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It has become common nowadays to prove that someone is very talented
-I made a film -Are you a director?
-Short film maker
- The last film I made was a hit. For the next picture, I'm trying for
ummm.. Ileana DíCruz - What is the name of the film? - Curd dish!!!
- Curd dish!!! What movie is that!? - Short film man U havenít seen it? Disgusting man!!
When I tell that I am a filmmaker, the first question they ask me is
Dude, u making a film? Did u write the story?
You looking for heroes? I can act as a hero
Are you making a film? Who's the heroine?
What do you get from movies? Go and do regular studies. Useless buggers!!!
Never mind! Different people have different opinions, but the correct questions they have to ask are -
Why are you making it?
What will you get?
Will you earn money from it?
Where will you release it?
Short film makers have found publicity avenues much larger than regualar films through facebook, youtube, TV channels.
They are like official sponsors, who provide us space to exhibit our films
It doesn't matter if a film is a hit or not. All it matters is the number of likes and shares it receives!
I am an eccentric director. I have pooled all eccentric guys and made an eccentric film! Watch it!!!
Cut to the next scene! Sashi follows Swathi from behind her. He looks cruel, villainous, evilish
He stops and tells ìSwathi ñ I Love You.î He requests her to forgive him.
Swathi smiles softly.
Rain starts falling.
Screen fades to black. Title appears on the screen.
This is our film! ♪♪ I am the the Greatu! Greatu! Great, great, great, greatu, greatu ♪♪
♪♪ I am the the Greatu! Greatu! Great, great, great, greatu, greatu ♪♪
- Itís amazing!!! -Itís super! A-1 class! ♪♪ I am the the Greatu! Greatu! Great, great, great, greatu, greatu ♪♪
-Nice ♪♪ I am the the Greatu! Greatu! Great, great, great, greatu, greatu ♪♪
Joseph, your friend has a camera, right? Bring that - you will be the cameraman.
-What about actors? -Yeah, we need actors, right? I published a post on facebook that we are looking for actors.
Hey, a friend of mine looks good. If you want, I will ask her for Swathi character.
You rock Divya!!!
-Hey, will you act in a short film?
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-Sorry, my boyfriend wonít accept! -Sorry, my boyfriend wonít accept!
I like to act, but my boyfriend???
I asked my boyfriend, and he said that he would kick me.
These boyfriends are fit for nothing!!! Beep, beep, beep
Oh God! Please show me one girl, just one girl who does not have a boyfriend.
Hey, she does not have a boyfriend.
-Hey Lasya, I donít know what you are going to do. You are acting in our short film. Donít ask any other questions. Shooting starts from tomorrow.
-Hey, listen to me. Recently I fell in love with a guy.
-What Lasya, you also fell for somebody?
-Anyways, I will try to act. -Please try.
-Hey Aditya, we need your home for shooting. We will finish it off soon dude. -Hey RJ. My friend agreed for Swathi character. She will come tomorrow.
Sir, there was a post for auditions.
Just one post in facebook is enough to create a swarm of small guys who want to act in small films.
Itís here. Come inside.
The scene is that a girl has cheated on you. And you went to ask her for explanation.
Shakeel, give him the script. Read the dialogues in it and tell them in a suitable style.
Why did you cheat me? What harm did I do to you? Do you think it is correct?
Hey! Stop there! Why did you cheat me? Do you think it is correct?
Why did you cheat me? What harm did I do to you?
Why did you cheat me? What hope did you do to me?
Sorry! Can I start from the beginning?
Hey you ugly creature! You daughter of a b**ch!
You promised me heaven and dumped me into hell!!! Trickster! Beep. beep. beep.
Sir, how did I tell sir? Is it okay?
Why did you cheat me? What harm did I do to you? Do you think it is correct?
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Eh! Why did you cheat me? Did you do any harm to me?
Oh, sorry, sorry!
Why did you cheat me? What harm did I to you? Do.. do you tt.. is correct?
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Do you have prior acting experience?
My friends say that I look good. Thatís why I came for auditions.
DON'T MAKE ANY SOUND! I will slit your throat! Letís meet at any center in this Rayalaseema ñ Proddhutur, Chittor, Kadapa, Kurnool!
Bring your arms and vassals all together! I will come ALL ALONE. And kill all of you without sweating. Will you fight with me?
-Sashi, you are doing well
-RJ, how much is the budget?
Boss, I want acting, not imitation. I hope you will do well. I am giving you a chance to act.
Yea, letís do it.
Ok, tomorrow the shoot begins at 9 am. So all of us should be at the location by 8 am.
-What, nobody turned up yet!? -As if you are on time.
- RJ, I will be there in 10 mins
-Is Lasya coming? -She said she will confirm in another 10 minutes.
-She hasnít confirmed yet!? -Almost confirm. She has to ask her boyfriend for permission.
-RJ, I am near the circle. -Take right, the first white building is Karteeka Nilayam. We are on the terrace, come here.
-If Lasya doesnít come today, we canít shoot. Once call her and confirm her availability.
-Why are you so late? -Sorry RJ! I was buying all these items in the morning. Hence the delay.
-Haven't I asked you to buy them yesterday itself? Anyways, where is Shakeel?
-I thought he was here already. -No.
-Did Joseph come? -He did not come too. Cameraman isnít there! Heroine isnít there!
-Sashi came. -Okay, clear up this place.
-Divya, give the script papers to me. -RJ, this shirt is not washed. Is it ok?
-We shall shoot the scene with Swathi later. For now, we shall shoot this scene.
-What man!? IS IT 9 AM NOW!?
-RJ, thereís a bad news! -What?
-Joseph canít come today to shoot. -Why?
-He took his girlfriend to church.
-GIRLFRIEND, MY FOOT! MY ANKLE! MY TOE! FROM WHERE WILL WE GET THE CAMERA NOW?
-You donít worry. He gave the camera to me.
-What!? This one?
-What are you thinking? Sony HD Cam ñ it records like a pro. He said to me.
-Whatever, you are the cameraman for today.
-Hello boss, I have come. Looks like the shooting hasnít started yet.
Shyam - please hold this reflector and stand there. Divya - you explain the scene to Sashi.
Shakeel -you arrange the camera for Sashi in low angle over here.
Chakram - you take making pictures in the digicam. Divya ñ have you explained the scene to Sashi?
-Ya, its done. -Sashi, shall we go for a take?
-WHERE IS THE TRIPOD DUDE?
-Actually RJ, Tripod could not be arranged. He said he will give it tomorrow.
-DID HE SAY THAT? -Ezzactly!
-Chakram, please bring that stool. You arrange that cam over the stool. I DONíT WANT ANY SHAKES!
YOU BE IN YOUR POSITION MAN!!! From where do these people come to act in films?
-RJ, just a minute. -What happened?
-I donít know where the recording button is.
-Arrgh! Even I donít know where it is. Here! You have to press this button.
-RJ, what should I press to stop recording? -You will press the same button idiot!
You turn the other side MAN!
-RJ, is my make-up OK?
-Your face will not be seen in this shot. So not a problem!
-Divya, I shouldnít turn back, right?
-Yea. You shouldnít turn back, you shouldnít move. -For how much time?
-TILL I SAY CUT. YOU TURN THAT SIDE MAN!!!
-Rj, is it ok? -I havenít said CUT man!
-Shakeel, now I want Sashiís shot in this angle.
-RJ, you will not shoot my face even now?
-Itís the same shot Sashi, we are shooting from a different angle.
-Do you plan to show my face on screen? Looks like all shots are for only for my back.
-Sashi, these are rear shots. Later we shall shoot the front shots. THEN YOUR FACE WILL BE CLEARLY SEEN!
-You can do all these later.
Dude, what are you doing?
-RJ, we've got trouble! The battery is DEAD!
-Donít we have an extra battery?
-No.
We did not shoot even 1 scene Divya.
RJ, canít we manage with the captured shots in editing?
AAAARGHHHH!!! Tomorrow - same scene, same shots, same location! Please be on time!
-First I have to be on time. -RJ, please brush your teeth tomorrow and come to shoot.
The earth is SHATTERING with your breath! THE BAD SMELL is TERRIBLE!
Tilt it down slowly. Yea, dat's good! Shot ok!
Divya, give me the script. You explain the scene to Sashi.
-How should I act dude? I am getting laugh. I think I canít act.
-The scene is - your boyfriend - I mean Sashi.
He cheated on you. You have to look angrily, seriously at him.
-Hey Joseph. Now I want Lasyaís shot in a DUTCH Angle. Arrange for it. -Yea, I will do that.
-Thatís it! We just have to tilt the camera angle a bit. -Yea, tilt from the horizontal a bit.
Please Lasya, donít laugh. Be serious.
Do it seriously!
Look at Sashi angrily. Yea - like that - maintain it.
At times like these, any director would feel like -
-Sashi, we shall shoot the next scene. Get ready! -Which scene RJ?
-Break up scene, idiot, idiot, super idiot! Hey Divya, explain the scene to him again.
-Did I act well? -Now its break up shot. You have to seriously tell ëLetís break upí and then leave.
To Whom? Your boyfriend. Then Sashi will catch your hand and stop you.
-RJ, do you think Sashi catching my hand is necessary?
-Yea, that creates intensity in the scene.
You prepare for the scene. Joseph, are we ready?
-You just make sure that he does not catch you. Ok? -Yea
Sashi, it doesnít work for us anymore.
Please, you have to catch her hand
-Sashi, it doesnít work for us anymore. Letís break up.
-Lasya, stand and then walk away. Sashi, catch her hand.
You have to catch her hand!
CutÖ why are you not letting him catch your hand?
-Catch her hand Sashi! Are you not catching her hand? Or is she not letting you do that? -I am not getting her hand at all!
-You have to let him catch your hand! So many unnecesarry takes. We are losing energy here, and intensity in scene is going down. Let him catch your hand once.
This fellow-
Idiot!!! He is just trying to hold her hand. Not something else! Why are you so bothered about it?
-Who the hell are you to say packup?
-Lasya, enough of shooting, letís get out of here!
Get out man! Take your princess with you. We can get a better girl as heroine!
-RJ, we canít shoot without her! -What to do now?
RJ, canít we make a film without a heroine?
-You make it man! You make it! Where do these these morons get such stupid ideas!?
Divya, till now I thought I will need a heroine for the film. Now I feel any girl is enough to shoot. That girl should be you!
Divya, please ya, please accept. There are no other girls around.
-No, my parents wonít accept. -I shall talk to your parents and convince them.
-No way, they wonít accept! -Please accept Divya! Please! -Please accept Divya! Please!
-Sashi, it doesnít work for us anymore. Letís break up.
-Camera should glide from there to down - it should go left like this - and then go close to Sashiís face. Thatís the SHOT!
-Not possible! Bring a jimmy jib! Not possible! It's impossible man! No way!
-Dude, the shot was over! Enough of scratching her hand!
-How many times I have to tell you idiot! BE A MAN! YOU SHOULD BOIL WITH ANGER, AND IT SHOULD SHOW UP IN YOUR EYES!
Arrange the camera; this guy is ready to shoot.
-Tell this dialogue to me. -Go man go, if you love scratch her like a monkey, she will make you love scratch her like a gorilla :P
-Sashi, you have to go near the girl with the bike and make her fall for you.
-RJ, these days girls are not impressed even with an R15 bike. Do you think a girl will fall for me if I drive this ancient bike?
-You take this bike dude. Why are you bothered about the logics!?
Sir, please give me one chance to act.
Ahhhm. No, we are almost at the end of shoot. Sorry!
Can you consider me atleast for the next film?
Hmm. Letís see - for the next movie. Ok?
GO MAN! I TOLD YOU, RIGHT!?
O yea! If I make use of him in this scene, it would all make sense!
Hey man, come here!
During the time you went from here to there, I wrote a scene for you. You have to act well, ok?
-Why are you following my Ex?
-Who the hell are you? -I just told you that she is my Ex!
-Hit him! Hit him! Much harder! Yea, hit, hit!
Punch his stomach! Break his ribs!
-Stop it idiot! Sir, he is hitting me really!
-I have instructed him to do so for reality. -What are you talking!? Will you kill me for this movie?
-Letís have 1 more shot! -Another shot!?
-I didnít find the hitting completely real. -Oh God!
-Hey Sashi, did he really hit you? -Shakeel!
-What is it RJ? -I would like to talk to our crew at the office.
-RJ, what happened man!?
-For the last scene, I want rain!
-Rain!? From where will we bring rain? -We have to bring it!
-How will we arrange rain? -We have to arrange it!
-How will we arrange for rain man? -Just like how they make it in regular films.
-Hello. We donít have that much budget!
-Why are you so worried RJ? Just display a scrolling int the edit that ëIT IS RAINING NOWí. I have done the same in my last short film.
-What a stupid idea that is!
LET THE RAIN FALL!!!
We completed the shoot somehow. Next Level is PP ñ I mean Post Production work. Just as how Ram searched for Sita in the forests, we went in search for a good Post Production studio.
We kept our mouths wide open when we heard that they charge Rs 350 per hour! We shut them and then we got the post production work done with another group of eccentric guys ñ the editor and the sound folks!
-Hey letís work on this scene later. You have to cut the shot where Swathi is walking, and intercut it where Sashi is crying. -Aaaarghhh, heís killing me!
-RJ, leave me man! Why are you so worried!? I will take care of it! I will tear this film!
-Dude, you just have to cut it properly. I donít need somebody who tears it!
-Listen guru! Because of ill luck I am here. Otherwise I planned to work with Trivikram, Rajamouli, Bommarillu Bhasker. But I am working for you. This is not a short film; consider it as a big film.
-It looks like I am so very lucky!
-Look here; I got a brilliant idea! -Whatís that!?
-Do you see the heroine? -Yes.
-There are gaps on either side of her. -Ah, yes.
-If we drop flowers in those gaps, it would look wonderful!
-Dude, this is my baby. Donít spoil it with your wedding video effects. Just cut the shots properly. donít do any extra cuts and effects! Ok!?
-You are the one who is doing extras! -Enough of what youíve said! -We will do what directors ask us to do!
-You have to do! What did Mani Ratnam say? A director has to liberate talent from his team. Creativity comes out when you break from the lines you drew as limits, and that makes you different from others.
-STOP YOUR LIBERATION DUDE! Leave me, I will fade out! -Hm, ok. Fade in another hour.
Hey you jerk! I need a match cut there.
-What is there in this match cut!? We see a lot of short films. Do we have match cuts in them?
-This one will have. -I make marriage videos. Did I ever use a match cut?
As a matter of fact, the short film I edited - ëCurd Dishí. It has zero match-cuts and came out wonderfully!
- Thatís a crap movie ëCurd Dishí! That director casts the same girl as his heroine, and the same guy as the hero. The girl is forever shy.
Even the guy feels shy like a girl. They come with crazy titles like ëSambar-Idlyí, ëCurd Dishí. And they are watched by lakhs of viewers on youtube, facebook.
-Look guru, either the heroine or the director has to be good. Then the movie will be automatically a hit on youtube.
-Sadly, thatís how the trend is on the internet.
Anyways, you texted me to watch another short film, whatís that? -ëWhatís thereí?
-Whatís there? Hmm. Whatís there in it MAN!? Thereís nothing except hitting a door. There's no sense in that film! And the director has got a chance in the telugu film industry. I wonder how the industry folks will manage with people like these.
-Just as how I am managing with you now. -Whatever! You sit here and do a match cut.
-You shouldíve told this first. -That was the thing I told before the argument started.
-Ey! Get up; I have edited most of the video. Just this one scene has a lot of grains. Remove them, ok?
-Itís my responsibility to give you a grainless video.
-Give me a grainless video, not a brainless video. I will get the poster done. -Please do that; for some time I can work peacefully.
♪♪ humming a tune ♪♪
Super, fantastic, awesome, excellent!
-I heard this tune somewhere. -Yes.
-You donít know; itís Yogi B Natcharaís Rap song! These fools come to film world without proper cinema knowledge.
-We want something new bro. If we want to use someone elseís compositions, there are thousands of Hollywood soundtracks that we can download. Understand why you are you here! And what use these strings are for!!! Ok!?
-Is it!? So you want something new! -Yea.
-Then I have to dope.
-Have whatever you want. If the composition doesnít come out well, then be prepared for a real dose of beating!
-Warning, huh! Catch this! -Be on it!
-RJ, a beautiful music is disturbing my wavelength.
-Here it is.
♪♪ This love scratching! You are a super scratcher! ♪♪
♪♪ Hey scratch it left and right ♪♪
♪♪ Scratch it up and down ♪♪
♪♪ Scratch the skin like you TEAR IT!!! ♪♪
-Stop it dude! -What happened sir, you did not like it?
-The original composer of the song will scratch you. We will be in trouble with copyright issues!
I donít want these kind of songs bro. Compose something which is pleasant and happy. Please, I beg you for that.
-We uploaded the filmís poster on FB, right!?
-Tell me the truth RJ. You uploaded the poster with a girl on it, right!?
-Yea boss. Earlier we uploaded a poster without a girl on it. We just got 2 likes and 0 comments.
-You do your work man, we will do ours!
-Yea, I will do mine. -Yea, do it, do it.
Bro, this is good man; it sounds original. You've been playing playing all nonsense for the last 2 days.
-Pull this track up, thatís it! Leave it there. Remove this track from here.
-This piece is not syncing with this scene. This segment works well for the climax.
-Dude, you made me cry for a lot of time, but finally you gave me wonderful music.
-Thank you bro. I salute you for your work!
-I salute to you too, and to your film too. Itís a hell of a work!
-Swathi, Please donít go away from me.
-Eh! Tell it expressively man!
-Ditto (with proper expressions)
-Sashi, it doesnít work for both of us.
-Why is your brother after my sister?
-I am innocent sister; he is the one who is after me.
-Burn the CD then. -Even that is done.
-Eh! Finally you are in form. Even though you troubled me a lot, there are a lot of techniques that I learnt from you.
Like what you said, you should be working with many top directors. You have to edit for my next films also, ok? Stay in touch, huh! >
Swathi, please forgive me. I will never do anything like this again.
I will always be with you like your dog. As you like it by William Shakespeare.
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There are some people who think that they can make a film because they have an SLR camera. Cinema is an amalgamation of several arts which have to be handled with finesse.
There are many people who become popular by making movies with the ease of digital filmmaking. But only a person who can make a film with technical subtlety can become a great film-maker!
Donít think short filmmakers are good for nothing. If we develop our skills in the right direction and catch the right opportunities, we can become commercial directors too.
-RJ means?
Ramu Jagannadh! > ♪♪ I am the Greatu. There is nobody greater than me. ♪♪
> ♪♪ There's none greater than me ♪♪
♪♪ Heís got tonnes of talent ♪♪ ♪♪ Heís a mastermind, a crazy freak, and a mesmerizing magician ♪♪
♪♪ My eyes are cameras. The films I make are sure shot hits. ♪♪
♪♪ Heís a film Midas to turn pens, gems and even hens into Oscar material ♪♪
♪♪ I will take a Zero. And make him into a Hero. ♪♪
♪♪ If I seriously work hard, I can create a film that even God will wonder at ♪♪
♪♪ I am the the Greatu! Greatu! Great, great, great, greatu, greatu ♪♪
♪♪ I am the the Greatu! Greatu! Great, great, great, greatu, greatu ♪♪
♪♪ I am the the Greatu! Greatu! Great, great, great, greatu, greatu ♪♪
♪♪ I am the the Greatu! Greatu! Great, great, great, greatu, greatu ♪♪
♪♪ RAP ♪♪
♪♪ I am the boss. I will change the thoughts. ♪♪
♪♪ I am the boss. I will change the thoughts. New trends start with me. ♪♪
♪♪ I break all previous records. THIS IS ME, I AM THE GREATUUU! ♪♪