The Real L Word S2E7 - English Transcript

Previously on The Real L Word Can you just not drink tonight?" I hate someone telling me how I'm gonna *** live my life. One night is all I ask for. I gotta talk to you. I want to give up drinking. Why do you not want to drink? 'cause I don't want something like that to have so much power over us. - You're such an ***. - You know what? You can project your *** on me - I was just trying to make peace between you guys. - I would never do that to you. That's what I said and Claire threw a big fit, and look what she said: "It's cool, I look good. You all look fake and crazy. So *** y'all. " I'm not gonna take this anymore. I'm really done with Claire. So I'm moving on to bigger and better things. What the ***?! Francine threw all of my stuff out on her front doorstep, like garbage. Vivian. Pee day! It's going to be so gross knowing that there's *** up there. We have a doctor. We know how we're going to do it. - You're ready. - So today's the day? Oh, my God! Dr. Morris told us that it'd be more effective if we did two rounds of insemination. - Hi, Dr. Morris. - I have bad news. What's wrong? The nitrogen tank discharged or something over night. What do you mean? Like, it I'm pissed. Chanel, it's time to go. It's time to go. Okay, we can go, but don't come at me like that. You can't really handle big gulps of Sajdah. You gotta sip it slow, and I'm serving her up really big gulps right now. One more issue like this, we done. I mean, if we're gonna have a real makeup, we need to make up the proper way, take the next step. Chanel and I are finally having sex. Boy, was it worth the wait. You're my favorite. I would hope so. Things are going really well with Chanel and I. We've been together for over a month now, and we've progressed a lot. I mean, we're intimate. I don't know I think it's time to take the next step. You movin' in. You're my wife. We should practice. - Practice what? - Being married. You just want to have sex. Not just the sex I want you around all the time. At this point, Chanel and I have been seeing each other damn near every day. And, like, I can't get enough of it. She's sexy as ***. Easy. I mean, I hump her in public. She gets really upset about it. I mean, ***, it's the perk of being in a relationship. I want to *** you. Come on, there are people here. Ouch. We could have sex right here, no one would know. Pin you up against the machine. Come on. Stop! You movin' in. Sajdah is really going overboard with the P. D. A. , like, to the point where I just want to yell at her to let her know, like, enough is enough. I was just trying to *** you out. That's what I'm saying. I don't want to be banged out. - *** that. - Stop. Don't! What do you mean we just stayin' on the weekends? You movin' in. You're making me upset. Why? Don't be upset with me. I'll do you. Come on. Please stop. Today is kind of hard, because one of our three vials of *** went bad, so we're already running out. I really just want Cori to be pregnant, and, you know, I was raised catholic, and I just feel like the right thing to do is to just go to the church and light a candle and just hope that it works. In this process, faith is really important. There's something about getting on your knees and really focusing in on just what you want and having conversations with someone out there who might help. It's killing me that this we can't just just clap my hands and, like, make a baby. Every time I see a kid, that's all I want. I look at Cori, and I see her face, and I see her smile, and I think about our life together, and I can't imagine not having kids. I can't imagine not wanting somebody else like her in the world. I'm headed to go pick up Vivian at the airport. I haven't seen her in the past month. Now that Francine is completely out of my life and completely out of the picture, it makes me think a lot more about where I am in my life, and if I'm gonna be with anybody, it's gonna be with Vivian. Hi. Hey, babe. Hi. Oh, my God. Oh. I'm so excited. Oh, how are you? Good. You look cute. Oh, you look good. You're gonna make my life normal again? Oh, my God. I can't believe you're here. - I know. - This is so unreal. I haven't flown into L. A. in years. Thank you. You like it? - Are you happy to be here? - Yes. Look at it, look at it. L. A. Yay. - Can't believe we're in L. A. together. - I know. Did you think that that would ever happen? No. I know that Claire and Franny have gotten into a big fight, and I am pretty surprised that it only took this short amount of time for everything to fall to pieces, but I wouldn't have come if things were going well between them. You in L. A. with Francine. Always always good way to not make me sleep at night. I'm sure we'll be seeing her, no? I *** hope not, but I'm sure we will. We will. It sounds horrible to say, but had things gone differently with Francine, I may have not tried to get Vivian to come out as much as I did, but it's good to just see a familiar face, and to see a face that doesn't want to rip my head off every second of every day. You know, I like to be joined at the hip, but sometimes I feel like we start bickering - when we're joined at the hip. - I like how you already you're already thinking about us not getting along, which actually usually doesn't happen. You're confusing me with your other Asian. - Don't say stuff like that. - Why? I don't think that. I'm really happy that you guys hit it off. She wants me to call her daddy. Oh, she calls me daddy. Oh, my God. Just kidding. - So you know Claire and I aren't speaking any more, right? - Yes. - Why? What happened? - Oh. - Things just haven't been good. - I happened. I want to know. Not even that no, no. I get this email from her she goes like this, "everyone's such a loser on the show. No one even had a real job. Everyone works in retail and does makeup that's not a real job. " And then she's like, "hello, Francine, putting all our differences aside, - will you come and support my new project?" - Good. So, basically, she talks *** about everyone and wants us to help her. The last time I saw Claire is when she had some nasty things to say to me on the night of Whitney's party, and then automatically after that, "would you have time for a photo shoot?" Like, really? Really? That's awkward. And then she's like, "yeah, and Whitney all she does is party for a living. " ***, you moved here with no job. Go back. Go. - Ew. I hate people like that. - Who does she think she is? What the *** does she think that I'm doing? I'm working my *** off on a jewelry line and a brand-new job and getting sober, and hearing somebody just go out there and say that you do nothing, I was just like, "who does she think she is?" Like, what the *** does she have going on? It just struck a chord, and I was just like, "*** you. Like, you don't know any of us. " Oh, you know what she said about Sara? She said she has "dog face. " Oh, hell, no. I was like, "all right, she's a Deb. Like, she's done. " So I just text everyone I knew. Romi texted me what? "Just found out Claire calls us all losers who don't have real jobs. We do makeup and hair and retail, and all we you do is party. Wow. I don't even know what to say. And I was about to help her with the shoot, but I guess I can tell her I'm too busy playing with lipstick. Who does this *** think she is?" That's a ***' Deb, dude. I think she's ***' ***. Yeah, "talking mad ***, called Sara a dog face and said Rachel's ***. " I don't know what to make of Claire. Like, we met, and I thought things were cool, and then all of a sudden, I start hearing she's talking *** about us. Here's the thing, dude you can't hold your own in any city. You're wack. You have no personality and no *** soul. - So good luck in any city. - No one likes this girl, dude. But Claire had the nerve to send me an email recently asking me to model for a ***' photo shoot she's doing, even though she talks mad *** and asks us all, dude. Why would you come to a new city and talk *** about people that, "a," you don't know, and, "b," that are a pretty big friend circle? You could've had a friend circle, you could've had everything, and you created this *** situation by talking ***, so bye! That was so fun, in my apartment, when I would come home, and you would be in nothing, cooking me dinner after work. I felt like such the man. Sorry. - That was the life. - Yeah, well It would be so good It was a choice of yours to leave that life. I question my decision. But you'll be back. I have we have more projects to do. Vivian came here to visit and to work on the Dirty Boudoir stuff with me. The photo shoot that I'm doing is for the initial launch of the website. Vivian's gonna help style it, and Whitney and Romi are gonna be models to generate some buzz about the site. Thank you for cooking. Mm, mm, mm. Hey, hey, hey, hey! Little ***, little ***. Spending the day with Vivian, you know, really reminds me that before I moved out here, I had a really nice life with her. I need to, you know, grow up and realize that I have the best thing that I'm ever gonna have, and the grass is not any greener on the other side. Like, despite the ups and the many ups and downs, you know, temper tantrums and all, it doesn't take a lot of apologizing on your part to make it okay on mine. - Mm - No? Sometimes you put up a big stink. Well, because sometimes you're a big *** - Mm-hmm. - Therefore - Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm. You could work a little harder. Yes, I agree. - I'm generally pretty easy. - Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. All my friends back in New York say that Vivian's the perfect match for me, and I really want her to come to be a part of my life out here, 'cause whenever Vivian is around, things are just better. Oh! Arms out! Oh, my God, you look like a little girl. - Do you like it? - I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it. I love it, love it, love it. I need sun. Let's go down by the water. Come this way. How are you? You look cute. Your skin looks better. - Yeah? - It cleared up. Have you noticed? 'Cause I'm not drinking. Yeah, huh. Things have been going a lot better in my relationship right now. Kelsey's looking for a job. When you remove the alcohol from everything, you get more a peace, and you're able to communicate. I don't think anybody looking in would be like, "that's perfect," but we're at least in this together. You know what I think I'm gonna miss? - Hmm? - Bloody Marys, sun. Why don't we just make Bloody Marys, like, with no ***? Well, I don't know if I'm gonna give up alcohol forever, hon. Like, I would have it in moderation. But isn't the whole thing that you can't have it in moderation? And you're not gonna quit forever, you're gonna have a drink eventually. I probably will. That's not getting sober! I deal with it in my own way. I'm not gonna do it exactly how you're going to do it. I think you think because you're not drinking right now that you don't have a drinking problem. I don't drink a lot to begin with. Kelsey Grace, that's why you're not drinking now! I'm just saying down the road, I might have a drink or two. I might have a *** beer. It's not that big of a deal. Oh, my God, this is turning into a stupid argument. I'm not the one with the problem. Romi is. I definitely don't need to drink all the time, but on occasion, if I want to have a drink with my sister or whoever, I would like to do that and not feel pressure that I can't. You know, I don't want to live my life with a bunch of pressure on me I can't take it. I don't know what she's thinking with everything going on. I almost don't know if she's getting what I'm going through. I have 1,500 things to deal with right now, that I really don't even want to, like, tackle this issue right now. If you feel like it's worth it to go and drink and then just see what happens with us, then you're definitely playing with fire there. I don't think so. Hmm. I don't have the energy at all to be upset right now. Good. It just lets me know what's down the road, and I didn't expect to hear that from you. What you guys buy me? Wow! She found those and fell in love. - Are you serious? - Yeah. - Like, pre-cut zigzag signs? - Yeah. I told her I need I don't know what to put on this poster, 'cause I know nothing, and she said, "anything about booties, blocking, fishnets, or *** is good. " We're making signs, because my friend Meredith "Smack" Efron is going to be in her first roller-derby bout, so my friend Jess and I want to show our support with lots of glitter and sparkles. "Anything silly will work. " Like, "you're going," and then down. I like it. By the way, my acupuncturist, Virginia, swears I'm pregnant, because my *** are swollen and sore, and it's too soon for P. M. S. Like, they hurt. Really? Holy! Let the doctor inspect. - Wow. - I know. Let me see up here. - Jessie is sitting right here, baby. - I love you. At work, all I do is just think, "did I feel something?" "Wait, my nostril flared do you think I'm pregnant? Is that a pregnant thing? Can you Google that?" It's been a little bit like that in our home. "My eyebrow twitched. Does that mean I'm pregnant? Do pregnant women's eyebrows twitch?" She's kind of right, but I'm freezing in here. Casey was right. Are you really cold? Seriously, feel my hands. - Holy moly, come here. - I told you. - I'm like an oven. - Feel this. - You're cold. - You are an oven. She is. It's a little bun Baking the cake, baking the cake. There's a bun in there. There's a bun in there. Maybe. Hopefully. I don't *** want to talk. What do you want to talk about? - But see, this is - All right, all right ha wait all right, all right, look no, okay, but listen to me real quick listen to me. How often do we actually sit and talk? Chanel says that we really just need to have a, um a conversation about our relationship and where it's going. I need to know that when I am ready to open up, you're there to listen. I don't need to be overpowered. I am that person that's just, like, chill. Like, you're on a 10, I'm on a 5, and you're trying to and I feel like you're forcing me to be that 10. No, I'm not, you could just stand there. I know I'm on 10, and it would be great to have you on 10 with me, so we could just be in our own little crazy, little world. When you're on 10 and you're *** me, you're bringing me into it. I don't want to be brought into it. We're talking about me like I'm a dog, like I need to get my nuts cut off or somethin'. Stop acting like one. It's not a funny - this is very serious. - Everything's a funny. I'm laughing, but I'm so serious, because it is something that annoys me. The lack of communication that we have does have a lot to do with Sajdah's inexperience in relationships, so it takes a lot of patience on my side, and it takes communication on hers, and it takes listening from both of us to understand each ether's point of view. Maybe if you let me *** you out at home, I wouldn't be trying to *** you out in public all the time. Okay, you know what? Rewind. - Do you do you really - Okay, okay, okay. - Are you really taking what I'm saying? - I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I do. - Then what am I what am I - not to hump you in public. Hey, Rache, how'd the interview go? I want this so bad, I was like, "I will suck you off right now if you give me this job. " It was so intense. Like, was that not intense? Today I had an amazing interview at the Vidal Sassoon Academy in Santa Monica. I've always wanted to work for Sassoon. I think it was stressful that there was, like, another person there interviewing for the job, too, - like, next to you - Yeah. So it, like, puts this other pressure on. - If I don't get this job - You're gonna do it. Don't worry. Think positive. I know I'm sorry, you're right. - You know? - You're gonna get the job. I am gonna get this job, and you know what? I'm - I told him today - Feel confident. If you give me the chance, I will work so hard. You know, I gave up my life to pursue a dream, um, in Los Angeles, you know. I had an amazing life in New York with people I really love and care about. So if I don't get it I'll probably be crushed. But everything happens for a reason, I guess. I won't know now until Friday, which is, like, getting tested for, like, *** or something, and, like, being like, "why can't you tell me now?" I can't believe that Claire was saying that *** to Franny about all of us. Like, I never said anything about Claire Yeah, I didn't know why she didn't like you. And I'm like, "what? I don't know what you're saying. " Why would Claire talk *** about us? Like, that's really *** stupid. Like, just she's blacklisting herself. So you better believe that next time I see her, I'm going to share my feelings with her. I think that would be really good. Yeah. - I'm a month sober. - A month? - Really? - Mm-hmm. - That's amazing. - I know. - It was Haute. - Today's your one month. - Yeah, it was Haute. - Oh! Remember when we went with everyone? I've been sober since. Wow. I haven't drank since that night. - Well, cheers to it. - Cheers to it. Romi literally has done a 180. Like, she's acknowledged she had a problem. She's done something about it, and now she's making forward steps to, you know, establish a career and her vision. With our jewelry, we're doing it in the sense of, everywhere you've traveled, you took a little piece and, like, got over-accessorized, - and you took it with you - Oh, yeah, that's good. - Where it's like a souvenir. - Yeah, that's good. - I'm very proud of you. - Thank you. Whitney's been a really good friend to me and has just really been there, and, like, she just keeps saying, like, "I'm proud of you," and to hear one of your friends say that when nobody really wants to be around you any more because you're not fun, it means a lot. So tomorrow we're waking up, we're going downtown, we're buying all the stuff, and then we're making pieces all day. Well, that's good, 'cause I feel like now we're both - on, like, a path of, like - Yeah. - focus, and, like, getting our *** done. - And it's nice to, like, talk to other people that are doing that. Mm-hmm. How are you and kelsey doing? We are on two different worlds right now. Like, we just are. I mean, is she sober? She's sober. She said today, though, she doesn't want to be sober forever, and I was like, "okay, I do. " Like, I'm not on a cleanse. I'm, like, doing a lifestyle change completely right now. - Yeah. - We're not getting younger. There's gotta be a time where we start finding someone to, like, you know, kind of build a life with. Whitney's been there for me through a lot of my ups and a lot of my downs, and being able to sit down and have a conversation with Whitney about our future feels really good. You know, I don't necessarily get this conversation at home with kelsey, and I don't get it from a lot of my friends. "You will soon gain something you have always wanted. " "You will have gold pieces by the bushel. " That means that you're gonna get a lot of ***. - Oh, is that what it means? - No. Good. Good. I don't need that. - Thank you for dinner. - You're welcome. It's nice to be treated. So, babe, are you excited? I'm nervous. Year and a half in the making. All of us in the same room. I pray for peace. So tonight we're gonna go to the party at Haute. Francine has said that she was gonna go to this party as well. Vivian and Francine have met before, but this is gonna be the first time that we will all three be under the same roof. So I'm a little bit nervous. I'm gonna be sitting there like like a tool, with my thumb in the air, being like, wow, now my girlfriend and my ex-girlfriend are dancing on the dance floor. That's not gonna happen. I won't do that to you. - Please don't do that to me. - I won't. - You look great. - Thanks. I'm proud I'm proud to walk in with you. Oh, thank you. - I hope I don't disappoint you. - You make me look good. It'll be interesting to be seeing Francine with Vivian there. I think of anything that it's a better way to see her with a little bit of a buffer, because she can't probably say the things that she'd probably want to say to me. I feel really excited that this is all about to blow up in my face. It's frickin' freezin' here. We're at Haute, and Ruby is talking to Claire. I see a good opportunity to come in and approach Claire. I've heard through the grapevine you've been talking *** - about me, I'm not gonna lie. - About you? - I have said nothing mean about you ever. - I'm not gonna lie. It's all hearsay so far that Claire has been saying things about myself and other people, and so, you know, I want to give her the opportunity to at least own it or not. 'Cause I swear to God, dude, I have only said I've been nice to you, said nice things. I don't understand what's going on here. But I don't understand who's saying that, because I don't think that I've never said a bad thing - You don't know who's saying it? - Who? Is it Francine saying that? Francine. I feel like my whole self just, like, dropped, 'cause I I was like, "what? What?" Francine had really decided to throw me under the bus with these girls. Okay, "just found out Claire called us all losers. We don't have real jobs, we only do makeup and hair and retail, and all we do is party. Wow, I don't even know what to say. " That's Romi telling me that. Why the *** would I say this? So Claire responds shocked, but I see a little "deer in the headlights" coming through her eyes, I'm not gonna lie. Do I think that you meant the things you might have said? No. Do I think maybe you were like, "oh, I wish I didn't say some things?" Yeah. Oh, my God, look who's here! When I first met Vivian, it was through Claire, but Claire was in New York, and Vivian was in Los Angeles visiting. So this is the first time I've seen them together as a couple. I really wish Khristianne was there, because it'd be maybe a little easier to see Vivian and Claire together, but she is out of town working this weekend. Why did she talk *** about me, though? - I don't - Like, why? Because she has a complex. I told her tonight. - I was like, "listen" - What did she say about that? - She what did she say about that? - She was like, "I never said - anything about you. " - She did say it. How could I even lie about that? Why would I lie and make up stories? Like, I don't how could that even come out of my own mouth? "Whitney, I guess, told her I was too cool for school, which I am, so *** all y'all, have fun in *** drama land. You are so shady. " She throws everyone under the bus. I don't judge anyone. She's not as innocent as she's portraying herself. Francine shows me the text from Claire, kind of confirming she was talking ***. Claire, I'll tell you right now, probably the thing you don't want to do is unnecessarily burn a bridge with me. Come on, my baby. Come on, my sister. Baby, be cool. Hi, Claire. Hi, Francine. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you, too. I'm Francine. You have a bad attitude. Yeah, I have a bad attitude? And you didn't say sorry. - I just saw a mass text you sent out. - Oh, yeah? Yeah. That was cool. - That was really cool of you. - Oh, you're gonna cause drama? - 'Cause I'm not into it. - Cause drama? I don't have judgments about people, and you're talking ***, - and - Oh, so now you're gonna start. - This is not the time or place. - You're telling me that I'm lying about people? - You did. - You you don't you don't want to start. This is what you said about everyone. You told me that everyone's a loser on the show, and no one has a real job except for me, - and you know what? - Really, I said all that stuff? Yeah, you did. You said it on text you told me that. And then you told me that Sara has a dog face. - Okay. - You didn't say that? Tell me to my face you didn't say that. - I *** didn't say that. - Oh, really? Yeah. You are a lying person. - You're a *** liar. - Wow, wow, this girl's lying. You're lying. Like, you're gonna lie to my face and say you didn't say it, when I have text messages to prove it? It's such an ugly person that she showed me that night. Yeah, I was the one screaming, but for you to be able to look into my eyes and lie, just because everyone else is around us, that broke my heart. And that was it. You broke my heart. Francine, you're *** literally making an *** out of yourself. Put it out there. You want to talk ***? - 'Cause I never judge anyone. - What did I say about them? - You you told me that - What did I say about them? Whitney doesn't have a real job - I never said this ***. - And all she does for a living - is party. - I never said that. I never You promise on your dead grandmother? - Yes, I promise on my dead grandmother. - Oh, really? - Wow, you're evil. - I never ***' said that. - You're evil. How can I pull this out of my ***? - I'm evil? - How the *** could I pull this out of my ***? - I'm evil? I'm evil? Claire and Francine started to throw down at the pavilion. I was like, "that's just messy. " - I didn't say *** about any of these people. - And party all day. Oh, my God. You're lying. - You're a *** liar. - You're lying! When she's frustrated, she gets all agitated, and that's when her temper flares up. I mean, honestly, Claire was making herself seem like an idiot. But I never said You've made so many comments about everyone. *** Franny, you're a compulsive ***' liar. - Oh, really? - You've lied - you have lied to me the entire *** time. - *** you. *** you. In the moments where I've hated Francine the most, I would never have done this to her. I would never had said these I would never have wanted people to hate her. Like, I honestly, like, yes, she's like, "yeah, Sara's hot," and I was like, "yeah," I was like, "she's cute," - she's not her type, but whatever. - But I'm like, "she's not my type," and all I said was that. Yes, I may have made a joke All she said was she wasn't her type. In the heat of the moment, like, da-da-da-da, but, like, I have I don't know these girls. I'm not gonna talk *** about people I don't know. Oh, come here, come here, come here, come here. I just feel like I just I am not lying. Like, I'm being real, you know? Yeah, I know, and the point is, is to make sure you're not. I'm sorry. Are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine, but she's been talking *** about everyone. - I know. I'm sorry. - You know I'm not a liar, - and you know I'm real. - I know, I know, I know. You know I'm not a fake person, right? - I know, I know, I know. - You know that? - Yes. - If I was a liar I'm a lot of things in life I'm a cheater, I'm an ***, but I'm not a liar. I just, like, don't like it when she lies. I know, I know, I know, I know. I love you. - Thank you, thank you. - All gonna be okay. I know. Just hang in there, just hang in there. When Claire is upset about Francine or if anything happens in that area, it very directly affects my day and my life. Sometimes I really do get very annoyed, because it's not my ***, but it has indirectly become my ***, and I'm like, "w why?" I just don't understand. It's like I can't communicate. Do you understand what I mean by, like when I said to you it's like, I can't communicate with her? It's like there's no dialogue, it's just do-do-do-do-do, and then it's just like you know? It's like, I loved that girl for so many years, and she *** me so bad. Tonight just sealed the deal that Francine really *** hates me. She just really wants me to feel pain. It's just if anything, it's if there was ever a sign to let this to let this go, it is this is the sign. Oh, my God. Francine's crazy. - Oh, thank you. - Hey, Lou. Lou, Lou! Lou, come on. Come on, Lou. Oh, those are the little pieces? Yes, you're gonna love, I think. So Vanessa is my business partner in the jewelry line, and I'm really excited, because at this point, we are in a place to show the collection. I want to wear them with hoodies, and, like, be It's so cute! The one you were looking at this one? Oh, this. My line is called "Hija," which is Spanish for "daughter. " So it's me allowing myself to have something that is mine and something that feels close to my family and my father. I got Udi's number. Udi is the chief designer of this amazing website Love and Pride Jewelry. He created the jewelry line for the original L Word, and he gives 10% of the proceeds to lgbt charities, so fingers crossed that we get to show it to him and see if it's something that he would wanna get involved with. - So I'm gonna call him - Okay. And see. Yeah, I want what he wants to do with us. He wants to make us bagillion gazillionaires. Hello. Hi, this is Romi. - Hey, Romi, how are you? - Good. How are you? I'm good, good, good, good. Yeah, well, the line me and my business partner, like, my friend Vanessa she is a designer. We both were finding something that was special to us, which was, you know, like, the Mexican side of our family, like, my father, and her her side of her family and the colors and the inspiration being behind that. There's sentimental value behind this line for me, and I want it to work so bad. There's just so much of me and her put into it that I just want somebody to look at it and love it just as much as we do. We have little samples made, but they're not anywhere near what we could do, you know what I mean? They're just sample pieces, so that's where somebody like you would come in and really be able to help us. Yeah, definitely. Definitely. Yay. Thank you. I cannot wait to meet you. Same here. Bye. He's so nice! - He's gonna - Whoo! Figure out our date and our time, and then we can meet with him. - Are you excited? - Yeah! Are you gonna cry on me? I'm don't want to cry, 'cause then you're on your period and then I'm gonna cry, and then Yalda's gonna cry just 'cause she's next to us. I might. Now what Udi needs to see from me is the look the look of Hija, you know, and he wants to see the collection. I'm really excited. Working really hard on something that you love doing and that you believe in, like, is the best. If somebody could pay me to just be doing this, obviously, that'd be the best job in the whole world, 'cause I love it. No matter what happens, can we still go and, like, have a drink after? I'll have a drink, you'll have a drink And you can have some club soda. I'll have some club soda, yes, no matter what happens. This is not gonna work at all. Something isn't right? I mean, you think? Maybe we just duct-tape the *** out of the bottom. In doing the shoot, early idea was to get some of the other girls from the show to come and and and participate, but now, especially after last night, I doubt that's gonna be the case. Oh, God, I hate it when I do say stupid ***. It's just so upsetting, because that was something that was said, and, like, I don't even *** mean it. I'm sure I've made some comments in passing that probably weren't always complimentary, but I completely feel like Francine misrepresented what I said. Anyone would be a liar if they said they didn't do the same thing. Mm-hmm. And now I'm having to, like, acknowledge it, because Francine wants to make me look like a the devil and take it completely out of context. - It's okay. - It's so *** annoying that Francine has to go and, like, literally, like, completely just, like, make me look like a fool. Like, it's so annoying. It's just, like, so frustrating to me. It's, like, I feel so stupid, because Francine has to make me feel so stupid every time. It's okay. Okay. It's like, I didn't even do anything. I know, but just, you know Claire is a super brat. She's a large child, but she really does need to be able to apologize, and be mature, and handle what she needs to handle. It's like, how do I have the time to sit around and think about them, when I have moved into a new place? I have you dumping me. I have Vivian Francine throwing my *** out, I have a trying to find an apartment, trying to get a job, trying to set up this website. I don't have the time to sit here and, like, talk ***. Yo, I'm really crushed about this Sassoon ***, man. He didn't even call me. He ***' emailed me. The ***' lamest email he's like, "yo, Rachel, due to unexpected budget cuts, you know, we can't, like, offer you a position right now, but we definitely want you. We'll keep you posted. " Literally, it crushed me, and I, like, cried my eyes out. Like, I was on the floor. Like, I lost it, and, like - Then you - This is my dream. Okay, but and that dream it doesn't mean you need to abandon that dream at all, - you know? - I know, it's just like, I have no job right now, dude. It's lonely in L. A. when, you know, you don't have your work or your comfort circle, and, you know, granted, I have friends here, but it's lonely. I gave up my ***' life. Whitney is hard to break through, you know? And sometimes she's totally in her own world. I wish she would open her eyes up a little and maybe her heart and get out of Whitney world, and, you know, realize that I'm drowning a little here, you know? I am good. - I am good, you guys. - No, I know you are. What? - What was that thing - She's not in the right state. I think Rachel is really stressed out and depressed. I feel really, really bad for her, because Rachel had expectations that Whitney would kind of be a rock and a support system for her, and none of that is happening. I think that you make beds and then make me lie in them. I didn't ***' make any bed here. Whoa! Bye. - How are you doin'? - Mm. I was at work, and I was so excited, because we were gonna take the pregnancy test tomorrow morning. I mean, today's day 28. But then I started getting cramps I know. Then I went to the bathroom, and I got my period. Thought maybe I was special, and it would just work. Why wouldn't it, you know? Like, no matter how hard I tried not to get my hopes up, and how I said I didn't get my hopes up, like, I did, you know? I don't know. I just don't want to go through this again and again and again. Like, it's only been one time, you know, and it's taking so much It's okay, baby. And, like, if it didn't work this time, maybe it won't work next time or the next I don't know. All right, let's just take a deep breath. I got two different tests. Do you want to take them? Yeah, I guess. All right, boo, I'm right here. Okay. Nope. What? It was that fast? It already showed up, 'cause it's really ***' sure. I guess there was this little part of me that thought, you know, "we have the ***, we've been I've been doing everything right. Why wouldn't it happen?" And by it not happening, it just made me realize, you know, it might not be as easy as I would like it to be. You know, this could go on for months, years. I think that was the hardest thing. - It's just disappointing. - I know. Are we gonna try again in two weeks? Do you want to try again in two weeks? I really wanted a baby. Did you get me a cigarette? What do you think? What kind of wife would I be if I didn't? You got me a cigarette? I got two. I am clearly an enabler. God, I can't believe I'm about to do this. Three and a half weeks. You don't have to do it. I'm *** doing it. After all that drama the other night at Haute, I thought it might be a good idea to get the girls together and have a night without drama. This looks like a land that needs to be soaped! The backyard is a big mess, so I came up with an idea "hey, why don't we have a party, and make a fun event out of trying to landscape the yard?" Wait, I made I made a Powerpoint presentation and everything. - You did not really do it. - We're really doing this. - It's a work it's a working - You made a Powerpoint? I did. Really dorky. - I love that about you. - Don't tease me. Just gonna have a chill night and talk about what everyone would like to contribute to the backyard. Yeah? Hi, baby. How you feelin'? - Good, how are you? - Good. We got some serious work ahead of us. So Francine comes up with this crazy excuse to make us all do her yard work for her, and she disguises it as a party the "landscaping party. " I was not joking about the freakin' Powerpoint. Look I was I was not joking about this landscaping project either. Equal opportunity employer. I don't really know these girls yet. Um, I mean, we met before at a club, but, I mean, you don't really talk or get to know people at a club, so I'm a little nervous. All right, but I'm saying, like, I think that there should be a very zen-looking are you into zen? - Mm-hmm. - And I'll manage the hoes. So Sajdah's task is hoeing. Hoe management. Hoe management. Hoe management. I like that title. - Okay, that's it. Next. - Go. Sometimes I do feel like Sajdah and I have polar-opposite personalities. She's already in her her zone, where she's hyper and outgoing, and I'm really uncomfortable in new social situations. I get nervous, and I kind of just slump into this quiet zone. I'm not pressuring you to do anything, but you're standing off in a corner. - It doesn't make sense. - I'm not doing it on purpose. Damn, I'm not like you. Just let me have my time to talk to everyone and warm up the way that I want to. So then I'm supposed to pretend like you're not there? No, not that, but you're making an even bigger scene, because you came in here when I would've been out in a minute, - and I would've given - So you ready to go out? I would like a moment to myself. You want the keys? No, I don't need all that. I don't know like, she ended up, like, leaving and being in the bathroom for a while. I come in and talk to her, she wasn't really trying to hear what I was saying. I'm frustrated. I'm like, "forget it. " - Hi, baby. - Hey. - How are you? - I'm all right. - What's going on? - We need couples therapy. - You what? - I said I said we need couples therapy. What do you mean? What do you need therapy for? - It's 'cause you went too fast. - I don't know like, she'll be, like, off in a corner, so now it's like I'm here by myself, you know? - Like, she's upset. Like, she's in the bathroom. - She's upset. - Why? - Like, I'm well, 'cause I'm like I mean, I don't know I guess I wasn't, like, the nicest. Well, make her feel comfortable. Just let her be her. Let her do it her own way - and in her own time. - Makes sense. You know what I mean? There, there's your therapy. I'll send you a check in the mail or a bill, and you'll send me the check. Just be good to her. - I'm gonna go get her. - She's a sweetheart. - Go get her. - Thanks, mama. You're welcome, babe. I'm sorry. All right, but it's - I told you that yesterday. - You're right. And I want to apologize for just now, all right? You gonna text, or we gonna talk? I'm not even texting. I'm fine. I'm sorry. This is not a situation to apologize. No, but just now, like, the conversation we just had I apologize for that conversation. If you're feeling something, then tell me. No. Tonight's a rough night, because we're realizing that there's a lot we just don't know about each other yet. Emotionally, we just don't know enough about each other to function. I'm out of here before I'm single. No, it's not my purse. I'm excited to dig in the dirt, hon. I'm gonna get out of here and find a boyfriend. Things were easier then. Good night. Nice meeting you all. Nice to meet you. Is she gonna say bye? I'm just gonna meet her outside - Okay, give me a hug. - And then go. - I don't know. Tell her I said bye. - Good night. Chanel? Come on, babe. Huh? So I'm gonna just stand here and wait till you finish your conversation? It's over. It's time to go. Everyone's about to come out. Okay, well, I let me just finish this conversation, 'cause I'd like to talk to him in private. This is no good at all. I'm about to be on the couch. You ready to go? Chanel. - Do I have a choice? - No, you don't. You're right. You're right. You don't have a choice. That's funny? - What the *** what's going on? - Oh, my. Why are you doing this? So you're gonna ignore me like I'm not sit - I'm on the phone. Stop. - You can't call him back? - No. - Why you can't call him back? 'Cause I was in the middle of a conversation that you interrupted. I can't believe you're sitting on the *** phone like I'm not sitting here trying to talk to you. Tell him you'll call him back, and we can leave. This *** is funny to you. It's not funny. I'm just Get the *** off the phone, then. This relationship matters to me beyond anything else that's going on in my life, but somehow, you get in an environment, and you forget that. I have never in all of my life been in a relationship. I have never sacrificed the me for someone else. It's not easy for me to express myself like that. It's not easy for me to be vulnerable. You're laughing and being the the the joke of the party, talking about hoes, saying, "I got hoes," and this and that and just want to be Mr. Funny person. I don't feel that it's fair That you're not allowing me my time to grow and and know these people on my own terms. I've been feeling out of touch with my reality. Are you *** kidding me? - No, I'm not. - No, that's why 'cause you're not listening. You know what? You're not listening. You're not listening. - I'm ready to run again. - Run. - I'm ready to run again. - Run. You know, I ain't got time for this ***. You stupid as ***. I'll take you right back to where you trying to go. Chanel, what do you want to do? - 'Cause if you still want - I want you to just be real with me for a moment and let me see and feel that you understand what I'm saying and that I'm not going crazy by telling you the things - I feel like you are. - That I'm telling you I'm not. - I feel like you are. - I'm not. I feel like you're going crazy. Every time we're in a group setting, if I don't react the way that you expect me to, - you get upset. - You know what? If we're so ***' different, then why are we even having this conversation? You're so dominating in the situation that it overpowers the other people. If you have a problem with that, then you shouldn't be in a relationship with me. It's moments like these that really point out how different we are I mean, like, night and day. Like, I get that Chanel is different in social settings, you know? But, like, this is me, and I'm not gonna change for her or anyone else. What am I doing wrong? - I'm not critiquing you. - You are. What the hell? You're critiquing me. It's also about me. - It's not about you! - Well, maybe that's the problem. Maybe that's the problem, 'cause I'm not having this conversation again. That's not what a relationship is about! - Well, then let's not do it. - I had real feelings, and you think that other people in this world are gonna be like that not everybody's like that. We're young. This is new. We promised to have fun every day. I'm done with this, Chanel. Like, *** it, man. I'm not gonna change, 'cause I was - part of being in a relationship - Oh, *** it. I give up! I give up! I quit! I quit! I quit! You want to try so hard to prove that you're right, - and you you are so wrong. - Well, then you know what? If I'm so wrong, why are you still here? Because I'm I guess I'm just *** stupid. Stop fighting, please. Please stop fighting, 'cause I'm done. Good night. I fall out just as fast as I fall in, so I'm out.