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bjbj Now, as we established, if you re like me and you don t want to or can t find one
of these pre-packaged dental dams which look something like this There is your pre-packaged dental dam, and
let s spread it out there, would look something like this. However, if this isn t an option
for you, there are plenty of things that you can do, and that s where we can get really
creative as trans people. So, if the traditional dental dam is not something you want to work
with, you can do one of several things. The first thing I m going to mention is a really
neat little trick. You ve probably seen it before, but it never hurts to show you again.
There is, for trans men who haven t had a phalloplasty, if you ve only if you haven
t been on any kind of HRT, or if you ve only been taking T, or you ve had a meta, and you
re a little too small to fit the traditional external ***, what you can do is you can
take a glove like this. Now, be aware of latex allergies. A lot of people have this issue.
If that s something that s an issue, what you can do is you can find gloves that come
in polyurethane or nitrile or vinyl or something else besides that latex or another kind of
rubber material. So when you take this, if you want to make a really good trans man ***,
what you ll do is you ll take blunted scissors (you don t want anything too terribly sharp)
and you re going to cut off the fingers like so, which will leave it looking something
like this, and the next step is you want to cut up along the side where the pinky finger
was like this, which is going to leave you with something looking like this. Now, here
s what s really cool about this. Trans men, if you ve been on testosterone for a few years,
oftentimes your *** can be about the size of a thumb, and that s what makes this so
useful. The thumb portion creates a *** that fits your *** in a pretty good way,
and in addition to that, the rest of the glove provides you with a really nice, really good
cover of a dental dam, so it s kind of like a two in one deal here. Really good idea.
I definitely recommend this, and gloves are fairly cheap to come by, so this would be
a lot better than actually trying to fool with a dental dam. You can also, if you don
t want to do that, you can take a traditional external ***. First thing is first, you
always want to check your expiration date, so this is February 2016, so we re good. You
want to push the *** to the side so that you don t tear it. You want to open it up
this way. Always check to make sure you ve got the right side like this. This is what
a traditional male *** or an external *** would look like. You can unroll this. You
can cut off the top. There we go. Or you could AND you can cut the bottom. And then you want
to make sure that you cut down the side and be careful not to penetrate any other part
of the ***. And then what you ve done is you ve ended up with another dental dam. Now,
another thing you can do, if in the case of trans women, for example if you don t want
to do anything that I just showed you there, another option is to take the internal ***.
Again, let s check our expiration date. 2016, so we re also good here. Push the *** down
and open up the package. And here you have an internal ***. Now, you ll notice this
has a soft outer ring and a hard inner ring. What you can do for a makeshift dental dam
for trans women is that you can take out the hard ring, and you can slide this over the
*** and it will provide you with a nice, loose but well-fitting in terms of surface
area, a good barrier. Anything that I just showed you there, anything that is being used
as a dental dam, can also be used for the purposes of ***. So again, there s lots
of things that you can do and you don t have to be restricted to any one kind of material.
I don t have one sitting next to me, but another thing you re going to want is to have a Sharpie
because say, for instance, we re getting hot and heavy and we re using this fancy dental
dam, what s going to happen is if we get really excited and this slips around, it s possible
that I might confuse which side is which. Now, it s a barrier, so we want to make sure
it s being used correctly. You want to make sure you re only using the side that s been
in contact with your mouth and not the side that s been in contact with your partner s
body. What you re going to want to do is take a Sharpie and just write on one side or another
and see which way is which so that you don t make that mistake, you don t get them confused.
Now, if you want a *** that has spermicide in it, you need to be really careful. I would
avoid nonoxyl-9 in particular. The reason for that is not only because there s some
evidence that this might cause issues with latex and other rubbers, but it s also a known
irritant and it can cause micro-tears for some people, which will leave you open to
more infection and that s something we really want to avoid. In addition to this, if you
don t want to do the internal *** or the glove or the external *** or the dental
dam, then what do you do? You can have a really cheap alternative and that is to use Saranwrap.
Now, I don t often recommend this, and the reason that I don t is that you have to be
very careful about what kind of Saranwrap you re using. It has to be NON-MICROWAVABLE
only, and the reason for that is need to consider what microwavable is actually intended for.
It s intended for the venting of steam, for things to go in and out, so there will be
pores in that material that will be naked to the visible eye and er, will not be visible
to the naked eye, excuse me! So you need to make sure that you re using something that
will actually be a reliable barrier and that s what the non-microwavable is for. Now, you
need to be able to find that, and I think that s why I really just don t recommend this
is because I don t often see non-microwavable Saranwrap. If, however, you can find it, go
for it. It is certainly much cheaper than any of these materials, except for maybe the
gloves might be comparable. All right, so, in terms of bodily differences, this is sort
of related to what I was talking about earlier in the presentation, but it s also good to
keep in mind as far as the issue of lube is concerned. In trans women who ve had SRS,
there might be some natural lubrication from the urethral tissue and from the Cowper s
and prostate glands. Usually, however, vaginas that have been surgically reconfigured are
not self-lubricating. Also in trans men who are on testosterone, this can sometimes cause
frontal dryness, which makes tearing more likely. Guys, if you are having sex, especially
if it s very rough, and you start to bleed afterwards, don t freak out right away. It
might not be spotting. It could just be this tearing issue, and there are things you can
do to help prevent that, including lube and sometimes you might get topical estrogen creams
to help with that issue. Your dryness can also increase after you ve had an oophorectomy,
so if you go in for that kind of a surgical option, that s something you want to be aware
of first. Now, what s the solution? Lube, lube, lube, lube, lube! I really cannot stress
this enough, and you want to have a good variety. You want to make sure that there s several
different kinds in your kit. You want to use water- or silicone-based lubes for latex and
other rubbers, which is what most condoms are made out of. Do not use lambskin condoms!
They will not protect you against STI s, particularly ***, and they won t really protect you from
pregnancy either. You want to use materials that are more reliable and more durable. For
anything that is an oil-based lube, you want to keep this away from latex and other rubbers
because the oils can weaken them and cause them to break. However, oil-based lubes can
be used with polyurethane, nitrile, or vinyl. They can be used with condoms or gloves that
are made out of those materials. Now, be aware that oils are not recommended for vaginal
use. They can be difficult to clean and they can irritate to some people. Just as a general
rule, be aware of what material everything is made of and just take some basic, some
necessary precautions. With your water-based lube, especially if it s this flavored lube
like what I have here, it often has glycerin, and again, as with the flavored ***, this
can cause or aggravate a yeast infection. So you want to be careful about what you re
using. Of course, non-flavored lube for more rigorous activity, but a good flavored lube
is always something nice to have in the case of oral sex. Now, water-based lubes can be
kind of irritating because they will dry out pretty quickly, so what you can do is just
have a little bit of water next to you, and whenever they start to dry out, apply the
water to the lube and it will reactivate it, and then that s problem solved, taken care
of. Now, why do you need the lube? It s to stop breakage. You don t want any of these
barriers to be compromised because that would kind of defeat the purpose of why we re here,
and also the thing about lube is that it increases sensation for everybody. It makes the experience
more pleasant, it makes things go more smoothly, it s just in general a really good idea to
have some of this on hand, and particularly a lot of it if your partner is trans because
there might be an extra need for it. Now, as far as this internal ***, I m actually
going to say a little bit about this here. The thing about an internal *** is that
they do have some downsides and some upsides. So let s address those downsides first. What
is it that people normally don t like about these? The main thing is that these are expensive
to produce, package, and ship. They are also they re not really in very high demand. These
haven t been on the market for much longer than about 20 years, so oftentimes people
actually aren t aware that these exist. And since they re expensive and there s not a
very high demand for them, they re often not widely accessible. Theoretically, you re supposed
to be able to find these in your local drug store, but at least where I live in the South,
you can t really do that. If they re in your local drug store, go for it, you re totally
lucky. For the rest of us, if you want to find these, I would recommend going to Total
Access Group dot com. They re really awesome, especially if you want to buy them in bulk
and for a good price, that s a good way to do it. You can also buy these directly from
the manufacturer, although I ll warn you that that is more expensive to do. If you want
them for free or very, very low cost, you can go to Planned Parenthood, or your local
clinic or health department should have them. Now, you ll also see that it s a fairly unusual
shape whenever you compare it to the traditional external ***. This often makes people very
resistant to trying this, and you ll notice that the shape also, it can make people get
a little fed up when they try to put it in. Now, I will throw out my two cents on this.
It s totally worth it, I promise you. It is kind of annoying if you re not accustomed
to it, but it is very much worth the effort to actually get the hang of this because there
are so many upsides to using this, which I ll get to in just a moment. The last thing
really about this that turns people off to them is the fact that the material that they
re made of, which is usually polyurethane, or in the newer version of the internal ***
they re nitrile, they re very squeaky. And a lot of times people don t like that because
they can be kind of loud. As I say, if you re not doing it loudly, you re not doing it
right, so there is that to consider, but if you have an issue with the sound, it s pretty
easily taken care of. You just apply lots of extra lube and that should take care of
your problem. You ll also notice that the outer ring is designed to sit like this, so
it is very noticeable, it s visible, and that often makes people shy, it makes them self-conscious
and they don t really want to use it. Now, what are the upsides to this though? Well,
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