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Narrator: Kevin was about to leave when he found the medicine cabinet,
with a bunch of little bottles with rubber tops.
Kevin knew that the rubber tops were used to fill needles
because he recognized them from the daily doses he used to get when he was in the mental institution.
Kevin didn't know what novacaine was,
but he figured that if you take enough of anything it's bound to do something to ya.
Kevin figured he'd better get out of there before the cops came,
but because he'd frozen all his limbs and his head, he couldn't move a muscle.
This really upset Kevin, because he couldn't lift his arms to light his smoke.
Dentist: Oh my lord !
Hygienist: Do you think he's dead ?
Narrator: Doctor Melthorpe called the police.
It took the two cops about 10 minutes to wake Kevin up.
Because Kevin was so young,
and really groggy and disoriented,
neither of the cops expected him to come up swinging.
Kevin landed a couple of real sweet left hooks
before one of the cops got him across the back of the head and put him in handcuffs.
When the police phoned Kevin's parents from juvenile hall to tell them what had happened,
Kevin's dad laughed so hard that he woke up the ***.
Oh.... what's so funny ?
My dumb boy. No matter how many times you tell him the rules of life,
it just don't sink in on account of his f'in head's broken.
If you're stealing drugs or ***, don't take it while you're still in the building you broke in to.
Go find a park or somethin'