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J'zargo: Hello, friends! Thank you for coming.
Make yourself at home.
Brelas: Dear me, I'm nervous.
It's as though all of Skyrim is watching us.
She's my assistant, and...
I think she does a decent job.
Ah, thank you very much.
Now then, look at this.
Another Hairless looking for food!
[Vittoria Vici (23) writes:] Another Hairless looking for food!
Another Hairless looking for food! [I'm always watching your show, J'zargo.]
[I'm always watching your show, J'zargo.]
Ah. [I'm always watching your show, J'zargo.]
Ah. [Next week is my wedding, and I'd like to serve something outdoors.]
[Next week is my wedding, and I'd like to serve something outdoors.] My, my, what a wonderful bride Vittoria makes.
My, my, what a wonderful bride Vittoria makes. [What's something I can make a lot of at once?]
[What's something I can make a lot of at once?] Ah, we can't turn this one down.
[What's something I can make a lot of at once?]
Now then, um...
Let's do this one.
Yes, yes.
This one brings back many a memory of Elsweyr's warm sands.
Now, J'zargo will...
What?
Sounds delicious.
But one best stay away until dinnertime, if they want to retain their appetite.
S-sorry!
That came out wrong.
Go on.
Continue, please.
Don't mind me.
There once a-was a woman, as fair as an evening of springtime, in old Stros M'Kai--
[One Hour Before: Backstage] There once a-was a woman, as fair as an evening of springtime, in old Stros M'Kai--
There once a-was a woman, as fair as an evening of springtime, in old Stros M'Kai--
Brelas: Good morning. There once a-was a woman, as fair as an evening of springtime, in old Stros M'Kai--
Brelas: Good morning.
J'zargo: Uuooaaahhgh?! Brelas: Good morning.
J'zargo: Uuooaaahhgh?!
Who are you?
Can't Khajiit have any privacy?
Get out of here at once!
Ah, pardon me.
I'm Brelas.
It's an honor, getting the chance to prepare a meal with the best chef in the entire Empire.
Well, I...
I didn't ask for this!
[laughs] Just leave all the little things to me.
No, see-
You need me, right? No, see-
You need me, right?
But-
J'zargo doesn't understand this.
Huh?
I haven't any idea what you're saying.
[growling]
Enough of this!
You should leave.
How awful!
[sobbing]
Hey!
[sobbing continues]
I'm begging you-
J'zargo: I was only joking!
I'm sorry.
I'll do whatever you ask.
Brelas: Oh, thank goodness.
Then it's decided.
When you're finished preparing, we'll meet over there.
Goodbye.
What was that all about?!
Your Holy Night's a guaranteed success, with--
Neco's Kitchen, Christmas Special!
Hey!
Pay attention!
Ah. Right.
Now then--I'll cut you in two!
Fresh vegetables and fruit!
This is a piece of cake.
Sweetroll--
A taste of home.
The base broth is already boiled.
Which ingredient should we add first?
All of them.
In the end,
if you mix everything together, it'll probably turn out fine.
Is that right.
How laughable.
What did you say?
Nothing at all.
What's next?
What else!
The finest skooma,
Deathbell,
a silver ingot,
a flawless ruby,
one at a time.
I warned you about this.
Then, we shall wait here.
What do we do next?
Um...
Let me-
Just place it there, and hurry. Let me-
Just place it there, and hurry.
Ah, horker!
Isn't it delicious?
[unintelligible]
Now!
Burn it to a crisp.
Like always.
Tomato-
Chaurus egg-
Ah...but with all that fur,
won't some get into the food?
Never thought of it that way.
...Unbelievable.
Augh!
It's burnt black.
What were you thinking?!
It's fine, forget it.
Okay?
Hey! Don't touch that!
My apologies.
It is your most famous recipe, after all.
That it is.
And as a special seasoning-
Moon sugar, of course! And as a special seasoning-
Moon sugar, of course!
For flavoring.
What beautiful colors!
Something smells foul.
What do you think it is?
It's like a...
...a corpse?
Oh, yes.
Heaps of dead bodies.
Stop that! Heaps of dead bodies.
Stop that!
How did you manage that?
Oh! By the Nine!
Hurry!
Do something!
This is unbelievable!
Come on, what are you going to do? What are you going to do?!
[coughing] Someone- [more coughing]
That's dangerous!
I'll bet you didn't expect this. [laughs]
Huh?
What in blazes-
See? It was nothing.
But... J'zargo is pleased to see you are not in pieces.
Yes...
Now, how did it turn out?
Very nice.
That's absurd!
[Zargo-style Khajiit Potage & Vegetable "Moon Saute"]
Try eating it, and even in this cold land one is reminded of one's birthplace. [Zargo-style Khajiit Potage & Vegetable "Moon Saute"]
Try eating it, and even in this cold land one is reminded of one's birthplace.
Congratulations on your marriage.
I wish you all the best in your new life together.
How is it?
It tastes terrible, is all I can say.
Then, until we meet again.
See you next time.
See you. See you next time.
See you.
Are you ill?