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\f0\fs24 \cf0 Well, I thought for a long time I was going to start this video series\
\ About dealing with Lupus, primarily\
\ And I quite thought that it would be a little
bit different -\ \
That I would be in better health and ummm, just looking a little better -\
\ I kind of didn't want to have my hair messy,
or no makeup on or anything\ \
But it occurred to me today that the person who would be watching this \
\ Who would be needing this \
\ Wouldn't really care if I showed up without
my makeup on or my hair not combed.\ \
So far this morning I've been able to brush my teeth\
\ And wash my face and just go to the restroom\
\ But that's about it so far. But pain has stepped
in -\ \
And I've had to take a break from the other things maybe I'd like to do\
\ I think that in spite of all that, that it's
a good morning because \ \
A couple months back I couldn't have done even those few things - at all.\
\ I couldn't brush my own teeth and go to the
bathroom and wash my face. \ \
I couldn't stand up that long. And today I can -\
\ And that's been a long time coming. \
\ So I just wanted to put it out there that
if you hang on for a better day\ \
A better day can, and usually does come.\ \
And in my case, last year was quite difficult with the Lupus\
\ I wound up having, ITP a blood disorder\
\ Where you loose your platelets and become
quite exhausted\ \
And it can be fatal and in my case it nearly was.\
\ But through some divine intervention\
\ I made it to the hospital on time to receive
several transfusions\ \
For several days and then had my spleen removed\ \
Which did help reverse that situation.\ \
Also last year I had a little cat I loved very much\
\ and unfortunately I got very sick from him
I got nicked, and I got flesh eating bacteria\ \
And the recovery from that - the surgery actually \
\ And recovery from that was very difficult
Very long, and as you can see continues to this day \
\ Because I am barely 44 years old now\
\ Well not barely, but. anyways I am 44 years
old \ \
But sometimes I feel like I am 94 \ \
Because I am so exhausted all the time.\ \
And anyways, but part of that is you know trying your best every day\
\ To do what you can to keep good spirits\
\ To keep trying to improve your situation\
\ And to not lose hope.\
\ And that's why I am putting this out there\
\ For anyone, who - maybe some days\
\ I had some days where all I could do was just
You'd think turning on the t.v. wouldn't be a way to have hope \
\ But in my case it was because physically I
couldn't stand up\ \
Or do anything else, so I tried to find ways to distract myself\
\ To keep good spirits. To make myself feel
better.\ \
So that I would be able to hang on for another day.\
\ And so if I knew that there was someone out
there like myself \ \
Who had made it through -\ \
And hopefully in dramatic fashion - had made it back from poor health\
\ To good health not just better health but
to GOOD health\ \
That would have made me very excited and hopeful\ \
And I would like to see if I can do that -\ \
Because a couple years ago I did do that.\ \
I had terrible health when I moved from NYC to Utah\
\ and through a long combination of things \
\ I was able to improve my health.\
\ I had started the Anti-Inflammation Diet\
\ I took it very seriously. I didn't cheat on
it or anything\ \
I didn't make excuses, I just did what I had to do\
\ To see if it would work, and at the end\
\ long story short, I got off thirteen different
medications\ \
I got off chemotherapy\ \
I started walking - at the beginning it was no more than\
\ No more than 50 feet at a time - with an escort\
\ They had to send somebody with me at this
health center\ \
They had to send somebody with me to make sure I didn't tip over.\
\ But a little over four months later\
\ There's a place called Angel's Landing in
Zion Park \ \
You can google that maybe -\ \
And I climbed that for the first time, with my son\
\ We made it to Scout's Lookout the first time\
\ And I would have done the whole thing but
he was a little concerned about it \ \
Because - You'll know why when you take a look at - it but anyway\
\ I did it again a couple weeks later after
he went home.\ \
I did it again and did the whole thing.\ \
And then did it again with another friend who was inspired by my having done so\
\ Cause she was quite overweight and hadn't
done it in many, many years \ \
Since the year I was born she said.\ \
But anyway - I just wanted to finally stop procrastinating\
\ You'll learn that about me over time that
I am a procrastinator\ \
I've BEEN a procrastinator in the past \ \
And I am trying to improve certain things about myself\
\ And that's a commitment I am trying to make
with this video series\ \
Is to be there for whoever may be watching\ \
And to try to show them that it does get better.\ \
Because it does and not always in the way you think it does -\
\ Because some days maybe my health isn't wonderful
right now \ \
But there have been other steps I've taken in the past several months\
\ To not shut myself away - \
\ When they say "housebound" for the past year
I mean housebound - I really had not seen anything \
\ But four walls and my little dog for months
on end\ \
And it was just terrible.\ \
And so now at the very least (which is a lot) at the very least, \
\ I have CNA that comes every day for an hour
to two hours\ \
And helps me with some chores around the house \
\ And keeps me great company - I am very grateful.\
\ I have another one who comes the other two
days a week\ \
One comes five days one comes two days\ \
And the other one has become like family to me, really quite like family\
\ More than.... the BEST family to me.... anyway\
\ So I just wanted to finally put this out there\
\ So I would stop making excuses that I would
do it tomorrow\ \
When my hair is better and so anyways\ \
I hope that this message gets to the person who needs it.\
\ And I'll be back real soon. Okay.\
}