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BETH HOYT: Hello to South Africa, Australia, Lithuania,
Poland, Spain, Sweden, Denmark, USA.
Did I miss you?
Thank you for watching.
Let's do this.
Sweden.
Did I miss Sweden?
Hey everyone.
It's me, Beth Hoyt.
Welcome to My Damn Channel LIVE.
Now hold everything if you're watching this On Demand.
Are you?
Yes.
OK.
Then click on this annotation, and watch the show in playlist
format because it's prettier and easier.
Just like me.
Just kidding.
I'm not that easy.
Of course I am.
Now back to the show.
Hi there.
Welcome to My Damn Channel LIVE.
And welcome to the unofficial start of summer.
Remember, this summer we're experiencing right now is
unofficial.
It's not officially summer until June 20.
So half an hour from now, don't go around telling all
your friends that today's show was the summer's best because
everyone's going to make fun of you.
Today's show is going to be the unofficial summer's best.
Because we've got My Damn Channel
original video premieres.
And not one, not two, not three, not four--
three.
We got three.
Just three special guests.
That's still pretty good.
On the show today, we've got comedian Max Silvestri,
Videogum's Gabe Delahaye, and our very own Daily Grace.
We're going to throw the world's
first internet barbecue.
Is it?
Probably not the first.
I'm going to keep saying that.
It's my first one.
And we're going to have a mega answering your comments and
your Tweets sesh with you guys.
So comment now or tweet at me or Gabe or Max or Grace with
the #MyDamnChannelLive.
And later, we're going to roast a pig.
No joke.
We've got a lot to get to.
So let's get to it.
First up, it's a premiere of the latest Daddy Knows Best.
It's starring The League's Steve Rannazzisi.
You know him, you love him, you're glad you're
not married to him.
Get ready for a My Damn Channel original comedy
premiere called
"Special Brownies." -Wow.
-Huh?
-Wow.
-Impressive.
-You're making Jack's brownies?
-I am indeed.
I am.
And--
-Wow.
-And I made a batch for myself, for this guy.
-Look at you.
Yeah, I'm loving this, by the way.
I really like it.
-This is, uh, masculinity.
-Yeah.
-What's say after I make these brownies, I uh, get to glaze
those melons.
No?
-So gross.
-All right.
All right, babe.
I love you.
We-- we've still got Daddy's medicine, huh?
What do we have here?
Mmmm, Colombian Skull ***.
Let's put a little bit in there.
That's a little conservative for my taste.
How 'bout the Paula Deen portion?
Yeah.
Mix it up.
[HUMMING]
Hey babe.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Hey honey.
-Babe, where are the brownies with the green top?
-Oh, I dropped it off at the Swardsons' with Jack.
Thanks--
-Oh, ***!
No!
-What the ***, man?
-Uh, Steve?
Barbara just called me.
She was hysterical.
She said that you sprinted into her house and you were
slapping brownies out of the kids' hands.
-Barbara is such a narc, babe.
Yes, I did go over to their house, and I was slapping
brownies out of kids' hands.
But there's a method for my madness.
-I'm all ears.
-Oh, where do I begin?
I was at the grocery store, and I saw this
gigantic fatso kid.
And I thought to myself, god, this is awful.
This child obesity is an epidemic.
-So this is what it was all about?
-Yeah.
-Did you do something to these?
-No, I just--
I probably added too much oil.
Or pot.
-Are you kidding?
-Good?
-Yeah.
Good.
Oh, look at that.
-Oh, they're gone.
-Oh, good.
-Happy?
Huh?
-I am.
Let me see those hands.
-There.
There you go, doubting Thomas.
-Yeah, I guess uh--
I'd like to see that other hand now.
-Ahh!
Ah, yeah.
-No, Steve.
No!
-Oh, dammit.
What?
-Hey, man.
Someone just threw away some pot brownies.
Can you believe it?
-Yeah, man.
Those are my pot brownies.
Did you eat them all?
-No, man.
There's more in here.
Come on in.
-What?
No.
Just--
god, just find me one.
Oh.
-Man, that is some good weed.
I'm *** up.
-Oh my god.
Do you have anything to wash this down with?
-I got a little bit of mine here.
-Oh.
BETH HOYT: Wow.
The beginning of that video made me so hungry, right?
And then that end brownie just made me so not.
Germany, Canada, Sweden, USA, Michigan,
New Jersey, the moon.
I'm sorry.
I can't--
Netherlands.
There.
We're done with that.
OK, you guys.
I'm hosting this internet barbecue today, naturally.
And I just really need my outfit to sing.
I'm feeling uncomfortable in this shirt.
I'm just going to take a few layers off.
I'm just overdressed.
Just bear with me for a second.
I'll keep hanging out with you, though.
I'm just going to get dressed here.
I'm just going to take this one off because we're not
going to wear that.
And also, I'm just going to have to get into this.
Sorry, excuse me.
And then also, this is the one I wear under that because I
don't need that.
And I don't know what I was think-- we're probably not
going to go swimming because there's no pool
in the studio, actually.
And this one, I don't know what I was thinking.
This is not that kind of party.
But I'm not going to wear that.
Also, I had this on just in case.
Oh god.
I had my prom dress.
I was just thinking maybe it'd be fancy, but I think I'm just
going to try and be casual.
And this is just because I get cold so easily.
I wear it on my tummy.
It's just a belly warmer.
I don't think I need that though today.
Actually, yeah, this is good.
I'll just go with this.
Yeah, here we are.
OK.
So in a few minutes, Max Silvestri will be here.
And we're going to start making some
food for our party.
But up next, we have another My Damn Channel original
comedy premiere.
I love this so much.
I love this guy.
You guys, seriously, for real, honest ***--
that was probably racist--
I'm just trying to connect with you guys because this
video's so funny.
Oh man.
Captain Hippo makes fake
commercials for My Damn Channel.
And here is one.
It's from Product Displacement.
It's called Mortmer Exterminators.
Oh, and do you like this?
I think--
I don't like--
I'm going to change.
Watch this.
I'm going to switch.
-Hi.
I'm Frank Mortmer, owner and operations manager of Mortmer
Exterminators.
Mortmer Exterminators has been servicing the Portsmouth, Ohio
area for over 40 years.
Here at Mortmer, there's no pest too big or too small.
We guarantee you'll be completely satisfied--
hey, whoa.
Was that thing there the whole time?
It's just a little bug, right?
Well, you give us a call, and we'll make sure your
house is pest free.
I feel like it's sitting on the back my [BLEEP]
neck.
Can someone else-- can someone just get a paper towel and
smush this thing?
Get it!
You got it?
I'm Frank Mortmer.
I can't even think anymore.
I'm going to get bit.
And I'm going to die.
And then you guys are going to have to live with my [BLEEP]
ghost.
We guarantee you'll be completely
satisfied with our service.
Give us a call, and we'll make sure your house is pest free.
-Eww, get me Frank Mortmer.
-Oh!
No, no, no, no.
-Fake, for the commercial.
-Bull [BLEEP].
I can say whatever I want.
[BLEEP].
Don't you touch me.
-It's OK.
Hey, it's OK.
-You touch those rats, they just--
OK.
All right.
-You OK?
-Yep.
Gotta make sure you have the right tools-- and oh no!
No, no, Phillip!
Don't wait.
Pick up the phone, and call Mortmer Exterminators today.
And you'll be extremely-- that's a [BLEEP]
rat.
That's a real rat!
Call the exterminator!
I don't like their little fingers!
It's coming this way.
Phillip, get it!
Oh Phil!
Grab that gun off the shelf.
I'm gonna shoot you, you ***.
Oh, I'm gonna--
[GUNSHOT]
-No, no, no!
I [BLEEP]
my pants.
Take me to the hospital.
It [BLEEP]
bit me.
I'm gonna [BLEEP]
die.
Tell my son that I'm dyin'.
[MUSIC - GREGORY BROTHERS]
BETH HOYT: That was some nice singing, getting you in the
mood for the iBBQ.
Look you guys, it's Max Silvestri.
MAX SILVESTRI: Hi.
Thanks for having me, Beth.
BETH HOYT: Thank you for coming.
MAX SILVESTRI: Happy barbecue.
BETH HOYT: Happy barbecue.
So Max is a comedian, a writer, and our
resident food expert.
So we thought it'd be great to have you here and start making
the food for our barbecue.
So today, we are going to make--
MAX SILVESTRI: Deviled eggs.
BETH HOYT: Ice cream sundaes.
MAX SILVESTRI: What?
BETH HOYT: I-- you know--
MAX SILVESTRI: You said, like, make a cold thing
to go with the meat.
BETH HOYT: I totally-- you said deviled eggs.
We were on the phone.
I just wasn't listening.
And I thought I should ask, what did you say?
And instead I just assumed it was sundaes.
MAX SILVESTRI: I mean that's a weird assumption.
BETH HOYT: But oh, I have my stuff, and you have yours.
I just thought--
well, I have the toppings, and you have this.
Let's just make deviled egg sundaes.
MAX SILVESTRI: That sounds like a food.
BETH HOYT: We're going to make that.
MAX SILVESTRI: So I mean, we have hard boiled eggs here.
BETH HOYT: Sure, that's the first ingredient for the--
MAX SILVESTRI: The first thing, eggs.
They're not deviled something else.
So this bag is filled with yolk, mayonnaise, and mustard,
which is a fun bag.
BETH HOYT: Gosh, if I could choose from any of these
things here, that would be the last--
MAX SILVESTRI: There's also sweet pickle relish in there.
BETH HOYT: Oh good.
Oh.
MAX SILVESTRI: The secret ingredient
is chopped up pickle.
BETH HOYT: That makes it even less enticing, actually.
MAX SILVESTRI: So we're just going to cut up the--
BETH HOYT: Ooh.
MAX SILVESTRI: I know.
It's very fancy.
BETH HOYT: Cut that little.
MAX SILVESTRI: So we can just pipe in the--
BETH HOYT: That's the trick.
So it is like frosting.
So if you tell yourself--
MAX SILVESTRI: It's a lot like frosting.
BETH HOYT: Oh my god, that is disgusting.
MAX SILVESTRI: I mean, most desserts
have egg in them anyway.
Look at that.
BETH HOYT: Well, let's make this look a
little prettier, nicer.
Let's just put an Oreo on that one.
MAX SILVESTRI: Oh god.
BETH HOYT: I've got some Reese's Pieces.
You got a little *** of-- what's in--
MAX SILVESTRI: I mean, sweet savory is kind of all
the rage right now.
BETH HOYT: What's in there?
What's in this disgusting--
in this bag of delicious creamy egg filling?
What's in there?
MAX SILVESTRI: It's egg.
The main ingredient is definitely the egg.
BETH HOYT: The yolk from the egg.
MAX SILVESTRI: Yep.
And mayonnaise and mustard and pickle relish.
BETH HOYT: Mayonnaise, mustard, egg yolk.
I mean, all of those ingredients individually could
be good on a--
MAX SILVESTRI: Do you ever watch that show, Diners,
Drive-Ins, and Dives, with Guy Fieri.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, with Guy Fieri.
MAX SILVESTRI: So I watch that kind of a lot.
And I didn't realize that of all the crazy food he eats, he
won't eat eggs.
And if he sees eggs around, he kind of flips out and is like,
I need to leave.
I can't believe you have eggs here.
And so I went to Google, like, is that a thing about him?
And I Googled Guy Fieri hates--
and then it auto completed eggs, gays, and Jews.
BETH HOYT: Oh!
MAX SILVESTRI: Those are the three things people like--
eggs first.
Like, he definitely hates eggs more than gays or Jews.
BETH HOYT: Oh gosh.
MAX SILVESTRI: I mean, I don't know that he hates any of them
for real, but people on Google--
BETH HOYT: But on Google they say that.
You can help me with these toppings here.
Oh, so Max writes for eater.com.
And you do all the Top Chef recaps and stuff.
MAX SILVESTRI: I do, I like watching and making fun.
BETH HOYT: So are you actually a foodie?
MAX SILVESTRI: I like food that I can't eat, that I can
only watch on TV.
BETH HOYT: Are you actually a foodie?
Or do you like just watching food?
MAX SILVESTRI: I mean, look at this.
Clearly, I'm a bit of a food head.
BETH HOYT: Obviously.
Yeah, that's good.
MAX SILVESTRI: Yeah, no, I love cooking.
I love eating.
I mean I feel like most people like eating.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
What do you think are the summer trendy foods?
MAX SILVESTRI: Sweet savory.
You know, like--
BETH HOYT: Sweets, like what we're doing right here?
MAX SILVESTRI: Deviled eggs with maraschino cherries.
BETH HOYT: We're starting a trend.
MAX SILVESTRI: Like the best of both worlds, the two worlds
being the world of eggs and the worlds of Reese's Pieces.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
Is bacon still a--
MAX SILVESTRI: I think bacon's over.
BETH HOYT: I feel always super cool.
It's done?
MAX SILVESTRI: Yeah.
I think bacon is at that stage where now there's going to be
like, bacon Ritz crackers.
You know?
Like it's mainstream enough that people want bacon in
their, their Wheatables.
BETH HOYT: Are Ritz crackers done?
MAX SILVESTRI: No, no.
I just mean that's the bottom-- is like flavors move.
They're trendy to--
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
This'll make it pretty.
MAX SILVESTRI: Oh, cinnamon.
Yeah, that's great.
BETH HOYT: Let's do this.
MAX SILVESTRI: Oh, that's the perfect amount.
BETH HOYT: I feel like we have all this extra topping.
Yeah.
OK, wait.
MAX SILVESTRI: Pickles.
Pickles are going to be big this year.
BETH HOYT: Look at how much extra stuff.
MAX SILVESTRI: Make your own pickles.
Put carrots with vinegar.
BETH HOYT: We have all this.
I think also just mainly these need it just there like that.
MAX SILVESTRI: Oh, there's syrup.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
They want us to wrap, but we just have a few more
toppings to put on.
MAX SILVESTRI: And that's like a dipping thing.
You can put the eggs in the middle.
BETH HOYT: I think we did a great job.
And the last thing is just a cherry on top.
Yes.
Yeah, let's make sure we get rid of that.
Get that out there.
I think we're ready.
So we're going to serve this up for everyone at the party
later, for Gabe and Grace.
MAX SILVESTRI: What a treat.
BETH HOYT: They, you know, they wanted us to pick a
special one to give to them.
But they're all pretty--
MAX SILVESTRI: Make sure to serve these hot.
BETH HOYT: Pretty even.
MAX SILVESTRI: So if you leave them out in the sun, they
should almost burn your mouth.
BETH HOYT: I love when deviled eggs get that coating.
OK, so thank you for being here.
MAX SILVESTRI: Thanks for having me, Beth.
BETH HOYT: We're going to have you back in a few minutes,
with everybody at the party.
We're going to be back in a second with Gabe Delahaye.
But first, you know when you go to a party and you have
some drinks and--
well, sometimes people go to parties, have some drinks, and
*** talking happens a little bit?
MAX SILVESTRI: Oh, yeah.
BETH HOYT: So basically, I want you guys to check out
some *** My Damn Channel says.
-What's your favorite cuss word?
FEMALE SPEAKER: Well, ff--
[PUNCH]
-I'm so sorry.
-We are not interested.
-Yucky yucky yuck.
-Bake your cookie.
-No, no, no.
Oh.
-Oh my god.
-Let me explain.
-It's my channel.
BETH HOYT: We're back.
Oh, hey look, it's Gabe Delahaye.
Gabe's a comedian and a writer.
And he runs a totally wonderful website, Videogum.
Thank you for being here.
GABE DELAHAYE: Thanks for having me.
BETH HOYT: You're welcome.
GABE DELAHAYE: Thank you so much.
BETH HOYT: No, thank you so much.
GABE DELAHAYE: Thank you.
How much time do we have?
We can just keep doing this all day.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, exactly.
This is all--
GABE DELAHAYE: Thank you so much for, seriously.
BETH HOYT: Thank you so much.
GABE DELAHAYE: Thank you so much.
It's such an honor.
BETH HOYT: No.
You're welcome.
It is an honor.
GABE DELAHAYE: It's such a pleasure to be here.
BETH HOYT: Thank you, though.
GABE DELAHAYE: Are there any eggs left?
Or did you guys eat them all during that video?
BETH HOYT: Oh no, we've got some.
OK.
So Gabe, it's officially barbecuing season.
That officially happened.
It's still unofficially summer, as we all know.
But along with barbecue comes lots of easy-breezy pop
culture talk.
You're our pop culture expert.
You are.
You are.
GABE DELAHAYE: Very strong language.
BETH HOYT: And you know, we just want some talking points
for when you're at the barbecue and you need to get
around talking about the summer's
TV and movie releases.
GABE DELAHAYE: Yeah.
Right.
BETH HOYT: Also, just while we're doing this, we're just
going to do some face paint, just to get us
ready for the party.
GABE DELAHAYE: No, no.
That seems totally normal.
It seems like a very normal thing to do.
BETH HOYT: All of you guys, I'm with you.
Anyone who has OCD about this and there not being a green
circle around this, I am aware.
I'm also dealing with it.
All right.
So I'm just going to do you first.
Let's talk about TV first.
What, what are you super excited about?
Are you so excited for--
GABE DELAHAYE: Wipeout?
Were you going to say Wipeout?
BETH HOYT: You know, I was going to say True Blood.
But let's talk about Wipeout.
GABE DELAHAYE: You want to say--
BETH HOYT: How does that feel?
Is that cold?
GABE DELAHAYE: It feels great.
Just come in out of the heat and just have someone paint
your face while you talk about one of the best shows on TV,
True Blood.
BETH HOYT: That's what we do here.
GABE DELAHAYE: Do you like that show?
BETH HOYT: I love it.
How do you feel?
GABE DELAHAYE: Uh, I hate--
well, I--
BETH HOYT: Give it to me.
Give it to me.
GABE DELAHAYE: I hate it.
I hate that show.
BETH HOYT: You hate it.
GABE DELAHAYE: Yeah.
But millions of people--
it's a very popular show.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, it obviously is.
GABE DELAHAYE: I'm in the wrong.
BETH HOYT: Well, I really like to see Alexander Skarsgard's--
can I put it on your beard?
GABE DELAHAYE: Yeah, no.
I'll just cut my head off after the show.
It's fine.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
So that was a yes for-- oh, no.
GABE DELAHAYE: It's fine.
You just-- just keep going.
I just wanna make sure--
BETH HOYT: We're just going to ignore it.
I'm just going to buy you a new shirt.
GABE DELAHAYE: I just want to make sure
that we get this right.
BETH HOYT: We're gonna get My Damn Channel to
buy you a new shirt.
GABE DELAHAYE: I just want to make sure
that we get this right.
BETH HOYT: So anyway, so we're talking about Alexander
Skarsgard taking his shirt off.
And that's basically what True Blood's about?
Is that right?
GABE DELAHAYE: I think that's mostly right.
He plays one of the--
BETH HOYT: This is so dangerous.
GABE DELAHAYE: --oldest people without a shirt.
BETH HOYT: Just get in real close.
GABE DELAHAYE: Yeah.
And then--
BETH HOYT: Oldest people without a shirt?
GABE DELAHAYE: Yeah, he's very old and very shirtless.
Those are the two main things you need to
know about that show.
BETH HOYT: I'm almost done here.
GABE DELAHAYE: Take your time.
Take your time.
BETH HOYT: I have two more very crucial--
I have a goal.
GABE DELAHAYE: What are you painting on my face?
BETH HOYT: I have a goal.
We're getting there.
GABE DELAHAYE: OK.
BETH HOYT: So, this is really fun for you.
Are you glad you came here today?
GABE DELAHAYE: Mm-hmm.
BETH HOYT: So tell us about Wipeout.
Let's talk about what you want to talk
about, which is Wipeout.
GABE DELAHAYE: Wipeout is--
BETH HOYT: It is so fun.
GABE DELAHAYE: --about these shape-shifting monsters--
BETH HOYT: As we all know.
GABE DELAHAYE: --who have to complete an obstacle course.
BETH HOYT: OK, last thing.
I don't have red.
Here, tell me if this is red.
This is it.
GABE DELAHAYE: OK.
I'm actually excited.
There is good TV that's coming out.
BETH HOYT: Which is what?
GABE DELAHAYE: Like Louie's coming out.
Breaking Bad is coming back.
Those are good things.
And then you watch Wipeout.
And then you watch True Blood, I guess.
BETH HOYT: I don't even know how to deal with Breaking Bad
coming out.
I'm really excited about that.
OK, so you can do my face now.
Yeah, just put it all over my shirt.
GABE DELAHAYE: My turn.
It's my turn.
BETH HOYT: And, let's talk about summer movies.
What do you think everyone's going to be
talking about this summer?
It can be for better or for worse.
GABE DELAHAYE: Well, it's going to be hard for any movie
to really get through all the chatter about
John Carter from Mars.
That's all that anyone really wants to talk about.
BETH HOYT: The one that came out already.
GABE DELAHAYE: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: With the Friday Night Lights guy.
GABE DELAHAYE: It's just doing gangbusters.
It's just doing gangbusters.
Everyone loves it.
It's turning--
BETH HOYT: Did anyone ever see that?
GABE DELAHAYE: You can't wash this off until
Halloween, by the way.
You have to keep this on.
That's in my contract for doing the show.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
You can take yours off as soon as the movie comes out that it
is in reference to, which is--
GABE DELAHAYE: Tyler Perry?
BETH HOYT: No, you're Abe Lincoln, a vampire killer.
GABE DELAHAYE: Oh, sure.
Sure.
BETH HOYT: That's what you are.
You just need a hat.
I couldn't paint on the hat.
GABE DELAHAYE: Yeah.
I understand.
Summer movies.
BETH HOYT: Abe Lincoln.
GABE DELAHAYE: Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted.
A lot of people are going to be talking
about that at the barbecues.
BETH HOYT: Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
This does feel good and cold on my face.
GABE DELAHAYE: I feel like it helps your concentration.
Like, it's easy to talk about some of the most popular
topics of the day when this is happening.
BETH HOYT: Well, this is why it's good.
Because there will be distractions
at the summer barbecues.
GABE DELAHAYE: You look great, too.
This is great.
BETH HOYT: --which is being intoxicated or whatever.
So we're proposing challenges now.
GABE DELAHAYE: They suggested that I paint you
to look like a cat.
But I don't know what cats look like, clearly.
So we're just going to do the best we can.
BETH HOYT: Are we there?
GABE DELAHAYE: Yep.
Cat.
BETH HOYT: We've got all of our talking points--
oh, that is good.
I think that's flattering.
Great.
How do you feel?
GABE DELAHAYE: You look great.
BETH HOYT: So do you.
GABE DELAHAYE: Thanks so much.
Thanks for having me, by the way.
BETH HOYT: Oh, you're not going anywhere.
But also, what's one thing you can say if you're at a party,
and everyone knows about pop culture, and
you don't know anything.
What's one thing you can just throw out there?
GABE DELAHAYE: You can just talk about Dame Jeremy Renner
as the new Jason Bourne.
Everyone's so excited about it.
Matt Damon is out.
BETH HOYT: I'm going to practice this.
GABE DELAHAYE: He's out.
BETH HOYT: Dame--
Dame Jason--
Dame Jeremy Renner.
GABE DELAHAYE: Dame Jason Bourne as Jeremy Renner in
Madagascar 3.
BETH HOYT: In Madagascar 3.
GABE DELAHAYE: Europe's Most Wanted.
BETH HOYT: Europe's Most Wanted.
GABE DELAHAYE: Summer barbecue.
And everyone will be like, this is the funnest barbecue.
We are just having the best conversation.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
So you just drop it on the conversation, leave, and then
they're off.
GABE DELAHAYE: You're smart, and this conversation's good.
And we look great.
And we're eating delicious eggs.
And we're just having such a good barbecue.
BETH HOYT: You're right, OK.
GABE DELAHAYE: And I can't wait for it to be summer.
BETH HOYT: You guys, don't worry.
I'm going to buy him a new shirt.
But thank you.
And we're all ready for our small talk on this internet
barbecue, which is happening.
And the pig roast is coming up.
Thank you, Gabe.
We're going to be back in a couple of minutes with you,
for the party.
Up next, our own Daily Grace will be here to
help with the libations.
But before that, we've got My Damn Channel
vlogger Shannon Coffey.
Her vlog is called Coffey Chat.
It's awesome.
And we've got a recent episode called "Shannon Goes Outside."
Check it out.
-Coffey Chat!
I'm Shannon Coffey.
This is Coffey Chat.
We're chatting.
Uh oh.
I forgot to bring coffee.
I think it's time that I make myself a latte.
I'm a girl who's making coffee.
I'm gonna make myself some coffee.
I'm gonna make myself an iced latte.
That's what's gonna happen.
I love coffee.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Mew.
Geez, someone's trying to steal the show.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
So I'm really excited because it's getting a lot warmer
around here.
See you later, winter, because it's time for spring, which I
like to call baby summer.
And I think it's time for me to get outside and not be
stuck in my apartment anymore.
Because my apartment's not a beach.
I wish it was a beach.
We could have a beach party 24/7.
[SINGING]
I'm a scat man!
I'm gonna go outside.
This is what I look like outside,
standing next to a mailbox.
Say something.
This is what I look like outside next to a tree.
This is what I look like crossing the street.
Stop sign!
Stop.
Hammer time.
This is me in a hard hat area.
This is me squatting near the trash.
Another man's garbage could be another person's treasure.
This is garbage.
And those are just a few of the fake things I do outside.
That wraps up Coffey Chat.
I'm the scat man!
BETH HOYT: Hey, we're back.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah!
BETH HOYT: Yes, we're back.
Guess who's back.
Eminem fans, you got it?
You hate me.
Anyway, whatever, it's Daily Grace.
DAILY GRACE: Hi!
BETH HOYT: Yay!
DAILY GRACE: Thanks for having me, Beth.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, thanks for coming.
DAILY GRACE: I like the tablescape.
BETH HOYT: I know.
We're keeping the wood protected.
DAILY GRACE: The only thing you need at a barbecue is just
slices of watermelon.
BETH HOYT: Yep.
Yep.
Yeah.
All right.
We have got this.
This is calling out our name here.
DAILY GRACE: Yes.
I am going to teach you guys how to make some special
summer drinks that you can bring to any barbecue.
And the most important thing about making drinks for a
barbecue is that you want a good quantity.
It's quantity not quality, really, when it comes to
summer barbecues.
You don't want to be the girl that brings liquor and then it
runs out, and you have to go to a liquor
store and pick up more.
Everyone will hate you.
It'd be really bad.
So today I'm going to teach you how to make a lot of drink
at one time.
BETH HOYT: Right.
So no one knows, and no one sees you refilling it.
DAILY GRACE: No.
The first thing we need is ice for our pitcher.
BETH HOYT: Whoa, muscles!
Bring that up.
DAILY GRACE: We have some ice there.
Next, what you want to do-- it's a very strategic system
for measuring.
BETH HOYT: Very strategic system.
DAILY GRACE: You want to really make sure that you
measure out your pours.
OK?
BETH HOYT: It's true.
I was a bartender.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah.
So you take one shot glass, and then--
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
You just pour that right--
you just take it.
And then you just dump the bottle.
DAILY GRACE: That's for you!
BETH HOYT: Yep.
That's just going in there like that.
DAILY GRACE: Whoa, there's your ***.
Can you actually help me out?
Get the other one?
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
We've got another bottle of-- so we're just
going to dump that?
DAILY GRACE: Dump that right in there.
BETH HOYT: Yep, so the way you measure it--
DAILY GRACE: This is, USA!
USA!
USA!
But we're not lushes here, clearly.
BETH HOYT: Right.
Also, Mexico.
DAILY GRACE: Mexico!
Um, so we're going to add some mixers into this guy.
We have some Jose Cuervo margarita mix.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
Oh because this is also 3/4 tequila, too.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah.
We should be sponsored by Jose Cuervo.
Hashtag.
Someone hashtag that and send it to us.
BETH HOYT: Hashtag-- someone do that for us.
Also, this is an unbreakable bottle.
So this is safe for a barbecue party.
DAILY GRACE: For things like that.
You can be real dramatic.
Flare.
Bartenders are all about flare, if you don't know.
She's been a bartender before, clearly.
Then you really want to get in there and mix it all up.
BETH HOYT: Just do it with your hands.
DAILY GRACE: There's a lot of weird things
floating in this, actually.
BETH HOYT: What is that black stuff?
DAILY GRACE: I don't know.
Sometimes you get presents.
BETH HOYT: Doesn't matter.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah.
It's karma.
OK.
BETH HOYT: I think we could just use this here.
DAILY GRACE: And then you want some limes.
BETH HOYT: Oh, sure.
DAILY GRACE: Because limes are really what--
BETH HOYT: Makes it really fresh.
DAILY GRACE: Makes a drink fresh.
There we go.
Perfect.
Just like that.
And we're just about done.
So that means you're going to take a straw in your-- did you
have a straw?
BETH HOYT: I had one.
DAILY GRACE: Oh, it fell on the ground.
So another thing about barbecues is like--
BETH HOYT: There's already stuff in here.
DAILY GRACE: --when it falls on the ground, you just pick
it up and put it in your mouth.
That's how you do it.
Take your glass, throw that away, and put your straw in--
BETH HOYT: 'Cause this is plastic, too.
DAILY GRACE: And get down to business.
Mm.
BETH HOYT: Oh yeah.
DAILY GRACE: This is really--
it tastes--
BETH HOYT: We needed salt.
We need salt for the rim.
DAILY GRACE: Oh!
I'm an idiot.
BETH HOYT: A margarita needs to have salt on the rim.
DAILY GRACE: A margarita needs salt.
So we're going to take our lime.
Can you take this lime, Beth?
BETH HOYT: I can.
DAILY GRACE: And we're just going to juice our rim to make
it ready for the salt.
BETH HOYT: So then the salt sticks.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah.
Guys, duh.
Mega duh.
Then you take your salt.
BETH HOYT: Oh God.
OK.
DAILY GRACE: And you put it right around the rim.
BETH HOYT: My superstitious self is cringing.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah!
BETH HOYT: Grace, you have to throw some salt over your-- oh
my goodness, this is just so much bad luck is happening for
you right now.
DAILY GRACE: Oh no!
BETH HOYT: You need to just take some of this and put it
over your shoulder.
DAILY GRACE: Slam.
I did it.
BETH HOYT: Am I safe if she did that?
If I watched her spill all this salt?
DAILY GRACE: Put it over your shoulder.
BETH HOYT: I'm gonna-- but then what if it's bad luck
because I reversed it?
Let's just drink.
DAILY GRACE: Everyone that has OCD that's watching this show
has tuned out.
Sorry, y'all.
But there you have it.
A bucket of ***.
BETH HOYT: This looks great.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah.
Get in there.
BETH HOYT: We're all going to share this.
DAILY GRACE: Yep.
BETH HOYT: That's OK.
DAILY GRACE: Mmm.
BETH HOYT: It's like--
we must just tackle this.
It looks like one big drink.
But basically, it's four bottles.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah.
I'm from New Jersey.
This is a New Jersey delicacy.
You find a tub, and you fill it with ***.
BETH HOYT: This is what's going to happen to me later
on, is that I'm going to forget that I have this.
I'm going to drink, and then I'm gonna be--
you guys are going to see me in New York City.
I'm going to have this on my face.
DAILY GRACE: Best iBarbecue ever!
BETH HOYT: All right.
You guys, we're two minutes away from the pig roast and
the Internet barbecue.
Can you handle it?
Are you ready?
You have 120 seconds to get ready.
To help you get ready, it's the John Friedman Internet
Program with "Another 127 Hours."
That's what it's called.
It's just two minutes.
We'll be right back.
THEME SONG: It's the John Friedman Internet Program on
your world wide web.
[DIAL UP RINGING]
MALE SPEAKER (OFFSCREEN): Aw, no!
My other arm!
THEME SONG: It's the John Friedman Internet Program on
your world wide web.
BETH HOYT: Now this record was just set on your website.
And we're going to attempt to break it.
Can you explain the record while I get ready?
MALE SPEAKER: Absolutely.
We just got an amazing submission to RecordSetter
this week for the most table tennis balls fired out of
one's mouth in 30 seconds.
A boy named Gray Jones did a spectacular job and has set
the mark at 33.
So we're going to need to see 34 for this one
to be a world record.
BETH HOYT: I'm really nervous for this.
MALE SPEAKER: The bar is high.
The bar is high.
BETH HOYT: I mean, there's a lot riding on it.
Also, I'm already embarrassed.
But I'm going to win.
I'm going to look stupid.
I'm going to win this stupid thing.
MALE SPEAKER: We'll see.
We need to see 34 in 30 seconds.
BETH HOYT: I know, I know.
MALE SPEAKER: You let me know when you're ready, and I will
count you down.
BETH HOYT: OK, one ball at a time, poppin' 'em out.
MALE SPEAKER: Poppin' 'em out.
You have lots.
I think we're good.
BETH HOYT: That was not good luck.
I'm not using that one again.
OK, I'm ready.
Wait, no I'm not.
Yep.
I'm ready.
MALE SPEAKER: OK.
Here we go, Beth.
On your marks, get set, go.
Time.
Oh my Gosh, Beth.
BETH HOYT: That was 50.
MALE SPEAKER: That was crazy.
We got 50.
Oh my goodness.
Extraordinarily well done.
BETH HOYT: I'm so-- ding new record.
MALE SPEAKER: Another world record.
I can't believe it.
BETH HOYT: I feel so good!
MALE SPEAKER: That's one of the best things I've ever seen
in my life.
That was so awesome.
BETH HOYT: You guys, we did it.
Also, Posha, Posha5?
DAILY GRACE: Posha5--
BETH HOYT: We're live.
DAILY GRACE: She Tweeted that she didn't think we were live.
How dare she, or he?
BETH HOYT: All right.
You guys.
We're all here.
We're here for the barbecue.
DAILY GRACE: Yay!
BETH HOYT: And we're going to start off with the pig roast.
OK, so first up, here's our pig!
I'm gonna be the first one to kick it off.
Pig, you're so fat.
You're so fat.
Charlotte's Web read, go on a diet.
DAILY GRACE: Slam.
BETH HOYT: Gabe.
Gabe.
GABE DELAHAYE: That pig is so dumb, I heard it has a
drinking problem and is bad at its job.
BETH HOYT: Ohh!
Zing!
Max.
MAX SILVESTRI: Look how ugly that pig is.
I wouldn't *** that pig with its own ***.
DAILY GRACE: Ohh!
BETH HOYT: Grace.
DAILY GRACE: That pig is so delicious.
I want seconds.
BETH HOYT: Boom!
Pig roasted!
DAILY GRACE: Gotcha.
BETH HOYT: Ooh.
Are we OK?
Let's drink.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: Yay.
Cheers, guys.
DAILY GRACE: I made this for you guys.
MAX SILVESTRI: Thank you.
DAILY GRACE: You're welcome.
BETH HOYT: OK, they put the crazies on the
same side over here.
OK, anyway.
Well, we're going to drink and answer your Tweets and your
comments and stuff.
So what happens is, whoever the question is addressed to--
GABE DELAHAYE: I'm hot.
It's hot in here.
DAILY GRACE: You're sweating through your shirt.
MAX SILVESTRI: Sometimes my fingernails feel too tight.
BETH HOYT: I just want to get them off.
I just want them to come off.
MAX SILVESTRI: Man, it's like I'm wearing little gloves on
the end of each finger.
GABE DELAHAYE: Does the trick, Max.
Does the trick.
BETH HOYT: We're OK.
Listen, we want to get to your Tweets and comments.
If it's addressed at you, then you answer it.
And then you take a drink.
And if it's an all, we all drink.
We get it.
Let's go.
Let's see.
First, we have a Tweet.
And it is from PeterPan808.
This is Grace. "Dear Grace, how can you go to a BBQ and be
a vegetarian or whatever you are?"
DAILY GRACE: It's very simple.
You just have to put up a thick skin and
endure lots of eye rolls.
'Cause it's hard to be a vegetarian at barbecues.
BETH HOYT: Do you bring your own veggie materials?
DAILY GRACE: No, I don't, which makes it even worse.
BETH HOYT: Just eat buns with ketchup?
DAILY GRACE: I just eat buns.
Just buns.
MAX SILVESTRI: At barbecues, thick
skins are called cracklins.
BETH HOYT: Zing.
Boom.
Drink, Grace.
Tumblr question.
Its from Smokybanjo.
"Let's ask them about the flavor--
mint."
GABE DELAHAYE: Good question.
MAX SILVESTRI: Wow.
DAILY GRACE: This is an age old question.
BETH HOYT: Seriously.
I mean, what do you guys think?
They know how I feel about mint.
MAX SILVESTRI: How about it?
GABE DELAHAYE: I don't talk about it in public.
MAX SILVESTRI: In eggs?
Or in drinks?
BETH HOYT: Oh, it's probably topical.
It's probably about the eggs.
You guys are all dying to--
MAX SILVESTRI: Is everything when you're talking about
toppings topical?
BETH HOYT: Yes.
On today's show.
MAX SILVESTRI: Fresh mint.
Clap it.
Clap it before you put it on things.
BETH HOYT: We addressed that.
We totally addressed that.
MAX SILVESTRI: Here's the deal.
It releases the flavor.
You clap mint.
BETH HOYT: Is that true?
MAX SILVESTRI: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: You're the foodie expert.
DAILY GRACE: What?
BETH HOYT: Drink, everybody.
All right.
Tumblr question.
This is from--
MAX SILVESTRI: Got a good bite of salt that time.
DAILY GRACE: Yeah!
BETH HOYT: J or I-M-R. "How do you know if you've used too
much lighter fluid on the grill?"
MAX SILVESTRI: No such thing.
BETH HOYT: Quick tip.
You lose your eyebrows.
DAILY GRACE: But now he's got two sets of them, so he can
lose a pair.
GABE DELAHAYE: Yeah.
MAX SILVESTRI: Your emergency face.
GABE DELAHAYE: Like a barbecue set?
MAX SILVESTRI: Really nice.
The big problem with emergency face is if they're not close
by, you forget to use them.
But yours is right on your real face.
GABE DELAHAYE: And you're not supposed to put on your own
emergency face.
You always have someone else put it on for you.
BETH HOYT: Is your emergency face, by the way, burning your
skin a little bit?
GABE DELAHAYE: Like a lot of it.
BETH HOYT: So OK, that's great.
Feelin' good.
Uh, Tumblr question.
Philburmac.
"Embarrassing BBQ stories?"
GABE DELAHAYE: Well, I got my period the
first time at a barbecue.
So embarrassing.
MAX SILVESTRI: And the hamburger was a hamburger.
And you were wearing a white hamburger bun.
GABE DELAHAYE: Gosh.
That tops it.
BETH HOYT: Premium toppings.
Ding ding ding ding, toppings.
Everyone drink.
GABE DELAHAYE: Ugh, it's just--
MAX SILVESTRI: I think I hit a salt vein.
I'm going to move my straw to somewhere.
DAILY GRACE: It's a surprise every time.
Every time.
BETH HOYT: We have a comment from YouTube now.
Um, BruceMOble.
"Boo, new Jason Bourne?" I can't talk.
There's so much salt.
"Is there a demand for another Jason Bourne
movie?" Like, is there?
MAX SILVESTRI: Yes.
GABE DELAHAYE: Yes.
MAX SILVESTRI: The answer's yes.
GABE DELAHAYE: What are you talking about?
Boo you.
What are you talking about?
MAX SILVESTRI: YouTube, ban their account.
Ban it.
They're gone.
DAILY GRACE: Flag it as spam.
MAX SILVESTRI: Take down their page.
GABE DELAHAYE: Shut it down.
Throw their computer in the bathtub.
BETH HOYT: Oh, we all have to drink.
But it's like punishing us, but just go for it.
MAX SILVESTRI: You have to either drink or eat
a whole egg, so--
BETH HOYT: Oh, yep.
DAILY GRACE: And it's the liquor.
BETH HOYT: Tumblr question.
GABE DELAHAYE: It's just the perfect balance.
BETH HOYT: Saengking.
"What's a good way of dealing with the heat?" You know what
is a good way?
MAX SILVESTRI: A zone defense, for my
basketball heads out there.
DAILY GRACE: Dwyane Wade!
GABE DELAHAYE: That was good.
MAX SILVESTRI: Touchdown.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
Um, zing.
We have another Twitter question comment.
It's from 3177@H. "Start dancing with everybody!
Everyone."
DAILY GRACE: Oh, we got music.
BETH HOYT: You guys, before we run out of time--
yeah, we did that.
Check.
GABE DELAHAYE: Yeah, we did that.
BETH HOYT: Check, drink.
All right.
This is our delicious barbecue.
And before we run out of time--
DAILY GRACE: This has been a crazy barbecue.
A crazy iBBQ.
BETH HOYT: It's a salt shot.
I want those of you watching this who are not subscribers
to My Damn Channel's YouTube channel, first of all, if
you're not a subscriber, what's going on?
How did things get so messed up?
Don't you know if you subscribe on YouTube, you'll
never miss a show.
Can you believe--
DAILY GRACE: Gross.
BETH HOYT: Can you believe that people don't
subscribe to this?
DAILY GRACE: How dare they?
BETH HOYT: Anyway, I'm not going to bribe you or anything
to subscribe.
But I will say this, I will personally come to each new
subscriber's home and give them a non-*** massage.
I care about you having relaxed and balanced
musculature.
And I also care about you subscribing to
our wonderful show.
So do that.
Yay.
OK.
This barbecue is going to continue.
But the Internet portion has to end because that's all the
time we have.
My skin is burning off.
Probably Gabe's too.
So thanks so much to guests, Max and Gabe and Grace.
Do you guys want to talk about what you have coming up?
Grace is hosting the show tomorrow.
What's going to happen then?
DAILY GRACE: I'll be here tomorrow.
I'll be here tomorrow at 4:00 PM with Michelle Vargas.
And we'll be giving you advice on anything you
didn't want advice on.
BETH HOYT: Ooh, good.
What's up for you, Max?
MAX SILVESTRI: If you live in New York, I host a show called
Big Terrific every Wednesday in Brooklyn.
And next week's our four-year anniversary.
June 6 with Gabe Liedman.
It's going to be very fun.
You should come.
DAILY GRACE: Congratulations.
MAX SILVESTRI: Kristen Schaal will be there.
BETH HOYT: Awesome.
Gabe.
You had a great show last night, by the way.
GABE DELAHAYE: Thank you so much.
BETH HOYT: One year anniversary of
his show, Mr. Coconuts.
Sorry, I'll let you talk.
GABE DELAHAYE: My one year anniversary of Mr. Coconuts.
We have another show coming up, June 19 that'll be very
fun at Union Hall and Park Slope.
No, it's good.
Just drink more.
I think you have to drink more, and then it gets good.
MAX SILVESTRI: Right, right.
It's like that song, the first drink is the toughest.
BETH HOYT: Yes.
You know when you look at the packet of something, you look
at the sodium, and you're like, mmm?
EVERYONE: Yeah.
DAILY GRACE: Not this.
BETH HOYT: Well, yeah.
I mean, there's no point in not saying we're doing that.
MAX SILVESTRI: What's the nutch info on this, you know?
BETH HOYT: You guys.
Cool.
I'll be back Friday with the weekly wrap up.
And next week, the unofficial summer continues
with more fun stuff.
OK, so no more stalling.
Now it's time to break from the delicious cocktail and get
into our delicious food.
So everyone pick an egg.
And um, dip it in the middle.
Because we have the dipping sauce in the middle.
DAILY GRACE: Oh, mine's falling apart.
MAX SILVESTRI: The dipping sauce pairs really
well with the egg.
BETH HOYT: Make sure you dip that in there.
EVERYONE: Cheers.
BETH HOYT: Two, three.
Yeah!
Mmm.