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BERT: Oh, wow!
These boring stories are really exciting.
ERNIE: I just got this disguise kit, and it says fool
your friends.
It says, with these disguises, even your best friend won't
recognize you.
So what I'm going to do is, I'm going to go outside and
put one of them on, and come back in and fool
my old buddy, Bert.
[SNICKERING]
Hey, Bert, I'm going outside now.
Bye.
Hey, listen, Bert, I'm not going to be back for a long
time, so if someone comes, go to the door, please.
OK?
BERT: Mm-hm.
Whatever, Ernie.
Oh, I don't believe this.
The prince just drank a glass of water.
[KNOCK AT THE DOOR]
ERNIE: Yo, ho, ho!
Avast and shiver me timbers.
Have you seen my mizzenmast, sir?
It's missing.
BERT: Ernie, you're a fool.
ERNIE: He recognized me.
Probably just a lucky guess.
I'll try again and really fool him.
I have more than one disguise.
Hey, Bert, I'm very sorry I disturbed you.
I'm going out again, and I won't be back for
a long, long time.
[SNICKERING]
[KNOCK AT THE DOOR]
BERT: Come in.
ERNIE: Excuse me, sir.
I seem to be lost.
Can you direct me to Granny's house?
BERT: I don't believe this.
Ernie, Little Red Riding Hood did not have a beard.
Now, will you just leave me alone
with those silly disguises?
ERNIE: OK.
I'm sorry, Bert.
I won't bother you anymore.
I'll just go out and check the mail.
BERT: Uh huh, uh huh.
Sure, Ernie.
Sure, sure, sure.
Oh, boy.
[KNOCK AT THE DOOR]
BERT: [SIGHING]
OK, that does it.
That does it.
I've just about had it, Ernie.
Really, I'm just sitting, trying to read here, and all
you do is disturb me with these--
WOLF: Ya da da, ya da da.
BERT: That is the silliest disguise I've ever seen.
Ernie!
Ernie, will you stop that with the chair?
Stop it!
Ernie!
Ernie, will you leave the chair alone?
ERNIE: Hey, Bert.
BERT: What?
ERNIE: Are you talking to me?
BERT: Yes I am.
Will you please leave the--
WOLF: Roar!
BERT: Aah!
ERNIE: Who's that, Bert?
BERT: Ernie!
Ernie, what's going on?
Help me.
Ernie, here I come.
Watch out!
Here I come, Ernie.