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CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY PARAMOUNT PICTURES CORPORATION
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?
WHAT'S IT LOOK LIKE?
LAURIE, PLEASE, JUST CALM DOWN.
I'M CALM.
YOU BELIEVE HER OVER ME, RIGHT?
YES, I DO.
WHY?
BECAUSE YOU'RE A LIAR, JERRY.
SHE WENT TO CLEVELAND WITH ME ON BUSINESS.
SHE'S MY ASSISTANT, FOR GOD'S SAKE.
YOU USED TO TRAVEL WITH ME, REMEMBER?
YEAH, I REMEMBER.
OH, COME ON. THAT WAS DIFFERENT.
I LOVED YOU!
YOU LOVED ME?
YES, I LOVED YOU, LAURIE.
I LOVED YOU THEN, I LOVE YOU NOW.
LAURIE, LOOK...
COULD YOU JUST RELAX A MINUTE?
CAN WE JUST...
LET'S JUST TALK THIS...
CAN WE TALK THIS THROUGH?
WHAT ABOUT THE PICTURES, JERRY?
PICTURES?
WHAT PICTURES?
WHAT PICTURES DO YOU THINK?
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
OF COURSE YOU DON'T.
ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT.
LET'S SEE THEM.
LET'S SEE THESE PICTURES.
I'LL SEND YOU THE 8 x 10s.
WE WERE IN CLEVELAND.
WE WERE PARTYING.
WE HAD SOME PEOPLE UP TO THE SUITE.
WE!
WE HAD SOME PEOPLE UP TO THE SUITE.
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
LAURIE, IT WAS BUSINESS.
MIXING BUSINESS WITH PLEASURE,
ISN'T THAT YOUR SPECIALTY?
I DON'T NEED PHOTOGRAPHS
TO FIGURE OUT WHAT WAS GOING ON.
ALL RIGHT.
LAURIE, LOOK...
WHAT?
I WAS LONELY.
YOU'VE BEEN BUSY SINCE YOUR PROMOTION.
I DON'T LOVE JANE.
BELIEVE ME,
I WAS ALWAYS THINKING OF YOU.
OH! THAT MAKES IT O.K.
ON SECOND THOUGHT,
MAYBE THERE WEREN'T ANY PICTURES.
[GLASS BREAKS]
WHAT A JERK.
I HAVE A HISTORY OF JERKS.
YOU SHOULD ORGANIZE A SELECTION COMMITTEE.
TRY TO WEED OUT THE SOCIOPATHS
BEFORE YOU MAKE YOUR NEXT CHOICE.
I GAVE A YEAR AND A HALF TO THAT CREEP.
YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOUR PROBLEM IS?
WHAT IS MY PROBLEM, AL?
YOU ARE THE PERFECT WASP-ATBA.
WASP A-T-B-A.
WHITE ANGLO-SAXON PROTESTANT AFRAID TO BE ALONE.
I HAVE SO BEEN ALONE.
WHEN?
AFTER MICHAEL.
I HAD THAT APARTMENT ON RIVERSIDE.
THAT'S RIGHT.
THE ONE YOU STAYED IN ALMOST A MONTH.
I MET BARTON RIGHT AFTER THAT.
OH, BARTON!
I THOUGHT HE HAD POTENTIAL.
LET ME TELL YOU ONE MORE TIME, LAUR.
YOU'RE TOO ONE-MAN MINDED.
YOU ZERO IN TOO QUICKLY ON YOUR TARGET.
OH, LOOK.
THAT MAN CROSSING THE STREET.
HE'S NICE-LOOKING.
MAYBE WE COULD LIVE TOGETHER.
SHUT UP.
DO WHAT I DO--
PLAY THE FIELD A WHILE.
ALISON, YOU DON'T PLAY THE FIELD.
YOU PLAY THE WHOLE STADIUM.
OOH!
TRUE.
MY ASSISTANT WORKED ON THAT ONE.
OH, GOOD.
HE'LL BE HAPPY TO HEAR THAT.
WELL, WE COULD GET THOSE, UH...
BLUEPRINTS TO YOU BY THE BEGINNING OF NEXT WEEK.
UH-HUH.
THANK YOU, MR. KATZ.
BYE.
HI.
HI.
WHAT'D YOU DO TO YOUR HAND?
CUT MYSELF SHAVING.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING TONIGHT?
YOU ARE SO PREDICTABLE.
LAURIE...
LAURIE, LOOK.
I REALLY FEEL BADLY ABOUT WHAT I DID.
YOU SHOULD.
I DO.
I COULDN'T SLEEP LAST NIGHT.
I WANT TO TALK THIS THROUGH.
I WANT TO HAVE DINNER WITH YOU TONIGHT.
IS THAT AN ORDER?
I'M NOT YOUR ASSISTANT.
WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
SO WHERE AREOU GOING TO LIVE?
MY PLACE.
WHERE'S THAT?
I'M GETTING A REALTOR THIS AFTERNOON.
HEY, JERRY, THERE'S A PHONE CALL FOR YOU.
TELL HER TO TAKE A MESSAGE.
THANK YOU, MAX.
YOU CAN KEEP THE COUCH.
I WANT THE CHINA CLOSET,
THE CEDAR CHEST, THE TV.
THE BED YOU CAN BURN.
LAURIE...
I LO
THAT'S A PROMISE.
THAT'S NOT A PROMISE.
THAT'S A THR
WE'RE NOT THROUGH YET.
YOU O.K.?
■■
YEAH.
THANKS.
HEY, WHY DON'T YOU, UH...
GIVE THESE TO, UH, WHAT'S-HER-NAME?
SUSAN.
SUSAN.
SHE'S ALLERGIC.
ME, TOO.
I'LL FIND A HOME FOR THEM.
THANKS.
EXCUSE ME.
UH, THIS FELL OUT OF THE FLOWERS.
I DON'T KNOW IF YOU NEEDED IT.
THANKS.
SO, UM, WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND HERE?
THREATS,
ACCUSATIONS,
THE USUAL OFFICE CHITCHAT.
SHE DIDN'T LIKE THE FLOWERS?
SHE DIDN'T LIKE THE GUY THAT DELIVERED THEM.
EXCUSE ME.
THIS ONE I KNOW U'RE GOING TO LOVE.
THE BUILDING IS PRE-WORLD WAR--
ONE, I MEAN.
IT WAS BUILT AS LUXURY HOUSING,
BUT IN THE FIFTIES,
SOMEONE CUT ALL THE TMENTS IN HALF.
THEY'RE MOSTLY EMPTY NOW,
BUT THE OWNER HAS PERMISSION TO GENTRIFY.
HE'S GOING TO RECOMBINE ALL THE APARTMENTS
TO THEIR ORIGINAL SIZES.
SO WHAT'S WRONG WITH THEM?
WRONG?
WHO SAYS THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG?
YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO USE YOUR IMAGINATION.
YOU'RE JOKING, RIGHT?
AND VERY ANIMAL-FRIENDLY.
UH, YOU HAVE PETS?
INSULATION.
THESE WALLS ARE 3 FEET THICK.
THEY REALLY KNEW HOW TO INSULATE BACK THEN.
WELL, NO, THEY DIDN'T.
THAT'S WHY THE WALLS ARE 3 FEET THICK.
BUT I DARE YOU...
I DARE YOU...
TO FIND A DRAFT ANYWHERE IN THIS PLACE.
AND PRIVACY?
OOF!
YOU COULD HAVE WHAT'S-HIS-NAME,
BRUCE, UH, SPRINGSTERN PLAYING RIGHT HERE
WHILE YOU WERE IN THE NEXT ROOM.
YOU WOULDN'T HEAR ANYTHING,
NOT THAT YOU'D WANT TO.
DOROTHY, HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN EMPTY?
I DON'T KNOW.
15 YEARS.
THESE PLACES ARE VERY HARD TO RENT,
LET ALONE SELL.
PEOPLE DON'T SEE THE POSSIBILITIES.
OH, MY...
RUST!
LEAKING PIPES.
THEY CAN FIX THAT.
I HAVE SOMETHING YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE.
TRUST ME.
I DON'T MAKE BIG MONEY FOR NOTHING.
WAIT TILL YOU SEE THIS.
WOW. NOW, THAT'S INCREDIBLE.
WHAT DID I SAY?
IT'S TO DIE FOR.
AND...
■■
WHAT ABOUT...
THAT DETAIL?
YOU WON'T FIND THAT JUST ANYWHERE, WILL YOU?
WELL...
I DON'T KNOW.
THIS NEEDS
SO HIRE A DESIGNER.
DO IT YOURSELF.
YOU'VE GOT THE IMAGINATION.
OH, AREN'T CHALLENGES WONDERFUL?
DAMN.
■■
UH, EXCUSE ME.
OH, I'M SORRY.
I WAS JUST BEING A LITTLE NOSY.
GOOD NIGHT.
I'D MOVE THIS ONE WALL IF I WERE YOU.
WHAT WALL?
YOU COULD GET A WHOLE LOT MORE SPACE
IF THAT ONE WALL SWUNG AROUND 90 DEGREES.
UH...
I KNOW IT'S NONE OF MY BUSINESS,
BUT BOTH BATHROOMS DON'T HAVE TO BE THAT BIG.
IF YOU JUST PUT A SHOWER IN THE ONE
AND TEAR DOWN THAT WALL,
YOU COULD DOUBLE THE SIZE OF YOUR MASTER BEDROOM.
ARE YOU AN ARCHITECT?
NO.
ARE YOU?
I'M AN INDUSTRIAL DESIGNER.
I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
AH.
SO HOW COME YOU'RE TEARING DOWN A BEARING WALL?
WHAT?
THIS, RIGHT HERE.
THAT'S PROBABLY A SUPPORTING WALL,
SO UNLESS YOU PUT STEEL BEAMS IN THERE,
YOU'LL HAVE YOUR CEILING ON YOUR LIVING ROOM FLOOR.
IT'S JUST A SKETCH.
I'M TAKING IT TO A PROFESSIONAL
TO LOOK IT OVER.
FOR HOW MUCH?
I DON'T KNOW. I HAVEN'T PRICED ONE YET.
I'LL DO IT FOR HALF.
WHAT MAKES YOU SO QUALIFIED?
HERE.