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Welcome brothers and sisters to this week's meeting of the Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel.
A secret society dedicated to discovering, decoding, and protecting the secrets of Gravity
Falls. I am this chapters founder and duly appointed High Exhaulted Big Fish, Douglas
Mackrell. As always, if you would like to see the minutes of last week's meeting you
can click this link - right here. And now for this week's order of business: The timeline
of Gravity Falls!
One of the more interesting aspects of Gravity Falls is that within their span of 20 episodes
and a handful of shorts, Alex Hirsch and the writers of the show have woven a deep and
rich history for the town and it's cast of characters. A deep and rich history that's
a bit more convoluted due to time travel, hidden messages, and flashbacks they've shown
the audience. So in today's meeting we're going to break down the known events of Gravity
Falls, how they interconnect, and what they can tell us about the future!
Well, what better way to start, then at the beginning? Due to a time travel mix up, Dipper
and Mabel are almost eaten by a T Rex around 65 million years ago. They narrowly escaped.
Also, somewhere around the same time, a LARGE collection of dinosaurs were accidentally
trapped in solid amber within the caves beneath Gravity Falls.
In 1837, on the heels of Martin Van Buren's death, Quentin Trembley won the vote for 9th
president of the United States by winning by default. His competitors were all killed
in the tragic events of a literal landslide. The problem was he was still insane. We know
that he waged war on pancakes, appointed 6 babies to the Supreme Court, and announced
the Depancimation Proclamation forcing everyone in America to stop wearing pants. He was such
an embarrassment, he was kicked out of office.
Sometime in the early 1863's Quentin Trembley founds the town of Gravity Falls Oregon by
falling off a cliff while riding a horse backwards, and sets about creating a series of insane
laws that are still on the town charter to this very day - like the fact that people
can marry woodpeckers, that finders keepers is binding ownership, and that children can
be sent to regular adult jail. His last act in the 1800's was to encase himself in Peanut
Brittle because he believed that it had life sustaining properties.
With Quentin seemingly dead, his body - and all of the evidence of his presidency - was
entombed in a secret hidden chamber under the Gravity Falls Cemetery. All of American
history was rewritten and William Henry Harrison was elected president. During this time of
coverup and conspiracy, local nobody Nathaniel Northwest was credited with being the true
founder of Gravity Falls, and a series of complex clues were hidden around Gravity Falls
to lead people to the secret tomb.
At the same time - roughly 150 years ago - Mabel and Dipper time hopped into the covered wagon
of Fertilla and Grady Mecc. In their brief meeting, Mabel gives them an electronic calculator,
teaches them how to high five, and talks up the idea of woman suffrage. It's important
to point out that Fertilla holds a baby in her arms with a bandaid on it's face. This
would be odd on it's own, what with adhesive bandages not being invented until 1921 - but
another character also has a bandage on his face in a similar style. Old Man McGucket.
Sometime in the 1950s, Grunkle Stan was born. Throughout the 60's and early 70s he was trained
by his father to be more of a tough guy, to stick up for himself, and handle his own problems
- a lesson that has stuck with him to this very day. In a life changing moment, Stan
defended Carla McCorkle while in line for a movie, and this was the launching pad for
a long relationship between the two.
In the 1970's Grunkle Stan was a door to door vacuum salesman, and theoretically learned
how to sell junk to strangers. It was also around this time that Carla McCorkle was swayed
to the hippie scene by the music of Thistle Downe. Soon after Thistle and Carla started
dating. Stan, thinking that Thistle's music had hypnotized Carla, tried to break things
up between the two of them - and in another life changing event - drove Thistle's car
into a ravine. After that, Carla stopped talking to Stan.
During a winter storm in the late 1970s to early 1980s, Dipper and Mabel time hopped
and alerted the attention of a man in the Mystery Shack. Though this man bares a resemblance
to a young Grunkle Stan, he's believed to be Grunkle Stan's unmentioned twin brother.
Around that same time, Grunkle Stan was sentenced and imprisoned in a Colombian jail. We still
don't know why - or if he even served his whole sentence.
The next major event in Gravity Falls that occurred on a concrete date - is July 4, 1982.
We don't know anything about the events of that day just yet other than the fact that
it was cryptically circled on a calendar within the hidden office in the Mystery Shack.
On May 2nd, 1995, Ma and Pa Duskerton were killed by heart attacks given to them by the
rap music enjoyed by the 90's teens at the time.
Around 1996, Wendy Corduroy was born. We know this because of a tweet Alex made stating
that Wendy is 15 years old.
In 1997, a costume shop existed near or in the Mystery Shack - which allowed Blendin
Blandin to rent a renaissance costume from.
Between 1999 and 2000, Dipper and Mabel were born - making them 12 years old when the main
events of the show happen.
In 2002 the Mystery Shack was in full swing - and Grunkle Stan stole the cursed wax figures.
Eventually boring of them and hiding them away ten years before the events of the episode
Headhunters.
We know that the core events of the show take place over a single summer in 2012. The main
date that's disclosed during the show is that Summerween. We discover that it falls on Friday,
June 22, 2012 because of a full wall calendar that Grunkle Stan carries around for some
reason. Whether or not Summerween always lands on the 22nd or if it's locked into the second
to last Friday of June is unclear.
Pushing forward, we only know two future events. The mysterious mailbox from Dippers Guide
to the Unexplained, The Mailbox, claims that the end of the world will happen in 3012.
One thousand years into Dipper and Mabel's future. We also know that Bendin Blandin exists
in the year 207̃012 - a dystopian future where he works for the Time Anomaly Removal
Crew.
Aside from Bendin, his teammates Lolph and Dundgren, there are a few other time travelers
that awaken in different times. The dinosaurs awaken as the amber melts during the hot summer
of 2012, Quentin Trembly awakens - completely unaged and unphased over 150 years into the
future thanks to peanut brittle, and a mysterious character called the Time Baby is discovered
in a glacier in the arctic sometime in the 1800s.
It's suggested that the ice caps melt enough for the Time Baby to escape and wreak havoc
at some point. We see the Time Baby destroying a city after a misjudged time jump made by
Dipper and Mabel. Though the mysterious baby is described as "Time Devouring" by it's discoverers,
at some point it seems to become the head of the Time Anomaly Removal Crew.
Though it's impossible to know precisely what will take place in the second season and beyond
- we can be sure of more time travel and more anomalies. We can prove this because Blendin
is seen cleaning something up in the background of the final episode of the first season - Gideon
Rises.
What do you think could have been left behind here - or what could have been narrowly avoided
at this point in time? What events will we see take place in the second season. Will
the character of Gravity Falls escape the coming apocalypse? Leave your theories and
suggestions in the comments below! Now before I close todays meeting, I have one last order
of business.
The Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel's Store is now officially open! Be sure to act fast,
because my current stock on some of the items in the Official Membership Kit aren't that
deep - but I am getting more stock in very soon. Also be sure to check out all of the
listings! I tried to make things as affordable as I could so you'll find a few different
combos of items at various prices.
So click the link to check out the store! At least I hope you can click the link to
check it out. If it's not a clickable link, it's probably telling you to click the link
in the About section below. Either way - just do what that note says on the screen right
now.
Also, be sure to take this week's challenge! The Trial of the Timeline Anomalies. If you
can decode and answer all three, then you'll get your hands on my hand drawn timeline of
Gravity Falls!
With no other orders of business, I hereby call a close to this weeks meeting of the
Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel.
Next week, starting February 3rd, Disney USA will air Mabel's Guide to Life. A series of
5 shorts aired one per day. These will include: Mabel's guide to Dating, Mabel's Guide to
Stickers, Mabel's guide to Fashion, Mabel's Guide to Colors, and Mabel's guide to art.
I will analyze the shorts in two weeks.