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ly: I wasn't one of those kids who thrived in high school. I was kind of geeky. All right, I was very geeky. Plus, I had the unfortunate nickname of "Pits" due to the severe case of flop sweats I got during debate club finals, the one and only time I was onstage in front of the whole school. So, yeah, high school was rough. But you know what got me through? The knowledge that I would outgrow all those feelings of insecurity and inadequacy and, at some point, I'd blossom into the secure, confident, kick-*** person I was always meant to be. What are you looking at, loser? I'm not a loser. I I was just thinking about high school and You look like a loser. No, I don't. Oh, is it the shoes? 'cause these are work shoes. It's not the shoes. Then what? It's just you. What does that mean? No! Don't roll your eyes at me! Hey, why do I look like a loser? Hey! Oh, 'cause you're so cool with, like, your orange backpack and homework a-- I'm I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm a little on edge. I'm sorry. So, yeah. I'm still kind of waiting for that confident, kick-*** thing to happen. Remember the basics Airway, breathing, circulation, look for pulse, compressions, i.v., O2, monitor, stable v-tach, amiodarone, 150 milligrams, i.v., compressions. Stop. You know it. You can do this Dr. Owens. Hey-Ey Hey-Ey, Hey-Ey-Ey Hey-Ey Emily? Oh, Will! Hi. Take it down a notch, Emily. Hey, there. Sorry. I'm a little overexcited. It's like first-day-of-school jitters. Mm. Not like we're in school anymore. I wouldn't be so sure. I hear hospitals are a lot like high schools. We're freshmen all over again. Ugh. Please don't say that. So, where do we go? Oh. I'm so glad we're both interning at Denver. How could I turn down the chance to breathe the same air as Gina Bandari? The woman pioneered the percutaneous valve replacement. Not to mention the fact that you're here. I'm just happy to see a friendly face. Okay, he's touching you. Do not spaz out. - You all right? - Yeah. So, uh Cold. You totally spazzed out. Listen, I hear this place is pretty cutthroat, so we're gonna have to stick together, okay? You seem like you're in a really good mood today. Yeah. It's funny. I've been in school for 23 years straight, and I finally feel like I'm entering the next phase of my life. Pits? No. No, no, no. No. No. Don't you recognize me? Do I recognize you?! You hid my clothes after gym class. You prank-called my house. You t.p.'d my car. You were my tormentor, my nemesis, the girl I debated against in those fateful debate club finals. I'm so bad with names. Cassandra Kopelson, from high school. Cassandra Kopelson, from high school. Yeah. So, how in the world did you end up in Denver? Gina Bandari. Woman's a genius. First person to perform a percutaneous valve replacement. Yeah, that's why Emily's here, too. Oh. And you are? Will Collins. Nice to meet you. You too. So, tell me, Will Collins, how do you know Pits? Emily. Well, we went to, uh, med school together. - So, yeah, what's with "Pits"? - That was her nickname in high school. Really? Where'd it come from? You know, I can't remember. Me neither. That's why I go by Emily. Or "Em," sometimes "Emme." Oh, let's go. We don't want to get off on the wrong foot. I hear this place is cutthroat. I literally just said that. Great minds. Whoa That seemed awkward. Oh. Yeah. I thought I left high school behind. Hilarious. A hospital is totally like high school. That's the second time I've heard that today. Because it's true. Look, you got your jocks aka, the orthopedic surgeons. The mean girls go into plastics. Your all-american-girl-next-door types are gonna be in O.B. The true geeks They're the neurologists. The rebels are in the E.R. The stoners anesthesia. And peds gets your sanctimonious churchgoers. How about us? Surgery's a melting pot. Little bit of everything, which basically means none of us get along. This is the first day. How do you know so much? I'm the principal's kid. Aka the chief of staff's daughter. - Tim Dupre's your dad? - Yeah. Don't think I have a familial advantage. Dad's not so into me. He wanted a son. Got a lesbian. It's not the same thing. FYI, he's gonna act nice, tell you he wants to be your friend, but he doesn't. That's just the way he ferrets out the weak ones. Never show weakness. I want you to think of me not only as a boss, but as a friend. If each one of you does not fulfill your potential, I consider that a failure on my part. And I do not like to fail. Dad tends toward the grandiose. Prepare yourself. They say that doctors have god complexes. Do you know why? Because we are gods. Each and every day, we perform miracles. Welcome to Denver Memorial. Now, I would like to introduce you to your resident, Dr. Micah Barnes, and, of course, your attending, Dr. Gina Bandari. You may have heard she pioneered the percutaneous valve replacement. Dr. Bandari, they're all yours. We're walking. Your job is to keep my patients alive. Any issues you have, you bring them to Micah. Micah brings it to me. You and I, we don't talk unless absolutely necessary, which I sincerely hope isn't the case. Don't even think about asking me when you'll be in an O.R. Not for a while. Each of you has a pager. That is your lifeline. As surgeons, you will encounter everything, so your job as interns is to get familiar with everything. In the course of a day, you will be paged by many different doctors in many different specialties. When you're paged, you have 60 seconds to appear, and, yes, I have a timer. Breathe. Was it that obvious? I'm a doctor. Julia was admitted yesterday after she fainted for the second time in gym class. Present. The patient sustained contusions to face and head and was admitted for syncope workup and headache. Medicine is all about the little details. You have to pay attention to everything, like that tiny nick on his jaw, most likely a result of an overzealous razor. Man, he has a nice jaw, the kind of jaw you'd want to caress, if "caress" wasn't such an ooky word, although it does suit him Caress, caress, caress, caress Dr. Owens, what is the prognosis? Um, etiology of syncope likely to be vasovagal. Your body overreacted to something stressful, causing a sudden drop in your heart rate and blood pressure. It's hrmless. Direct your answers to me. And you are correct. Congratulations, Dr. Owens. You have earned a special assignment. You're in charge of discharge paperwork. Thanks for explaining. I never understand what she's talking about. Oh, of course. Okay. So, your discharge instructions are a little complicated. Are you ready? Don't faint anymore. You're gonna be just fine, Julia. But what if I pass out again in front of Cody? - Is that a boy you like? - Yeah. I see him in gym class, my heart races. Ah. Hence the fainting. I totally get it, though That heart-racy thing, that happens with me, too. I tell you what Next time you see him, just sit down, 'cause I can't have you falling and hitting your head or looking like a dork. But if your symptoms change, if the episodes become more frequent, or if you feel your heart racing beyond the normal Cody speed, just come right back. I'm gonna take your vitals one last time, and then we'll get you unhooked. Sweetie, do you mind if I head out for a real quick coffee? No problem. So, I want to hear more about this Cody guy. He's so cute. He's not the kind of guy who would normally go for someone like me. I mean, he's really popular. Popularity's overrated. Okay. You're gonna feel the cuff tightening, okay? Thanks. Julia. Julia. Hey, I need a doctor! Someone get me a doctor! You are a doctor. What are you doing? Run the code. Run the code. - Pulse? - Thready. Start compressions. Give me 0.1 milligrams of atropine, and 0.3 mg per kg of succinylcholine, and an intubation kit. Where's the intubation kit? I need a tube in now. Oxygen's dropping. Hold crich pressure. Right there. I'm in. - What's the rhythm? - Pressure's dropping. - Someone get me an EKG. - EKG. Low voltage. Sinus tach. We have v-tach! Pads. - Clear! - Rhythms's changing. P.E.A. Get me 0.1 mg per kg of epi and an amp of bicarb. - Bicarb's in. - Okay, resume compressions. Insulin, glucose, calcium in. - V-tach again. - Clear! We're losing her. Again. - Give me another milligram of epi. - Dr. Owens. - What's the rhythm? - The same. Still no pulse. Okay. Get me a 60cc syringe and an 18-gauge needle. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. What the hell happened in here? She coded! She coded. We were talking, and she coded. I realized it was alternans, and I did a pericardiocentesis. I want a chem 7, CBC, coags, an ABG, and an EKG, stat. Doreen, I want another line in the left A.C. - Wow. - That was incredible. That was so awesome. - That was absolutely perfect. - That was cool. Oh! Now I remember why we called you "Pits"! Nefarious. N-E-F-A-R-I-O-U-S. "Nefarious". That's the word that I spelled correctly in the fifth-grade spelling bee to beat Cassandra. Ever since then, she's targeted me. But the thing about Cassandra is, she's sneaky. Nothing nefarious could ever be traced back to her, like the debate club finals. Right before we started, she "accidentally" knocked over my index cards. Then I realized half of my notes were missing. Hence The flop-sweat debacle. I knew Cassandra stole those notes, but it could never be proven, just like I can't prove now that she's the one that stole My pager! Have you seen my pager? Hey, I got a full schedule. Can you keep your eye out for labs on 501? Oh, yeah, 501 Got it. Pager's missing, huh? So that's why you haven't been answering. Answering who? We got a DUI. Driver's okay. Passenger's in trouble. Car was smoking. Brother got him out. B.P. stable. Blood alcohol 0.13. Trauma 2, order a C.T., get neuro down here, stat, and be careful. Move that neck a millimeter, he doesn't walk. You two, babysit the other guy until ortho shows up! It was last night. We We were drinking last night. We woke up early to get back into town. We didn't feel drunk. I did that to my brother. I was driving. Why aren't you answering my pages? - I'm sorry. I can't find my pa-- - The rule is 60 seconds. You have what is called a pericardial effusion. Fluid has built up around the outside of your heart. But we did an EKG when she was admitted. It was normal, they said. Changes can be subtle in the beginning. It's rare. We had no reason to suspect it. So I wasn't fainting because of Cody? That's the boy she likes. No. You were fainting because your heart doesn't pump properly, and we're going to have to operate so that it can drain completely. Dr. Bandari, can I speak with you outside? Of course. So, how serious is it? Pretty serious. But you're gonna be just fine, 'cause Dr. Bandari is the best. Now, since we're alone, let's talk about the really important stuff, like when are you actually gonna tell Cody how you feel? Let's see. The day after never. What if he rejects me? What if he doesn't? Does that doctor know how you feel? What? Oh, come on. The one you were staring at during rounds. Blond hair, brown eyes. "Hands you want to linger at your neck, brush along your collarbone"? Have you not read "Twilight"? Okay, even if I was staring at him a little, that doesn't mean He totally likes you, too. How can you tell? He was looking at you when you were talking to me. Looking or looking looking? Looking looking. Can you tell the difference? Of course. I'm 12. You should tell him how you feel. Yeah, I don't know. You told me to tell Cody. - That's different. - No, it's not. Plus, if we don't tell them, someone else might get there first. That's what happened to Jacob, and Bella ended up having Edward's alien baby, which would blow. That would blow Big-time. Yours, I'm thinking? - Where was it? - In the lounge. I felt it vibrating behind a couch cushion. I wonder how it got there. Cassandra, the wicked *** of the west wing. Who knows? - Thank you so much. - No problem. Maybe you'll do me a favor at some point. Yeah, sure, anytime. How about now? Huh? She keeps staring at me. I can't tell if she's staring at me because she likes me or because I'm the chief's kid. So I need you to suss it out. Suss, uh Whether she's gay or straight. Oh Come on, I helped you. Why can't you do it? Because my dad doesn't exactly know that I swim in the lady pond. I lied before. His dislike of me does not stem from my sexuality -- It stems from my personality. Look, I just don't want to ask her out and have her reject me or, worse, gossip about me. I told you. This place is like high school. Please. Please. Please. You said you'd do me a favor. Please? Please. - Please. - Yeah, fine. Okay. Later. Just do it. Just tell him. Okay, I'm gonna move over a few inches so our shoulders are touching. If he doesn't move, then he likes me. Wait. Maybe he doesn't feel it. If he looks at me If he looks at me, I'll know he likes me. Say it. Say it. Say it. Say it. - Will? - Yeah. Nothing. Miss! You can't go back there! - Vicky! - Where's my husband? Where's Dan? He's in surgery. We haven't heard anything yet. Where is he? Come with me. I'll show you where you can wait. It's okay. That should have been me. Danny He's the good one. Angela in 530's gonna need serial hemoglobins every four hours, and page me if her systolic drops below 90. All right. Do you have the labs for 501? No. Heard you found your pager, Pits. Do not bait the beast. Do not bait the beast. Hey, Cassandra? Um Did you, um, by any chance, take my pager and hide it? Are you serious? I can't believe you're accusing me of something like that. I'm sorry. Did you, though? No, of course I didn't. You two, follow me. late-stage Alzheimer's was brought in this morning complaining of an upset stomach. C.T. showed a pseudocyst in her abdomen. Now it needs to be removed before it ruptures, but unfortunately, the daughter left, and the patient's not mentally sound enough to give consent. No consent means we need to wait for rupture to occur. Not pretty. So, I need you two to find the daughter. Of course. What's her name? That's the problem. Nobody can read her signature on the admitting paperwork. Mrs. Ellish, hi. This is Dr. Kopelson and Dr. Owens. They're gonna take good care of you, all right? You'll help me find my daughter? - Yes. - Absolutely. I will check back in later. Marian knows she's not allowed to play outside after dark. This is a safe neighborhood, but, still, you never know. So your daughter's name is Marian? Yes. Marian Ellish. Did Marian get married maybe and change her last name? Married? She's only 9 years old. Would you excuse me? I need to use the powder room. Uh, "Marian Kramden," maybe? You know, it was actually pretty funny. The whole pager gag. - "Karnin"? - Or "Konner"? And, again, I didn't take your pager. I just wish you'd come clean. That could be an "s" at the end. "Kraines"? There's nothing to come clean about. "Krasner." It's just, I know you did it. "Kravner." You don't know anything. "Kraven." I do! "Kravitch"! I didn't steal it! "Krunt." Of course you stole it, just like you stole my debate club cards in high school! I'm here to take Mrs. Ellish's vitals. She's in the bathroom. No, she's not. You lose that pager again? No, not my pager. I checked the east wing. Nothing. Okay. I have to get this. I have four pending cases. Just find her! I take it you haven't found the daughter yet. We looked away for a second. Mrs. Ellish, I am so sorry. I was looking for Marian. I know. We're gonna find her. - Don't you worry. - What's going on? Well, Mrs. Ellish wanted to take a little walk, so Dr. Owens accommodated. Why don't you take her back to her room now, though, huh? Mm. Mm-hmm. Don't forget We have dinner with the Robertsons friday night. Try not to be late again. So, if you are the person that dropped your mother off, please call me back. Thank you. Now's your chance. What? I have to find Mrs. Ellish's daughter. I'll make the calls. It's the perfect time. Just be subtle. Subtle. Sure. I can do subtle. I'm Emily. Jessica. Where are you from? Wisconsin originally. Do not mention cheese. I really love cheese. I just moved here, so I'm still kind of getting to know the place. Like, um, what do you do on the weekends? I don't know. Hang out, I guess. Yeah. There's a lot to do. There's hiking, skiing hitting up bars. Speaking of bars, do you go to straight ones or gay ones? Straight ones. Okay. And just so you know, if I was gay, you wouldn't be my type. Labs for 501. Oh. I have your labs for 501. Thank you. Hurry up. Car-accident victim's in trouble. Dan? Prep an O.R. Ready to take the lead? Solo? Absolutely. He's gonna be okay, right? He's in great hands. His brother's probably going to jail for drunk driving, and he's the lucky one. So, where are we? Ligamentous attachments have been taken down, hilum exposed. Splenic artery cross-clamped? Five years Micah's been here five years, and he's just now doing a solo surgery. Well, we thought med school would last forever, and it flew by. Do you remember what professor McCallum said when we got our cadavers in gross anatomy? "You will remember this moment The place you were standing when you made your first cut." Do you? Do you remember? Of course. I was standing next to you. I cut through the sternum. And I knew, by watching you, that you were gonna be a great surgeon. You have the most amazing hands. Say it. Say it. Say it. Thank you. My brother's okay? - Really? - Really. Dr. Barnes will be out in a minute to give you the details, but Dan's out of the woods. You almost killed him, you son of a ***! Hey, hey! What are you doing?! - Vicky, stop! - It should have been you! He almost killed my husband! Are you okay? - Yeah, I'm fine. - Here. She didn't do that. That was there before. No, I know. It's a classic seat belt abrasion from a seat belt fastened on the passenger side. You weren't driving, were you? - Of course I was. - No. Your brother has splenic trauma, which we didn't look for because it usually happens when the abdomen hits the steering wheel, and you said that he was in the passenger side. Look, you don't get it. All my life, I've been the screw-up, but not Dan. He's the only one in the family to go to college, to law school. He's interviewing to work at the D.A.'s Office. He wasn't driving. You paged me? Says she's here to sign consent forms for her mother. Great. Hi. I'm Dr. Owens. Marian Kramden. You left me a message. You have some papers for me to sign? Yes. Of course. Why don't we go to your mother's room? We can take care of it there. That woman's not my mother. No, my My mother was smart. She was vibrant. She was a great cook. She's still the same person. No. She's not. For the last three years, I have done everything for her. I have fed her and bathed her and put her to bed, and every morning she asks who I am. I just can't do it any more. I'm done. What are you doing? Marian Kramden's waiting. - Doreen says you have the paperwork. - I do. Are you going to give it to her? - No. I'm not. - Why?! Because she wants to abandon her mother. So, no, I am not gonna give her daughter any papers until I can figure out how to convince her to do the right thing. What's a non-dorky way to say, "I can't wait"? "I'm awash with anticipation." "I'm intoxicated by the prospect." "I'm yearning for the moment." I'll go with, "I can't wait." What can't you wait for? My date with Cody. You told him? Yes. And he likes me, too. You don't have to seem so surprised. No, I'm not surprised I'm impressed. That took ball--very. What's "Ballvery"? I said, um, "Bravery." Good for you. I take it you haven't told Dr. Will? I've been swamped. I'm a doctor, you know? Yeah, I do know. You're doing my surgery, right? Oh, sweetie, I can't. You need someone experienced. That mean doctor? No. Dr. Bandari is not mean. She's just not nice. But she's the best, and you want the best. I want you. Can you at least be in the room to make sure I'm okay? Please? I guess you can request that I'm in there with you. You told her that she could request you in there? I'm sorry. I didn't know what to say. You say that you don't know what the hell you're doing. You say that, even though you think you're hot stuff, you're not. And you say that you don't know if you'll ever be in a surgery because, right now, your attending physician is so pissed off, she doesn't even want to look at you. You're a rock star. Come here. Come on. She'll realize it soon enough. Okay? Say it. I like you. I've liked you since you cracked that chest in gross anatomy. You You took out the heart and held it in your hands, and I remember thinking, "That could be my heart." He may as well be holding my heart. And I was too shy to say anything. And then when we became friends, I didn't want to jeopardize the friendship. And I know that if I never said anything, then we'd always just be friends, and I don't want to be that shy girl always wishing that her life would turn out the way that I want it to. I have to make it turn out the way that I want it to. And what I want what I really, really want is you. I-I don't know um I just God, I don't see you like that. Uh I can't even tell you how I'm so touched by what you said. And I-I really hope we can still be friends because I really value our friendship. Of course we can be friends. I just needed to get that off my chest, and now it's off. And that's great. Hey. Hi. Doreen said she saw you come in here with half the vending machine. You all right? Yeah. No, I'm really great. Except for the fact that Gina hates me, my ballvery backfired, and my high-school nemesis is being very nefarious, and these are stale. Sorry. You lost me at "Ballvery"? I'm just having the worst day. Right. Um here. Follow me. Come on. That man in there is gonna have to learn how to walk again without a leg. That woman in there is gonna have a colostomy bag for the next three months. The woman down in 501 is gonna be told that she has stage IV pancreatic cancer. Now, her son's gonna try and sell her on the fact that there's all these new trials she can get into, but you and I know the truth. She's got six months, a year if she's lucky. And she's gonna feel really sick every single day of that year. So no. You're not having the worst day, not by a long shot. You must think I'm incredibly self-absorbed. No. Just human. Now, come on. Hand over the ring dings and get back to work. And the other one. You gave us quite a scare, Dan. Open up. So glad you're feeling better. Your brother, though, He's in a world of trouble, you know, since he was driving. Seems to think he deserves it, though. He keeps saying that you're the good one. You're the good one. And I believe him. I think you are good. Very good. There you are. I have been waiting to sign papers for over two hours. What's the holdup? I'm sorry. I have them. This way. I know you think I'm a terrible person. But it's not like I planned to do this, you know? I-I brought her in to be seen, and I had to go to work. The nurse She told me not to worry. She said they'd take good care of her. So I left. And then, as I was driving away, I had this overwhelming sense of relief that someone else was watching her. It didn't have to be just me anymore. I know it's a lot of work, but your mother needs you. Back off. You have no idea what this woman's going through. - Cassandra - I mean it. You have no idea what it's like to care for someone 24 hours a day, so you can't possibly judge. Exactly. Trust me. I get it. My brother had cystic fibrosis. He was sick his whole life. Growing up, we had a hospital bed in our living room. I couldn't invite anyone over because my parents were afraid he'd catch a cold. Everything, every single thing, revolved around my brother, his progress, his setbacks. But there were these moments when he felt better and we'd watch TV together or complain about our parents. And those moments, those those stupid little moments, I'd give anything for one of them again. And your mother She might not always recognize you, but she does love you. And I know that for a fact, because the whole time she's been in this hospital, the whole time She's been looking for you. Who are you? I'm your daughter. I'm here, mom. Okay, that look on your face That's the reason I didn't tell anyone in high school. I don't need your pity. I'm still a ***. Trust me, I know. You're a huge ***. Thank you. I appreciate that. But why are you such a *** to me? What did I ever do to you? Oh, come on. You really need me to say it? Everything always came so easy to you. I mean, well, not the looks thing or the popularity thing, but the school thing. You were jealous? I wouldn't say jealous. You were! You were jealous! If you ever repeat that, I'll deny it. And I'll probably spread a really nasty rumor about you. What? I'm gonna be observing Dr. Bandari in surgery. You watch. You don't talk. You don't touch. In surgery, there's always a curtain separating the patient's face from their body, because doctors are supposed to dissociate. They're supposed to focus on organs and vessels and veins and not the fact that there's a 12-year-old girl lying on the table. A girl with a great smile, a girl who's never been kissed. But you can't think about all that. Stop thinking about that, Dr. Owens. Dr. Owens What would you expect the protein level to be in the case of purulent pericarditis? This could be a trick question. She said not to talk. Dr. Owens? Findings on pericardial fluid analysis would include protein level higher than 6 grams per deciliter. Glucose? Less than 35 milligrams per deciliter. - Leukocytes? - 6,000 to 240,000. What do I want for dinner tonight? Um Thai? Wrong. Italian. Huh. I need some visualization here. Suction, please. Okay. Let's resect a little, see if we can isolate the vessel. - Blood pressure's dropping. - Move. Irrigation. I can't see the field. We need to stop this bleeding now. I need hemostasis here. Retract the tissue. I said, retract. Move. Not too much. You Get in here now. Place your finger on the pericardium. Apply steady pressure to the artery. I need you to lock off the vessel. Can you handle that? Pressure to the vessel proximally. Tie. Now I'm gonna make a small incision in the pericardium. - The window. - Exactly. Which should allow the fluid to drain gradually. Okay. That should do it. Blood pressure's rising. Well done, Dr. Owens. Just shake it. Maybe she won't notice. Dr. Owens? It was Dan. He was driving. He called the police. He He turned himself in. Really? What do I even say to Leo? How about, "I'm sorry"? I'm sorry. I heard you humiliated yourself with Jessica, and now all the nurses think you're some weird predatory lesbian. What? Don't worry. I told them you're not weird. Anyway, it's a good thing I didn't do it. It would have totally gotten back to my dad. I don't understand why you don't just tell him. I mean, you don't seem like the closeted type. I'm not. I'm the organize-the-march type. I have been since college. But with my dad, it's just different. I mean, he's only ever been with my mom. They met in high school. They have this perfect marriage. I just I feel like a kid around him. Anyway, thanks for covering for me. You're way cooler than you look. I don't Why don't I look cool? Come on. You know what I mean. Heard you kicked *** in surgery today. Oh. Not the worst day after all, huh? No, it wasn't. Are you leaving? Ah, not yet, no. See you tomorrow? - Bye. - Night. Hi, mom. Just tell me the truth. You have pancreatic cancer. But, look, there's all these great new trials that I can get you into. The thing about being an adult that no one tells you growing up is that you don't feel like an adult. All your stupid insecurities and anxieties are still there, only you feel even more stupid and insecure about being stupid and insecure because you're not supposed to be stupid and insecure any more. You're supposed to have the answers. You're supposed to know. There is good in my faults there is language to love about, muss about, too But we don't always know. And those answers? They're not always easy to come by. Hearts can know This is good for hearts can know ooh, one for hearts can know Well, you know what? I'm done feeling stupid and insecure about feeling stupid and insecure. You're heading away Hey. Are you a doctor? Yes. I am. Oh. That's pretty cool. The truth is, I think part of being an adult is that you stop waiting for yourself to change and you start to accept who you are. You sit and stare you're heading away Oh, come on! It's got to get better than this. Right?