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The last thing I expected was for this game to surprise me. With a name like Dogz 2, you
have a pretty good idea what to expect. Nintendogs on a budget, right? Only this isn't Nintendogs
on a budget. It isn't even close to what you'd expect.
In fact, it's barely a pet game at all.
Of course, it doesn't start that way. It kind of dupes you into thinking it's going to be
precisely that—a cheaper, less-good version of Nintendogs. You pick your dog from a selection
of 11 different breeds, and then you end up back home. Your dog is on the touch screen,
you can use the stylus to pet it...looks pretty familiar.
Then you realize...this is, just, an interior decoration simulator.
See, it's not long before...that dog that you picked? It becomes almost completely useless.
Those usual pet game options of feeding, bathing, clipping, playing...they're nowhere to be
found. Instead, you get to watch the dog, as it...walks around. Checks out your decorations.
Which may or may not ever do anything.
So what do you actually do in Dogz 2? Well, like I said, it's really just an interior
decorating game. Freaking Avon: The Game, or something. There's this list of items,
and you have to buy them. They're like Pokemon. You're supposed to collect 'em all, only instead
of battling with them, you put them on coffee tables. Oh, and you don't really buy them,
either. You win them.
By playing cards.
What the hell's going on?
So let's recap, here. It's a decorating game, so you're placing items in your house, rearranging
furniture and wallpaper, that kind of thing. It's a pet game in that...strange animals
wander into your house to ruin it. And you get those decorations...by playing poker.
Because you know who's really good at poker?
The 12-year-old girls, who play games like Dogz 2.
What are they betting? Nickels?
So honestly, I just...I have no idea who thought this was a good idea. It's just such a strange
combination, and none of the elements make any sense together. Why make people play poker
to unlock a frisbee? And the worst part is...that's the entirety of the game. Playing these minigames,
collecting the objects and then decorating.
And the minigames start to repeat themselves after just a few objects.
Dogz 2 is not a pet game, and as much as I appreciate trying something different, it's
also kind of bad form to sell a game as something it's not. It's a weird decision at best and
deceptive at worst. And you could live with that if the game were good, but...it's bowling,
and blackjack. I can't tell if Dogz 2 is a game for little children or drunken reprobates.
But whatever it is...it's not very good.
Thanks to our homegirl Felicity from the UK for sending it in.