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You want my honest opinion? Well, you wouldn't be here if you didn't, would you? This movie...this
god-awful low-budget studio-killing *** of a movie...is equally as bad as RoboCop 2.
I know, right? Because of the reputation this film had, I thought I would have to prepare
for one of the worst films I would ever see, the Batman and Robin of the RoboCop franchise.
Who'd have thought that the fan-base that hated the remake because of a hand, the colour
black and an arbitrary rating could ever be irrational? I mean, obviously this film is
still bad. There are many things just wrong with it, but...well...let's get into it.
This movie had a budget higher than the first movie and yet it looks completely tacky in
comparison. Robocop's body looks more plastic in texture, the rehabs look like terrible
rip-offs of Stormtroopers, the CGI Doctor-Who-esque screensaver shown when RoboCop wakes up after
being shut-down was pretty annoying, his gun arm looked pathetic, the jet-pack-green-screen-effect
was terribly composited and essentially every practical effect looked fairly cheap and goofy.
That said, the score is a lot better than the last one. Basil Poledouris returns after
not showing up in 2 and it's so nice to actually hear that classic orchestral theme again after
its disappearance left one of many gaping holes in that last movie.
For a RoboCop movie though, there isn't really a lot of RoboCop in it. The character himself
doesn't get an entrance until about a fifth in and even then, the focus is more on the
rag-tag group of freedom-fighters as they fight against OCP and the rehabs. When he
does show up, he spends most of the time getting his robotic *** handed to him. Yeah, the movie's
not really flattering towards him. The premise is decent. It would only make
sense that OCP get the shaft after turning in *** product after *** product and
if they're going to have a merger with another company, it would make perfect sense for that
tech company to be Japanese. Shame the film refuses to live up to that
premise by having anti-climax after anti-climax. Frank Miller still wrote the story and script
for this one and it's obvious that he has been heavily neutered. I personally don't
mind that, as I found the overly dark and cynical nature of the previous movie to be
really grating, but I would've preferred a story that was at least more coherent instead
of schizophrenically skimming subplots without making any real attempt to function like a
story with a beginning, middle and end. If you write, 'RoboCop gets a jet-pack and
fights a cyborg samurai' into your screen-play, kudos to you, because that's a kick-*** idea.
If you then proceed to impotently mess that up because your direction is helplessly bland,
then you should probably rethink your career, something that Frank Dekker, the director
of RoboCop 3 along with Monster Squad and Night of the Creeps, evidently did.
Hell, even the cast don't give a ***, save for Robert John Burke, who was probably psyched
to play RoboCop because he got the movements down really well, despite not having a voice
that was anywhere near as commanding as Peter Weller's. But Nancy Allen definitely phoned
it in along with everyone else in this. In fact, enthusiasm's probably what could
have saved this film. Every few minutes of viewing, I noticed a glimpse of something
I liked in RoboCop 3, but then that glimpse turned sour as the film drowned itself in
terrible effects, bad writing, poor performances and just pure impotent film-making. Don't
get me wrong, it's on par with the second one. They're both horrible sequels to that
original masterpiece, but with that said, I am anticipating that remake. Maybe it could
be the true successor to RoboCop, who knows? Judging from the trailers alone, it's better
than Robocop 2 and 3.