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ROB MCCLENDON: ACROSS THE COUNTRY THE MOVIE BULLY IS DRAWING CRITICAL PRAISE
FOR ITS STARK DEPICTION OF BULLYING AND IT'S AFTERMATH.
IT'S A CONTROVERSIAL DOCUMENTARY THAT TELLS THE STORY OF TY FIELD SMALLEY,
AN 11-YEAR-OLD OKLAHOMA BOY, WHO AFTER BEING PICKED ON IN SCHOOL TOOK A
22-CALIBER GUN, PUT IT TO HIS HEAD, AND KILLED HIMSELF; BUT, THE STORY
DOES NOT END THERE.
JOINING ME NOW IS TY'S FATHER, KIRK SMALLEY.
NOW REALLY, I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START, EXCEPT TO SAY I'M SORRY AND IT SEEMS
ALMOST UNFATHOMABLE TO ME; TAKE ME BACK TO THAT TIME IN MAY OF 2010.
KIRK SMALLEY: ROB, TY HAD BEEN PICKED ON FOR OVER TWO YEARS, PRETTY MUCH BY
THE SAME KID.
HE, THERE WAS A GROUP OF KIDS THAT WERE INVOLVED, IN PARTICULAR ONE.
AND, YOU KNOW, HIS MOMMA WORKED AT THE SCHOOL AND SHE WAS UP THERE ALMOST
EVERY DAY COMPLAINING, TRYING TO GET IT TO STOP, MAKING PHONE CALLS.
AND ON THAT PARTICULAR DAY I GUESS TY HAD FINALLY HAD ENOUGH; HE WAS SITTING IN
THE GYM WITH HIS BEST FRIEND, THEY WERE WAITING ON CLASS TO START, AND
THIS KID THAT HAD BEEN PICKING ON HIM CAME UP AND STARTED IN AGAIN.
AND TY RETALIATED, HE FOUGHT BACK.
MOST OF THE TIME, IT'S OFTEN THE CASE, THAT THE SECOND GUY IS ALWAYS THE
ONE THAT GETS CAUGHT.
YOU KNOW, IT HAPPENS IN SPORTS ALL THE TIME, THE DISTURBANCE DRAWS A
REFEREE OR THE TEACHER'S EYE AND THEY LOOK OVER AND SEE THAT SECOND GUY TAKE A
SWING EVERYTIME, YOU KNOW.
AND HE WAS CAUGHT, HE WAS SUSPENDED FOR THREE DAYS AND HIS MOMMA GOT CALLED
AND SHE WENT AND PICKED HIM UP AND TOOK HIM HOME.
THEY WERE SHORTHANDED THAT DAY AT WORK AND LAURA HAD TO GO BACK; AND SHE TOLD
TY TO DO HIS HOMEWORK, TOLD HIM TO DO HIS CHORES, AND TOLD HIM WE'D TALK
ABOUT IT WHEN WE GOT HOME THAT EVENING.
AND SHE CAME HOME AT 2:38 PM AND SHE FOUND OUT THAT HE HADN'T DONE HIS
HOMEWORK AND CHORES; INSTEAD, HE HAD KILLED HIMSELF ON OUR BEDROOM
FLOOR AND I GOT A PHONE CALL AT 2:39 AND CALLER ID SAID IT WAS LAURA AND I
ANSWERED AND, SHE WAS SCREAMING, JUST SCREAMING.
AND I TRIED AND TRIED TO CALM HER DOWN AND GET HER TO TELL ME WHAT WAS GOING
ON AND FINALLY I HAD TO SCREAM BACK AT HER AND I TOLD HER SHE HAD TO JUST
STOP AND TELL ME WHAT WAS GOING ON AND SHE MANAGED TO SAY, HE'S DEAD; HE SHOT
HIMSELF.
AND I ASKED HER WHO?
AND SHE SAID, TY.
AND YOU KNOW, SINCE THAT DAY, LAURA AND I WE'VE, WE'VE TALKED TO FAMILIES
ALL OVER THIS WORLD WITH KIDS THAT HAVE DONE THIS SAME THING; YOU KNOW, I'VE
GOT A LIST OF OVER 800 BABIES THAT HAVE KILLED THEMSELVES BECAUSE OF
BEING BULLIED.
THE MONTH OF FEBRUARY OF THIS YEAR, WE LOST 9 KIDS TO SUICIDE IN OKLAHOMA; 7
OF 'EM FOR SURE BECAUSE OF BEING BULLIED, AND WE'RE NOT SURE ABOUT THE OTHER 2.
WE LOST ANOTHER LITTLE BOY 5 DAYS AGO IN OKLAHOMA CITY AT MOUNT SAINT MARY'S
FROM BEING BULLIED, AND WE GOTTA MAKE IT STOP!
ROB: I AGREE AND I THINK THAT'S WHERE THE STORY WITH YOUR FAMILY REALLY
TAKES SUCH A POSITIVE TURN, IS WHAT'S HAPPENED SINCE TY'S DEATH.
IF YOU WOULD, TELL ME ABOUT STAND FOR THE SILENT.
KIRK: STAND FOR THE SILENT WAS STARTED BY A GROUP OF OSU OKC UPWARD BOUND
STUDENTS FROM THREE HIGH SCHOOLS IN THE OKLAHOMA CITY AREA.
THEY HEARD ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED TO TY AND AS A SUMMER PROJECT THEY
DECIDED THAT THEY WERE GONNA TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE, THEY WERE
GONNA, GONNA MAKE THIS STOP.
I GOT IN TOUCH WITH THEIR DIRECTOR, FRANCIE MOSS, WE SCHEDULED FOR ME TO GO AND
TALK TO THESE KIDS AND IT JUST KINDA GREW FROM THERE.
WE PLANNED A RALLY AT ONE OF THE HIGH SCHOOLS, WESTERN HEIGHTS, THAT WAS
ON AUGUST 17TH, WE HELD OUR FIRST RALLY; CNN ACTUALLY ATTENDED THAT,
UH, CAROL COSTELLO, UH, THEY FILMED IT.
AND THEN WE PLANNED A RALLY ON THE OKLAHOMA STATE CAPITOL SOUTH LAWN,
AND THAT RALLY SNOWBALLED; IT WENT GLOBAL.
WE HAD 23 RALLIES IN THE UNITED STATES ACROSS THE NATION, IN 19 DIFFERENT
STATES; WE HAD 7 INTERNATIONAL RALLIES AT THE SAME TIME, WE HAD FOUR
IN AUSTRALIA, ONE IN IRELAND, ONE IN SPAIN, ONE IN SOUTH AFRICA, ONE IN
HAITI, COUPLE UP IN CANADA.
YOU KNOW, WE WENT GLOBAL WITH THE MESSAGE AND SINCE THEN IT'S JUST, THESE KIDS
HAVE SPREAD IT AT EVERY SCHOOL THAT WE'VE GONE TO.
TO DATE, LAURA AND I HAVE BEEN TO OVER 440 SCHOOLS, WE'VE TALKED TO RIGHT AT
590,000 KIDS, AND THEY KEEP SPREADING IT.
ROB: SO, OVER A HALF A MILLION KIDS KIRK: YEAH.
THAT'S IN PERSON THAT WE'VE PRESENTED TO AND THESE KIDS SPREAD IT TO
PEOPLE VIA THE INTERNET AND VIA SOCIAL MEDIA LIKE YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE.
I HAVE NO DOUBT THAT WE REACHED OVER TWO MILLION PEOPLE WITH OUR MESSAGE
JUST FROM THESE KIDS.
ROB: GIVE ME SOME INSIGHT OF WHAT YOU FIND WHEN YOU GO INTO THESE SCHOOLS.
THESE ARE NOT ISOLATED INSTANCES, ARE THEY?
KIRK: OH NO; WE'VE BEEN NATIONWIDE, WE'RE GOING TO AUSTRALIA THIS SUMMER TO
GET IT GOING OVER THERE.
WE'VE BEEN TO THE LITTLE, TINY, TINY SCHOOLS IN RURAL OKLAHOMA AND RURAL
NEBRASKA AND IOWA, YOU KNOW, WE'VE BEEN TO ONE OUT, THAT WAS IN A TIN
BUILDING IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMEBODY'S COW PASTURE AND THEY GOT THIS MANY KIDS
AND THEY'VE GOT BULLYING.
AND WE'VE BEEN TO LA WHERE THE TOUGH KIDS, GANG MEMBERS AND STUFF, IN NEW
YORK WHERE THE TOUGH KIDS, INTERCITY SCHOOLS, AND THEY'VE GOT BULLYING.
THIS IS NOT ISOLATED, IT HAPPENS EVERYWHERE IT HAPPENS ALL OVER SOCIETY
NOT JUST IN SCHOOLS.
AND YOU KNOW, MOST OF THE TIME YOU WALK INTO A SCHOOL AND YOU GET READY
FOR A PRESENTATION, AND THE KIDS START COMIN' IN AND THEY'RE CUTTIN' UP AND
BEING KIDS, YOU KNOW , AND THEN THEY HEAR THE ANNOUNCEMENT WELL, THIS IS
AN ASSEMBLY ABOUT BULLYING AND YOU CAN SEE 'EM GOING OH GOSH, HERE WE GO AGAIN,
ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE DON'T DO THIS, BE NICE TO EACH OTHER, PLAY WELL, AND TWO
MINUTES INTO OUR PRESENTATION YOU CAN HAVE AN AUDITORIUM FULL OF
2,200 KIDS AND YOU CAN HEAR A PIN DROP FOR THE NEXT HOUR AND FIFTEEN
MINUTES; LITERALLY, THEY ARE SILENT, THEY HEAR WHAT IS GOING ON, THEY HEAR
TY'S STORY, THEY HEAR THE STORY OF SEVERAL OTHER CHILDREN THAT WE HONOR
DURING OUR PRESENTATION AND TELL ABOUT AND THEY SEE SIMILARITIES IN WHAT
IS GOING ON IN THEIR HALLWAYS AND THEY REALIZE THAT THEY CAN MAKE A
DIFFERENCE.
AND OUR MAIN MESSAGE IS TO ALL OF 'EM, IS THAT I AM SOMEBODY AND THAT'S WHAT
WE TRY TO GET OUT THERE, THAT THEY BELONG, THEY HAVE A RIGHT TO BE WHO
THEY ARE, THAT THEY HAVE A RIGHT TO BE HERE, AND THAT WE LOVE EVERYONE OF THEM
JUST LIKE THEY ARE, JUST FOR EXACTLY WHO THEY ARE, NO MATTER WHO THEY ARE.
ROB: THANK YOU.
KIRK: YOU KEEP THAT AND WEAR IT.
ROB: I WILL, I'LL WEAR IT WITH PRIDE.
AND I WANT YOU TO TELL EVERYONE, WE TALKED ABOUT IT BEFORE YOU CAME ON,
ABOUT WHAT YOU JUST DID, IT WAS A SIGN LANGUAGE SIGN AND WHAT THAT MEANS.
KIRK: THAT IS THE AMERICAN SIGN LANGUAGE SYMBOL, IT MEANS I LOVE YOU, AND WE
TEACH THAT TO THE KIDS IN THESE PRESENTATIONS.
TO US, IT DOESN'T JUST MEAN I LOVE YOU, IT MEANS I SUPPORT YOU AND I GOT
YOUR BACK.
AND THAT'S ACTUALLY ON OUR PLEDGE CARD AND IT SAYS I AM SOMEBODY ON IT.
WE LEAVE PLEDGE CARDS AT EVERY SCHOOL WE GO TO BY THE THOUSANDS.
RIGHT NOW WE'RE GOING THROUGH ABOUT 30,000 PLEDGE CARDS A MONTH.
WE GIVE 'EM TO THE SCHOOLS BY THE THOUSANDS FREE OF CHARGE.
WE LEAVE 'EM POSTERS WITH OUR PLEDGE ON IT.
THEY SIGN THE PLEDGE CARD, THEY DATE IT, AND THEN THE KIDS KEEP THAT CARD TO
REMIND THEM DAILY OF THEIR PROMISE.
WE'VE GOT KIDS THAT HAVE SEVERAL OF THESE PLEDGE CARDS TAPED ON THEIR, ON
THEIR AUTOMOBILES, ON THEIR DASHBOARDS.
WE'VE GOT KIDS THAT HAVE, THEY RACE HOT RODS AND THEY'VE GOT 'EN ON THE
NATIONAL HOT ROD RACING ASSOCIATION'S NATIONAL CHAMPION, YOU KNOW, OUR
LOGO AND OUR PLEDGE, THEY SPREAD THIS MESSAGE SO MANY WAYS.
ROB: I WOULD HAVE TO AGREE WITH YOU, THE MESSAGE IS BEING SPREAD A LOT FURTHER
AND A LOT LOUDER THAN I'VE EVER SEEN IT SPREAD.
DO YOU BELIEVE WE COULD BE AT A TIPPING POINT IN CHANGING ATTITUDES?
KIRK: I DO THINK WE ARE.
I THINK SOCIETY IS STARTING TO FINALLY REALIZE THAT WE CAN'T
CONTINUE LIKE THIS, WE CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS ANY LONGER.
YOU KNOW, ONE OF THE PROBLEMS I'VE HAD AND WE'VE HAD, WE CAN GET
THESE KIDS INVOLVED AND THEY GET HEAVILY INVOLVED; THEY'RE SPREADING THIS AND
THEY'RE FIGHTING FOR IT SO MUCH.
ONE OF THE PROBLEMS WE HAVE IS GETTING THE ADULTS TO TAKE IT SERIOUS, YOU
KNOW, TOO MANY TIMES WE'VE HEARD KIDS WILL BE KIDS, BOYS WILL BE BOYS.
BULLYING IS A RITE OF CHILDHOOD PASSAGE; IT'S SOMETHING ALL KIDS GOTTA
GO THROUGH.
WHY?
WHY DO WE HAVE TO DO THAT?
WHY DO THEY HAVE TO GO THROUGH IT?
IT'S THAT WAY, BECAUSE WE, AS A SOCIETY, ARE ALLOWING IT TO BE THAT WAY, ROB;
YOU KNOW, WE DON'T TAKE IT SERIOUS.
IF I WALK UP TO YOU ON THE STREET AND I SLAP YOU BESIDE THE HEAD, THAT'S
ASSAULT, AND I CAN GET ARRESTED FOR THAT; BUT YET, IT HAPPENS IN OUR
HALLWAYS ALL DAY, EVERY DAY.
AND THAT'S KIDS WILL BE KIDS?
NO!
ROB: IS THERE A PROFILE OF A BULLY?
KIRK: NO, NOT AT ALL; I'VE BEEN A BULLY, YOU'VE BEEN A BULLY.
ROB: UNFORTUNATELY, PROBABLY SO.
KIRK: IT HAPPENS; EVERYONE HAS EXHIBITED BULLYING BEHAVIOR.
YOU KNOW, WHAT YOU SAY TO ME OR CALL ME TODAY, MIGHT, MIGHT ROLL RIGHT
OFF MY BACK, BUT YET TOMORROW, IT MAY CRUSH ME DEPENDING ON WHAT I'D BEEN
THROUGH IN THAT DAY'S TIME.
OR YOU MAY SAY SOMETHING TO ME AND IT DOESN'T MEAN NOTHING, BUT YET YOU TURN
AROUND AND SAY IT TO LAURA AND IT RUINS HER WORLD.
ANYONE CAN EXHIBIT BULLYING BEHAVIOR.
AT THE SAME TIME THOUGH, THERE ARE FAMILIES THAT, YOU KNOW, HAVE A HISTORY
OF BULLYING.
IF MOMMA'S A BULLY AND DADDY'S A BULLY, THE KIDS PROBABLY GOING TO BE BULLY
AND GRANDMA AND GRANDPA ARE PROBABLY BULLIES.
AND IF WE CAN BREAK THAT CYCLE FOR ONE BULLY AND THEY RAISE THEIR KIDS,
THINK OF HOW PEOPLE ACROSS TIME THAT THAT'S GOING TO AFFECT AND CHANGE, YOU
KNOW.
AND IT'S NOT JUST THE BULLIES THEMSELVES, IT'S THEIR VICTIMS; YOU KNOW,
KIDS THAT ARE BEING BULLIES ARE A LOT OF TIMES ARE BEING ABUSED OR
VICTIMIZED AT HOME, YOU KNOW.
AND THEN THEY GO OUT AND THEY PASS THAT PAIN ON, YOU KNOW.
IT'S YOU KICK ME DOWN AT WORK AND I GO HOME AND I KICK MY DOG BEHAVIOR, YOU
KNOW.
ROB: YOU TOLD ME BEFORE WE CAME OUT INTO THE STUDIO THAT SOMETIMES YOU REPLAY
WHEN TY WAS ALIVE, WHEN YOU'D GET UPSET ON THE ROADWAYS AND HOW THAT
COULD HAVE AFFECTED HIM.
KIRK: I USE THAT AS AN INSTANCE IN A LOT OF THE EVENING PRESENTATIONS AND
IN-SERVICE TRAININGS THAT WE DO FOR SCHOOLS AS AN EXAMPLE.
ROB: AND THESE ARE TO THE ADULTS?
KIRK: YES SIR.
YOU KNOW, I WAS A CONSTRUCTION WORKER AND HAD A PRETTY COLORFUL
VOCABULARY AND I WAS PROBABLY ONE OF THE WORLD'S WORST AT ROAD
RAGE.
SOME IDIOT WOULD SWING OUT IN FRONT OF ME IN TRAFFIC AND I'D LIGHT HIM UP AND,
YOU KNOW, MY BOY WAS A LOT OF TIMES SITTING BESIDE ME IN THE TRUCK SEAT WATCHING
ME BEHAVE THAT WAY.
AND, 704 DAYS AGO, I GOT A PHONE CALL AND SOMEBODY NEEDED ME AT HOME REALLY
BAD.
AND, I KNOW THAT I CUT A LOT OF PEOPLE OFF IN TRAFFIC THAT DAY BECAUSE I
MADE ABOUT AN HOUR'S DRIVE INTO ABOUT A 30-MINUTE ONE.
AND THAT IS WHERE WE HAVE TO GET IN OUR SOCIETY, ROB, WE HAVE TO GET TO THE
POINT WHERE WHEN THAT HAPPENS, AND ESPECIALLY WHEN OUR BABIES ARE
SITTING BESIDE US WATCHING US, WE DON'T LIGHT 'EM UP.
WE FIND IT IN OUR HEARTS, AND WE HAVE TO LIVE THIS, WE CAN'T JUST ACT IT, WE
HAVE TO FIND IT IN OUR HEARTS TO BE ABLE TO SAY, THAT POOR GUY MUST HAVE AN
EMERGENCY IN HIS LIFE AND SOMEBODY MUST NEED HIM SOMEWHERE REALLY BAD AND
LET'S JUST HOPE THAT EVERYTHING'S OKAY FOR HIM AND HE GETS WHERE HE'S
GOING SAFELY.
BUT THAT'S WHAT WE HAVE TO LEARN TO DO ESPECIALLY WHEN WE'RE AROUND OUR KIDS
AND TO BE ABLE TO DO THAT CONSISTENTLY, YOU HAVE TO LIVE THAT.
YOU HAVE TO MAKE THAT A BELIEF.
OUR KIDS LEARN THIS BY WATCHING US.
SOCIETY HAS CAUSED THIS, YOU KNOW, WE'VE CAUSED IT.
AND IF NOBODY ELSE WANTS TO TAKE THE BLAME, THROW IT ON ME, I DID IT; NOW
HELP ME FIX IT.
WE TELL TY'S STORY EVERY SINGLE DAY, THREE AND FOUR AND FIVE TIMES A DAY, AND
WE RELIVE THAT DAY EVERY TIME WE TELL IT.
AND, IT DOESN'T HEAL AND IT DOESN'T GET BETTER YOU KNOW, WE WERE TOLD AFTER
TY DIED BY A LOT OF PEOPLE THAT TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS.
NO, IT DOESN'T.
AND, THEY SAID HE'S IN A BETTER PLACE; BUT ROB, OUR BABY ISN'T IN OUR ARMS
WHERE HE BELONGS.
ROB: TRUE.
KIRK: AND THEY SAID THINGS LIK,E IT'LL GET BETTER AND IT'LL GET EASIER, AND
THAT'S AN OUTRIGHT LIE.
YOU KNOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WOULD GIVE IF YOU LOST A CHILD TO HAVE HIM
BACK, BUT I KNOW THAT I WOULD GIVE EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD, MY OWN LIFE
INCLUDING, IF I COULD PUT MY SON IN HIS MOMMA'S ARMS ONE TIME FOR FIVE MINUTES,
JUST ONCE AGAIN.
AND SUICIDE HAS BECOME THE SECOND LEADING CAUSE OF DEATH IN OUR YOUNG PEOPLE
IN AMERICA AGES 10 TO 24 YEARS OLD; IT'S SECOND ONLY TO CAR WRECKS.
SUICIDE, SECOND TO CAR WRECKS.
ROB: IT'S UNFATHOMABLE, IT IS.
KIRK: WE'VE GOT KIDS AS YOUNG AS SIX THAT HAVE KILLED THEIRSELVES BECAUSE
OF BEING BULLIED.
LITTLE BOY DOWN IN THE COLONY IN TEXAS WAS NINE.
HE RETALIATED AGAINST A BULLY THAT HAD BEEN PICKING ON HIM ALL YEAR
LONG, MONTANA LANTZ.
HE GOT CAUGHT BECAUSE THE SECOND GUY ALWAYS DOES.
HE WAS SITTING IN THE OFFICE WAITING ON HIS MOMMA DEBBIE AND HIS DADDY
JASON, TO COME AND PICK HIM UP AND TAKE HIM HOME AND HE ASKED IF HE COULD
GO TO THE BATHROOM.
THEY LET HIM GO IN THE NURSE'S BATHROOM, THE ONLY ONE IN SCHOOL THAT HAD A
LOCK ON THE DOOR, AND 9-YEAR-OLD MONTANA LANTZ TOOK OFF HIS OWN BELT AND
HUNG HIMSELF IN THE NURSE'S BATHROOM.
AND WE GOTTA MAKE THAT STOP!
ROB: WELL, I THINK YOU'RE WELL ON THE WAY.
HOPEFULLY, YOU'RE WELL ON THE WAY AND I KNOW, MANY PEOPLE ARE PROUD OF YOU
AND LIKE TO THINK THAT TY WOULD BE AS WELL.
KIRK: I APPRECIATE YOUR HELP.
ROB: GOOD LUCK IN YOUR WORK.
KIRK: THANK YOU.