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(John H.) IT'S THAT TIME, AMERICA!
WHAT GOES UP MUST WIPE OUT.
"WIPEOUT," YOU'RE GOIN' DOWN!
(John A.) AND WIPEOUT THEY WILL,
(trills)
BING!
ON THE WORLD'S LARGEST AND MOST EXTRAORDINARY OBSTACLE COURSE.
WE'LL SEE MAGNIFICENT FALLS...
SENSATIONAL TUMBLES...
AND ASTONISHING SPILLS.
ONLY OUR MIGHTIEST FOUR WILL ADVANCE
TO THE MOST CHALLENGING OBSTACLE COURSE OF ALL--
THE WIPEOUT ZONE.
(woman) AAH!
ONE WILL BECOME A CHAMPION, BUT ALL...
WILL WIPEOUT.
(woman) UGH!
HELLO, AMERICA, AND WELCOME TO "WIPEOUT."
I'M JOHN ANDERSON,
AND JOINING ME AGAIN BY CONTRACTUAL OBLIGATION
YOU HAVE A CONTRACT?
I DO.
AND WE HAVE AN AGREEMENT WITH OUR 24 CONTESTANTS
WHO ARE ABOUT TO TAKE ON
THE WORLD'S BIGGEST OBSTACLE COURSE.
I DON'T EVEN HAVE A KEY CARD.
BUT BEFORE THEY CAN GET THEIR HANDS ON THE CASH,
THEY'LL HAVE TO COMPLETE OUR ALL-NEW "WIPEOUT" QUALIFIER.
(doorbell rings)
I THINK SOMETHING LURKS BEHIND THOSE DOORS.
IT'S GON' GET YOU, SUCKA!
IS IS JUST ME OR DO THE BALLS SEEM JUMPY?
HOW ABOUT SOME CRIES WITH THAT SHAKE?
IT'S LIKE A COOKIE CUTTER,
ONLY YOU'RE THE COOKIE.
AND YOU'RE MY SPRINKLE.
OF OUR 24 COMPETITORS, ONLY THOSE WITH THE TOP 12 TIMES
ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO DOWN
TO THE THIRD MEMBER OF OUR "WIPEOUT" TEAM, JILL WAGNER.
SHE'S WITH OUR FIRST CONTESTANT OF THE DAY.
OKAY, GUYS, I'M DOWN HERE WITH MEGAN SMITH.
AND SHE IS EXCITED TO BE ON "WIPEOUT."
NUMBER ONE.
I GO FIRST. WHOO!
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, MEGAN.
NOW WHAT IS YOUR STRATEGY? WHAT'S YOUR SKILL? TELL ME.
MY STRATEGY IS TO LOOK OVERWEIGHT
BUT TO RUN LIKE A SKINNY PERSON.
BIG BALLS TO THE WALL.
(John A.) MEGAN SMITH AND THAT FLAWLESS STRATEGY,
(John H.) JOHN, WHAT DO SLOW AND UNSTEADY DO IN THE RACE?
MEGAN SMITH TAKING AIM 50 GRAND AND OUR FIRST OBSTACLE,
NOW HOW DOES THIS WORK, JOHNNY?
OKAY, THEN WHAT?
HELLO!
WELL, GETTIN' HIT BY THAT HAMMER.
THIS IS AWESOME!
OH!
ALL RIGHT, SHE'S TALKED THE TALK.
NOW SHE'S WALKING THE WALK OVER AT THE SUCKER PUNCH.
UHH!
YEAH, WHAT WAS MEGAN'S STRATEGY AGAIN?
LOOK OVERWEIGHT BUT TO RUN LIKE A SKINNY PERSON.
SHE DOES RUN LIKE A SKINNY PERSON--
JUST A REALLY SLOW SKINNY PERSON.
HERE SHE GOES.
WHOA! OH!
(John A.) OHH!
LET'S SEE THAT AGAIN IN THE SUPER SLO-MO.
YEAH, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE WALL,
BUT MEGAN GOES BALLS TO THE STOMACH, THE BACK, THE SIDE
AND SEVERAL OTHER PLACES.
WELL, LET'S SEE HOW MEGAN HANDLES THE SHAKE-A-LATOR.
AAH!
AAH!
AAH!
YEAH, IT MIGHT BE HARDER THAN THAT SOUNDS.
AAH!
AND THAT'S WHY THEY CALL IT THE SHAKE-A-LATOR.
(John A.) MAKES PERFECT SENSE TO ME.
AND NOW FROM THE SHAKE-A-LATOR TO THE SHAPE-SHIFTER.
MEGAN WILL GRAB HOLD OF THE ZIP LINE,
SWING ACROSS THE WATER,
PROPEL HERSELF THROUGH ONE OF THESE SHAPES,
LANDING ON THE FINISH PLATFORM. IF SHE WIPES OUT,
(Jill) COME ON, MEGAN! YOU'VE GOT THIS!
(John H.) WELL, YOU KNOW,
SHAPE-SHIFTING IS HER BREAD AND BUTTER, JILL.
(John A.) OH, SHE MADE IT THERE, JOHNNY!
OH, NOT SO GOOD THERE.
YEAH, TO GIVE YOU AN IDEA OF HOW HARD THIS STUNT IS,
WELL, ACCORDING TO OUR ENGINEERS,
YOU CAN GET THROUGH THIS THING.
MEGAN WENT BIG BALLS TO THE WALL FOR THE WHOLE RUN.
SHE FINISHES WITH A TIME OF 10 MINUTES, 22 SECONDS.
(trills)
THAT'S 38 YEAR OLD MOTHER OF 2 DEBBIE MARKHAM.
SUGAR POWER!
JILL FOUND OUT
I LOVE SUGAR!
OKAY, NOW THAT IS HOW YOU'RE GONNA GET THROUGH THE COURSE?
IS THAT GONNA GIVE YOU YOUR ENERGY AND--AND YOUR SKILL?
YES. I'M GONNA WIN "WIPEOUT" ON A SUGAR RUSH, EVERY ROUND. WHOO!
(crunches)
(mouth full) MMM, SO GOOD.
I DO. I HAVE TWO KIDS WHO ALSO LOVE SUGAR.
THEY HAVE THE RIGHT MOM.
(John H.) WOW, PASSING A RICH LEGACY
OF HYPERGLYCEMIA ON TO HER CHILDREN.
AAH!
(John A.) MM! WHO'S YOUR SUGAR DADDY?
YES!
DOOR KNOCK SERVING SUGAR MAMA SOME SUGAR SMACKS.
YEAH, CAREFUL, SUGAR MAMA.
THE SUCKER PUNCH IS AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT KIND OF JAWBREAKER.
UHH!
OH! (laughs)
LET'S SEE THAT IN OUR PATENTED SUPER SLO-MO, JOHN.
DEBBIE TAKES A FACE FULL OF PAINT AND A FIST FULL OF PAIN.
OOH-HOO!
WELL, DEBBIE'S ALL PAINTED UP, MAKING HER WAY TO THE BIG BALLS.
(clank)
SUGAR!
"WOWZERS"?
I'M NOT FAMILIAR WITH ALL YOUR HEPCAT LINGO, GRANDMA.
I BET OUR OLDEST CONTESTANT, 58 YEAR OLD WAYNE COLLINS,
REMEMBERS WHEN THAT WORD WAS HIP, THOUGH.
(clank)
DID HE SAY "PAPA DOG"?
(grunts)
WHAT'S YOUR STRATEGY?
I'M HERE TO SHOW THAT OLD DOGS CAN LEARN NEW TRICKS.
PAPA DOG RULES. YOUNG PUPS DROOL.
(John H.) WHOA! LOOKS LIKE PAPA DOG'S FUR
PAPA DOG CAN DO THIS.
(John A.) LET'S HOPE HE DOESN'T A.A.R.P. IN HIS PANTS
ON THE SHAKE-A-LATOR. WOW, JOHNNY! IT'S NOT EVERY DAY
YOU CAN SAY AN OLD MAN'S THAT NIMBLE ON HIS FEET.
OR HIS FACE.
WELL, AT LEAST HE CAN
CROSS THE SHAKE-A-LATOR OFF HIS BUCKET LIST. WHO'S NEXT?
(whimsical music playing)
OH! OH.
OH, THIS ENERGETIC PUP IS 25 YEAR OLD JENNIFER WILKER.
SHE'S FROM HAWAII, JOHNNY.
WELL, SHE MUST BE EXHAUSTED AFTER THAT TRIP
BECAUSE SHE IS TAKING HER TIME ON HER WAY TO THE BIG BALLS.
(groans) YEAH.
(panting)
OH, MY GOD, THEY MOVE.
THEY'RE NOT THE ONLY THING THAT MOVES, JENNIFER.
YEAH, MEET IT AND THEN, UH, GET OUT OF THE WAY.
AAH!
OH!
JENNIFER IS MY NEW FAVORITE CONTESTANT.
JENNIFER, WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?
YOU KNOW HOW TO DO THE BUS DRIVER DANCE,
(John H.) OH, JOHN, I LOVE THE BUS DRIVER!
LITERALLY. I TOOK ONE TO MY SENIOR PROM.
(horn honks)
(John A.) WELL, JOHN, UH, LET'S SEE IF THOSE SWEET MOVES
HELP JENNIFER OUT ON THE SHAKE-A-LATOR.
NOPE. BUT ON THE BRIGHT SIDE,
SPEAKING OF FAST, HERE COMES DR. JEFF BUENO.
EH, DENTIST.
HE SPOKE WITH JILL EARLIER.
VERY NICE. YOU TAKE GOOD CARE.
I CAN ATTEST. THERE'S NO CAVITIES.
(John A.) THE DOOR KNOCK WILL SEE YOU NOW.
(John H.) OOH! NO BUENO.
I THINK DR. BUENO'S GONNA HAVE SOME INFLAMMATION OF THE GUMS.
YOU KNOW, JOHN,
THE DOOR KNOCK'S BEEN MUY OUCHIE FOR A LOT OF CONTESTANTS TODAY.
AAH!
WHAT'S BEHIND DOOR NUMBER 2?
A HAMMER. IN FACT, NO MATTER WHICH DOOR YOU OPEN...
WE GOT A HAMMER.
AAH!
MAYBE THEY OUGHTA TRY RINGING THE DOORBELL.
BACK TO THE TOP OF THE COURSE,
GESUNDHEIT.
(grunts)
MM-HMM. YEAH.
LIKE A GREAT SAMOAN WARRIOR,
(grunts)
WELL, WHAT DID YOU EXPECT?
THE MAN HAS FACED DOWN ACTIVE VOLCANOES AND WILD SAMOAN BOARS.
AIR, ON THE OTHER HAND, HE HAS NO ANSWER.
LET'S SEE IF HE HAS AN ANSWER FOR THE SUCKER PUNCH.
MAKING HIS WAY ACROSS.
OH!
AAH!
BUT HE KEEPS GOIN'.
THE BIG BALLS!
(high-pitched voice) AAH!
I HAD NO IDEA THE SAMOAN WAR CRY WAS SO GIRLY.
I WONDER IF THEY HAVE A MANLY WAR DANCE.
(singing indistinctly)
(John A.) THEY DO. JILL-- STILL A BUS DRIVER GAL.
HEY!
AND SHE'S DOING A CLUB DANCE.
(John H.) IT'S NOT JUST A CLUB DANCE, JOHNNY.
WELL, LET'S SEE IF THE SAMOAN WAY OF LIFE
HELPS ISAIA OUT ON THE SHAPE-SHIFTER.
(grunts)
(laughs)
OH! THAT WAS SAMOA CLOSE.
(grunts)
THAT'S THE CLOSEST ANYBODY'S GOTTEN TO THE FINAL PLATFORM.
WHOO!
YEAH!
AND HE'LL CELEBRATE WITH A TRADITIONAL SAMOAN SNACK--
THOSE ARE GIRL SCOUT COOKIES.
REALLY, NO CONTRACT. HUH?
MM.
BESIDES, YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY--
MM. FUNNY.
WHEN WE COME BACK,
AAH! WHOA!
♪♪♪
WELCOME BACK TO "WIPEOUT," AMERICA.
THE SUN IS SHINING,
THE CONTESTANTS ARE FALLING, AND JILL...
AW, YEAH! THAT'S IT, JILL!
♪ HONK THE HORN, DRIVE THE BUS ♪
♪ OPEN THE DOOR, WAVE TO THE PASSENGERS ♪
LAST STOP, JOHNNY. GOTTA GET EVERYBODY OFF THE BUS.
THERE YOU GO.
ALL RIGHT, WE'VE GOT A SHOW TO DO. WHO'S NEXT?
♪ AHH, AHH, AHH-AHH-AHH, AHH, AHH, AHH, AHH ♪
THIS IS OPERA SINGER AMANDA RADDATZ.
REALLY?
WELL, YOU'RE IN LUCK, THEN.
EARLIER, JILL LEARNED MORE ABOUT OUR PRIMA DONNA.
OKAY, SO WHEN YOU'RE SINGING,
WHAT DO YOU-- WHAT DO YOU SING ABOUT?
UM, IT'S ALL ABOUT LOVE AND DEATH AND...
BEAUTY AND... EVERYTHING ELSE.
SO IF YOU HAD TO SING ONE ABOUT "WIPEOUT,"
WHAT WOULD IT BE LIKE?
(harp plays glissando)
♪ OH, JILL, YOU ARE SO LOVELY ♪
♪ MY HUSBAND LOVES YOU, IT'S TRUE ♪
♪ IT MAKES FEEL SO JEALOUS ♪
♪ I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ♪
(sobs)
BING!
♪ KILL THE JILL ♪
♪ KILL THE JILL, KILL THE JILL ♪
♪ ON THE WIPEOUT ZONE ♪
♪ AHH, AHH ♪
(John H.) CLASSIC PLOT, JOHN.
(John A.) NOT AN OPERA.
(singing indistinctly)
♪ AHH ♪
AMANDA NOW APPROACHING THE DOOR KNOCK.
♪ AHH ♪
OH! (laughs) ACT ONE, AND TRAGEDY STRIKES.
I KNOW. LIKE I SAID, TRAGEDY.
ACT TWO, NOW.
THE OPERA SINGER MUST DEFEAT THE SUCKER PUNCH.
AAH!
OOH! WHACKED LIKE A SOPRANO.
(off-key) ♪ SHE'S IN THE MUD ♪
(wolves howling)
(off-key) ♪ YOU'RE OFF-KEY ♪
♪ I LOVE BIG BALLS ♪
(clank)
OH, HO HO!
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THAT IN SUPER SLO-MO.
SHE FELL HARDER
THAN THE CHANDELIER IN "PHANTOM OF THE OPERA."
DON'T GET UPPITY WITH ME, ANDERSON.
LET'S SEE IF AMANDA CAN HANDLE THE SHAKE-A-LATOR.
WHOO! WHOO!
AND SHE CATCHES A NICE ARIA ON THE WAY DOWN.
(hands slap)
SHAKE YOU LATER, AMANDA.
JILL, I KEEP TELLING YA, DON'T GET ALL ALTO.
THAT MAKES NO SENSE.
YEAH. I DON'T KNOW WHAT ANY OF THESE WORDS MEAN.
HERE COMES OUR OPERA SINGER, HEADING FOR THE SHAPE-SHIFTER.
♪ THIS IS SO MUCH FUN ♪
WHOO! OH! (growls)
♪ WHOO ♪
IT'S WATER.
I MADE IT!
I LOVE HIGH SOCIETY, JOHN.
♪ AHH ♪
AND NOTHING SAYS "HIGH SOCIETY" LIKE A HILLBILLY JOG.
♪ I'M DONE, I'M DONE, I AM DONE ♪
(whispers) THANK YOU.
WELL, FROM HIGH SOCIETY TO EVEN HIGHER BUILDING,
HERE COMES CONSTRUCTION WORKER RENE THORN
UP TO THE SUCKER PUNCH.
JILL GOT THE, UH, NO-BID CONTRACT FOR THIS INTERVIEW.
(John H.) YEAH! DOIN' THE BUS!
(John A.) GREAT. WE'RE DANCING.
YEAH. ALL RIGHT.
I HAVE THIS THING ABOUT CONSTRUCTION WORKERS.
YOU KNOW, IT'S, LIKE, WHEN YOU WALK BY THEY, LIKE,
WHISTLE AT THE LADIES AND THEY SAY RUDE COMMENTS.
ABSOLUTELY.
WHOO! CHECK IT OUT!
SHAKE IT, BABY! LOOKIN' GOOD!
ALL RIGHT.
(John A.) ALL RIGHT, WELL, RENE'S LOOKIN' GOOD.
SHE SQUARES OFF WITH THE SUCKER PUNCH.
UHH! AAH!
OOH! CAN YOU SAY "WORKMAN'S COMP"?
(counter flips, dings)
ZERO DAYS SINCE OUR LAST ACCIDENT.
LET'S TAKE IT BACK TO THE START OF THE COURSE
AAH!
FUNNY YOU SHOULD MENTION THAT. JILL?
"BALL BUSTER." HI, MONICA. HOW ARE YA?
ALL RIGHT, WHAT'S YOUR STRATEGY?
MY STRATEGY IS TO GET AS FAST THROUGH THIS COURSE AS I CAN,
SKIPPITY HOP OVER THOSE BALLS.
GOOD LUCK. BACK TO YOU, JOHN.
WHOO!
(John A.) LET'S SEE IF MONICA THE BALL BUSTER
AAH! UHH!
OHH! THEY FOLD HER UP LIKE A ROAD MAP.
THE BIG BALLS DO SOME BUSTING OF THEIR OWN,
OH, THE IRONY.
MONICA AND MOST EVERYBODY ELSE GETTING BUSTED UP
BY THE BIG BALLS.
(clank)
AAH!
(clank)
OOH!
KEEP IT UP. WE'RE GETTING PAID BY THE BUSTING.
AAH! OH!
THAT'S STAY-AT-HOME FATHER TUCKER CARNEY.
OKAY, SO... WHY HAVE YOU GOT AN APRON ON?
WHEN I BECAME A STAY-AT-HOME DAD,
I DECIDED TO EMBRACE, UH, SORT OF THE MOTHERHOOD SIDE OF IT.
I LEARNED TO BAKE. I LEARNED TO COOK AND DO THOSE THINGS.
OH, SO YOUR KIDS MUST BE EXCITED
THEY DON'T KNOW THAT I'M ON "WIPEOUT." SURPRISE!
(audience cheering)
(John A.) LET'S SEE IF "MOMMIE DEAREST"
(John H.) WELL, HE'S SMART ENOUGH
OH!
HE SHOULDN'T BE TOO *** HIMSELF, JOHN.
AAH! UHH!
OH, NO, NO, NO, NO.
I WAS HOPING ONE PERSON--
AAH! (grunts)
UHH! AAH!
(whirring, smacking)
UHH! OH, MY GOD! I'M GONNA PUKE.
AND THAT'S WHY THEY CALL IT THE SHAKE-A-LATOR.
COULDN'T AGREE MORE.
LET'S GO BACK TO THE SUCKER PUNCH WALL,
WHERE WE HAVE 26 YEAR OLD SAM BELL FROM L.A., CALIFORNIA.
UHH!
OH! GETS PAINT RIGHT IN THE EYE.
OHH!
OH! AND A CLUB IN THE HEAD.
PAINT IN THE OTHER EYE, AND HIS PANTS ARE FALLING DOWN.
BACK WHEN THIS GUY WAS A BIT MORE PUT-TOGETHER,
SAMUEL, WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?
OH, YES!
(speaks indistinctly)
HEY, JOHN,
JILL.
LET'S GO TO OUR FINAL CONTESTANT OF THE DAY.
JASON RICHARD IS ABOUT TO TAKE ON THE BIG BALLS.
(boing)
WHAT THE WHAT NOW?
I BELIEVE JILL'S GETTING FILLED IN ON THE RICH FACTOR.
OH, YEAH.
WELL, YOU KNOW HOW THEY GOT THE "X" FACTOR,
AND THE "X" FACTOR USUALLY IS THE ONE THAT GETS IT DONE.
SO, YOU KNOW, MY LAST NAME'S RICHARD SO I JUST THREW IN THAT.
BOTTOM LINE IS,
I'M-A RUN THROUGH THIS LIKE A CHEETAH, YOU KNOW.
(John A.) A GOOD TIME EARLY.
LET'S SEE IF THE RICH FACTOR'S CATLIKE QUICKNESS
HELPS HIM OUT ON THE SHAKE-A-LATOR.
OHH!
(whirring)
(John H.) YEAH,
HE LOOKS LIKES A CHEETAH WITH COMPROMISED EQUILIBRIUM,
WELL, HE HAS MADE IT TO THE END.
THERE YA GO. GREAT IDEA. JUMP FROM A SEATED POSITION.
AH!
THE RICH FA--
OH, THE FACTOR MAY BE RICH BUT THE RESULT WAS POOR.
NEVERTHELESS, HE'S CLOCKING A VERY NICE TIME
OH!
WELL, HE MADE IT THROUGH, BUT IF YOU'RE KEEPING SCORE AT HOME,
THAT'S THE LAWS OF PHYSICS 2, RICH FACTOR 0.
STILL, DO NOT MOCK THE MAN'S CHEETAH SKILLS.
THE RICH FACTOR HAS COME IN WITH THE FASTEST TIME OF THE DAY.
SO HE'LL BE MOVING ON,
ALONG WITH PAPA DOG WAYNE COLLINS,
SAMOAN WARRIOR ISAIA OFOIA AND SUGAR MAMA DEBBIE MARKHAM.
ALSO IN OUR TOP 12, MOMMIE DEAREST TUCKER CARNEY,
(Amanda) ♪ AHH ♪
(drill whirs)
YEP, WHEN WE RETURN,
A BOATLOAD MORE WIPEOUTS COMING YOUR WAY.
♪♪♪
WE HAVE RETURNED ON "WIPEOUT"...
(chuckles)
AFTER OUR QUALIFYING ROUND,
WE'VE NARROWED THE STARTING FIELD IN HALF.
12 CONTESTANTS HAVE MOVED ON.
AMONG THEM, WE HAVE JASON "THE RICH FACTOR" RICHARD,
OUR SAMOAN WARRIOR ISAIA OFOIA
AND CONSTRUCTION WORKER RENE THORN.
ALSO ON THE LEADERBOARD, TUCKER "MOMMIE DEAREST" CARNEY,
BALL BUSTER MONICA MORA,
(Amanda) ♪ AHH ♪
AND OUR DENTIST DR. BUENO.
12 CONTESTANTS THROUGH, AND SOON TO BE WHITTLED DOWN TO 6
BY FOUR BIG RED ARMS OF JUSTICE.
YOU KNOW IT, YOU LOVE IT-- IT'S THE DOUBLE CROSS.
OUR REMAINING COMPETITORS WILL BEGIN
ON A 10-FOOT HIGH STARTING PLATFORM
AS FOUR PLANKS SPIN AROUND AND AROUND.
CONTESTANTS MUST JUMP ON ONE OF THE THREE GREEN PLANKS,
THEN EXIT ONTO THE FINISH PLATFORM
BUT LOOK OUT,
BECAUSE IN THEIR WAY ARE FOUR SWEEPER ARMS
(smack)
YES. CONTESTANTS HAVE TO AVOID THOSE BARS
AS THEY TRY TO GET ACROSS, AND IF THEY WIPEOUT,
RULES OF THE GAME REQUIRE
THEY START THE WHOLE THING OVER AGAIN.
IT IS ONE GLORIOUS HEAT,
AND THE FIRST SIX MAKING IT TO THE OTHER SIDE
I'M FIRED UP. I KNOW THE DOUBLE CROSS IS FIRED UP.
(cheering)
THE SIREN OF THE OPERA SINGER, AMANDA RADDATZ,
IS TRYING TO SUMMON LOCAL WOODLAND CREATURES
THE RICH FACTOR IS IN THE BUILDING.
WELL, IN THE AREA.
OKAY, WELL, WHEN YOU FIGURE IT OUT, YOU LET US KNOW.
YOU KNOW, DEBBIE,
(air horn blows)
WELL, THE DOUBLE CROSS IS UNDERWAY, AND WE AWAIT
THE DARING CONTESTANT WHO WILL MAKE THE FIRST MOVE,
AAH!
OHH!
AAH!
AH, THAT'S GOOD ADVICE FOR SUGAR MAMA.
SHE TAKES HER TRY. BALL BUSTER MONICA GOES IN.
OOH, LOOK AT THAT! TWO AT A TIME, JOHN.
SUGAR MAMA DEBBIE SUGAR CRASHES...
AS PAPA DOG TAKES A FLEA DIP.
AAH!
LET'S GO TO THE VIDEOTAPE HERE.
THIS IS EASILY THE BEST WIPEOUT WE HAVE SEEN FROM MONICA
OOH!
WELL, THIS ONE.
I LOVE THE DOUBLE CROSS, JOHN.
UHH!
COME ON, TUCKER. IT'S CALLED "WIPEOUT," NOT "HANG OUT."
OOH!
JOHNNY, IT'S STARTING TO LOOK LIKE THESE CONTESTANTS
ARE NEVER GONNA SOLVE THIS OBSTACLE.
AAH!
I MEAN, YOU GET ON THE ONE PLANK THAT'S GREEN,
YEAH, JASON "THE RICH FACTOR" RICHARD
AAH!
MM! LET'S GIVE THAT A SECOND LOOK.
THE RICH FACTOR'S BID TO ADVANCE GOES BELLY UP,
OHH!
HOLD IT.
OOH!
JOHN, YES! IT'S THE CLASSIC SHOE LOSS!
IT'S LIKE A RITE OF PASSAGE HERE ON "WIPEOUT."
WE ARE STILL 0-FOR ON THE DOUBLE CROSS.
MEANWHILE, JUST ITCHING TO GET GOING
IS ISAIA, OUR SAMOAN WARRIOR. WHAT'S HE DOING NOW, JOHN?
IT'S THE SAMOAN WHIRLING DERVISH.
WHAT'S YOUR POINT?
WHAT ISAIA'S ACTUALLY DOING HERE IS STALLING
UNTIL THAT RED PLANK CAN COME AROUND AND LEAD HIM
WOW.
ISAIA THE FIRST CONTESTANT MOVING ON TO THE NEXT ROUND.
OUR SUGAR MAMA'S MADE IT TO THE CENTER.
OUR MOMMIE DEAREST
(Tucker) WAIT FOR THE PERFECT TIME. NOW!
UHH!
OHH! CAP'N CRUNCH THAT WAS AWESOME!
OUR SUGAR MAMA POWDERED AND JUST LANDS ON HER FACE.
THERE GOES HER SWEET TOOTH.
(Tucker) ISAIA, HOW YOU DOIN', MAN?
(John H.) HE CAN'T RISK GETTING WET. HE JUST DID HIS HAIR.
(grunts)
THE RICH FACTOR MIGHT PAY OFF HERE.
WHOA!
WE'LL SEE IT AGAIN, JOHN.
HAPPILY. THE RICH FACTOR NOT FACTORING IN
THE FIRST LAW OF PHYSICS-- A SOLID PLATFORM AND YOUR FACE
WHOA!
WE STILL NEED FIVE MORE CONTESTANTS.
SUGAR MAMA GOES FOR IT, REACHES THE CENTER.
COME ON, TURKEYS!
OH!
WHOO!
BREAK OUT THE POP ROCKS. IT'S CELEBRATION TIME.
WHOA! ♪ AAH, AAH ♪
AND BEGINS A DUET WITH THAT SWEEPER ARM. OH!
SO WE HAVE FOUR SPOTS OPEN.
OUR DENTIST DR. BUENO BACK AT IT, HOPS THE BAR,
LITTLE HESITATION IN THE MIDDLE.
(drill whirs)
WHOO!
(laughs) NITROUS FOR EVERYONE!
HALF OUR SPOTS ARE FILLED. THREE OF THEM REMAIN.
JOHNNY, I THINK THESE CONTESTANTS
ARE FINALLY STARTING TO FIGURE THIS THING OUT.
OUR FEMALE CONSTRUCTION WORKER MAKES IT AS WELL.
PAPA DOG IS UP, HURDLES THAT BAR,
(cheering)
AAH!
ALL RIGHT, WATCH TWICE, NOT ONCE.
OUR FEMALE CONSTRUCTION WORKER GETS HAMMERED.
STILL LOOKING FOR TWO MORE, JOHNNY,
WHO'S THAT NOW?
WHAT DOES SHE DO?
WELL, WHY IS SHE HANGING OUT IN THE MIDDLE?
AAH!
JASON USES THE RICH FACTOR, QUICKLY OVER THE MIDDLE,
YEAH!
WELL, THAT LEAVES US WITH ONE SPOT LEFT
I THINK YOU FORGOT ABOUT MOMMIE DEAREST, JOHN.
OH!
AAH!
AND OVER THE SIDE OF THE RED PLANK.
(grunts) OOH! AAH!
OH! THE CONSTRUCTION WORKER IS DOWN!
YEAH, IT LOOKS LIKE THE VILLAGE PEOPLE DOWN FIVE.
WE'RE LOOKING FOR ONLY ONE MORE PERSON TO ADVANCE.
(laughs)
MOMMIE DEAREST FINALLY REMOVES HIS APRON
YEAH, BUT HE'S STILL GOTTA MAKE IT ACROSS,
(grunts)
(contestants cheering)
THAT IS STRATEGY, MY FRIEND. THAT IS STRATEGY.
(Jill) WAY TO GO, TUCKER. YOU DESERVED THAT ONE.
HEY, IF MAMA'S HAPPY, EVERYBODY'S HAPPY.
HE'LL BE MOVING ON ALONG WITH SAMOAN WARRIOR ISAIA OFOIA,
SUGAR MAMA DEBBIE MARKHAM,
OUR DENTIST, DR. BUENO, PAPA DOG WAYNE COLLINS
AND JASON "THE RICH FACTOR" RICHARD.
BUT BEFORE THEY HAVE A SHOT
AT THE WIPEOUT ZONE AND $50,000,
ONE MORE OBSTACLE STANDS IN THEIR WAY.
WHOA!
WELCOME BACK TO "WIPEOUT"...
WHERE OUR CONTESTANTS HAVE BEEN CLEARED FOR TAKEDOWN.
I FEEL THE NEED-- THE NEED FOR AN EXPLANATION.
ALL RIGHT. WELL, THE DOUBLE CROSS
CROSSED 6 MORE CONTESTANTS OFF OUR 50 GRAND LIST.
SO SIX CONTESTANTS REMAIN IN THE RUNNING.
WE'VE GOT MOMMIE DEAREST TUCKER CARNEY,
SAMOAN WARRIOR ISAIA OFOIA,
SUGAR MAMA DEBBIE MARKHAM,
(drill whirs)
PAPA DOG WAYNE COLLINS
AND JASON "THE RICH FACTOR" RICHARD STILL IN.
AND OF THOSE FINAL SIX, FOUR WILL MOVE ON TO THE WIPEOUT ZONE
AND GET A SHOT AT OUR $50,000 FIRST PRIZE.
AH, BUT FIRST THEY MUST TACKLE OUR NEXT OBSTACLE--
UNCLAIMED BAGGAGE.
ROGER THAT.
YOU STAY HERE AND EXPLAIN IT...
I'LL GO THIS WAY AND SEE YOU LATER.
OKAY. ON THIS OBSTACLE, OUR CONTESTANTS WILL HAVE
TO STAY ON THE SPINNER FOR AS LONG AS POSSIBLE.
BUT TO DO SO, THEY MUST JUMP OVER THIS BAR
AAH!
THERE'S ALSO $1,000 UP FOR GRABS FOR THE FIRST PERSON
GETTING THIS BRASS RING. THERE WILL BE FOUR ROUNDS IN ALL,
(cash register dings)
OKAY, THIS IS GOOD.
JUST WAIT, SUGAR MAMA. IT ONLY GETS BETTER
WHEN THE BAR STARTS SWINGING AROUND.
(filtered voice) But first, I've got a job to do.
Ladies and gentlemen, there's going to be some turbulence.
I suggest you fasten your seat belts.
(buzzer sounds)
AND THEY'RE ALL STATIONED RIGHT ABOVE OUR CONTESTANTS.
OH!
(laughs)
UH-OH. HE'S GOT A CAMOUFLAGE BAG.
I DON'T THINK ANYBODY'S GONNA SEE THIS ONE COMING.
(Debbie) OH, SUGAR! AAH! AAH!
OH! OUT GOES SUGAR MAMA
AND THE SAMOAN WARRIOR. IT'S A 2-BAG.
And now we have boxes marked "fragile."
(Jill) OH!
MOMMIE DEAREST IS IN TROUBLE.
OH! HE'S SLIPPED UNDER THAT BAR, AND HE'S GONNA BE OUT.
SO ONLY THREE REMAIN.
(grunts)
AAH!
(grunts) AAH!
GOOD DOG. TWO CONTESTANTS LEFT.
WILL DR. BUENO OR THE RICH FACTOR
(Jeff grunts)
(crash)
He can't handle the tooth.
DR. BUENO DEFINITELY DRAGGING SOME EXCESS BAGGAGE...
Literally.
OH!
TAGGED AGAIN!
BUT THE DOC HAS FINALLY FREED UP THAT BAG ON HIS LEG,
AND NOW HE'S GOT NO WORRIES. OH! WORRIES.
HENSON BAGGING THE BUENO AGAIN.
THIS COULD BE TROUBLE. HE NEEDS TO GET UP TO STAY IN THIS ROUND.
OH! NOW THEY'VE BOTH GONE UNDER THE BAR. WHO WENT FIRST?
(Jill) OH!
Outstanding.
THAT WAS OUTSTANDING, JOHN. LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
AS YOU CAN CLEARLY SEE,
AAH!
HE'S OUT, AND THAT MEANS DR. BUENO WILL BE THE FIRST
(airplane engine roars)
ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE WHO GETS THROUGH THE GATE NEXT.
Ladies and gentlemen, please put your tay--trays--Darn it!
OKAY, OUR TAY AND TRAY ARE IN THEIR UPRIGHT POSITIONS...
AND ROUND TWO IS UNDERWAY.
WHO WILL CLAIM THE NEXT SPOT IN THE WIPEOUT ZONE?
LOOKS LIKE MOMMIE DEAREST WILL BE THE FIRST TO GO OVER
THE BAR--OH! AND THE FIRST TO GET CLOCKED IN THE HEAD.
Yeah! Let's see Mommie try to kiss that
A LITTLE DAZED THERE, BUT HE'S STILL UP FRONT,
WHICH SEEMS TO BE AN AWFUL PLACE.
HE'S A TARGET. NOW IT'S PAPA DOG WHO'S IN TROUBLE.
AAH!
Ew. Wet dog smell.
AAH!
AH! SUGAR. OH.
OH! BUT IT'S THE SAMOAN WARRIOR WHO TAKES A BIG BLOW,
AND HE GOES TO-- WHEREVER BAGS GO
WHEN THEY GET LOST AT THE AIRPORT. HE'S OUT.
AAH!
THE WAY MOMMIE DEAREST HAS BEEN TAKING PUNISHMENT,
I'M GUESSING HE IS NOT GONNA LAST MUCH LONGER.
OH! THAT-- THAT COULD CHANGE THINGS.
OH! THAT ONE WAS AWESOME.
SUGAR MAMA PUSHED MOMMIE DEAREST OUT OF THE WAY
(slo-mo voice) OW!
That was sugar and spice and everything nice.
NOW IT'S JUST A BATTLE OF WHO WANTS IT MORE.
MOMMIE DEAREST NORMALLY DOES THE LAUNDRY,
UH, THIS TIME DONE IN BY LAUNDRY.
DOESN'T EVEN ATTEMPT TO CLEAR THAT BAR. HE'S OUT.
SUGAR MAMA AND RICH FACTOR--
AAH!
OH. AAH!
THE WIPEOUT ZONE IS STILL SUGAR-FREE, AND IT'LL BE
(airplane engine roars)
(buzzer sounds)
MOMMIE DEAREST RIGHT OUT FRONT.
YOU THINK HE'D HAVE LEARNED HIS LESSON BY NOW.
Oh, that'll teach him.
GET THAT $1,000, BABY.
(ding)
OH!
NOW MOMMIE DEAREST IS DOWN.
WILL HIS GREED FINISH HIM OFF?
Yes, it does, John. He is out.
OH, TUCKER'S OUT.
OH, I THINK A SNOWBOARD JUST HIT SUGAR MAMA.
WIPEOUT.
THIS COULD BE TROUBLE FOR PAPA DOG.
BACK TO THE POUND, AND HE IS OUT.
OH! SUGAR MAMA'S KNOCKED SIDEWAYS.
A DIRECT HIT FOR THE SAMOAN WARRIOR.
(airplane engine roars)
(Jill) OH, WE GOT A LADY IN THE FINALS!
THAT'S RIGHT. SUGAR MAMA DOES IT.
OUR FINAL ROUND. WHO'S GONNA MAKE IT THROUGH?
THREE WILL TRY, JILL-- THE SAMOAN WARRIOR,
OUR PAPA DOG,
THEN THERE'S MOMMIE DEAREST, WHO I WOULD NOT WAGER ON.
YOU'D THINK THIS GUY'S GOT A BULL'S-EYE ON HIS HEAD,
(man, deep voice) HUH?
FINAL ROUND UNDERWAY.
OH, A NEAR MISS! THAT ONE LANDED.
Bombs away!
THE SAMOAN WARRIOR TRIPPED UP,
STRUGGLING TO GET THAT FINE WARRIOR PHYSIQUE OVER THE BAR.
NOT HAPPENING. THAT LEAVES PAPA DOG AND MOMMIE DEAREST
FIGHTING FOR ONE SPOT IN THE WIPEOUT ZONE.
MOMMIE DEAREST CONTINUES TO TAKE HEAD SHOTS.
PAPA DOG TAKING CHARGE.
THE LAST SPOT IN THE WIPEOUT ZONE ON THE LINE.
UH-OH.
AAH!
(grunts)
THE BOMBARDMENT OF MOMMIE DEAREST CONTINUES.
HOW MUCH MORE CAN THIS GUY TAKE?
OH!
MOMMIE DEAREST DOES A 360. THE DOG UP AGAIN.
HE'S STUCK ON THAT BAR.
OH, THAT IS A BAD TIME TO ROLL OVER.
WHOO!
JOHNNY, YOU HAVE
AN EFFICIENT GROUP OF BAGGAGE HANDLERS UP THERE.
(sighs) All in a day's work.
SO WE ARE HEADED TO THE WIPEOUT ZONE
WITH OUR DENTIST, DR. BUENO,
JASON "THE RICH FACTOR" RICHARD,
SUGAR MAMA DEBBIE MARKHAM
AND MOMMIE DEAREST TUCKER CARNEY.
STICK AROUND, BECAUSE THESE FOUR
AAH!
AND ONE OF 'EM WILL WALK AWAY WITH $50,000.
OH!
♪♪♪
WE ARE BACK ON "WIPEOUT."
THE MOON IS UP, THE STARS ARE OUT,
AND GOOD HEAVENS, JOHNNY, ONE OF OUR FOUR CONTESTANTS
BUT FIRST THEY MUST FACE DOWN
THAT TEST OF STRENGTH AND ENDURANCE
KNOWN ONLY AS THE WIPEOUT ZONE OR AS WE'RE CALLING IT TONIGHT,
THE WIPEOUT ZONE... (voice echoes) IN SPACE!
THE WIPEOUT ZONE IS MADE UP OF THE FOLLOWING STAGES.
IT STARTS WITH THE BATTLESTAR DREADMILL LAUNCH.
CONTESTANTS MUST RUN ALONG A 40-FOOT DREADMILL
AND THROUGH A TORRENT OF WATER CALLED SHEER DESCENT,
DROPPING TO THE TRAMPOLINE AND INTO THE WATER.
AND AFTER A SPLASHDOWN,
CONTESTANTS GO UP AGAINST THE GUT BUSTER...
IN A FARAWAY GALAXY...
(lasers fire)
THEN THEY'RE ON TO THE ROCKET SHIP SINISTAIRS.
CONTESTANTS MUST TIME THEIR CLIMB UP THESE STEPS
(normal voice) OOH!
ONCE ACROSS, IT'S ON TO THE LAST LEG OF THE JOURNEY--
THE GAUNTLET. THE CRANKSHAFT CHALLENGES THEM FIRST,
AND FINALLY, IT'S A LONG WALK TO THE FINISH PLATFORM
(alarms blare)
FOUR CONTESTANTS REMAIN,
AND THE ONE WITH THE BEST TIME GOES HOME $50,000 RICHER.
FIRST UP-- OUR DENTIST, DR. BUENO.
LET'S REVIEW HOW HE MADE IT TO THE WIPEOUT ZONE.
DR. BUENO GOT DRILLED BY THE QUALIFIER...
SPIT OUT AND RINSED OFF BY THE DOUBLE CROSS,
AND WAS THE FIRST TO PICK UP HIS UNCLAIMED BAGGAGE,
GIVING HIM A CHANCE TO CAP OFF THE COMPETITION
WHOO!
DR. JEFF BUENO IS UP, THE LAUNCH SEQUENCE INITIATED,
(beeping)
THE DREADMILL ON, AND JEFF IS OFF, ALTHOUGH NOT TOO QUICKLY.
NO, BUT HE LEAPS THROUGH
THE WALL OF WATER WE CALL SHEER DESCENT
DR. BUENO PLUMMETING DOWN 40 FEET.
YOU WERE RIGHT, JOHNNY. A SLOW RUN AND A LACKLUSTER JUMP,
AAH!
ACTUALLY, THAT'S DR. BUENO, AND HE'S ON HIS WAY
TO THE GUT BUSTER--SIX SLIPPERY HYDRAULIC-POWERED BLOCKS
(whirring)
AND YOU CAN SEE THE PUNISHMENT THEY DISH OUT RIGHT THERE.
IF THAT WEREN'T HARD ENOUGH, DR. BUENO ALSO HAS TO CONTEND...
WITH A GALAXY OF PLANETS AND A METEOR SHOWER.
YEAH, JOHN. THOSE ARE THE KIND OF DANGERS
OH!
MM, HE WAS NOT FAZED BY THE GUT BUSTERS,
AND NOW HE FACES DOWN THE ROCKET SHIP SINISTAIRS.
THIS ONE, JOHNNY, REQUIRES PRECISE TIMING. OH!
OH!
GETTING BLASTED BY THAT SWEEPER ARM.
YEAH, OUR DENTIST GETS HAMMERED IN THE MIDSECTION...
AND FLIPPED HEAD OVER HEELS INTO THE WATER.
UP FOR A SECOND GO NOW. DR. BUENO TAKING
AN EXTRA SECOND, TRYING TO TIME THIS THING OUT.
GETS HIS FOOTING ON THAT FIRST STEP.
YEAH, HE LOSES TRACK OF THAT POLE, JOHN...
AND IT SWEEPS HIS LEGS OUT FROM UNDER HIM,
THE THING YOU HAVE TO REMEMBER ABOUT THE WIPEOUT ZONE, JOHNNY--
IT'S DARK, IT'S COLD, PEOPLE HAVE BEEN TAKING HITS ALL DAY.
AND YET, JEFF SEEMS TO HAVE SETTLED DOWN
ON HIS THIRD TRIP UP THE SINISTAIRS,
HE NOW HAS TO MAKE THAT FRIGHTENING LEAP...
TO THE PLATFORM.
AND NOW HE'S ON TO THE GAUNTLET.
FIRST UP--THE CRANKSHAFT,
AND THERE'S A PATTERN TO THIS OBSTACLE.
HE HAS THAT TIMING DOWN,
AND HE'S ABLE TO EXECUTE IT CORRECTLY.
GUY'S A PRO. NOW JEFF STARING DOWN OUR BLADES OF FURY,
WASTING NO TIME GETTING ACROSS.
AND NOW ON TO THE LAST LEG OF THE GAUNTLET...
(grunts)
NOT TO MENTION THE METEORS,
OH! LOOK AT THIS, JOHNNY--
OH!
OH! BACKWARDS AND TUMBLING INTO THE WATER.
(grunts)
HERE YOU SEE THE ***, AND THERE'S THE TOTTER.
NOW IT'S A COLD, TIRING SWIM
BACK TO THE VERY BEGINNING OF THE GAUNTLET.
HE SPENT 3 MINUTES HERE. TOTAL TIME IS 7 MINUTES.
WE'VE SEEN THIS HAPPEN BEFORE. WHEN YOU GO FIRST,
ALL THAT PRESSURE TO SET A TIME TO BEAT CAN REALLY GET TO YOU.
NOW HE HAS TO AGAIN GO UP AGAINST THE *** TOTTER,
WHICH CAUSED HIM SERIOUS TROUBLE LAST TIME.
ON IT NOW, BUT ALWAYS ON THE VERGE
OF BEING SHAKEN OFF.
HE HAS CRAWLED HIS WAY TO THE END.
DR. BUENO STANDS UP,
AND WITH A TIME OF 7:27, HE HAS SET THE MARK TO BEAT.
LET'S SEE IF IT HOLDS UP AGAINST OUR NEXT CONTESTANT--
OUR MOMMIE DEAREST
AAH!
THEN HE WAITED UNTIL THE LAST MOMENT TO QUALIFY
ON OUR DOUBLE CROSS, ENDURED ALL FOUR ROUNDS
TO BE THE LAST MAN THROUGH ON UNCLAIMED BAGGAGE,
MAKING THE GATE JUST IN TIME TO SECURE THE FINAL SPOT
AND HERE'S MOMMIE DEAREST.
IT IS TIME TO GO.
THE LAUNCH SEQUENCE HAS BEEN INITIATED,
(beeping)
AND HE IS OFF! MOMMIE DEAREST THOUGH WITH A LIGHT JOG...
SORT OF CANTERING DOWN THE DREADMILL DROP.
YEAH, THAT'S A MISSED OPPORTUNITY, JOHN.
YOU GOTTA GET SOME SPEED GOING ON THAT DREADMILL
TO GET DISTANCE ON YOUR LAUNCH,
PUTTING YOU THAT MUCH CLOSER TO THE NEXT OBSTACLE.
A SLOW START FOR TUCKER, WHO LOOKS A BIT TENTATIVE
APPROACHING OUR GUT BUSTER.
AND IF THE GUT BUSTER WASN'T HARD ENOUGH,
HE ALSO HAS TO WATCH OUT FOR THOSE RANDOM METEOR SHOWERS.
OH! MOMMIE DEAREST GETTING TAGGED IN THE FOREHEAD.
OH!
OH! NOW TUCKER REALLY GETTING AN UNWANTED AB WORKOUT,
OH!
ALMOST THE HIGHEST POINT. TUCKER BACK IN THE WATER.
YEAH, HE FOUND OUT
HOW THAT OBSTACLE GOT ITS NAME THE HARD WAY.
FELL OUT OF ORBIT AND STRAIGHT INTO THE DRINK.
SECOND GO NOW. MOMMIE DEAREST WELL BEHIND
THE PACE SET BY OUR CURRENT LEADER DR. BUENO.
IN FACT, TUCKER HAS USED UP HALF THE TIME ON THE CLOCK,
(grunts)
YOU CAN SEE JILL ON THE SIDELINES WITH DR. BUENO,
BUT TUCKER HAS FINALLY MADE IT TO THAT LAST STEP.
DON'T COUNT HIM OUT YET, THOUGH, JOHNNY.
THIS GUY HAS A DETERMINED SPIRIT,
AND HE RALLIED FROM BEHIND IN OUR LAST TWO ROUNDS.
NOW HE'S ON THE ROCKET SHIP SINISTAIRS...
AND THAT COULD NOT HAVE GONE WORSE.
(grunts)
THANK YOU VERY MUCH. I APPRECIATE THE SPACE REFERENCE.
THIS IS WHERE I BIT IT HARD.
I KNOW. I REMEMBER, WHICH MEANS THIS IS A BIG OPPORTUNITY
SECOND TRY.
OH.
THE SINISTAIRS ARE SHOWING TUCKER NO MERCY TONIGHT.
JUDGING BY THE LOOK ON HIS FACE,
HE SEEMS RESIGNED TO HIS FATE.
(air horn blows)
AND THERE IT IS.
YEAH, NO COMING-FROM-BEHIND VICTORY FOR TUCKER
AS HIS "WIPEOUT" DAY IS DONE. AND SO DR. BUENO STILL HOLDS
THE TIME TO BEAT AT 7 MINUTES, 27 SECONDS.
BUT STICK AROUND BECAUSE AFTER THIS, SUGAR MAMA DEBBIE MARKHAM
AND JASON "THE RICH FACTOR" RICHARD WILL TAKE ON THE ZONE.
♪♪♪
WELCOME BACK TO "WIPEOUT."
WE ARE IN THE SECOND HALF OF THE WIPEOUT ZONE,
AND CURRENTLY, OUR DENTIST, DR. BUENO,
THAT'S RIGHT. THE RICH FACTOR IS STILL TO RUN,
BUT FIRST UP-- SUGAR MAMA DEBBIE MARKHAM.
(trills)
AAH!
AAH!
SHE FLEW THROUGH UNCLAIMED BAGGAGE...
TREATING HERSELF TO A SPOT
WHOO!
(laughs) WHOO!
AS THE ONLY WOMAN LEFT,
(beeping)
AAH!
(grunts)
DEBBIE GOT SOME SWEET AIR AS SHE FLEW INTO THE ZONE...
POSITIONING HERSELF FOR A VERY SHORT SWIM.
THAT'S HOW YOU HANDLE THE DREADMILL LAUNCH,
AND HER TIME REFLECTS THE EXCELLENT START
OH, MY GOD. SLIPPERY!
THAT'S RIGHT. THEY ARE SLIPPERY, BUT THAT'S
NOT EVEN THE HARD PART. REMEMBER, JOHN,
THOSE PLANETS ABOVE YOU,
OH!
SHE IS ALREADY ON TO THE LAST STEP.
OH, MAMA!
NOW UP AGAINST THE ROCKET SHIP SINISTAIRS.
THAT SLIP, JOHNNY,
ACTUALLY HELPED HER AVOID THE FIRST SWEEPER ARM.
OH! TAKES A SHOT TO THE HEAD RIGHT THERE.
OH! BUT THE SECOND ONE GOT HER.
SUGAR MAMA NEARLY TO THE TOP,
ONLY TO FALL ALL THE WAY BACK DOWN.
DEBBIE TAKES A SHOT TO THE DOME
RIGHT BEFORE A HITCHCOCK-STYLE TUMBLE.
THE HIGHER THEY GO UP, THE FARTHER THEY FALL DOWN.
DR. BUENO DROPPED FROM A LOW HEIGHT, REMEMBER,
CLOSE TO THE BASE OF THE SINISTAIRS.
OH!
OH! SUGAR MAMA FALLING LIKE MAPLE SYRUP
DOWN A STACK OF PANCAKES. NO! SHE MANAGES TO HOLD ON!
THAT WAS REMARKABLE. SUGAR MAMA SAVED IT,
TUMBLING DOWN THE STAIRS BUT STAYS OUT OF THE WATER.
THAT TOOK SOME STRENGTH. AND SHE CRAWLS BACK NOW
TO THE TOP OF THE SINISTAIRS,
AND STILL IN GREAT SHAPE FOR THE GAUNTLET.
UNBELIEVABLE. SHE MADE IT!
NOW DEBBIE WILL EASER HER WAY DOWN TO THAT CRANKSHAFT.
THIS REQUIRES PATIENCE AND TIMING, AND, WELL,
AND AT THIS POINT,
SHE'S RIGHT AT THE 4-MINUTE MARK NOW.
OH! AND TOUGH WIPEOUT THERE ON THE BLADES OF FURY.
YEAH, THE BLADES CLAIMING THEIR FIRST VICTIM...
IN THE WIPEOUT ZONE TONIGHT
STILL HAS AROUND A MINUTE AND A HALF LEFT ON THE CLOCK.
ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE IF SUGAR MAMA CAN MAKE THE MOST
AND NOW BACK TO THOSE BLADES OF FURY
(grunts) NO MORE!
OH, BUT THERE'S MORE, DEBBIE. IT'S THE *** TOTTER.
HIGH-RISK TERRITORY HERE, THOUGH--50 GRAND AT ONE END,
ALL AROUND THE THREAT OF HAVING TO RESTART THE GAUNTLET.
OH!
SHE NEARLY SLIPS THERE, BUT MANAGES TO CONTROL
WITH A TIME OF 6 MINUTES, 16 SECONDS...
SUGAR MAMA DEBBIE MARKHAM HAS THE NEW TIME TO BEAT.
WELL, YOUR TIME BEGS TO DIFFER, SUGAR MAMA.
LET'S SEE IF IT STANDS UP AGAINST OUR FINAL CONTESTANT
OF THE NIGHT-- JASON RICHARD.
JASON "THE RICH FACTOR" RICHARD DOMINATED THE QUALIFIER,
POSTING THE FASTEST TIME OF THE DAY.
BUT WHILE THE RICH FACTOR HELPED HIM GET TO THE ZONE,
IT REMAINS TO BE SEEN IF IT'LL HELP HIM TAKE HOME
YEAH!
IT ALL COMES DOWN TO THIS-- THE RICH FACTOR
(beeping)
AND ONE LAST TIME, THERE IS THE COUNTDOWN,
AND THE RICH FACTOR IS GOOD TO GO.
THE RICH FACTOR!
OH, LIKE A CLARION CALL FROM THE HEAVENS,
THE RICH FACTOR IS IN EFFECT, PEOPLE,
GLIDING DOWN LIKE A PELICAN INTO THE SEA.
NOW WE'LL SEE IF OUR FASTEST MAN IN THE QUALIFIER
CAN BE OUR FASTEST MAN WHEN IT PAYS--
OH!
HE LITERALLY DID NOT GET ONE STEP ONTO THE OBSTACLE
SUGAR MAMA MADE IT THROUGH THIS OBSTACLE QUICKLY AND CLEANLY
ON HER VERY FIRST TRY, SO THIS DOES PUT RICH FACTOR
IN A LITTLE BIT OF A HOLE ALREADY.
MORE THAN 16 FEET ABOVE THE WATER...
THE RICH FACTOR TAKE A BIG DROP ONTO THE NEXT PEDESTAL,
BUT HE'S MADE IT ACROSS SAFELY.
TAKE ANOTHER LOOK.
(grunts)
NOW HE'S ON TO THE ROCKET SHIP SINISTAIRS,
AND THE RICH FACTOR TAKES A BRAND-NEW APPROACH--
JUMPING ON THE SECOND STEP-- VERY GUTSY.
OH, BUT HE SLIPS OFF THAT SECOND--HANGING ON...
ACTUALLY SAVED, JOHN, BY THE FIRST STEP.
THAT IS AMAZING.
OHH!
(squeals)
STILL THE ONE TO BEAT IN THIS GAME.
JASON SEEMS TO HAVE LOST HIS BEARINGS.
HE IS SWIMMING THE WRONG WAY, YEAH.
CONFUSED BY THE DARKNESS, PERHAPS.
AND WITH THAT EXTRA LONG SWIM,
HE MAY HAVE JUST TAKEN A $50,000 BATH.
A MINUTE AND A HALF LEFT ON THE CLOCK,
THE BIG HALF OF THE WIPEOUT ZONE TO GO.
USING THE SAME STRATEGY, JOHN--
AND HE REALLY NEEDS TO START MOVING AT THIS POINT,
OH! HE TAKES A SHOT TO THE HEAD.
OW!
HE'S HOLDING ON FOR DEAR LIFE,
REALLY NEEDS TO CALL ON THE RICH FACTOR HERE.
STRUGGLING BUT HOLDING ON,
HE STILL HAS MORE THAN A MINUTE LEFT,
SO IF HE CAN GET TO THE GAUNTLET,
HE STILL HAS A CHANCE FOR 50 GRAND.
AAH!
OH! OVERSHOOTS AND TAKES A HEADER
UNBELIEVABLE. WE'VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THAT, JOHNNY.
NOW SINCE HE HIT THE PLATFORM BEFORE GOING INTO THE WATER,
HE STILL GETS TO MOVE ON TO THE GAUNTLET,
BUT THAT CLIMB BACK UP IS GONNA COST HIM.
OH!
CAUGHT ON THAT CRANKSHAFT,
AAH!
AND THAT WILL END
(air horn blows)
YOU JUST WON $50,000!
YES! YEAH, BABY! SOME JAWBREAKERS! WHOO!
BUST OUT THE INSULIN. IT'S PARTY TIME.
WELL, THAT'S GONNA DO IT FOR US.
PLEASE JOIN US NEXT WEEK, AS ALWAYS,
WHEN WE WILL HAVE 24 NEW CONTESTANTS
TAKING ON SOME CRAZY NEW OBSTACLES.
TILL THEN, AMERICA, I'M JOHN ANDERSON.
AND FOR JILL WAGNER,
I'M JOHN HENSON SAYING GOOD NIGHT AND BIG BALLS.
♪♪♪
AAH!
AAH!
AAH!
AAH!
OH! AAH!
(grunts)
AAH!
(Amanda) ♪ AHH ♪
AAH!
AAH!
OH!
AAH!
HONK THE HORN. HONK THE HORN.
YEAH!