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♪ There's a hundred and four days of summer vacation
♪ and school comes along just to end it
♪ So the annual problem for our generation
♪ is finding a good way to spend it
♪ Like maybe
♪ Building a rocket, or fighting a mummy
♪ or climbing up the Eiffel Tower
♪ Discovering something that doesn't exist
Hey!
♪ Or giving a monkey a shower
♪ Surfing tidal waves
♪ Creating nano-bots or locating Frankenstein's brain
It's over here!
♪ Finding a dodo bird Painting a continent
♪ Or driving our sister insane
Phineas!
♪ As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do
♪ before school starts this fall
Come on, Perry!
♪ So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all!
♪ So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! ♪
Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!
DAD: Nice to see you boys down here at the shop!
Wow, what's that thing?
Oh, this? It's an escape chamber from an old vaudeville show.
In the old days, men would go into these things
and pretend to be locked inside.
Then they would "escape" to the amazement of the crowd.
Here, let me show you.
You see, all you need to do is just... um... Hmm.
You need a little help, Dad?
Well, no, I know...I just don't know, I just need to... um... Oh!,
Thank you. Thanks, Son!
Well, I've got bottle caps to polish!
Dude! I know what we're gonna do today.
Oh, no, I'm late for my introduction to ice sculpture!
(SNORING)
I suppose there's no need to wake her.
Where's Perry?
And the salad fork is the one on the outside.
And you're certain of that... Ah! Agent P!
As you may know, this is International Good Manners Day.
Perhaps, not ironically,
Dr. Doofenshmirtz has chosen this very week
to create a device that causes rampant rudeness.
Go take care of it.
If you please.
I bet he calls it the Rude-inator.
What does that make you, Nostradamus?
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls!
My brother and I are here today to give you a thrilling display
of escapement arts as we attempt,
to extricate ourselves from this,
the most complicated trap ever devised by man or child!
A computer controlled tower so fiendishly clever that
its blueprints had to be viewed in a smoked mirror
to avoid driving its creators insane!
Wow, he's really selling it hard.
But if you designed the tower
will you not know every way to get out?
We programed it to learn as it goes,
so it's conceivable we could be trapped in there forever.
Coming with?
No!
No.
That's okay.
You guys can stay out here
and be the cheering section with Candace.
Must bust Phineas and Ferb.
But what if you do not come out?
If we're not out in 15 minutes,
you can smash the machine and rescue us,
just like in the old days.
Sounds like a party.
Ferb? Start the timer please!
Synchronizing watches!
Women and children and the faint of heart may wish to leave now.
So we bid you adieu!
Goodbye! Auf wiedersehen!
Farewell, friends!
And we'll see you in a few minutes!
Or not at all!
(TIMER BEEPING)
Legally speaking, what is our liability here?
CHORUS: (SINGING) Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated!
A-ha!
I wanted to say something clever
about "cat got your tongue" but I haven't worked it out.
You see, when we were small children,
my brother Roger was always better at the whole manners and etiquette thing.
Sweet Aunt Effie, you have always been my favorite!
Roger, so polite. Heinz?
That's some mole!
(SIGHS) It takes a long time to clean out a chicken coop with a spoon.
And I still don't see how that was rude.
I mean, that thing was gargantuan.
If anything, I was showing restraint.
Anyway, today, it is International Good Manners Day,
and we've got a visiting dignitary.
She's the ambassador from England!
Only the most ettiquetty country in the whole world, hello!
And when Roger's introducing her
I'm going to zap him with my Rude-inator!
That's what I'm calling it.
It makes whoever it zaps intolerably rude!
He'll cause an international incident!
And in all the confusion I'll just waltz in and take over!
So, why the catsuit?
Well, we're going to be at City Hall to watch the fireworks, you and me,
and I figured a platypus in a fedora might attract too much attention!
Smart, huh? See, me, always thinking.
Good day to you, Tower. We're ready to begin.
TOWER: Welcome, boys. We're gonna have so much fun together.
Put on your coats and stay a while.
Strait-jackets.
Classic. Ready?
Okay, shake me out. Awesome!
This is gonna be fun.
I don't know, Ferb, I think we should "file" this under Dungeon Escape.
Well, here we are!
(CHUCKLES) Right up close!
You sit here, Perry the Catypus.
(LAUGHS) I just came up with that.
That totally makes up for missing the "cat got your tongue" thing from before.
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to City Hall on this fine first day of National Etiquette Week.
WOMAN: I do love proper etiquette!
Hmm. Big keys, tiny doors.
We're not fitting through any of those, but maybe that one!
Ferb, you're a genius!
TOWER: Nice warm up, boys.
But can you escape the relentless pull of gravity?
(SCREAMING)
It's the Bottomless Pit Trap.
It would be terrible if they did not come out!
I know!
I'm counting on it.
And to speak further on this topic,
it is my great pleasure to introduce
the Ambassador from England,
Told you!
...and my personal friend...
...this unbelievable windbag right here.
(MAN COUGHING)
Oh, man! On and on and on in the limo over here.
(MIMICKING AMBASSADOR) "Manners are so important."
Can you believe this, Perry...
Oh, for Pete's sake, Perry the Platypus.
I told you to go before we left.
He better bring back some popcorn, that's all I can say.
ROGER: ...what a pompous know-it-all you are.
That's it! I want a recall.
ALL: Recall! Recall! Recall!
It's working!
Wait! I've got it. Give me your hands.
Come on, Tower! Is that the best you can throw at us?
TOWER: Oooh, so special.
I don't give a flying buttress.
Tower, are you feeling okay?
What's it to you?
Nothing, nothing. I thought we programed you to be more polite than this.
You think you're so sharp, don't you?
I'm gonna show you something sharper.
I think there may be something wrong with the Tower.
I'm taking suggestions here.
Okay, dude, don't show off.
♪ I used to get stuck on the simplest of things
♪ I never tried flying or spreading my wings
♪ What I want to convey is that I'm getting away
♪ 'Cause tonight I'm breaking out
CHORUS: ♪ He is breaking out
♪ I went from park to neutral
♪ Now I'm shifting to drive
♪ 'Cause you gotta depart if you want to arrive
♪ No more biding my time with these eternal rhymes
♪ 'Cause tonight I'm breaking out
CHORUS: ♪ I'm breaking out
♪ From the things that were holding me back
CHORUS: ♪ I'm breaking out
♪ In every wall if you look there is a crack
CHORUS: ♪ I'm breaking out
♪ In the end that's what life is all about
♪ When the wall's closing in
♪ You know it's time to begin
♪ Breaking out ♪
Oh, my gosh! It is almost time.
What if they can't get out?
How come you guys didn't tell me about this before?
Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma.
Made it. Boy! That was close.
(CHEERING)
Was it hard?
Do I still get to smash the tower?
I ain't done with you yet.
BUFORD: Wow! I thought I had a bad attitude.
...and so's your sister!
Wow! Such rudeness. This is working better than I ever imagined.
Miss High-and-Mighty English Manners Person,
I have got one thing to say to you. And only one thing.
That's some...
(LAUGHING)
...show we just put on, isn't it, Madam Mayor?
What the...
You see, your wonderful Mayor and I
agreed in the limousine to put on this little play
for your edification.
No, no, no, no.
Indeed, what would we be without manners?
ALL: Four more years. Four more years.
Curse you, Perry the Platypus.
I didn't even get my popcorn.
Wait. If they were faking it, what did my ray hit?
TOWER: Ooh, it looks like you two losers are still trapped.
Might as well change your address,
'cause you're gonna be receiving your pension in here.
Oopsie, activated my vacuum circuits.
You dummies don't need air, do you?
(BLOWING RASPBERRY)
I'm feeling such an odd mixture of pride and mortal terror.
Don't worry, I'll get you out in just a sec.
You guys are on your own.
Well, thanks for trying I guess.
No problem. What are friends for?
Friends?
I have been programed to trap you and your friends.
PHINEAS: Oh, yeah!
Do me a favor.
Next time you wanna make a fiendishly clever computer- controlled contraption,
call one of your other friends.
Hey! That's it. Tower.
You were programed to trap Ferb and me and our friends.
But we've got friends all over Danville.
Is that so?
In fact, we have friends all over the tri-state area.
Well, aren't we popular?
Plus there was that small matter of circumnavigating the globe.
You're right. Tokyo, Paris, Nepal.
We have friends all over the Earth.
Look, at me, I have got friends all over the Earth.
All right then.
In fact, we even have an alien friend named Meap.
He is from another planet.
So, really, we have friends all over the galaxy.
A small matter for one such as me.
You will never escape. Never!
That works for me.
Well, they only make mallets so big.
So, the entire galaxy.
That enough elbow room for ya?
Well, for today.
At last after two millennia
we finally reached the Milky Way Galaxy.
Battle stations! We begin our assault
in three, two...
Oh!
Uh, anybody got a mallet?
CHORUS: (SINGING) Doofenshmirtz in his underwear.
I can't believe it. Just moments away from
finally achieving full control of the tri-state area!
And I owe it all to you, Perry the Platypus,
my trusted butler.
I won! I won!
No! Why didn't you listen? Why?
Quiet, you. I will not let you ruin this moment of pure joy!
COMPUTER: Joy located.
Oh, my gosh. Everybody, it's Li'l Saul
and the Breakingham Palace Crew.
Oy, poi, poi and a deetle, deetle, deetle.
(THUMPING MUSIC PLAYING)
This party's gonna be off the hook.
It's not how it looks!
Uh, I think this is your hat.
I'll just be leaving now.
Well, this day couldn't get any weirder.
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
Well, I'm about to be proven wrong.
Hi, Candace.
Mom, Mom! The cheese mountain remains,
but the people have fled en masse.
What are you talking about? What people?
(NARRATOR READS)
Come back!
Wait! High five.
Hey, don't leave me hanging.
Mom! Cheese! Scary! Home! Now!
High five.
What happened to that guy?
(NARRATOR READS)
Sir, I think Agent P is working for...
Sir? No, don't do it. Don't do it!
(AIR HORN BLOWS)
No!
We'll have none of that, Mr. Squirrel Man.
Besides, you're too late.
Ever since Perry the Platypus
quit your agency to become my butler,
I have been freed up to create my ultimate inator,
the Vaporizer-inator!
With my mind now clear, I stumbled onto a scientific fact.
Every object on Earth, when heated to a certain temperature, evaporates!
With this, I'll be able to vaporize things at will
and cause all kinds of mayhem.
I am a genius! For realsies this time.
Now, to your station, Perry the Butler.
Get ready, boys! When this baby powers up,
it's gonna get hot in here!
Happy place. Happy place!
Let's find our first target.
How about all the sand at the beach!
Wait. Hey, where is everybody?
(NARRATOR READS)
(ALL CHATTING)
Wow! I think this is the biggest turn-out we've had all summer.
Eh, Buford?
Yep. It couldn't get any cheddar than this.
How do you keep coming up with them?
Showtime, Ferb.
(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING)
Cheesetopia is now open.
♪ My fever starts to climb above a hundred degrees
♪ When I fly through the breeze with ease upon my cheese trapeze
♪ They know the cheese with ease-box squeeze, that is my expertise
♪ Cheesetopia
CHORUS: ♪ Cheesetopia
♪ Your cheese become realityams
♪ Your fantasies up to your knees
♪ Please try some cheddar peas and taste the Gouda cheese
♪ Cheesetopia ♪
PHINEAS: It's like utopia with cheese.
Cheese? Cheese?
Our cheese-eating contest is about to begin!
Cheese!
Sir! Oh, why isn't he answering?
Oh, Agent P. If only you had your hat.
(NARRATOR READS)
Shoot!
♪ Perry's hat
♪ Floats on the wind
♪ I wonder where
♪ It is going
♪ Is there a head
♪ It will anoint?
♪ Is this herring red
♪ Or a plot point
♪ Perry's hat ♪
That squirrel man dropped his hat. I should return it.
I wonder what he's doing up there.
Oh, well. I gotta find out what happened to Agent P.
(GASPS)
(SHUDDERS)
Oh, and I just sprayed for squirrel men.
Well, now, it appears that fate has
dumped our mysterious guest like an immense pile of assorted cheeses
onto the lawn of my evil lab.
I know, it's a strange metaphor, but I stand by it.
Oh, Agent P, what have you been up to?
(NARRATOR READS)
Very good, Perry the Butler.
The trash chute is right down the hall.
Hey, wait, you forgot... (GASPS)
Oh, look at this thing, huh? Such memories.
All the adventures, the excitement,
the pummeling, the thwarting. Oh!
You know, I'm feeling rather sentimental about it.
Oh, well!
Man, am I pumped for Squirrel Con!
Yeah! With everyone in costume,
there'll be no baleful looks of judgment.
Hey, this is Agent P's hat.
There must be something wrong.
Major Monogram, we have a problem. Look!
Well, that doesn't look good.
You can clearly see your zipper in the costume!
No. Agent P's hat.
Oh. Well, then, maybe you should look into it.
Me? Like a real agent? Yes, sir!
As for me, I'm off to Cheesetopia! It's utopia with cheese.
Sir, you remember what happens when you eat cheese?
Uh, I've been cleared by the doctors. Anyways, good luck, Carl.
Yes! Squirrel Con will have to wait.
Poor guy. I finished my deliveries early
so I wouldn't have to miss this.
(NARRATOR READS)
Last delivery of the day.
Okay! Just dump it right there
like a caged guy in a squirrel costume.
What? I stand by that metaphor.
All right, Baljeet, I need you to help Ferb with the foundation.
I am on it!
Isabella, you and the Fireside Girls spread the word.
Girls, get ready to get our Flyer Delivery patches.
Again?
Is there something you'd like to say, Addison?
And Buford, keep the cheese puns coming.
Sounds gouda to me.
(SNIFFS)
All right, who cut the cheese?
Sorry.
(NARRATOR READS)
And then I typed "L-O-L" but it came out "L-O-P,"
and Jeremy thought I meant... (SNIFFS)
What's that smell? I'll call you later, Stacy.
Cheese, huh? That warrants a call to Mom.
What was that?
(NARRATOR READS)
(ALL LAUGHING)
Ah, cheese. Hey, where's Perry?
Morning, Agent P. Sorry about the extreme close-up.
Carl's off today, and for the life of me
I can't figure out how to work this thing.
Anyway, we have reason to believe
Doofenshmirtz is up to no good.
Again, since Carl is out,
I'll have to do the visual reference myself.
(CLEARS THROAT) He's recently purchased a small tux,
a silver tray, and a pair of white gloves.
(CHUCKLES) I traced my hand for that one.
Ooh! Check this out.
Look, it's Agent T!
What, too soon?
(SNIFFS) Cheese?
(NARRATOR READS)
Why cheese?
'Cause cheese is cool no matter how you slice it.
What? Am I provolone on this?
No, I guess it's as good an idea as any.
Nice cheese puns, by the way.
That's nothing. I havarti got a whole list of them.
Besides, with the change in plans,
we have nothing else prepared.
Yeah, what did happen to your first invention?
(NARRATOR READS)
Mom, wait, don't leave yet!
Li'l Saul and the entire Breakingham Palace Crew are in here.
Come on, I know you're in there, Saul!
COMPUTER: Joy located.
Uh...
Oy, poi, poi and a deetle, deetle, deetle.
Never mind! Have fun running errands.
But Saul and his crew were unemployed,
and so I finally found them full-time work
in my celebration-seeking rocket.
It hones in on joy, activates,
and is guaranteed to kick any party up to an 11.
Hey, where did it go?
Now you know how I feel.
Well, wherever it landed, I hope they can handle a party of that magnitude.
(NARRATOR READS)
I'm not sure I can handle a party of this magnitude.
Either way, we've got enough power for the inator now, Perry the Butler.
You better tend to the guests.
Agent P, how could you have turned to the dark side?
How could you have forsaken all that's good and right
to be that maniac's butler?
You don't belong in that uniform.
You belong in this hat! See?
Perry the Platypus! You have grape juice on your shirt.
I can't have my manservant looking like a street urchin.
You should go clean up before it sets.
(GROANS) It's so hard to get good help these days,
even when you ride them like a bicycle.
When my Butler-inator is finished with you,
not only will you have a perfectly-tailored uniform and wig,
but you will actually think you are my butler.
You won't even remember that you fight evil for a living.
(ECHOING) You won't even remember that you fight evil for a living.
You fight evil.
Man, you really kicked this party up to an 11, man.
Perry the Platypus, what's gotten into you?
"Thait I live"? What's, what's that? Some, some new band?
(GASPS) Oh! "I fight evil!"
Very clever. You wrote a note to yourself in the future.
I would not have predicted that.
Mom, Mom, Mom! Cheese, cheese, cheese!
Candace, you know, we do have a nice backyard.
Although, I never noticed that cheese smell before.
My inator!
Oy, the joy. It drops.
Time for us to go already.
Oy, poi, poi and a deetle, deetle, deetle.
Well, no Saul, no ball. Let's split.
Wait, wait. I was just about to break out the bubble machine.
Curse you, Perry the Platypus!
And you, too, large squirrel man
creature hybrid thing!
Huh. Who would have thought a high-fiving swollen guy
would have scared everyone off like that?
(ALL GASPING)
I don't get it. Cheesetopia was just here.
Huh. That's Swiss-picious.
Well, I did it. A hundred cheese puns!
Oh, and look. There's Perry.
And scene.
ALL: Ooh.
Cheesetopia is now open!
♪ My fever a hundred degreesbove
♪ When I fly through upon my cheese trapeze
♪ They know the cheese that is my expertisee,
♪ Cheesetopia
CHORUS: ♪ Cheesetopia
♪ Cheesetopia
CHORUS: ♪ Cheesetopia
♪ Cheesetopia ♪
PHINEAS: It's like utopia with cheese.