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– Madalena! – What?
Come here, Madalena!
What? Why are you yelling? What do you want? I’m busy.
What is this, Madalena?
Poop.
And whose poop is this, Madalena?
Oh, okay, it’s mine, I’m sorry, it happens, it’s so embarrasing.
– Just flush it and it will go away. – Don’t flush it!
You can’t destroy the evidence. Leave it there!
What evidence? Is this some *** CSI? Cut it out!
You cut it out! Look at the size of this thing.
You know what it means?
That I've eaten açaí berries?
That you hate me, Madalena! That’s what it means.
Excuse me?
Look at the size of this thing. Is that 9 x 3 inches?
It looks like a Toblerone!
It looks like a baby’s thigh! Like there’s a rat in there, Madalena!
Fine. But does it mean that I hate you?
Yes, it does.
Because the person who's able to produce such a ***,
can't nag when I try to do some different stuff in our bedroom at night.
“Oh no, I don’t like it in the back door ‘cause it hurts.
Oh, I’m so delicate… I have an irritable bowel.”
– You can’t. – I get it, Edson.
– Do you agree with me? – I get it!
You called me just to say this. That’s what you wanted to say, right?
Yes, it was.
Because I haven’t heard anyone crying this morning.
If I had given birth to this hedgehog this morning, how would I be right now?
I would be in deep ***! I would be on all fours in the shower
letting the cold water run through my ***
and a trickle a blood would go down the drain with all my dignity
while bitting my fist.
That’s how I would be. But you looked great this morning.
– Listen, I’m not… – You were eating toast with Becel…
I can’t believe you’re relating these two things to each other!
Why not? Why not? Give me one reason for me not to do so.
Isn’t it the same hole? So yes, they’re related.
Well, Edson…
Fine, okay. It’s fair. You win.
– Very good. – You win.
Let’s be a little bold tonight then.
– Great. – All right?
Now we’re talking.
Edson, tell me.
Doesn’t your morning poo poo look just like this?
Only when I eat açaí berries…
Sometimes, if I forget that I’ve eaten it…
Then yes.
Maybe I'll call Lidia and ask her if I can borrow her strap-on.
Let’s stick to the missionary today?
Fine! Okay.
Tradução e legendas: Melissa Prado
Did it work?
No.
Oh my god… I got this with Miriam.
I don’t think it will work…
Let’s…
– Where’s the best spot? – Call Ramalho, the janitor.
– You think? – Ask him for a crowbar, and also a chain.
I think we should use our hands.
No, Madalena. No.
Are you going to hang it?
No, Madalena, don’t hang it.
But it’s mine.