Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
- PREVIOUSLY THIS SEASON ON VANDERPUMP RULES...
I WANT IT SEXY.
[all cheering]
- AWESOME, GREAT. THERE YOU GO.
- WHOO! - [laughs]
[bleep].
- I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU. YOU KNOW THAT, RIGHT?
- LET ME SEE THE INSIDE OF YOUR ARM.
OH, MY GOD.
- I JUST THINK YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL.
- YOU ARE DISGUSTING.
- I HAVE A SEX PROBLEM.
- LIKE A SEX ADDICT? - YEAH.
- AND I LOOK BACK ON OUR RELATIONSHIP,
AND I'M LIKE, "HOW THE [bleep]
DID I DATE SOMEONE THAT MEAN, THAT MANIPULATIVE?"
- GOD, YOU SAY SOME HURTFUL THINGS, MAN.
- I ACTUALLY HAVE A QUESTION FOR YOU.
WILL YOU MARRY ME?
- OF COURSE I WILL. [laughs]
- YOU'RE ENGAGED, MOTHER[bleep].
- I DON'T WANNA COMPARE MY RELATIONSHIP
TO THE RELATIONSHIPS MY FRIENDS HAVE,
BUT WINNING.
- ME AND ARIANA MADE OUT IN A SWIMMING POOL
AT THE [bleep] GOLDEN NUGGET, YES.
- YOU HOOKED UP WITH MY BOYFRIEND.
- I'M SMARTER THAN YOU.
I'M PRETTIER THAN YOU.
GET THE [bleep] OVER IT, AND MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE.
- WE ALSO HADN'T HAD SEX IN THREE MONTHS.
- BUT I DID NOT GO AROUND
AND [bleep] SOMEONE BEHIND YOUR BACK.
- JAX AND KRISTEN HAD SEX IN JANUARY.
- WHAT? - THAT'S DISGUSTING, STASSI.
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE ENTERTAINING
THIS IDEA RIGHT NOW.
- WHY IS SHE STILL WORKING HERE?
- I CANNOT FIRE SOMEBODY BECAUSE THEY
SLEEP WITH YOUR EX-BOYFRIEND. - IT'S NOT ABOUT THAT.
YOU BANGED MY EX-BOYFRIEND.
- I DIDN'T *** JAX.
- YES, WE SLEPT TOGETHER.
- YOU ARE DISGUSTING!
- I DON'T BELIEVE IT FOR A SECOND.
- TOM, I'M GONNA SHOW YOU THE TEXT VERBATIM
ABOUT HOW SHE'S TRYING TO COVER IT UP.
- "JAX, DELETE THIS TEXT RIGHT AFTER YOU GET THIS.
"I THINK STASSI KNOWS.
"I NEED TO KNOW IF YOU TOLD ANYONE ELSE,
SO I CAN COVER MY BASES."
DID YOU USE PROTECTION?
- ONCE.
- [sighs]
[Dena Deadly's Raise Your Glass]
- ♪ YOU KNOW ♪
♪ THAT IT'S OUR TIME ♪
♪ THESE ARE THE BEST DAYS ♪
♪ OF OUR LIVES ♪
♪ JUST RAISE YOUR GLASSES HIGH ♪
♪ THIS ONE'S FOR YOU TONIGHT ♪
- ♪ PACK YOUR BAGS ♪
♪ 'CAUSE THE PARTY ISN'T DONE YET ♪
♪ WE GOT ONE MORE DAY ♪
♪ TILL THE SUN SETS ♪
♪ LET'S GET AWAY ♪
♪ OH, YEAH, PERFECT SUNDAY ♪
all: HI. - HI, YOU GUYS.
WELCOME, HAVE A SEAT.
- SHE BROUGHT A NEW VICTIM.
- THIS IS WHERE I TAKE ALL MY ***.
- TOMORROW IS OUR ANNUAL SUR PHOTO SHOOT.
AND I DON'T EVER WORK OUT,
BUT I HAVE TO DO WHAT I HAVE TO DO.
SO KATIE'S INTRODUCING ME TO THIS THING
WHERE YOU JUST SWEAT,
AND THEN YOU'RE MAGICALLY SKINNY.
I'M HERE TO SWEAT OUT THE KRISTEN TOXIN.
OKAY, MY LIFE HAS BEEN SO CALM
WITHOUT KRISTEN IN IT.
I FEEL LIKE A NEWBORN BABY RIGHT NOW.
IF SHE SHOWS UP TO THE PHOTO SHOOT,
ALL THOSE TOXINS WILL JUST COME RIGHT BACK INSIDE.
- I DON'T THINK SHE'S GONNA SHOW UP, THOUGH.
- I JUST NEED TO MAKE THIS *** QUIT.
- YOU KNOW HOW TO DO IT. YOU'RE THE BEST AT IT.
- I KNOW. SHE-- SHE'S A TOUGH ONE.
- SHE KNOWS ALL YOUR TRICKS TOO.
- SHE DOES KNOW ALL MY TRICKS.
SO I MIGHT NEED TO COME UP WITH, LIKE,
A NEW PLAN OF ATTACK.
- GIRLS, ARE YOU READY TO SWEAT?
- YES.
- I DON'T FEEL PRETTY.
- BUT--[stammering] WHAT'S HAPPENING IS,
UNDERNEATH, YOU'RE GETTING PRETTIER.
- SO I'M WRAPPED UP IN ALUMINUM FOIL,
LIKE A BAKED POTATO.
BUT I HAVE NO CHOICE.
I HAVE TO SACRIFICE MYSELF FOR THIS RIGHT NOW.
I FEEL LIKE I'M A PART OF A SCIENCE PROJECT RIGHT NOW.
- STASSI, THIS IS AN EASY WORKOUT.
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS LAY THERE.
- I FEEL SICK.
LIKE, I JUST FEEL LIKE I WISH KRISTEN
WAS GOING THROUGH THIS RIGHT NOW,
AND KRISTEN HAD TO DO THIS
FOR EIGHT HOURS STRAIGHT.
- [laughs]
- THESE ARE VERY, VERY FULL.
I SHOULD'VE GOTTEN NAPKINS.
- IT'S ALL GOOD.
- I TOLD THEM NO ORANGE FOR YOURS.
- READING THE TEXT MESSAGES ON JAX'S PHONE
REALLY DOES MAKE IT SEEM LIKE
KRISTEN AND JAX DID SLEEP TOGETHER.
BUT THE ONLY WORD THAT MATTERS
TO ME RIGHT NOW IS KRISTEN'S.
- TELL ME ABOUT YOUR FUN DAY YESTERDAY.
- WELL, IT WASN'T THAT FUN. - YEAH.
- IT KINDA SUCKED, ACTUALLY.
- I FIGURED SO MUCH.
- I GOT THERE RIGHT AS, LIKE, JAX WAS LEAVING.
AND, UH, I ASKED TO SEE HIS PHONE.
DID YOU TEXT HIM FROM YOUR PHONE?
- NO. I SHOWED YOU MY PHONE.
- YOU COULD'VE DELETED THEM.
- I UNDERSTAND THAT, BUT NO.
- I DON'T KNOW-- I MEAN, I'VE DOWNLOADED,
LIKE, PROGRAMS AND STUFF,
BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW TO--TO DO THAT.
- I DON'T KNOW. LIKE I SAID,
I'LL FIGURE IT OUT IF I HAVE TO FIGURE IT OUT.
- IT'S JUST REALLY TOUGH,
BECAUSE IT SEEMS LIKE HE WOULD HAVE
TO GO TO A LOT OF TROUBLE
TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
- I AGREE.
- KRISTEN'S CALM.
SHE LOOKS ME IN THE EYE.
SHE JUST SEEMS SO CONVINCING.
- HEY-O.
- PETER--GETTING HIS HAIR STYLED RIGHT NOW.
EVERY YEAR, SUR DOES THESE FABULOUS PHOTO SHOOTS.
- WOW, BEAUTIFUL. PERFECT.
- I GUESS IT'S TO PROMOTE THE RESTAURANT,
BUT IT'S A LOT OF FUN.
- LIKE, I JUST WANNA DO, LIKE, LOTS OF LASHES.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- UH, KIND OF THE MOST FRUSTRATING THING
IN THE WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD.
- WHAT?
- YESTERDAY, I START RECEIVING ALL THESE TEXTS--
LET ME JUST READ THEM-- FROM JAX.
"IF YOU WANTED TO BE WITH ME,
NOTHING WOULD STAND IN MY WAY, NOTHING."
AND THEN I WROTE--
EXCEPT KRISTEN'S ***, RIGHT? - YEAH.
- SO I WROTE, "[bleep] OFF."
- [laughs]
- MORON.
WHAT A PATHETIC LOSER.
IT BLOWS MY MIND.
MEANWHILE, HE'S, LIKE, TWEETING A DIFFERENT GIRL,
"I MISS YOU. I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU."
THEN HE'S TEXTING ME HOW AMAZING I AM.
LIKE, YOU ARE MENTAL.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- READY FOR THE ANNUAL SUR PHOTO SHOOT?
- DUDE, ABSOLUTELY, BRO.
- I FEEL LIKE WE JUST DID THIS LAST YEAR.
- ♪ HOW I MISS HER ♪
♪ MISS HER ♪
♪ MISS HER ♪
[indistinct chatter]
[dramatic music]
♪ ♪
- LISA!
- HELLO.
SO YOU'VE GOTTA SORT THIS HOT MESS OUT, THEN?
- MORE BEAUTIFUL, THOUGH, THIS YEAR.
- TODAY'S PHOTO SHOOT IS GONNA BE POOLSIDE.
KIND OF THE FEELING IS:
THE SUMMER MIGHT BE OVER, BUT IT'S STILL HOT AT SUR.
- PHOTO SHOOT DAY. - ARE YOU EXCITED?
- SO EXCITED.
- KRISTEN'S BEEN ON REALLY THIN ICE.
SHE'S BEEN SUSPENDED FROM HER JOB.
SHE'S GIVEN ME AN ULTIMATUM.
SO SHE'S ACTUALLY BEEN EXCLUDED
FROM THE PHOTO SHOOT THIS YEAR.
IT'S GONNA BE A MUCH EASIER, CALMER DAY
IF KRISTEN IS REMOVED FROM THE SITUATION.
OKAY, GUYS.
- GUYS, COME ON, LET'S GO.
- ARE YOU READY TO WORK SOME MAGIC TODAY?
[techno music]
♪ ♪
- PERFECT.
[indistinct chatter]
- ARE YOU KIDDING ME? NOW?
NOW YOU'RE 45 MINUTES LATE.
YOU'RE NOT IN THE SHOT. LET'S JUST DO THE SHOT.
- PERFECT. OOPS, SORRY.
[shutter clicks]
- OKAY, I'M DONE. NOW DO THEM.
NO, COME ON.
SERIOUSLY, WHY ARE YOU LATE?
WHY ARE YOU LATE?
- [sighs] I DON'T KNOW.
I'M SORRY.
IT WAS HARD TO, LIKE,
GET OUT OF BED THIS MORNING,
BECAUSE I'M TORN UP ABOUT WHAT HAS HAPPENED
WITH THIS JAX-AND-KRISTEN SITUATION.
I DIDN'T SLEEP LAST NIGHT.
- GO AND GET READY.
BUT YOU'RE NOT IN THIS FIRST SHOT.
[shutter clicks]
- I STILL JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT TO BELIEVE.
STASSI RIGHT NOW IS JUST DOWN ON KRISTEN,
AND SHE HAS DECIDED THAT THIS RUMOR IS TRUE.
HEY, CAN--DO YOU MIND IF WE TALK FOR A SECOND?
- YEAH, THAT'S FINE. IF WE HAVE TIME, YEAH.
- I COULD VERY WELL PICTURE STASSI
BORROWING KRISTEN'S PHONE
AND SENDING THESE TEXTS BECAUSE SHE WANTS
EVERYONE ELSE TO BELIEVE IT.
SO I HAVEN'T REALLY TALKED TO YOU
ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT'S GONE DOWN.
LIKE, I WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.
- OKAY, SO DO YOU REALLY WANT ME TO GO INTO DETAILS?
- YEAH. - OKAY.
WELL, THEY HAD SEX.
AND THIS IS THE MOST DISTURBING PART,
IS THAT, LIKE, SHE WAS GETTING LOUD,
AND SHE HAD TO COVER HER MOUTH
THE WHOLE ENTIRE TIME.
WHICH I KNOW [bleep] TURNS JAX ON,
SO DISGUSTING.
AND THEN THEY DID IT AGAIN,
WHEN YOU AND KRISTEN GOT IN A FIGHT,
AND KRISTEN WENT OVER TO JAX'S HOUSE.
- SEE, HE SAID THAT THEY WENT DOWN ON EACH OTHER
AT MY HOUSE OR SOMETHING, I DON'T KNOW.
- HOW ARE YOU EVEN NORMAL RIGHT NOW, THOUGH?
LIKE, DO YOU BELIEVE THIS,
OR DO YOU NOT BELIEVE THIS?
- IT'S SO MIND-BLOWING.
IT'S ONE OF THOSE THINGS, LIKE,
YOU GOTTA UNDERSTAND, STASSI,
I'M NOT GONNA JUST TAKE THE FIRST THING I HEAR
FROM [bleep] JAX--
- JAX LIES TO COVER HIS [bleep].
JAX DOESN'T MAKE UP LIES
TO MAKE HIMSELF LOOK LIKE [bleep].
- I'M JUST SAYING, THE DUDE SAYS THINGS.
- I THINK YOU ARE IN AN INSANE,
HUGE DENIAL RIGHT NOW.
- I'M NOT IN DENIAL, STASSI.
- HOW ARE YOU NOT BROKEN UP WITH HER?
- THAT'S MY DECISION, STASSI.
- YEAH, BUT, TOM, LIKE,
WHY DO YOU THINK I HIT HER [bleep] FACE?
'CAUSE I THINK SHE IS A DISGUSTING, LYING ***.
- I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY TOM HASN'T
SMACKED YOU RIGHT ON THE NOSE.
- YOU WERE A [bleep] BOYFRIEND. YOU DESERVED IT.
SATISFY YOUR GIRLFRIEND, WE WON'T HAVE A PROBLEM.
HOW ABOUT THAT?
- I'M NOT IN DENIAL, STASSI.
- HOW ARE YOU NOT BROKEN UP WITH HER?
- THAT'S MY DECISION, STASSI.
- YEAH, BUT, TOM, LIKE,
WHY DO YOU THINK I HIT HER [bleep] FACE?
'CAUSE I THINK SHE IS A DISGUSTING, LYING ***.
- I MEAN--
IT'S ALSO JAX THAT DID IT TO YOU AS WELL.
- OF COURSE, BUT IT WAS THAT I'M NOT WITH HIM ANY--
- WHY DO YOU HAVE HIM AROUND?
- BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE A CHOICE RIGHT NOW
AND BECAUSE HE TOLD ME THE TRUTH.
- WHO CARES? - IT DOESN'T MATTER.
WE FIGHT THE WHOLE ENTIRE TIME WE'RE TOGETHER.
- THEN WHY HAVE HIM AROUND?
'CAUSE I CAN'T BE AROUND THAT DUDE.
- JAX IS A PIECE OF [bleep]
AND ALWAYS DOES [bleep] THINGS.
AND NOTHING SURPRISES ME.
BUT I TRUSTED KRISTEN-- THAT'S WHAT THIS IS ABOUT.
- WELL, I'VE BEEN FRIENDS WITH JAX FOR TEN YEARS.
- THEN I UNDERSTAND YOU NOT WANTING TO BE AROUND JAX.
BUT THING IS, YOU DON'T BELIEVE IT ABOUT JAX,
SO WHAT THE [bleep] DO YOU CARE?
IT IS ALL LAID OUT RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU.
AND YOU ARE JUST SITTING THERE,
LOOKING FOR ANY LITTLE PIECE... - I'M JUST--
- THAT YOU CAN PICK IN ORDER TO NOT BELIEVE IT.
- I DON'T CARE WHAT OTHER PEOPLE
THINK I SHOULD DO.
I KNOW WHAT I NEED TO DO.
IT'S MY DECISION. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
JUST LIKE IT'S YOUR DECISION WHO YOU WANNA BE WITH.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
IT'S MY DECISION.
- DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO SAY.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO SAY.
I FEEL ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE FOR TOM.
I KNOW HOW THIS MUST FEEL.
BUT HE DOESN'T WANNA BELIEVE IT,
THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO.
- EITHER WAY, HE'S STILL
A [bleep] PIECE OF [bleep].
- PERFECT. [shutter clicks]
- 100%.
YOU HAVE A SUPPORT SYSTEM.
THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE THAT CARE ABOUT YOU HERE.
SO STOP THINKING THAT IT'S, LIKE,
YOU AND KRISTEN AGAINST THE WORLD.
- I FEEL THAT WAY.
- WELL, THAT IS [bleep]-*** TEAM.
OKAY, YEAH, NO,
I NEED TO JUMP INTO THIS BIT.
- ALL RIGHT, THANKS FOR TALKING TO ME.
- YEAH.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- YOU SHOW ME WHAT YOU WANT.
- LIKE THIS. - OH, OKAY.
- AMAZING.
- I HAVEN'T MODELED MUCH LATELY,
BUT YOU NEVER FORGET THE OLD POSES.
- WOW, WOW.
- YOU NEVER WANNA LOOK SMILEY.
YOU WANNA LOOK LIKE YOU'RE ANGRY
OR YOU'RE KIND OF CONFUSED.
ALWAYS LOOK CONFUSED.
SO AGAIN.
- I WANNA SEE YOUR EYES, YOUR EYES.
- I'M NOT FLEXING.
I'M JUST SMOOTHING OUT MY HAIR.
- YOU LOOK AMAZING.
- YEP, MY BACK IS STILL THERE.
- PERFECT.
- WHO'S THAT HANDSOME GUY?
OH, WAIT, THAT'S ME. [chuckles]
- TOM.
[murmuring]
AMAZING.
- THIS IS THE MOST AWKWARD PHOTO SHOOT
I'VE EVER HAD TO DO.
I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON IN HIS HEAD.
- YES, STAND ON THIS,
SO I CAN SEE YOU-- PERFECT.
I WANNA SEE YOUR FACE.
- SURPRISE, SURPRISE.
HERE I AM, TAKING PICTURES WITH JAX.
THE GUY'S [bleep] UNBELIEVABLY EVIL...
- PERFECT.
- AND, BY THE WAY, LOOKS LIKE [bleep].
THOSE [bleep] SUPPLEMENTS, MAN.
- OKAY, DONE.
PERFECT.
- I CAN'T BEGIN TO UNDERSTAND IT,
TO BE HONEST, GUILLERMO.
JAX DOESN'T GIVE A [bleep].
LET ME TELL YOU, HE DOES NOT GIVE A [bleep].
I DON'T KNOW WHY HE'S GOT
NO MORAL CONSCIENCE-- NOTHING.
ONCE AGAIN, JAX MYSTIFIES ME.
TOM IS HIS GOOD FRIEND.
AND THERE HE IS,
ADMITTING TO HAVE SLEPT WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND,
AND HE DOESN'T EXPECT ANY REPERCUSSIONS.
IT'S ACTUALLY QUITE UNFATHOMABLE.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY TOM
HASN'T SMACKED YOU RIGHT ON THE NOSE.
- WELL, YOU BETTER HIT ME, BETTER KNOCK ME OUT.
YOU'RE A [bleep] BOYFRIEND. YOU DESERVED IT.
SATISFY YOUR GIRLFRIEND, WE WON'T HAVE A PROBLEM.
HOW ABOUT THAT?
- HE'S ACTING LIKE HE'S DONE A GOOD THING,
THAT IT WAS A CHARITABLE DONATION TO KRISTEN,
TO HELP THEM OUT.
WELL DONE, JAX. NO.
- I HATE WHEN EVERYONE LOOKS AT ME AND SAYS,
"OH, YOU'RE THE BAD GUY, YOU'RE THE BAD GUY."
HERE'S WHY I DON'T FEEL BAD:
BECAUSE TOM AND KRISTEN'S RELATIONSHIP IS BULL[bleep].
IT'S A GLORIFIED ROOMMATE SITUATION.
- YOU WERE HIS FRIEND.
- MM, FRIEND IS-- YOU CAN USE THAT LOOSELY.
- OKAY, OKAY, OKAY. YOU KNOW WHAT?
LET'S NOT GO DOWN THIS PATH. DO ME A FAVOR.
CAN YOU GO AND GET ME A CUP OF TEA?
- I'M ON THE CLOCK TODAY?
I'M ALWAYS ON THE CLOCK.
- YOU'RE ALWAYS ON SOMETHING, JAX.
- OKAY.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- PERFECTO.
♪ ♪
- WE MUST BE INSANE.
LIKE, ALL OF THIS FOR A PHOTO SHOOT
FOR A RESTAURANT?
I HIGHLY DOUBT THIS IS GOING ON
AT OLIVE GARDEN.
WE WANNA DO A BIG GROUP SUR PHOTO SHOOT,
BUT, LIKE, NAKED.
- ONE, TWO, THREE, NAKED.
WOW, PETER.
- I'M STANDING UP THERE,
NOT AS THEIR MANAGER, BUT AS ONE OF THEM.
NUDITY IS A GREAT EQUALIZER.
- WOW.
- [laughs]
- BE CAREFUL WITH YOUR...
all: AAH.
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
WHAT ARE YOU-- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
- WHOA! - HEY, LISA.
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
WHOSE IDEA?
- STASSI. - WHOSE--
OH, YOU-- - IT WAS MINE.
I'LL TAKE THE BLAME FOR THIS.
- MY GOD, WE NEED TO PHOTOSHOP
THAT LITTLE THING.
CAN WE NOT MAKE THAT ANY BIGGER?
GET DRESSED. - [laughs]
- GET DRESSED!
- LISA, I DO JUST WANNA THANK YOU VERY MUCH
FOR ALLOWING ME TO HAVE
THE ENGAGEMENT PARTY AT SUR TOMORROW.
- I KNOW, YOU OWE ME BIG-TIME.
YOU OWE ME YOUR FIRSTBORN.
- THAT'S FINE.
- THE WAY SCHEANA HAS BEHAVED HAS NOT BEEN PERFECT,
BUT SHE'S WORKED FOR ME FOR YEARS.
SO I THOUGHT SHE DESERVED A TREAT.
- BUT THE THING IS, FOR TOMORROW,
I REALLY WANT TOM THERE.
- WELL, TOM WILL COME, DARLING, JUST ASK HIM.
- I KNOW, I DON'T THINK IT'S A GOOD IDEA
IF KRISTEN SHOWS UP.
- TODAY SHE'S NOT HERE BECAUSE IT'S A WORK THING,
AND I NEED IT ALL TO GO SMOOTHLY.
TOMORROW, IT'S A SOCIAL EVENT.
LISTEN, YOU, MADAM,
I HOPE YOU'VE APOLOGIZED TO KRISTEN.
I TOLD YOU, YOU HAVE TO. YOU HAVE TO.
- WHY WOULD I APOLOGIZE TO SOMEONE WHO--
- BECAUSE YOU WERE WRONG.
- TO MY BEST FRIEND WHO BANGED MY BOYFRIEND?
- FORGET THAT. YOU WERE WRONG.
AS SOON AS YOU SLAPPED HER ON THE FACE,
YOU LOST IT. - SHE DESERVED TO BE SLAPPED
47 MORE TIMES. - IT DOESN'T MATTER.
YOU CAN'T GO AROUND DOING THAT.
YOU HAVE TO GET ON YOUR HANDS AND KNEES
AND ASK FOR HER FORGIVENESS. - [growls]
- STASSI.
- I'M GONNA FOLLOW UP THAT APOLOGY
WITH A CRUCIFIXION.
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN, A CRUCIFIXION?
- I LOST A BATTLE.
I WILL WIN THIS WAR.
- COMING UP...
[all screaming]
- I THINK YOU'RE LYING TO ME.
- I'M NOT LYING TO YOU, TOM!
UGH!
- I NEED TO SEE YOUR LEGS, NOT--
THE KNEES UP TO ME, THIS WAY.
WHERE'S TOM?
YOU, JAX, HERE.
YOU, TOM, HERE.
PERFECT.
TOM, BE--PERFECT.
AND YOU, JAX, NEAR TOM.
- I DON'T THINK I'D PUT JAX TOO CLOSE TO TOM.
[shutter clicks] - PERFECT.
THEY LOOK AMAZING.
- I FEEL SORRY FOR HIM, THOUGH.
HE SEEMS A BIT LIKE NOT HIMSELF, YOU KNOW?
AND IT'S HARD FOR HIM.
HOW WOULD YOU FEEL? - PERFECT.
- HOW WOULD YOU FEEL, REALLY?
[shutter clicks]
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
[indistinct chatter]
[indistinct chatter]
- OKAY, TOM.
IT'S WATER, NOT ***.
THOUGH YOU PROBABLY NEED ***.
- YEAH.
- IF YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK TO ME--
IT'S REALLY NONE OF MY BUSINESS,
BUT...DO YOU BELIEVE IT?
AND SHE'S STILL DENYING IT TO YOU?
WHAT DID SHE SAY, IN REGARD TO THE TEXT?
- SHE E YS IT'S BULL[bleep].
- HOW CAN IT BE BULL[bleep] IF IT CAME FROM HER PHONE?
- WELL, THAT'S THE THING. I COULD ACTUALLY
TEXT YOU AS STASSI FROM MY PHONE.
- DO YOU THINK JAX IS A TELEPHONE WIZ?
HE'S, LIKE, GETTING APPS TO PRETEND
THAT KRISTEN SENT HIM TEXTS?
LET'S BE HONEST HERE, REALLY.
- I KNOW, BUT I KNOW-- - COME ON.
- I KNOW. I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE SAYING.
I DON'T THINK THAT HE DID THAT.
- OKAY, SO WHY EVEN PUT THAT OUT THERE?
- 'CAUSE IT IS POSSIBLE.
- A LOT OF THINGS ARE POSSIBLE.
IT SEEMS OBVIOUS TO EVERYONE THAT THIS IS TRUE,
BUT TOM SEEMS ABSOLUTELY AT A LOSS.
HE JUST DOESN'T KNOW WHAT'S TRUE AND WHAT'S NOT.
IT'S HEARTBREAKING TO WATCH.
- IT'S JUST SO HARD FOR ME TO BE AROUND EVERYONE,
WHEN IT'S, LIKE, JAX DOES THIS AND HE, LIKE, HAS NO REMORSE.
HE'S, LIKE-- - HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY REMORSE.
THAT'S JAX.
- I KNOW, BUT EVERYBODY THINKS IT'S--
LIKE, IT'S OKAY, IT'S FINE.
- OH, I DON'T THINK THEY DO--
I DON'T THINK THEY THINK IT'S OKAY.
EVERYBODY GETS THEIR DAY.
TOM AND KRISTEN MIGHT NOT
HAVE THE PERFECT RELATIONSHIP,
BUT IT'S STILL A RELATIONSHIP.
AND JAX HAS NO RESPECT FOR THAT.
WELL, NOR DOES KRISTEN.
WHO ARE YOU MORE LET DOWN BY?
ARE YOU MORE LET DOWN BY JAX OR KRISTEN?
'CAUSE YOU KEEP SAYING,
"I'M UPSET WITH JAX. AND HOW COULD YOU--"
BUT YOU'RE NEVER MENTIONING KRISTEN.
DOESN'T SHE HAVE ONE IOTA OF RESPONSIBILITY HERE?
SHE HASN'T EVEN ADMITTED IT.
ISN'T IT ALMOST BETTER THAT JAX IS BEING HONEST?
- [crying] I LITERALLY JUST WANNA, LIKE,
HIDE UNDER MY COVERS AND JUST PRETEND, LIKE, JUST--
- PRETEND WHAT? - THIS DIDN'T HAPPEN, YOU KNOW?
JUST PRETEND, LIKE, THAT--
- IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE DOING?
- NO, I DON'T KNOW.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE [bleep] TO DO.
- SHE'S LYING TO YOU.
RIGHT? YOU KNOW THAT.
- YEAH.
- DEAL WITH IT.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT HIM.
HE DOESN'T GIVE A [bleep] ABOUT YOU.
I'D BE MORE CONCERNED ABOUT THE WOMAN
THAT YOU'RE IN BED WITH EVERY NIGHT.
YOU NEED KRISTEN TO BE HONEST.
COME ON, TOM.
- YEAH.
- ONE, TWO, THREE.
[shutter clicks] PERFECT.
SEXY, GIGGY.
AND THE LAST ONE.
[shutter clicks] YES, GREAT.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
[cheers and applause]
- EVERYBODY, I JUST WANNA SAY
THAT I AM DOING THIS--
IT'S NOT FOR ME, IT'S JUST FOR ALL OF YOU.
[all screaming]
[upbeat music]
[cheers and applause]
[laughter]
EVERYBODY HAVE A DRINK.
[indistinct chatter]
[laughter]
[all cheering]
[upbeat music]
- ♪ THE WAIT IS OVER ♪
♪ NOW IT'S REALLY GOING DOWN ♪
- DO YOU WANNA DO A BET? - NO.
- HOW LONG IT'LL BE UNTIL, LIKE--
UNTIL I GET A DRINK THROWN IN MY FACE?
IT WAS A JOKE.
I'M TRYING TO MAKE LIGHT OF THIS
AMAZING SITUATION I'M ABOUT TO WALK INTO TONIGHT.
- I KNOW, STASSI, KATIE...
- MY BIGGEST CONCERN IS TALKING TO LISA.
BUT I'M JUST GONNA BE HONEST WITH HER AND JUST...
TELL HER HOW I FEEL ABOUT EVERYTHING
AND KINDA SEE WHAT SHE SAYS.
HOW WAS YESTERDAY, THE PHOTO SHOOT?
- IT WAS--
- EVERYTHING YOU WISHED IT WOULD BE AND MORE?
- NO, NOT REALLY.
I TALKED TO LISA.
- ON WHAT--FIRING ME?
- I TALKED TO STASSI TOO.
- AND?
- I MEAN, SHE WENT INTO MORE DETAILS
THAN JAX INITIALLY DID.
- I HAVEN'T TEXTED HIM OR ANYONE ELSE OR--
- BUT, KRISTEN, THE THING IS,
IS, LIKE, I'VE TRIED EVERY WAY POSSIBLE TO,
LIKE, SEE HOW TO FAKE THOSE TEXT MESSAGES.
THOSE TEXT MESSAGES CAME FROM YOUR PHONE.
AND I NEED YOU TO BE HONEST WITH ME ABOUT THAT.
- I'M BEING [bleep] HONEST WITH YOU.
WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME?
- I THINK YOU'RE LYING TO ME.
- HEY, WELL, I'M NOT.
THINGS ARE REALLY TOUGH FOR TOM RIGHT NOW.
HE HAS HIS DOUBTS.
BUT I WOULD LIKE HIM TO THINK THAT MY WORD
IS A LITTLE MORE PURE THAN JAX TAYLOR'S.
- THESE TEXT MESSAGES... - WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?
- CAME FROM YOUR PHONE! - WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?
- I WANT YOU TO ADMIT IT.
- SO, OH, YOU WANT ME TO JUST TELL EVERYONE,
LIKE, "I [bleep] JAX."
- NO, I WANT YOU TO ADMIT IT TO ME.
- I'M NOT LYING TO YOU, TOM!
- KRISTEN, I JUST KNOW HOW YOU ACT
WHEN YOU'VE DONE THIS IN THE PAST.
I KNOW YOUR BEHAVIOR. - UGH!
- I KNOW THIS [bleep] IS [bleep] TRUE,
AND IF YOU WANT US TO [bleep] MOVE ON,
YOU NEED TO TELL ME, KRISTEN.
- NO. - THAT'S WHAT I'M ASKING FOR.
- IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME, THEN THIS IS OVER.
- YOU'RE RIGHT.
- YOU'RE GONNA LET THIS END US?
- I MEAN, KRISTEN, LIKE, IF YOU CAN'T BE,
LIKE, HONEST, LIKE...
- I HOPE THAT PIECE OF [bleep] BURNS IN HELL.
- COMING UP...
- ♪ BECAUSE WE'RE GOOD AS GOLD ♪
♪ ♪
♪ BECAUSE WE'RE GOOD AS GOLD ♪
- IF YOU QUIT, YOU'RE DOING ME A FAVOR.
- I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU IN A WEDDING DRESS.
- DUDE, THIS IS SO WEIRD.
- SO WHY DON'T YOU LADIES START TO LOOK THROUGH
A LITTLE BIT? - OKAY.
- OH, YEAH, I DO-- - I LIKE THE BUTTONS.
THIS IS CHIC.
I HAVE TO HAVE THE PERFECT WEDDING DRESS.
- THIS ONE RIGHT BEHIND YOU IS A GORGEOUS LAZARO.
IT'S AN $8,000 DRESS. - HOLY CRAP.
LOVE THAT, CAN'T AFFORD IT.
I'M ON A WAITRESS BUDGET.
OKAY, LET'S TRY THIS ONE ON.
- OH, WOW.
- I LIKE THAT.
- OH, MY GOD. [laughs]
- THIS IS A $10,000 DRESS. - IT IS.
- SOMETHING MORE FITTED, A LITTLE MORE SEXY.
- OH, MY GOSH, SCHEANA, THAT LOOKS SO GOOD.
- I THINK NOW, SEEING YOU IN THIS,
YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING THAT SHOWS YOUR BODY OFF.
- ABSOLUTELY. CAN I *** POP IN IT?
- WELL, THEY CAN ADD AN ELASTIC PIECE.
[laughter]
- I WANT A SEXY YET CLASSY DRESS
THAT I CAN TOTALLY TWERK AND *** POP IN.
AHH, I'M GETTING MARRIED.
[laughter]
OH, MY GOD.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- ♪ I DON'T SEE NO COMPETITION ♪
♪ ALL THESE OTHER SNITCHES ♪
- HEY!
TONIGHT IS MY ENGAGEMENT PARTY.
I DON'T MEAN TO JEER. I'M ENGAGED.
- THIS IS MY LAST CELEBRATION.
I'M, LIKE, SCREWED NOW.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- HELLO. - HELLO.
OH, YOU LOOK GORGEOUS. - THANK YOU.
- WELL, CONGRATULATIONS. - THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
- THEY ARE, LIKE, SERIOUS STORM CLOUDS
HANGING OVER SUR THESE DAYS.
SO, I FEEL LIKE SCHEANA'S ENGAGEMENT PARTY
IS, LIKE, THE ONE GOOD THING
THAT'S GOING ON RIGHT NOW.
- OOH, THAT'S HOT.
I WANNA BORROW.
- CHEERS. - HAVE YOU TRIED IT?
- I HAVE NOT. - MWAH.
YES, THAT'S RIGHT, YEAH.
- THANK YOU.
I FEEL LIKE I'VE PRETTY MUCH BEEN ON, LIKE,
A THREE-YEAR MARCH TO THIS PARTY.
I HAVE BEEN PLANNING IT.
PRETTY MUCH SINCE THE DAY WE STARTED DATING,
I KNEW SHAY WAS THE ONE, AND I'M SO EXCITED.
IT'S MY PARTY.
I'M ENGAGED.
- I'M KRISTINA.
IT'S SO NICE TO MEET YOU. - NICE TO MEET YOU.
- I NEED TO TALK TO YOU.
- I'M NOT WORKING RIGHT NOW.
- BEFORE YOU HAVE A DRINK, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU.
SIT DOWN.
LISTEN. I DON'T KNOW IF KRISTEN'S COMING TONIGHT.
BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHER, YOU HAVE TO APOLOGIZE.
WHAT YOU DID WAS WRONG, OKAY?
I DON'T CARE WHAT KRISTEN HAS DONE.
YOU SLAP SOMEBODY, YOU'RE IN THE WRONG.
SO AS SOON AS YOU SEE HER, I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO,
YOU GO UP TO HER, AND YOU APOLOGIZE.
- WELL, HOW DO I GO ABOUT THIS, EXACTLY?
IF SHE SHOWS UP AT A PARTY, DO I JUST INSTANTLY JUST--
- IF YOU'RE SMART ENOUGH TO SLAP HER,
THEN YOU'RE SMART ENOUGH TO FIGURE IT OUT.
- THIS IS GONNA SUCK.
- GO ON THEN. GO AND HAVE FUN.
- OKAY.
- STASSI'S DEFINITELY GROWING UP.
I THINK NOW SHE'S KIND OF LEARNING
TO TRY AND SEPARATE HER EMOTIONAL
AND HER PROFESSIONAL LIFE,
WHICH IS, YOU KNOW, A SIGN OF MATURITY.
- CAN YOU HELP ME WITH SOMETHING REALLY QUICK?
BE RIGHT BACK.
- FROM WHAT I'VE BEEN TOLD... - OH, GOD.
- THAT SCHEANA INVITED TOM AND KRISTEN.
- KRISTEN MIGHT NOT SHOW UP, SO DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
- GUYS, BRING YOUR DRINKS.
- EXCITED! - YOU SHOULD GET UP
ON THE BAR AND DANCE WITH ME.
- I'M GONNA KILL MYSELF IF I DO THAT,
BECAUSE MY HEELS ARE, LIKE, SEVEN-INCH HIGH.
- [deep breath]
- WE'RE GONNA HAVE A LITTLE SURPRISE
IN THE LOUNGE. - OH, WOW.
[indistinct chatter]
- I JUST WANT TO THANK ALL OF MY FRIENDS
AND EVERYONE ELSE WHO IS HERE
AT SUR TONIGHT FOR COMING.
SHAY AND I ARE SO HAPPY TO BE ABLE
TO SHARE THIS NIGHT WITH EVERYBODY.
[cheers and applause]
- I'M LIKE, "OH, GOD."
I ALREADY HAVE "***-BUMPS."
- I'M DEBUTING MY NEW SONG.
IT'S CALLED GOOD AS GOLD.
AND I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY IT.
- I KNEW EXACTLY WHAT WAS COMING.
SHE'S NOT GONNA WASTE AN OPPORTUNITY
WITH AN AUDIENCE TO DEBUT HER SINGLE.
[cheers and applause]
[Scheana Marie's Good as Gold]
- TURN IT UP.
♪ ♪
- ♪ I'LL OPEN PANDORA'S BOX FOR YA ♪
♪ I'LL BRING THE ROCK FOR YA ♪
♪ WE'RE GONNA OWN THE NIGHT ♪
♪ HOW ABOUT WE ALL GO DOWN SWINGING ♪
♪ FEET TO THE GROUND SINGING ♪
♪ THIS BEAT MAKES ME COME ALIVE ♪
♪ BECAUSE WE'RE GOOD AS GOLD ♪
- I HAVE TO GIVE SCHEANA SOME CREDIT.
I ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE THIS GOLD SONG.
LIKE, IT'S CATCHY.
LIKE, I WOULD EVEN DOWNLOAD IT.
I MEAN, ONLY ILLEGALLY. BUT, YOU KNOW, I WOULD.
- ♪ I GOTTA TELL YOU ♪
♪ I'M FEELING GOOD ♪
♪ THIS PARTY'S GOT ME ALL CHARGED UP ♪
IT'S FUN TO JUST BE UP HERE DANCING.
I THINK MY VOICE IS ON POINT.
I MEAN, IF SHAY AND I COULD GET ENGAGED,
LIKE, EVERY MONTH AND HAVE PARTIES LIKE THIS,
IT'D BE AWESOME.
♪ BECAUSE WE'RE GOOD AS GOLD ♪
♪ BECAUSE WE'RE GOOD AS GOLD, BABY ♪
♪ GOOD AS GOLD ♪
[cheers and applause]
- A COUPLE MONTHS AGO, I TOLD SCHEANA AT HER BIRTHDAY
THAT SHE DIDN'T HAVE A SINGING CAREER.
I DON'T KNOW IF SHE HAS THE SINGING CAREER YET,
BUT I'M SEEING THAT HE HAS
MORE POTENTIAL TO HAVE ONE.
- OKAY, EVERYBODY, BACK TO THE GARDEN.
LET'S DRINK.
[laughter]
- HI, LISA. - HEY.
- HOW YOU DOING? - I'M GOOD.
- THANKS!
WHAT IS THIS?
I MEAN, KRISTEN HAS SOME BIG BALLS TO SHOW UP.
THANK YOU SO MUCH. - YES.
- I MEAN, IF KRISTEN HAS TO SHOW UP,
AT LEAST SHE HAS A TRIPLE DECKER PINK PRESENT FOR ME.
- IF I COULD TALK TO YOU OUTSIDE, OUT FRONT,
YOU'RE WELCOME TO COME.
- OKAY.
- I WOULD PREFER NOT TO EVER SEE KRISTEN AGAIN,
BUT IT'S NOT MY ENGAGEMENT PARTY.
I HAVE TO APOLOGIZE TO KRISTEN
FOR THE ACT OF MY HAND
COMING IN CONTACT WITH HER FACE.
- LET'S GRAB A SEAT.
- I CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT YOU IN THE EYE.
- I CAN'T EVEN CRY OVER YOU ANYMORE, KRISTEN.
- AND YOU DON'T DESERVE TO.
I CAN'T LOOK YOU IN THE EYE,
BECAUSE I [bleep] LIED TO YOUR FACE.
YES, I DID HAVE SEX WITH HIM ONE TIME.
AND I'M REALLY SORRY-- - SO YOU HAD SEX WITH JAX?
- YES.
- HOLY [bleep].
AFTER MONTHS OF THIS DRAMA...
- EVEN IF YOU AND I WERE NOT FRIENDS,
I WOULD NEVER [bleep] JAX WITH A 10-FOOT POLE--NO OFFENSE.
- KRISTEN, I MEAN, PINKY-- - SERIOUSLY LIKE REALLY GROSS.
- LIKE, HAND TO GOD... - ARE YOU [bleep] ME?
- ON MY LIFE, STASSI'S LIFE, YOU DIDN'T?
- AND MY NIECE AND NEPHEWS AND MY MOTHER
AND MY DEAD GRANDMOTHER. - NEVER, EVER?
- THAT'S REALLY GROSS, KRISTINA.
THAT'S DISGUSTING.
- YOU BANGED HIM!
- I NEVER BANGED [bleep] JAX.
- I NEVER THOUGHT THAT THIS MOMENT WOULD COME.
I, HONEST TO GOD, RIGHT NOW AM SO SHOCKED
THAT YOU JUST ADMITTED IT, THAT I-I--
- I LIED TO YOU, I LIED TO HIM,
I LIED TO EVERYONE. - IT'S NOT EVEN ABOUT LYING.
YOU [bleep] MY EX-BOYFRIEND AND CHEATED ON YOUR BOYFRIEND.
ARE YOU KIDDING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
- EVERYTHING. [crying]
I HAVE NO ONE TO BLAME BUT MYSELF.
WHEN I SLEPT WITH JAX,
I BETRAYED EVERYONE I CARED ABOUT,
I LOST ALL OF MY BEST FRIENDS.
AND YEAH, I'M SUFFERING FOR IT.
- YOU HAVE SAT THERE FOR MONTHS,
MAKING ME FEEL BAD FOR YOU.
- SHE CAN'T MAKE YOU FEEL ANY BAD.
- SANDOVAL, NO. ARE YOU DEFENDING
YOUR GIRLFRIEND WHO CHEATED ON YOU
WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND?
ARE YOU DEFENDING HER?
SHE JUST SAID, "I HAD SEX WITH JAX."
DID YOU NOT HEAR HER? - SHE JUST TOLD ME.
BEFORE WE LEFT FOR THE PARTY,
KRISTEN WORE DOWN AND TOLD ME
THAT HER AND JAX DID, IN FACT, HAVE SEX.
- I SAT THERE FOR YOU
WHILE YOU CRIED AND SOBBED
THAT TOM MADE OUT WITH ARIANA
LIKE IT WAS THE END OF THE WORLD
WHEN YOU HAD [bleep] MY EX-BOYFRIEND,
WHO WAS TRYING TO GET BACK TOGETHER WITH ME,
WHO IS YOUR BOYFRIEND'S BEST FRIEND.
- YOU'RE GIVING KRISTEN [bleep]...
- SHE [bleep] MY EX-BOYFRIEND... - HAVING NO PROBLEM--
- AND YOUR BEST FRIEND. WHAT IS--LOOK AT YOU!
- NO, BUT I'M-- - LOOK AT YOU!
- NO, BUT LOOK AT YOU! - YOU ARE YELLING AT ME
WHEN YOUR GIRLFRIEND [bleep] YOUR BEST FRIEND.
- NO [bleep], STASSI.
- WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
- I JUST KNOW THAT IT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE
FOR HER TO FACE THIS ALONE.
SO ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS JUST
BEING THERE FOR HER,
EVEN AS [bleep] UP AS THAT SOUNDS.
- YOU HAVE [bleep] PROBLEMS.
- BECAUSE YOU ARE ACTING LIKE
YOU ARE THE BIGGEST VICTIM
IN THIS WHOLE [bleep] ISSUE.
THAT'S MY PROBLEM, STASSI.
- I HIT HER FOR A [bleep] REASON.
SHE [bleep] MY EX-BOYFRIEND
WHO WAS STILL TRYING TO GET BACK TOGETHER WITH ME.
- YOU'RE MAKING IT LIKE THAT YOU
ARE, LIKE, "OH, MY GOD." - YOU KNOW WHAT?
THEN I'LL WALK AWAY AND LET THIS BE ABOUT YOU.
THAT WAS CLASSY, TOM.
IF THIS DOESN'T BREAK A COUPLE UP,
THEY'RE NEVER GONNA BREAK UP.
THEY ARE JUST LOCKING THEMSELVES TO EACH OTHER,
IN A REALLY DARK, LONELY, SAD PLACE.
- [whimpering]
- WHAT HAPPENED?
- SHE ADMITTED IT.
- SHE ADMITTED IT?
- WHAT?
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE ADMITTED IT?
- RIGHT--RIGHT OFF THE BAT ADMITTED IT.
DIDN'T EVEN LET ME ACTUALLY SAY A WORD.
DIDN'T EVEN LET ME SAY A [bleep]--
- WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WHAT DID SHE SAY?
- I FEEL SO [bleep] CONFUSED RIGHT NOW, BECAUSE THAT--
- WHAT DID SHE SAY? - SHE GOES,
"I CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT YOU RIGHT NOW."
AND I GO, "NO, I CAN'T LOOK AT YOU RIGHT NOW."
I WAS FULLY PREPARED TO BE LIKE,
"I AM SO SORRY FOR HITTING YOU."
AND THEN SHE GOES, "I HAD SEX WITH JAX."
- [gasps]
SHE ADMITTED IT?
- WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT'S THE MATTER?
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
- OH, KRISTEN JUST ADMITTED TO
HAVING SEX WITH YOU.
- WAIT, WHAT?
- JAX, COME HERE.
DON'T WORRY, NOTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN.
IT'S OKAY, COME ON.
- I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT ANYTHING HAPPENING.
I DON'T CARE.
- I JUST WANNA KNOW, MAN,
LIKE, I FEEL LIKE I REALLY, LIKE,
REALLY HAVE BEEN A FRIEND TO YOU, MAN.
LIKE, I FEEL LIKE I'VE, LIKE, KINDA, LIKE--
LIKE, REALLY CARED ABOUT YOU.
IT MAKES ME SAD AT TIMES.
LIKE, I'VE ALWAYS JUST ACCEPTED YOU.
HOW DO YOU NOT FEEL ANY REMORSE?
- I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GONE DOWN.
YOU WANNA TELL ME ABOUT IT?
- I LIED ABOUT JAX.
I DID SLEEP WITH JAX A LONG TIME AGO.
[sniffles]
- I'M NOT CONCERNED ABOUT ALL THAT.
BUT I'M VERY CONCERNED ABOUT THE DYNAMICS
IN THIS RESTAURANT.
YOU HAD A RELATIONSHIP WITH A GUY THAT LOVED YOU.
YOU HAD A JOB, YOU HAD FRIENDS.
AND YOU HAVE CREATED ALL THIS [bleep].
AND THEN YOU'VE LIED TO EVERYBODY
TO TRY AND COVER IT UP.
I'M SO UPSET WITH HER.
THERE'S THIS DEEP FEELING
OF JUST REAL DISGUST BY HER ACTIONS.
- I READ, LIKE, THE TEXT MESSAGES
BETWEEN YOU GUYS.
I FEEL LIKE I GOT JAX'D.
I FEEL LIKE I GOT PREYED ON,
LIKE, WHAT YOU WOULD DO TO OTHER GUYS
THAT, LIKE, WE DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT.
- I COULD SIT HERE AND GIVE YOU SOME BULL[bleep] STORY,
BUT IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?
- NO, JAX, I'M JUST ASKING YOU.
- WHAT DO YOU WANT? I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.
- I'M ASKING YOU, STRAIGHT POINT, LIKE,
YOU DON'T SEEM LIKE YOU HAVE ANY REMORSE.
'CAUSE I WOULD [bleep] FEEL HORRIBLE.
- I'M OKAY.
IT DOESN'T BOTHER ME.
- THAT'S [bleep] CREEPY.
- TOM AND KRISTEN'S RELATIONSHIP IS BULL[bleep].
LIKE, YOU DON'T PINE FOR HER.
SO, YOU KNOW WHAT? SHE'S GOTTA GET LAID.
SO DO I.
I SLEEP GOOD AT NIGHT, SO I'M OKAY.
- ALL RIGHT, MAN.
- I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO TELL YOU.
- DO YOU THINK, HONESTLY, YOU CAN WORK HERE ANYMORE?
- [crying] I DO.
- I DON'T THINK RIGHT NOW YOU BELONG HERE ANYMORE.
I'M TELLING YOU THE TRUTH.
- IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?
- IF YOU QUIT, YOU'RE DOING ME A FAVOR.
- SHE ADMITTED IT? - YEAH.
[indistinct chatter]
WHAT DO I DO, MAN?
- SHE LET YOU MAKE A [bleep] *** OF YOURSELF,
AND NOW SHE ADMITS IT?
I DON'T THINK I CAN EVER FORGIVE HER FOR THAT.
I'M JUST SO SORRY THAT THIS ALL HAD TO HAPPEN,
THE WAY IT WENT DOWN, THE WAY YOU WERE CONFRONTED,
LIKE, IN A GROUP SETTING, AND I'M SO SORRY.
- CAN YOU IMAGINE HAVING TO LOOK JAX
IN THE EYES, AND BE LIKE,
"DUDE, LIKE, WE'VE BEEN THERE FOR YOU."
LIKE, DUDE, ME AND YOU HAVE BEEN THERE FOR HIM.
- I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW.
- HE FEELS NOTHING.
- I WOULD BE MORE PISSED AT KRISTEN.
IT'S SO WEIRD.
THEY'RE MAD AT EVERYONE ELSE BUT EACH OTHER.
I MEAN, HOW COULD YOU STAY WITH SOMEONE AFTER THAT?
- DUDE, JAX IS, LIKE, COLD-BLOODED, MAN.
AT SOME POINT, IT'S GONNA BLOW UP.
IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME.
[chuckles] DUDE, I-I'M SORRY, MAN.
- NO, I KNOW, I KNOW. - I FEEL LIKE--
- I KNOW, I KNOW. - YOU GONNA GO TALK TO HER?
- I GOT SOMETHING TO DO FIRST.
- OH, GOD, I'M SCARED.
DON'T DO ANYTHING CRAZY, DUDE.
- OKAY, WHATEVER YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, STOP.
- [scoffs]
THAT'S, LIKE, IMPOSSIBLE.
- CHEERS TO YOU, DARLING. - THANK YOU.
- YES, CHEERS TO YOU. - CHEERS.
- KRISTEN, WHY ARE YOU HERE RIGHT NOW?
- WAIT, I WANNA ASK A VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION.
ARE WE, LIKE, GUESTS HERE?
ARE WE PATRONS? ARE WE WORKING?
- DO YOU HAVE A TRAY IN YOUR HAND?
OKAY, CUT THE BULL[bleep].
ANYWAY, CHEERS TO YOU, SCHEANA.
- THANK YOU.
all: CHEERS.
- CONGRATULATIONS. - THANKS.
THIS IS THE MOST AWKWARD CHEERS OF MY LIFE.
- COMING UP...
[all screaming]
- [crying] - COME ON.
[tense music]
♪ ♪
- OKAY, I'M GOING HOME.
I SUGGEST YOU ALL DO TOO.
COME ON, LET'S GO.
♪ ♪
- JAX.
- WE ALREADY HAD A CONVERSATION.
WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW? - NO, I KNOW.
I'M JUST WONDERING, LIKE, YOU DON'T EVER,
LIKE, FEEL ANYTHING.
IT'S, LIKE, NUTS. - WE HAD THIS CONVERSATION.
- DID YOU EVER FEEL THIS?
- OH, MY GOD! OH, MY GOD!
[all screaming]
- AAH!
[indistinct screaming]
- YEAH, BABY!
- WHY ARE YOU [bleep] SMILING?
- ARE YOU [bleep] KIDDING ME?
- ARE YOU THAT SICK THAT YOU'RE SMILING?
- ARE YOU [bleep] KIDDING ME?
- SCHEANA. - IT'S OKAY,
IT'S OKAY, IT'S OKAY.
- WHY DID YOU DO THAT? - STOP!
- JAX, JAX, JAX--
[overlapping arguing] - LET'S GO!
JUST HIT ME WHEN I'M READY,
YOU [bleep]. - YOU PIECE OF [bleep].
- GO [bleep] SOME MORE BARTENDERS!
- OH, [bleep] YOU!
- YOU CAME TWICE, SWEETHEART.
- I JUST GOT MY TEETH FIXED TODAY.
I HAVE MY SURGERY NEXT WEEK--
- STOP IT.
- THEY KNOCKED ME OVER!
THEY KNOCKED ME OVER.
- I HAVE TO SAY, I WASN'T SURPRISED
BY WHAT TOM DID TO JAX.
THERE'S NOT ONE PART OF ME THAT CONDONES IT,
BUT THERE'S EVERY PART OF ME THAT UNDERSTANDS IT.
HEY, CAN YOU NOW SHUT UP?
- YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
- DO YOU NEED A PLASTIC SURGEON?
- [murmuring] [bleep].
- A LITTLE BIT MORE PARTICULAR
WHERE YOU STICK YOUR ***, THANK YOU.
- I'M NOT-- NO, I'M NOT ABOUT IT.
- JAX, YOU DESERVED IT.
YOU WERE AN [bleep]HOLE. YOU DESERVED IT, OKAY?
- I JUST WISH I WOULD'VE GOT A HIT BACK.
- OKAY, PUT THAT ONE THERE AS WELL.
SHUT UP.
[indistinct chatter]
- SLEEPING WITH KRISTEN WAS DEFINITELY
THE FINAL NAIL ON THE COFFIN.
I MEAN, THERE'S NO COMING BACK FROM THAT.
AND I'M OKAY WITH THAT.
- I FEEL LIKE A REALLY GOOD PERSON.
MY EX-BOYFRIEND [bleep] MY BEST FRIEND.
I'VE BEEN CHEATED ON A THOUSAND TIMES.
WHAT THE [bleep]?
WHEN ARE GOOD PEOPLE GONNA COME OUT ON TOP?
IT FEELS LIKE THE END OF AN ERA.
A HUGE CHAPTER OF MY LIFE JUST CAME TO THE END.
IF IT'S ONE THING I'VE LEARNED
FROM ALL OF THE CRAZINESS,
IT'S THAT I'M NOT GOING TO DEAL WITH
ANYONE'S BULL[bleep] OR LIES EVER AGAIN.
- LET'S HAVE A DRINK.
IT'S BEEN A CRAZY YEAR.
AND I HOPE THESE KIDS
CAN KIND OF PICK UP THE PIECES
AND GO FORWARD AND LEARN
THAT THEIR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES.
[dramatic, sweeping music]
♪ ♪
TO SEE MORE OF VANDERPUMP RULES,
GO TO BRAVOTV.COM.