Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
The strange blue glow has been seen on multiple fronts.
Especially by troops in our entrenched positions; here and here.
In fact, everyone we talk to says that this blue glow is emanating
from in the southern half of Berlin.
I donít see why weíre so worried about it.
I mean, itís just a little Swiss soap.
My Fuehrer, the soapÖ
The soap is in control.
Weíre completely surrounded by it.
If you have taken a shower and used soap to wash yourself,
please leave the room.
The soap is in control!
How the *** can the soap be in control?!
Swiss canít even choose what side theyíre on
and you expect me to believe that now their soap is in control?!
I *** hate the Swiss.
Iíll never be able to take another shower until we solve this.
Do you have any idea how bad Iím going to smell?
Weíre all locked into this little room together
And weíre all going to smell worse than the *** Italians!
My Fuehrer we had no idea the soap would attack.
Itís glowing blue soap you ***,
what the *** did you think it would do!
My Fuehrer, it smells just like sea minerals.
My grandmother smelled like sea minerals.
Do you want an army of *** grandmothers?!
Sea minerals!
I bet the only reason that you liked the soap
was because it had a fashionably designed bottle, like a tear drop.
No one even bothered to wonder for one *** second
Why the soap was glowing blue?
Who cares about industrial design of the bottle!
One minute its just sitting there in your new kitchen
And then all of a sudden the soap is in control.
And meanwhile weíre losing a war because
our troops smell like my *** grandmother!
Donít get me wrong, I love my grandmother
She was a strong woman, head of her knitting circle.
But knitting circles arenít going to win us back Berlin!
And weíll be left with the cleanest city in Europe.
Theyíll make movies about the Soap being in control
The Swiss will laugh at how the tricked us.
And once great German empire will be remembered
For smelling like *** sea minerals.
Itís ok, my dear. I thought it looked nice in your kitchen.
I will admit, though, that it looked nice in our kitchen.
It provided a colorful contrast to the black and white tiles.
It was elegant.
Some might even say modernist.
I guess weíll just have to switch to that
green soap that smells like kiwi.
At least grandma didnít smell like kiwi.
*** Swiss.