottie! I mean
- You go, Rick.
But you know we haven't changed.
[chuckles]
Except people love us!
I'll bring ya a Dazzler t-shirt!
Thanks, bud!
I hope they have
triple, triple, extra-large.
Rick's show did what he
wanted it to, made us heroes.
Seems like the team's all
doing their own thing now.
Maybe it's time we went
our separate ways.
Can we turn the camera off now?
Look at this mess.
Somebody
needs to clean their room.
You finally did it.
You became a hero.
Wasn't just me.
It's called teamwork.
Something you wouldn't know about.
Oh, really? Well, you
received your deepest wish,
you're all heroes now.
How poignant!
Perhaps I'll get my deepest
wish, to destroy you.
Yeah.
Good luck doing that
from in there, big head.
[scoffs]
I've been free for hours,
- you idiotic ape.
- Huh?
Your newfound fame was
the perfect distraction.
[grunting]
- Impossible!
- Don't worry.
I left you a going-away gift.
Five gifts, actually.
Five gamma bombs
which will destroy Vista
Verde in exactly 13 minutes.
The Leader: Even one of
them alone has enough power
to level the entire town.
If I were you [roaring]
I'd hurry.
I was on set,
what's the emergency?
Hulk: The Leader escaped!
Stop pullin' my big red leg.
Gets worse.
He hid
five gamma bombs in town.
- We gotta find them!
- Jones! You were
supposed to keep an eye on mega-brain!
Uh, no way, it's Skaar's week!
Skaar thought She-Hulk's turn.
- Told ya, I was on set!
- Well, who messed up?
- I'm not gonna do when it's not my turn.
- Not Skaar!
That's why we have turns!
Hey! The town, those people
are all that matters!
Well, what did your
beloved Mayor promise you?
Our incredible Hulks
have finally arrived!
[cheering]
Everyone! Out of here, now!
You have to move!
[confused chattering]
I said, get out!
Man: He's gone crazy!
Get out of here!
Hulk: If we move fast enough,
we can get all the bombs.
Split up and search everywhere.
And I mean everywhere!
[grunting]
Abomination.
Good to see you, old friend!
I have a team now, too.
- Red: The Absorbin' Man!
- A-Bomb: Blastaar!
- Skaar: Sauron!
- She-Hulk: Titania!
You can call us
the Agents of C.
R.
A.
S.
H.
Catchy, no?
You helped the Leader
plant the gamma bombs.
Nah.
We're just here
to make sure they go off.
Enough with the small talk.
Let's show 'em why we're
called the Crashers.
Smash 'em.
[roaring]
[all grunting]
[crowd screaming]
Breaking news!
Well, it didn't take long.
The Hulks are showing their true colors
and attacking the town of Vista Verde!
You're gonna tell me
where the gamma bombs are.
Will it be the easy way
or the hard way?
[people screaming]
He's raging again!
[grunts]
Run!
[groaning]
Skaar hate
lizard-bird-man-thing!
Lasers, eh? Lemme get a
closer look at yer cannon!
[groaning]
[laughing]
Hey! You're welcome!
[frightened chattering]
This will shut you up for
a while, you crazy witch!
- You're the one who's crazy!
- What are you talking about?
[groans]
So where's the bomb, Blastaar?
Or are you planning to
blow yourselves up too?
We have the ultimate
protection against the bomb.
[screaming]
[grunts] My turn.
[A-Bomb grunts]
A-Bomb:
A-Bomb's away!
We got it under control, people!
Just move in an orderly
fashion to the exits
- Woman: He's crazy, run!
- of the town.
What was that? Huh?
Okay, something screwy's
goin' on around here.
I mean, you can see him, can't you?
Hold on, lemme adjust the gamma.
[grunting]
Oh, no!
[grunts]
See these gamma
cloaking belts, Hulk?
Courtesy of the Leader.
Only gamma-fied types
like you can see us.
To the rest of the world,
we're as invisible as ghosts.
Shoulda made yourselves
invisible to us, too!
Nah, fighting you is
all part of the plan.
[growling]
Hulk: What plan?
People in this town love you.
We're makin' 'em pay for that mistake.
[grunting]
[roars]
[grunting]
You were once a general.
How's it feel to be Hulk's errand boy?
Ah, zip it! Red Hulk
ain't no one's number two!
Sauron: You wanted Hulk to be a hero.
But he will always be a beast!
One of us! One of us!
[Sauron laughing] Let me introduce
you to a personal friend of mine!
Sauron, meet the wall.
- Ahh!
- Wall, meet Sauron.
And you, Hulk's pet!
You don't belong here.
Your world is across time and space!
Skaar can't remember home!
Argh!
You think you're special?
You're animal control, honey.
Just taxiing around with monsters!
You used to have a life!
You don't know me.
So shut your cakehole, you evil
[roaring]
Mayor! The bombs could
go off at any second!
Get those people
further away from here!
Sorry, Hulk, I can't hear you.
There's no signal!
We're getting multiple
reports out of Vista Verde
that the Hulks have gone berserk!
We've all worked so hard
to make the world love you.
And now, our poor little town
what are you doing, Hulk?
Nice try, gizmo's made
outta pure Adamantium.
Leader planned every detail
while you had him locked up.
He didn't plan for this!
[grunts] Don't let 'em
get to you, Hulks!
You know who you are!
You're the Agents of S.
M.
A.
S.
H!
Consider yourself crashed.
The bombs!
Must be only seconds left!
[helicopter approaching]
A-Bomb: Ah, Hulk?
I think we're surrounded.
Pilot: Hulks! Stand down
now or we will open fire!
I'm still a general, soldier,
and I order you to stand down!
We have the situation under control!
They were the ones that
did it! The Crashers!
The only visual we have is
you five wrecking the town!
- A-Bomb: Hulk! See?
- They can't see 'em!
We got no time to argue.
Find the bombs!
Red: They gotta be close by!
[grunting]
So where are they?
- Maybe they're deep underground?
- Hold up.
This isn't a bomb.
What is this?
There are no bombs?
Of course there were.
Isn't it obvious?
You are the five gamma bombs
that destroyed Vista Verde.
No.
You did this.
You tricked us into
destroying the town.
And you five fell for it like that!
This will be your legacy, Hulk.
The destruction of your beloved town.
Now and forever!
Man 1: Look what he
did to the town!
- Man 2: How could they do this?
- Woman: They went crazy!
We can't trust 'em.
I knew there was something fishy.
The Hulk and his agents of
S.
M.
A.
S.
H.
are not heroes, they're mosnters!
Who else but monsters would destroy
the only town that ever loved them?
Hold up, wait, I have the
real footage of what happened!
It was the Crashers!
They were invisible
We saw what happened!
You did this.
We won't fight back.
Just don't hurt us!
We're not monsters.
I have the footage!
Are you gonna believe some
Hulk-kid with a webcam?
I just saw a talking raccoon in a movie.
They can make anything look real!
It's all computers and camera tricks!
Don't believe the monsters!
Pilot: Surrender, Hulks, now!
I hate to say it, but we need to run.
Hulk: We were impulsive!
We acted like amateurs!
- Arguing is pointless.
- Shut it, Skaar!
- It all Red's fault!
- I wasn't even supposed to be here today!
All right, all right!
We were all tired of being monsters.
We wanted to be heroes for a change.
But now, that's over with.
We're back to being beasts!
What do you think, Hulk?
[sighs] I knew the hero thing
wouldn't work.
You know why?
Because we are monsters.
Plain and simple.
- What are you talkin' about?
- What's scarier than one Hulk? Five Hulks.
Long as we're together,
we're gonna smash, destroy.
So for the good of the town,
I'm breaking up the team.
You can't do that, Hulk!
- I don't believe it!
- Some Leader!
I knew he didn't have
the stomach for it!
We're family, all of us!
We're all we have left.
Skaar need family!
Skaar have no home.
- Sorry.
Made my decision.
- But, Hulk
Alone, we're destructive, but
together, we could wipe out the planet.
[thudding]
Red: Oh, great! What now!
Earthquake?
No way! We put in
those new stabilizers!
- Red: The Leader's still here?
- Hulk: It was a diversion!
He wanted us out of the base!
Finally, you catch on.
I'd compliment you,
if you weren't two steps
behind my genius, as always.
Now, of course, I could
have escaped far earlier,
but I chose to wait until
you achieved hero status,
to ensure your failure was spectacular.
Step away from the
gamma reactor, big head!
The Leader: Gladly, but it's too late.
I've already set the device
to go to critical mass.
I'm using all of its energy for this!
A wormhole to another galaxy, built from
scraps cobbled together in mere hours.
Brilliant, is it not?
Unfortunately, the residual
gamma power will wipe out
what's left of Vista Verde,
and half the state.
Of course, I'll be halfway across
the cosmos while you take the blame!
Unless you care to follow me.
[groaning] No!
The reactor's gonna explode!
I'll handle this.
The rest of you, get out.
Now!
- Not this time.
- We won't leave you, Hulk!
I said get out! Right now!
Earth needs you!
More than it needs me.
Red: Don't do it greenie!
[straining]
Too much radiation.
[grunts] Can't do it.
You can with us!
Red: Not letting ya hog
all the glory this time!
Skaar never leave Hulk again!
Let's do this, before
the wormhole shuts down!
Ah!
[screaming]
[all groaning]
[sighs]
- What happened?
- Where are we?
[sniffing]
Skaar
Skaar know this smell.
What are we wearing? Armor?
This is freaking me out, dudes!
All right, take it easy, I'll
have us outta here in no time.
Man, what are these
walls made out of?
Okay, what are these?
Won't [groans]
Come off.
Ow!
Painful little sucker!
[cheering]
Uh, that ain't our sky.
That wormhole must have spit
us out on an alien world.
Ya think? How we supposed
to get back home?
Home.
Skaar know this place.
Skaar home!
No wonder you don't remember it.
Subjects of Sakaar!
Bow your head, for the emperor
of the world has at last returned!
I give you your king, the Leader!
[crowd cheering]
[gasps]
It can't be!
Our great and powerful liege
has not come home empty-handed!
He has brought us a gift!
The Hulk and his Agents of S.
M.
A.
S.
H.
,
who will fight for their lives
in the grand arena of Sakaar!
[crowd cheering]