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I first came into contact with my Prabhupāda, Bhaktisiddhānta Sarasvatī Goswami Mahārāja in 1931.
Ever since then I used to go to attend the evening kīrtan and part in the root Gauḍīya Math at Allahabad.
You see. But, Prabhupāda, Abhay Babhu, as we used to call him then, you see.
Abhay Babhu and I used to live in Allahabad.
Both of us lived in Allahabad and both of us used to go and attend
the evening Ārotik and kīrtan in root Gauḍīya Math.
So we started meeting there. Both he and I used to attend the evening Ārotik and kīrtan.
And I remember sometimes he would play mṛdaṅga, you see,
sometimes he would sing, He was very good at that, playing mṛdaṅga and kīrtan,
he was very good at that. He had a shop, it was a chemist then,
he had a shop in Jantaripura then later on he shifted to Bhadrikanga, a better locality.
And I remember he also used to manufacture his medicines
and occasionally he made some tonic and once or twice he gave me his tonics which I used.
Once it was so funny, here in the ISKCON temple someone asked me
in Prabhupāda’s presence, “Dr. Kapoor, how old are you?”
I said, “Well I am seventy-five, it was about ten years back perhaps more,
“What is the secret of your health?” I said, “Prabhupāda’s tonics.”
Prabhupāda laughed.
And there had been no such information about his leaving.
He was out of the house for some…
Usually he was going out of the house for his personal work or some business purposes.
But on the particular day, I don’t remember the exact date of that time,
as soon as he left home…
We were thinking that Prabhupāda will come back again to home in the evening,
that he usually used to do, but the particular date he left home he did not turn up again.
I asked Prabhupāda, “Prabhupāda, how you were separated from your family?”
He said my wife is a big drink tea… She was taking too much of teas.
So Prabhupāda told her whether you want me or tea? At that time she said “tea.”
So he said you do with your tea, I will go my own way.
Prabhupāda, I only met when there was a function, some religious function, in Kuruksettra.
It was very big, people had come for taking bath and all that.
And I had gone there with two or three people but they were not interested in talks,
they wanted to go round and eat and do something. I was not interested,
I was going round and seeing people.
So I met Prabhupāda sitting down below a tree because it was quite hot.
So we were sitting there and I asked him, “So Bābājī…” He was in white clothes.
So I talked with him for about half an hour or so.
At that time I don’t think he had become a sādhu or a sannyāsī, he was just…
Then he said, “My family is in Calcutta but I have come for this function here, to have bath here.”
That way we talked for some time and then he said, “Suppose I want to meet you?”
I gave him my card. Choksi, my office fellow, you know, he was with me.
So I called him and he gave him my card and all that and
“you come to Scindia House if you want to talk to us.”
After that he came to Scindia one evening very late.
I was still in the office doing some work then I got up and wanted to come home.
It was about seven o’clock. It was quite dark. Nobody was there.
And Choksi was sitting there at the table. So I asked him,
I said “Choksi, who is that gent sitting with you?”
Because Choksi was sitting on his table and swamiji was sitting like this, like I am sitting.
And Choksi was sitting at his table.
So he said that somebody has come, some swamiji, but he doesn’t listen to me.
He said, “No, I would like to meet her and then one day I will talk to her.”
I went there and said Hindi. Then he showed me Bhāgavata.
He said, “We have met in Kuruksettra, do you remember?
I want to get this book printed.”
I said, “You can come tomorrow when there are some people and daylight.”
Also at this time it was really getting darker. So Choksi is alone.
So he said, “Yes I’ll come.”
Then I… still I asked Choksi, because secretary was there, so he typed out a letter
to one or two friends, they are no more now. So, telling them that,
“Why don’t you do something about this gentlemen, he has written Bhāgavata
and I would like you to help him. And I am going to do this, this much.”
I wrote that letter and gave him. He went and then I went home.
After a day he came and he said, “Now I am going back to Vṛndāvana.”
I said, “Why are you going?” He said, “My work is done.”
Now I will try to see how I can get it printed.
My association with Bhaktivedanta Mahārāja Prabhupāda increased more and more
and naturally we would always talk of Kṛṣṇa and Prabhupāda and so on.
In 1932, the year after that, I joined this parikrama.
Prabhupāda couldn’t join because he was in business you see.
He was in business, he couldn’t come.
When I returned from the parikrama he asked me about the parikrama
and I had to tell him what happened you see. For a number of days he…
For about five, six years we were together at Allahabad, you see.
And we used to meet almost every day. After that I joined government service.
After that we didn’t meet for a very long time. I think about twenty-five or thirty years.
When I retired from government service I came to stay here in Vṛndāvana
and I had lost all contact with Prabhupāda. I did not know what had happened to him.
Perhaps he did not know about me.
One day accidentally I was in Radha-Damodar temple here, sitting in the veranda,
waiting for someone and I saw Prabhupāda coming out of his room.
He was then staying here, you see.
He came out, with two American disciples.
Prabhupāda naturally was in sannyāsa vesh [dress] at this time
and actually I couldn’t recognize him. He was so much…
Years had changed, and he was now a sannyāsī so he was completely changed.
And I had also changed, but not so much as Prabhupāda, so he just kept gazing at me.
And then after some time he just said, “Yes. Dr. Kapoor.”
I recognized him from his voice. I said, “Abhay Babhu?” And he embraced me. You see?
Sometimes you recognize your old friends from voice more than from face.
As soon as he said, “Dr. Kapoor,” I recognized him.
So then, he was going somewhere, he cancelled his program and took me inside his room
and told me about all the work he had done. He had just returned from…
I think after his way to America this was the first time he had come back.
He was now an international figure and he told me about the work that he had done,
showed me the newspaper cuttings and so on.
All of a sudden one day he came to office and he said, “I want to go to America.”
I said, “Are you crazy?” Why do you want to go there? What will you do?
You know American government, you know sometimes they are very funny.
They will send you back. So once it goes on record that you are sent back
they won’t let you in. Why do you want to go there?
And at that time so many people were not going to America. Now it is quite different.
So I said, “Why do you want to go there?” So he won’t listen. - What does it mean?
“Old man, you are going to die.” Like this. Who will look after you? What will you do there?
So he said… I said, “All right, I’ll make this arrangement, then you go.”
So when the arrangement was made he was in Bombay.
I made all the arrangements with the captain and the ship went to load some ports.
Then it came back. At that time our other ship dropped him at…
I think he went from Calcutta. So the other ship went and dropped him there
and then he went by that ship.
He was deciding before he left India. He was staying in a dharmashalla,
that is free lodging and all of that, North Calcutta,
and I had taken him off from there by a taxi. lmmediately we rushed to…
Very early morning at about five, five-thirty.
I said nothing because I was very much shocked that he was leaving us.
lmmediately he realized our mental position and he advised me,
“Don’t be worried. I will soon be returning to India, and take your news and all of that.
Let me come back.”
I would talk on the telephone with him.
Because I had told the captain that you see he talks to me so there is no trouble for him.
He used to. So you know this Gokulastami day? Yes. Kṛṣṇa Janmāṣṭamī. Yes.
He was in Suret. So he phoned me, captain phoned me. He said, on board the…
they had to cross the Suez Channel. So Captain phoned me.
That today is Gokulastami and on board the ship they were having a meeting
and swamiji was talking to us and then we will distribute sweets
which we got and everyone and then we will have some bhajan record playing and all that.
I was associated in the same compartment, in the ship, that cabin I mean, that ship cabin.
That was a cargo ship, that was not a passenger ship.
So apart from the captain’s room one apartment was there, an extra.
And he was offered that room to go to his destination.
And after reaching Boston port I got a letter from him and from that letter I was informed
he was attacked twice in heart attack in the same ship in the journey of twenty-three days
to reach over to Boston. And immediately he asked me to send a medicine. That ayurvedic.
He mentioned the name of that medicine and immediately I rushed to the shop
and bought it, immediately sent it to him by air post and he acknowledged
that medicine and told me that…At that time my mental value was not quite so good,
because of his sickness and all of that. Because he was quite aged at that time.
And it was obvious to become sad, after all he was our father.
So immediately I sent this medicine to him in his address in the USA
and he acknowledged it and he recovered very fast and all of our family was pleased.
I talked with the swamiji on the telephone. So he said, “No, no, I am quite all right,
but I am very sea sick..” So I was talking to this captain and all that, so he said to tell me,
little mata, that “I am going to die now.” He was very much sea sick,
he was not feeling comfortable. So he phoned me also. I said,
“Abhay, you are not going to do, don’t worry. Seasickness doesn’t kill anybody.”
Then he was not feeling very comfortable because the sea was not very good at that time.
Little rough. The captain phoned me and I talked to Swamiji.
We went to Warden Rd. Akasha Gaṅgā where this Hare Kṛṣṇa devotee was staying.
I went there and met the swami, Madhudviṣa who was the in-charge of the devotees.
I sat for a few minutes and then I was told by Madhudviṣa that Guruji
came just now from America and he is sitting in another room so you come with me
and take the darshan of Guruji. So I went to that room with Madhudviṣa
to take the darshan of Guruji.
After sitting some time Guruji asked me, “Where are you living?” I said, “At Gauragong.”
Then Guruji asked, “What are you doing?” I said, “My business is construction.”
So Guruji asked when you are getting up early in the morning and what are you doing?
And I said, “When I am getting up in morning I am taking one cup of tea
and going to toilet and taking bath and then going to work.
Then guruji suddenly said, “Then what is difference between pig and you?
You are just like a pig.” Then I said, “Yes Mahārāja, please advise me
that how can I change my life.” Then Guruji said, “You must do service to Kṛṣṇa.”
Then I said, “I am not associated with any spiritual movement
or the saint or the devotees.
So Guruji said “From tomorrow my devotees will come to your house early in the morning
and then you do the nāga saṅkīrtana there with my devotees
and then all the devotees will take feast, lunch, at your home
and you will be involved in this way in the spiritual movement.”
One day while giving Prabhupāda his prasādam I asked him,
“Prabhupāda, what is your favorite preparation.”
Prabhupāda replied saying that he likes all the preparations. I enquired again,
“No Prabhupāda, what is your most favorite preparation?”
Then Prabhupāda said that his favorite preparation is śuktā.
So I used to cook four or five types of śuktā for Prabhupāda every day.
Whenever I would take Prabhupāda his prasādam he would say,
“You have cooked so much prasādam for me but first give me the śuktā.”
So I would always give Prabhupāda the śuktā first.
When we purchased this land, there was living so many cractolis peoples
who were doing the liquor business and there was also, after some time,
quarrel with Mr. Nair. This land was called Nayavadi, now it is Hare Kṛṣṇa Land.
So one day Guruji was here, we were sitting in this you know, Annete Road…
Valaya’s house. Guruji was there, myself, Valaya and my wife was there in that room.
Valaya said to Guruji that Guruji Mr. Nair will not give you this land
because he was offered by some hotel owner for thirty-six lakhs
and you are purchasing for fourteen lakhs.
And Mr. Nair has to pay so much income tax so he must have changed his idea
and he will give the land to that person who has offered thirty-six lakhs.
Then Guruji said, “It does not matter, if he doesn’t want to give this land to us
then he must return our money.
But I don’t think that he can pay the income tax in this life.
So Guruji went at night to Sydney and when we woke up in the morning
we heard that Mr. Nair’s heart failed and he died.
So you can imagine that all Guruji said that, “I can’t think that Mr. Nair can pay his
income tax burden in this life.” So Mr. Nair, finished.
I was cooking prasādam for Prabhupāda every day.
One day somehow the prasad was late so Pālikā cooked something quickly and
took it to Prabhupāda. Prabhupāda asked, “Where is the prasad that Kishorie cooked?”
And he immediately asked the devotee to phone the big kitchen
and find out why the prasad was late. So I hurried and quickly took the prasad to
Prabhupāda’s house and when I got to the house Prabhupāda was standing
in front of the stairs. I immediately put my head down and took the prasad inside.
Just as I was leaving the house Prabhupāda asked me, “Why are you crying?”
I said, “Prabhupāda because I delayed your prasad today.” Prabhupāda said,
“I am not upset about that. What I am worried about is if you delay my prasad
then you might one day delay Rādhā-Mādhav’s prasad,
and if you delay Rādhā-Mādhav’s prasad then He might become upset.
That is why I have asked why my prasad was late.”
He is always speaking truth you see, and always quoting from Bhāgavatam,
Śrīmad Bhagavad-gītā and from Caitanya-caritāmṛta.
Always quoting some ślokas from those places.
But he was so simple to answer those questions to us that anyone, even an atheist,
will feel that, “I should be in touch always with Prabhupāda.”
He had a smiling face. I am seeing that he is the celestial flower of the paradise.
How affectionate man he is. I can’t remember,
I can’t place the actual meaning of such smiling. I have never seen such a smile.
Prabhupāda used to go for a japa walk every morning with his disciples
after Mangal-Aroti. Some days he would walk to the Math.
Some days he would walk along the Ganges.
Some days he would walk around the pukor, some days he would come to the kitchen.
After the japa walk Prabhupāda would come to guru-pūjā and as devotees
would offer flowers to him he would give them prasādam.
He said to me, “Dr. Kapoor, forgive me for my offenses.
I don’t know what he really meant. I said, “What do you mean, what offenses?”
That was his greatness I think, his humility. He had benediction from Mahāprabhu.
What offenses? I cannot understand what you mean. Humility, what else?
After Prabhupāda would take darshan of Rādhā Madhav
he would go around the Deities three times.
Each time he would stop and ring the bell and then he would raise his arms and dance.
All the devotees would dance with him in ecstasy.
When children would pass in front of him he would stop again and dance.
In this way he would go around the Deities three times.
I can only speak what I know from reading Prabhupāda’s books
because I never saw Prabhupāda personally.
I may not be able to do what Prabhupāda did but I know that in order to get free
from this material existence, I should follow in his footsteps
and follow the path he has shown.
In the future I will try to dedicate my mind and life to Kṛṣṇa and of course Prabhupāda too.
He advised me in 1977, three or four months before his disappearance,
“Please take care of your mother and your family because I left home.
“And you are two brothers and your elder brother has become very inactive
“so you must be very careful to take the responsibilities and all of the things
“that are required for benefiting your family and all other members.”
He was telling me that, “I’m going to build an ashram in Vṛndāvana.
So I am going to build a special place for you to stay. When you go I’ll come.
At last he went from there. I know, he sent me a letter,
“I’m going to Vṛndāvana now and I don’t thing that I will come [back].”
He knew that he was going to go.
I told him also, “We’ll get doctor.” He said “no, no.” Very nice man.
As a man also he was very nice. Very kind, very soft. The man has done so much.
And what did he take? Nothing. And he has left behind such a big landmark.
Not only religion. Religion, culture, everything. All over the world.
We must try to see that whatever he has done is kept.
You can’t increase, all right, but you must keep it. It must remain alive.
That is what I see.
We are deeply charmed and we are very much proud of our father
that is your spiritual master, and of course you are also our spiritual guide.
We are charmed and pleased. No ordinary people can do it.
It is absolutely impossible for them to make a good mission
and big mission and wide range of propagation and all other because…
We feel very much proud of our father and this is our ultimate conclusion.