Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
♪ There's a hundred and four days of summer vacation
♪ And school comes along just to end it
♪ So the annual problem for our generation
♪ Is finding a good way to spend it
♪ Like maybe
♪ Building a rocket, or fighting a mummy
♪ Or climbing up the Eiffel Tower
♪ Discovering something that doesn't exist
Hey!
♪ Or giving a monkey a shower
♪ Surfing tidal waves
♪ Creating nano-bots or locating Frankenstein's brain
It's over here!
♪ Finding a dodo bird Painting a continent
♪ Or driving our sister insane
Phineas!
♪ As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do
♪ Before school starts this fall
Come on, Perry!
♪ So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all!
♪ So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! ♪
Mom! Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!
Oh, rapture! This is my favorite part
of the Danville Harbor Day festival!
The annual shark reenactment. Let's checketh it out.
Checketh it out? Really?
I stand by my Old English.
Oh, look, they're doing the song.
♪ Won't you gather round and hear a tale of the shark at Danville Harbor?
♪ Who terrorized our people Can you just imagine this?
♪ If it's sharks you want to know about You're bound to end up smarter
♪ Because though technically a vertebrate, they're cartilaginous
♪ The monster came upon us And his its eyes were black as coal
♪ His jaw so big that we could see his molars and incisors
♪ He came at us and of our bladders we did lose control
♪ But he ate a politician and a curriculum advisor
♪ He cornered us in Miller's Cove
♪ We thought that we were dead
♪ We'd never seen his like Remember, this was way before TV
♪ We lost control again There were a long line for the head
Open up!
♪ Then the womenfolk banged pots and pans
(GROANING)
♪ And drove him out to sea
♪ Yes, the womenfolk banged pots and pans and drove him out to sea ♪
And that is why we celebrate Harbor Day every year with a reenactment.
Here cometh the shark.
Look at me, I'm a shark! I can poop in the ocean!
But you're not going to, right?
Keep pushing, dweeb.
Wow, they really should put more effort into the shark.
Ferb, I knoweth what we're going to doeth today.
Hey, whereith is Perry?
Happy Harbor Day, Agent P.
In honor of the occasion, we've flooded your headquarters.
Hope you like it.
Actually, our plumbing just backed up.
Just trying to put a happy face on it, Carl.
Doofenshmirtz has been spotted on a boat. Go check it out.
Brother, these Harbor Days festivals are so lame.
I can't wait to see this year's lame-o replica
of the Great White Shark of Danville Harbor.
It's always so feeble.
Yeah.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
(HELICOPTER APPROACHING)
(GASPS) What's that?
PHINEAS: Okay, let 'er drop! Right...
Okay, now how did that only hit me?
Look at that.
Let's go, Ferb.
We're gonna give this Harbor Day's reenactment the best shark ever.
(GROWLS) Come on, Stacy, we've got a shark to bust.
So I says keep your hands off me poop deck, then we'll keelhaul the scurvy...
Yo-ho, Captain Kidd! We need your ship! My brothers are in that shark!
'Tis the same beast that swallowed my leg.
Yeah, yeah, that's fascinating. Tell me after we shove off.
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
Yeah.
Uh-huh! Sure.
(SNORES)
He won't give up his seat for little old ladies on the bus.
Yeah, I know. He sounds like a bad guy.
Oh, you think?
PHINEAS: Okay, Ferb, let's see what this baby can do.
Looks like everything's shark-shape.
Bank left. Let's get our cartilaginous vertebrae on.
on a crab boat! ♪ ♪ Doofenshmirtz CHORUS:
Perry the Platypus!
(CHATTERING)
So, what am I doing out here? Well, I'll tell you.
One day, while I was perusing my collection of 19th-century almanacs,
I learned that the leading cause of tooth decay is saltwater taffy.
And that's why I invented the Saltwater-Taffyinator!
You can't see it from here.
I built it on the bottom of the ocean
where I have an unlimited supply of saltwater for free.
I'm going to make the sweetest, gooiest,
stickiest saltwater taffy in the (IN DISTANCE) world!
(NORMAL) In the world.
Enough to give cavities to every kid in the tri-state area!
(CHUCKLES) Now where's my wet suit?
Where are they? All I need is a metal shark and a mom to bust her by.
That one's got some wind in her sails.
You have no idea. So, did a shark really eat your leg?
Arr, probably. But he definitely chewed on my arm.
Uh... That's just a birthmark.
I'm tired of this conversation.
Thar she blows!
I see you, Mr. Beast!
CANDACE: Can't this tub go any faster?
There be only one captain on this ship.
Looks like the reenactment has started.
Let's give 'em a run for their money, Ferb!
They're still on our tail!
He be toyin' with us.
Aye!
Cannonball, Ferb.
STACY: Well, at least we'll all get wet.
Really? Really?
Arr, it's the octopus that ate me pancreas!
Thank you.
CAPTAIN SQUINT: Get back here, beast.
(STACY AND CANDACE SCREAM)
Wow, six skips. Nice going.
Here we go.
(GRUNTS) Okay, that hurt.
All right, better just, uh... Okay, I'm good.
And now I will activate my Saltwater-Taffyinator.
At last! Now nothing can prevent me from promoting tooth decay!
(LAUGHS) Oh, I fogged up my mask again.
Perry the Platypus? How did you get out?
Hah! I grabbed you while you were flashing back to your escape! (LAUGHS)
(GRUNTS)
BOTH: Yikes!
I caught many a fish with this lure!
Take the pole and I'll man the wheel!
BOTH: Whoa!
Come on, Stacy, pull!
♪ She bought me coat And the mermaid bought my boots ♪
(LAUGHS) Tug on this, beast.
(CANDACE AND STACY SCREAM)
Supper time!
Bullseye!
Rubber ducks? Are you serious?
Does a penguin fly?
No.
Oh, now I'm tired of this conversation, too.
STACY: The ducks are back!
I'll harpoon the beast.
That's a plunger.
I didn't buy this ship for its plumbing!
DOOFENSHMIRTZ: (YELLS) Swim for your life!
Come to papa, beast!
Well, I ain't really your papa, I never had kids of me own, see?
And if I did, they probably wouldn't be sharks.
But you know what I mean. Uh-oh! (EXCLAIMS)
Hey, she breaches...
We're gonna need a bigger captain.
(SPLUTTERS)
Cheese and sausage?
So this is what the inside of a shark looks like?
I always thought it would be more stomach-y.
I think maybe it's time we just called it quits.
Stacy, I'm tired of this conversation.
(LAUGHS) I still have the upper hand.
Well, actually, you may at this particular...
Chew first, Perry the... Ah!
Hoist the main sail! Swab the poop deck!
Watch that jib, sailor! Now take the helm.
I've got a date with destiny, and it ain't gonna end with a kiss!
You've vexed me for too long. Too long!
Full speed ahead, Stacy! Get me in close!
Captain!
Captain. Yikes! What is it about that hat?
From Danville Harbor I stab at thee!
For busting's sake I spit my last spit at thee! (SPITS)
Head for shore, Stacy! We got 'em!
PHINEAS: Say, whoever is on that boat has the story wrong.
They're supposed to drive us out to sea, not drag us into shore.
Looks like we're gonna need a bigger shark.
DOOFENSHMIRTZ: Now I wish I'd made that off button
more accessible from the taffy itself.
Ah, I wonder how this is affecting the surface water.
CANDACE: Is that the best you've got?
I found more harpoons! And I'm gonna pretend these have never been used.
Load the cannon! Stand clear!
(CLICKS TONGUE) Yep.
(EXCLAIMS) I know you be in there!
I'm getting us out of here, boys.
We need more power, Ferb.
Hard a-starboard, Stacy! Okay, that's port, but whatever!
Arr. Arr.
You know it's such a shame that the reenactment can't be this exciting.
(LAUGHS) Free at last! Thanks for me new leg, boys!
Mom! Mom! Look, Mom!
Look, Mom! Look at the shark! Mom!
What? Oh, that? They get cheesier every year.
Roar!
You cannot attack me. I am the tail!
Shark wedgie!
That's not what I meant.
It never is, honey. Who wants blood pudding?
ALL: Me!
DOOFENSHMIRTZ: You know, this much I could have predicted.
But I'm having a hard time explaining the giant metal shark.
(SIGHS) Well, at least we'll go together, Perry the Platypus.
Oh, sure. I reach out to you and then you do the emergency faceplate ejector thing.
Curse you, Perry the Plat...
...ypus.
Hey, Candace. What are you doing out here?
Hey, Stacy.
I've got a lot that I wanna do today, so I figured I'd bust Phineas and Ferb early.
You know, just to get it off my plate.
How long have you been out here?
Since last night.
Yeah, well, who are those guys?
I don't know. Who are you guys?
I thought you were waiting in line for concert tickets.
This is my backyard.
There's always some kind of concert going on back here. I just thought...
Get out of my yard!
MAN: Not a morning person.
So what's this big thing you wanted to do?
Well, remember when Jeremy made that romantic dinner for me?
Candace, he microwaved you a pizza.
Yeah. A pizza for two.
Ah, yes.
So I wanna reciprocate and make him a romantic dinner.
Are you sure? Candace, I don't know a lot about cooking.
Well, neither do I, but I figured we'll use what you know and what I know.
And between the two of us we can figure it out, right?
Hmm. Why not? Now where's the cooking room?
It's in the kitchen. That's where we keep all those cooking tools.
(RUMBLING)
(WHIRRING)
PHINEAS: Hey, Candace. We're going to the moon.
The moon? Wait a minute. Why are you going to the moon?
Kind of a step backward, considering you've already been to Mars.
Do you remember that old nursery rhyme, The Cat and the Fiddle?
Vaguely.
Apparently, there was a last verse that was lost to history
until Ferb and I found it in the Dead Sea.
It's a little wet and salty but I'll read it.
"Hey, *** *** The cat and the fiddle The cow jumped over the moon
"Due to the moon's low gravity
"The moon-jumping cow's milk produced the best tasting ice cream ever"
That last verse didn't rhyme so they left it out of most versions.
Ferb and I are going to the moon to see if it's true.
Don't you need some cows for that?
We do indeed.
MALE VOICE: Moo. Cows, get on the ship.
Okay, that's the dumbest thing I... (SCREAMS)
Phineas and Ferb! I'm going to count down backwards from 10
and when I'm done you'd better be down here so I can bust you.
Ten, nine, eight, seven...
Ah. Let us get to our stations!
...six, five, four, three, two...
One.
Hey, where's Perry?
Morning, Agent P. Our sources tell us that Doof is up to something.
We need you to infiltrate Doofenschmirtz Evil Incorporated
and have a little look-see.
To make it easier for you to get in,
we had one of our operatives install a Central Access Threshold or C.A.T. door.
So let's get out there and good luck.
CARL: So now I'm an operative?
We're still not paying you, Carl.
Remember, everyone, the moon's gravity is 83.3% less than Earth's.
So what?
So what? So let's bounce. Whee!
Oh, no, Buford, please do not drop me. I... Oh, ooh, this is not so bad.
Yeah? Give it a second.
(THUDS)
BALJEET: (GRUNTS) How is it possible you are actually heavier on the moon?
CHORUS: ♪ Doofenschmirtz Evil Incorporated! ♪
Perry the Platypus.
What? Oh, yes, the green. (CHUCKLES) I can explain.
It started two days ago when I was watering my plant.
I noticed a beautiful garden on my neighbor's balcony.
Oh, I got so jealous.
So the guy at the store told me, among other things,
that my plant wouldn't grow because I didn't have a green thumb.
And that I should stop bothering with all these plant questions,
and that my mere presence in the store was destroying his plants.
So I got a big bucket of green paint and I poured it on myself.
Then I was green everywhere except, strangely, my thumbs.
I think it was the way I was holding the bucket.
Anyhoo, I came up with another great idea.
I created the Moisture-Suckinator!
See, see? I don't know why I built it here when I was gonna use it on the balcony.
That wasn't...
Anyhoo, this device will suck all the moisture out of my neighbor's plants,
which will turn them brown, making my plants look greener by comparison.
And I will finally have a green thumb.
You know, not actually, metaphorically I'll have it a...
Oh, it's a metaphor! (GROANS) Oh, and I wasted all that money on green paint.
PHINEAS: Okay, nice job, everyone. Now the cows have a place to live.
But what will the cows eat?
Oh, not to worry.
After scientists discovered the existence of frozen water on the moon,
Ferb and I began shooting seeds up here.
Then we shot up hundreds of these pocket warmers to melt the ice in the ground.
But, Phineas, there is no oxygen here.
That's all right. The grass will create its own oxygen through photosynthesis.
Yes, but you would still need to... Ooh, or not.
We've got our grass, Ferb. Let's get the herd fed.
MALE VOICE: Moo. Cows, lunch time.
(MOOING)
(WHIRRING)
CANDACE: Oh, my gosh, Stacy, your cooking hat looks so cute.
Yours, too.
IRVING: Mission Control to Moon Farm.
What's that?
Come in, Moon Farm.
PHINEAS: This is Moon Farm. Come back.
Oh! Oh, this is Mission Control.
Your transmission is a little garbled, but still understandable. Over.
Hey! Just what do you think you're doing?
Yeah, she was just...
(STAMMERS) Give me that. Phineas, you are so busted.
Oh, hi, Candace. How's the cooking for Jeremy going?
Hey, ask him what we should cook.
PHINEAS: Roger that, Stacy.
Ferb suggests lamb cobbler on account of Jeremy's British background.
We don't have that recipe.
That's okay. Ferb knows it by heart.
You and Stacy go to the kitchen
and we'll relay the recipe step-by-step through Mission Control.
All right. But I'm still busting you. I'm still busting them.
Ferb says the first thing they'll need is a big bowl. Over.
Roger. Mission Control out.
make it look pretty. Well, I guess that will A big bow. Hmm.
(GRUNTING) That's right. I got this.
Ah, man, why didn't I put wheels on this thing?
(GRUNTING) There. I'll just aim it, ah, there. Perfect.
Now you will witness the dehydrating effect
of my Moisture-Suckinator on my neighbor's garden.
And fire!
Oh, that, that doesn't seem to be working.
Let me try it on something else. Hmm!
(GRUNTING)
This is going to hurt you more than it's gonna hurt me, Perry the Platypus. Fire!
(SMACKING LIPS)
Ha, ha! Oh, look at you. You're Pruny the Dehydrapus.
Hmm. I wonder why it didn't do that to my neighbor's plants.
Maybe it's too far away. Maybe... (GROANS) I'm just... I've got to try it again.
I'm not gonna let that guy make me look like a nincom... Oh, poop.
(SMACKS LIPS)
I'm going to go get a glass of water. (SMACKS LIPS)
Do you want one, Perry the Platypus?
This doesn't seem right, Candace. I mean, four eggs bleeded,
a big bow, one pound of lamp. I mean that's not even food.
Trust me, Stacy, as annoying as Phineas and Ferb are, they're usually right.
IRVING: Phineas and Ferb say...
Uh, not in the house.
Phineas and Ferb say three cups of self-righteous flowers.
You see? That's what I'm talking about.
Self-righteous flowers? What are self-righteous flowers?
Well, roses always seem stuck up to me.
Okay, so let's go pick some roses.
BUFORD: Moon.
(COW MOOS)
Moo-nah. Two syllables, cow. Two. Moo-nah.
(MOOS)
Man, these cows are dumb.
Ah, that's much better. I was parched. How about you?
We should do this more often. This was nice.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna jetpack over to my neighbor's balcony
and see what's going on with those plants...
Right after I change my pants.
So, what's next, Irving?
Phineas and Ferb say bake at 350 for one hour.
Serves two. Speaking of "serves two," I was thinking,
you know, after you girls are done here maybe we can...
Okay, that's cool. We'll, we'll just put a pin in it for now.
Stacy, what are we gonna do? Jeremy will be here in five minutes.
Relax, Candace, it's simple math.
Instead of 350 for one hour,
we'll just cook this for five minutes at...
9,000 degrees. What could go wrong?
Okay, everyone, ice cream's ready.
Let's dig in.
Mmm, this is the best ice cream I've ever had.
MALE REGGAE SPACE VOICE: Oh, that's right!
♪ Houston, we've got a situation
FEMALE SINGER: ♪ Better stay by the phone
♪ It's a brand new lunar taste sensation
♪ Served on a waffle cone We've got chocolate, vanilla
♪ But we don't have rocky road
♪ It's not that we don't like it
♪ We left the marshmallows at home I blame Baljeet... ♪
Hey! What do you mean you blame Baljeet?
Well, it was clearly your responsibility.
Where are you getting all your information from,
disembodied reggae space voice?
Hey, I have a name, you know!
Oh, yeah, what is it?
Well, it's Disembodied Reggae Space Voice, but that's just a coincidence.
You didn't know that.
Oh, look who's sensitive. Besides, Buford could have brought the marshmallows.
Hey, leave me out of this.
Guys, guys, we have a limited time here.
Baljeet, could you please stop arguing with the sound track.
He started it.
Hey, you, I've got a question for you.
How do you get your plants... What? Plastic.
Is there something I can help you with, rocket man?
Yeah. What's with all the plastic plants and the plastic man?
I like plastic.
Oh, so, you're just trying to make me look like a fool.
Well, I don't need you for... (EXCLAIMS)
...that. I'll just take the stairs.
I don't know, Stacy, I've got a bad feeling about this.
What am I gonna do if it isn't even edible?
Well, technically it is English food.
Well, here goes. (GASPS) Lamb cobbler. And it's beautiful.
How could that be? We didn't even put lamb in it.
Phineas and Ferb, what's going on out here?
Hi, Candace. We brought you some moon cow ice cream.
I don't care if you brought me ice cream from the moon,
when Mom sees this spaceship in the yard, you two will be so busted.
Huh. So, how do you think our cows will do on the moon?
Well, photosynthesis will start creating oxygen,
and then eventually an atmosphere.
Our bovine friends will be fine.
Cool. We know where to go for ice cream.
(GASPS) It's all dried out.
Hey, everybody.
Jeremy, I... You're here.
Hey, Candace. It's really nice of you to make something for me.
I can't wait to see what you've come up with.
CANDACE: Oh, I... (CHUCKLES) Yeah, uh...
JEREMY: Well, I'll bet it's great.
Um, here's the thing. It's, uh... I just don't know if you'll like it.
Ooh, ice cream.
What? Oh, (CHUCKLES) yeah. Ice cream for two.
DOOFENSHMIRTZ: Uh, Perry the Platypus. (NERVOUS CHUCKLE)
Yeah, I'm, uh... I'm over here.
Yeah, I, uh, I forgot my keys so I thought that, uh, you know,
I could just fit through the, uh... Oh, good.
You're gonna go get the building super?
Maybe tell him that I'm up here and...
Hey, what's that? That better not be a "Do not disturb" sign.
Curse you, Perry the Platypus!
This is the best ice cream I've ever had.
MALE REGGAE SPACE VOICE: Oh, that's right!
♪ Houston, we've got a situation
FEMALE SINGER: ♪ Better stay by the phone
♪ It's a brand new lunar taste sensation
♪ Served on a waffle cone We've got chocolate, vanilla
♪ But we don't have rocky road
♪ It's not that we don't like it
♪ We left the marshmallows at home I blame Baljeet... ♪
BALJEET: Hey! I thought we discussed this earlier.
It's in the lyrics, man.