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Global Dialogues
I'm a counselor.
I'm the president of an organization.
I'm a husband and a father.
I'm a wife and a mother.
And we are all living with ***.
The beginning of it all was really hard, the biggest shock of my life.
When I saw my test result - *** positive! -
I just wanted to scream in despair, and to cry every tear I had.
I wanted to believe that it was a mistake, or maybe just a bad dream.
That result was like a swan song announcing the imminent end of my life.
I felt alone, like a nomad lost in the desert, tormented by the wind,
not knowing where to find water, or shelter, or even a path that would lead me home.
And then, for many, many days, all I felt was fear and loneliness. I was just empty.
I asked myself all the time: Why did this happen to me? WHY?!
I was afraid of everything. I was even afraid to look at myself in the mirror.
I feared the reaction of my family and friends. Everyone would surely be ashamed of me.
So, I cut myself off from the rest of the world.
I blamed myself. And I blamed him, too.
The future didn't exist for me any more. It was all over.
My hopes and dreams had all died.
What good was it to make any plans for the future? It was the end.
And then one day, I was in my bedroom, alone, on the edge of an abyss.
The radio was keeping me company. Suddenly, a line in a song caught my attention:
As long as there are stars in your heart and in the sky, happiness is a sure thing.
The stars are sparkling dots where hope glimmers as long as there is life.
As I looked at a photo of my mother,
I remembered something she would always tell me if something was troubling me when I was little:
"If you want to see the rainbow, you must first make it through the storm."
I had a decision to make: Either stay in a state of total distress, or fight.
It was all up to me.
So, I said to myself as I looked in the mirror: "Stop sitting around, and get down to work!"
I found within myself strength I didn't know I had,
the will to rebuild everything, to overcome this obstacle.
I discovered sources of strength and hope all around me:
My family. My children.
My friends. My faith. With God, everything is possible.
Scientific and medical progress. Support organisations for people living with ***.
Why not go back and talk with that friendly counselor at the test center?
She did tell me that I was always welcome there.
I knew that some people would disappoint me, because discrimination does still exist.
However, there are always people around that you can count on.
You've just got to find them. They're out there!
Talking about your problems helps to avoid the worst.
So, I gathered up my courage and opened up to others.
On the one hand, it did hurt when some people rejected me.
But nothing that those people say or do can bring me down,
because of the support that I've found among others.
Their love completely changed my life.
This morning, my five-year-old son climbed up on my knees,
just to give me a kiss and say hello. Now that's really strong medicine!
I'd like to dedicate a trophy to my parents and friends,
whose generosity and support always help me in all my pursuits.
Now, I have a new mindset. I've reinvented myself.
I've refocused my heart and my mind.
I accept my status. I live with ***, and that's that.
I may have *** in my body, but I've removed the *** from my mind.
I've freed myself!
I've forgiven myself. Her too.
Him too.
I'm strong. I believe in myself, and nothing can change that!
I stand tall in the face of all challenges. I never throw in the towel.
I pursue my dreams with joy, with energy and with optimism.
I'm useful! Lots of people need me:
my family and friends, my colleagues, as well as other people living with ***.
They can count on me, and that makes me really strong.
I've made my choice: to live positively.
When they told me that my test had come back positive,
I felt massive pressure pushing down on me.
The other day, I told a friend about that,
and he told me with a smile that pressure is what makes diamonds.
My friends and family support and encourage me in everything I do.
Never in all my life have I felt so surrounded with love.
It's strange, but thanks to my new mindset, I live better than ever.
I've even noticed that I live more fully than most ***-negative people I know!
My future shines like the sun!
And now, every second, I live life to the fullest!
They live with ***, and they are...
My confidant, my friend!
Our boss. Our brother.
My wife.
My husband.
My parents.
Mommy!
Global Dialogues