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>> RYAN: Welcome back, Internet people. My name is Ryan and today we are playing Shadow
Man for the PC.
We just got one govi in the... What's this place called? The Undercity.
This place is exceptionally depressing. It is far more depressing than any other level
in the entire game
and apparently there's going to be a dragon later, so watch out for that dragon.
Shadow Man can't stop talking about it.
Oh no.
Is there no way back up?
I want to go back.
Oh no!
What am I to do?
Do I jump up...
this way?
No?
No, there must be a way back up.
Why would they build this with no way back up?
This is just cruel and unusual punishment.
Can I climb on those spinities?
I might be able to climb on the spinities.
I don't think I can climb on the spinities. I'm just going to have to take the long way.
OK so we're back on this second spinny room and I just noticed...
I figure we're going to go down this path before we return and explore...
the rest of the path that I was just in.
This might just lead to a third room.
The third room in that hallway.
But maybe not.
You never know with this game.
This game can pull all sorts of surprises.
Or push them.
Hi.
I'm not afraid of you in the slightest so I just jumped down beside you.
Didn't get hit.
What do you think about that, Mr. Bluh?
Hello, how's it going?
I'm shooting you. Right in the face.
You have a gun too but you don't seem to know how to use yours at all.
Got a few things.
What's really annoying is that in the background of this there's a...
In the background of this, the background music, there's the same noise the dark souls
make when you approach them
so I just constantly think there's dark souls around
when in reality there's not.
OK, so...
let's take the path that was first presented to me
which was this one here
and I am rewarded for my choice of path with nothing interesting.
Something bloody?
Something bloody, something borrowed, something blue?
Marriages in Deadside.
Only $40 because they're kind of gross.
It's like Las Vegas
except these guys run all the McDonaldses.
Oh look, another Dark Soul.
This one doesn't seem to be very well hidden at all.
Just sort of out and about for anyone to get hold of it.
I wonder, should I jump down here?
Eh, might as well.
Couldn't hurt.
Oh, what the hell is this?
I don't want to be here.
This looks like ridiculousness.
I'm going to see if I can...
Oh no, I don't think I can jump that high again.
Oh well.
I guess I'm doing whatever they want me to do in here.
Just go on here I guess.
Someone saw me.
Oh god.
Don't shoot at me, I'm only Shadow Man!
I'm not very powerful at all.
In fact, I am quite the opposite.
I am not powerful. I am scared of you.
Please, please... Oh, I'm not fooling anybody.
They must have heard of my exploits like how I killed that trueform without using the shield
thing because I forgot I had a shield thing
and about how I killed 80 bajillion of these guys.
These guys must not be very smart if they've heard I killed 80 bajillion of them and yet
they still try to attack me.
I could see if maybe they were attacking me and at least changing their tactics a little
bit but no. These are the exact same tactics.
Oh, wait a minute. Is this just...?
I think this might just be...
Yeah, that's just this room- Oh wait, no.
New enemies. OK.
Hi.
Are you going to shoot at me or are you just going to stand there and be lazy?
You are a layabout.
That's what this guy is.
He is not earning his paycheque.
Not one bit.
OK, so...
for some reason I thought that was a traincar.
I don't have the greatest brain you know.
It makes silly assumptions sometimes
like that being a traincar. That doesn't make any sense. Why would there be a traincar here?
I don't even know what this Undercity is for. Is it just an Undercity for the sake of an
Undercity because that is not a good reason to have an Undercity.
Oh, I'm back here. I did not want to be back here.
Oh well.
Alrighty, so we're back in this room here...
Just hop up here and I guess...
I'm not quite sure how I want to get down to that bottom platform.
Success, OK.
So, don't want to go on this one. Want to go on that other one over there.
So we're back in here.
Look at how quickly that moved though.
It was almost as if someone was chopping up video for the convenience.
So I guess we'll go this way.
Oh.
Hooray!
Time to collect an extractorator.
Hello. You are guarding an Extractor.
What a prestigious thing
for a lowly and useless man such as yourself.
Lots of guys, lots of guys everywhere, oh no!
What am I to do?
***. Lots and lots of ***.
That's what I'll do.
Shadow Man likes that you know.
He likes lots and lots of ***.
You know, I don't know why Deadside is such an awful place.
If that's where you go when you die...
I don't know, if I had to go somewhere when I died
I'd make it a nice place even if it was kind of a hell type thing, right?
You know, put up some curtains or something.
Shadow Man just makes it seem so bleak.
>> SHADOW MAN: Now that could be useful. >> RYAN: That most definitely could be useful.
Maybe you should pick it up, Shadow Man, instead of just staring at it.
OK, so I've got three Retractors...
and there are noises occuring in the background.
And some barrels. I love barrels.
I love them to death.
And one more barrel.
OK, so... got the retractor.
Let's see what else, pray tell, I can collect in this area before I move along home.
Oh god.
Hi.
How are you doing?
I'm doing just well. Thanks for asking.
These people are so incredibly rude.
It is unfathomable. Unconscionable even.
I don't want to caption that. I have no idea how to spell "unconscionable."
[Got it on my first try. *** yeah.]
OK. So is that it for this room?
Looks like it is.
Yeah, it looks like it is. I think that's just about everything.
Well then, where is the third...?
Where is the third dark soul then?
I thought I had walked down all the passageways.
Hm, let me just check something really quickly here.
OK, so I had a look and apparently I'm missing something
in that room with the rope there there's another passageway there.
So if I can remember how to get there...
I don't think I can remember how to get there. This is going to be a problem.
I go... is it this way? Nope, that's just a wall.
[laughs] Is it this way?
Nope, that's just a crevice.
Uh oh. Oh god.
I'm pretty sure this is just where I came from.
How about I just bring the video back once I've found it.
Alright, I found it after much labourious running around.
So apparently I climb this rope.
Now, once I'm on the top of this rope...
Oh, I go up- Oh, I see.
That's quite obvious. OK.
Can I make...?
It doesn't look like I can make that jump, but...
I guess it doesn't hurt to try. Bluuh!
Ah.
OK, you guys can't tell me that it didn't look like I could make that jump-
Or, that it did look like I could make that jump. That looked way too far.
Oh god.
Ohh, go in the right direction.
Oh, hello.
I am your worst nightmare.
Actually, these guys' worst nightmare would probably be
literacy and competency would be these guys' greatest fear.
OK, so another room like this.
Got some doors to unlock...
Hi.
Oh, OK. Well, I don't like you either.
I'm sorry
but I just like the awful screaming you do when I kill you
so maybe if you didn't scream in such a sweet way then I wouldn't want to kill you all the
time.
So I'm going to guess that I hop down here?
I really hope that this is what I was meant to do because otherwise I'm going to have
to come back here in a very inconvenient way. I'll have to go all over the place.
This game doesn't make any sense.
How did that guy get up here?
There's literally no easy way for him to get up here.
Did you see that? He was like 500 pounds. He couldn't jump.
He doesn't seem that spry.
Eh, well, for all I know he is really spry.
What's in here? Something that requires lightment.
Delicious, delicious lightment.
Or just falling down. [laughs]
Oh, oh, fell down again.
I put that on my resume: "Really, really good at falling off of things."
I guess I better term would be...
"skilled..."
you know, blank area tester
or something.
I don't know what I'm talking about.
Oh god.
Oh god!
Oh god, I know exactly what's in that giant thing.
Christ.
Christ almighty, and my computer doesn't like it either.
Before I proceed any further I think I'm going to make that a video.
We'll be back in a little while, Internet people. Thanks for watching.