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PREVIOUSLY ON THE L WORD...
THIS IS MAX SWEENEY.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
THAT'S SWEET.
LET ME TEACH YOU HOW TO BE BAD.
YOU GET TO STAY.
I NEED YOU TO DO ONE LAST THING FOR ME.
HE SENT YOU TO FIRE ME?
IT WAS A POWER TRIP.
HE'S A SCUMBAG.
I'VE NEVER HAD AN ABORTION.
IT MUST BE REALLY HARD.
I FEEL SO SAD FOR ANGUS.
YOU CAN BE SAD FOR YOURSELF, TOO.
YOU'RE PAPI.
ACTUALLY, IT'S PRONOUNCED PAH-PI.
I CAN MAKE A WOMAN COME JUST BY KISSING HER.
WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU WERE GOING TO GO?
HOME.
I'M YOUR HOME NOW, OKAY?
IT'S ILLEGAL TO KEEP A CHILD OUT OF SCHOOL.
WELL, LET THEM ARREST ME.
YOU PICK A T.A. YET?
NADIA. NADIA KARELLA.
YOU'RE THE MOST GLAMOROUS DEAN
THEY'VE HAD IN YEARS.
WE CALL HER "HEADS-WILL-ROLL KROLL",
BECAUSE SHE FIRES AT LEAST ONE DEAN A YEAR.
I THINK I'M A LESBIAN, BETTE.
OH.
I ONLY CHOOSE BOOKS TO REVIEW
THAT HOLD SIGNIFICANCE TO ME.
WHY DOES SOME OF HER PARTS
HOLD SIGNIFICANCE TO YOU?
MY PARTNER'S A SURVIVOR.
"SELF-INDULGENT AND SELF-PITYING"?
*** YOU, STACEY MERKIN!
*** YOU!
[♪♪]
STACEY!
STACEY!
[♪♪]
♪ GIRLS IN TIGHT DRESSES WHO DRAG WITH MUSTACHES ♪
♪ CHICKS DRIVING FAST INGENUES WITH LONG LASHES ♪
♪ WOMEN WHO LONG, LOVE, *** WOMEN WHO GIVE ♪
♪ THIS IS THE WAY IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE ♪
♪ TALKING, LAUGHING LOVING, BREATHING ♪
♪ FIGHTING, *** CRYING, DRINKING ♪
♪ WRITING, WINNING LOSING, CHEATING ♪
♪ KISSING, THINKING, DREAMING ♪
♪ THIS IS THE WAY... ♪
♪ IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE ♪
♪ IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE ♪
♪ AND LOVE ♪
HMM? HMM.
MM-HMM.
OOH! THIS IS THE ONE.
ASSOCIATION OF AMERICAN UNIVERSITIES
DIGITAL TECHNOLOGY CONFERENCE.
YOU KNOW, WHY DON'T YOU JUST...
TAKE THAT WITH YOU.
JUST FIND OUT WHO TOOK PART IN THE MEDIA LAB
AND MAKE ME A LIST
WITH THE BIOS AND CONTACT INFORMATION, OKAY?
DO YOU HAVE A KNOT?
DO YOU NEED ME TO UNLOCK IT?
IT'S-- IT'S OKAY.
NO, REALLY.
IT'S FINE.
OH, WOW.
YOU ARE REALLY TIGHT.
GOD, DO YOU FEEL THAT?
NADIA, PLEASE--
IT'S RIGHT THERE.
DO YOU WANT ME TO FIND YOU A BODYWORKER,
BECAUSE, OH, MY GOSH,
I HAVE THE MOST AMAZING AYURVEDIC HEALER,
AND HE WENT SO DEEP--
I-I-I PREFER A WOMAN.
WELL...
THAT CAN BE ARRANGED, DEAN PORTER.
ACTUALLY, I'M FINE, NADIA.
I JUST, UH...
I JUST NEED TO FIND OUT
WHAT CONFERENCES
C.U. HAS HOSTED.
I KNOW THAT WE DID
THE GLOBAL SUSTAINABILITY LAST AUGUST.
WHERE DR. GORSHAM
SUSTAINED MULTIPLE HICKEYS
FROM HIS TWO TEACHING ASSISTANTS.
YOU MEAN HE SLEPT WITH BOTH OF THEM?
DON'T BE SHOCKED.
IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME.
WELL, THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT ACCEPTABLE.
NO, BUT WE'RE ALL ADULTS, BETTE.
I MEAN, IN A CLOISTERED ENVIRONMENT
LIKE A UNIVERSITY,
IT WOULD BE ABSURD TO THINK
THAT THERE WEREN'T RELATIONSHIPS BETWEEN FACULTY AND STUDENTS.
I HADN'T GIVEN IT MUCH THOUGHT, TO BE HONEST, NADIA.
WELL...
I KNOW THE STUDENTS IN YOUR COLLEGE HAVE.
I KNOW AT LEAST 20 WHO WOULD LOVE TO BE WITH YOU.
THAT'S VERY FLATTERING.
I HATE THAT I'M JUST ONE OF THE PACK.
ALL RIGHT.
LET'S DO THIS.
[MAN]: I AM GOING TO NEED TO SEE
SOME KIND OF PAPERWORK.
I DON'T HAVE A BIRTH CERTIFICATE.
L.A.U.S.D. REQUIRES
COMPLETE HEALTH AND IMMUNIZATION RECORDS.
HAS SHAY BEEN VACCINATED?
HAVE YOU BEEN VACCINATED?
I THINK SO.
DO YOU KNOW THE NAME OF YOUR DOCTOR?
NO.
DID YOU GO TO A PUBLIC CLINIC?
DOES HE HAVE ANY, UH... ANY ALLERGIES?
ANY LEARNING DISABILITIES, PSYCHOLOGICAL PROBLEMS?
DO YOU?
NAH. DOUBT IT.
LISTEN TO ME. OVER HERE.
HOW DID HE DO ON HIS STANFORD 9?
I DON'T HAVE ANY OF THIS INFORMATION, SO--
WHY DON'T YOU TELL ME WHAT YOU DO KNOW--
I'M SORRY WE'RE WASTING YOUR TIME.
YOU'RE NOT WASTING--
GET YOUR STUFF.
MY MOM WAS PROUD OF ME FOR MY SCORE ON THAT TEST.
HOLD ON.
MR. PETERSEN.
LOOK, I'M NOT A--
OKAY, I DON'T... I DON'T KNOW THAT KID.
I MEAN, HE'S MY HALF-BROTHER, BUT...
BUT I DON'T KNOW HIM.
DO YOU KNOW WHERE THE PARENTS ARE?
YEAH, OUR, UH...
OUR FATHER BAILED ON HIM, WHICH HE ALSO DID TO ME,
AND HIS MOTHER IS MENTALLY UNFIT.
DO YOU KNOW WHERE SHE IS?
NO.
AND BEFORE YOU ASK,
I DON'T KNOW WHEN SHE'LL BE COMING BACK.
BUT LISTEN, I KNOW THIS.
I'M NOT GOING TO LET SHAY LIVE IN SOME HOMELESS SHELTER
THE WAY I DID WHEN I WAS A KID.
OKAY?
BECAUSE, I MEAN, THE TRUTH IS
HE'S--
HE'S IN A NICE HOUSE IN SPAULDING SQUARE,
RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER FROM THIS NICE SCHOOL,
AND HE NEEDS TO BE HERE.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
I MEAN, LISTEN...
I PROMISE YOU, I WILL--
I'LL GET YOU WHATEVER YOU NEED.
I SWEAR IT.
BUT I'M BEGGING YOU
TO PLEASE JUST LET HIM GO TO SCHOOL HERE.
PLEASE.
THAT IS SO *** GROSS.
SO I FOUND AN S. MERKIN.
TUNA.
EW.
IN VAN NUYS,
WHICH, OF COURSE,
IS WHERE THAT *** WAG'S GOING TO LIVE.
SO--
"*** WAG"?
MERKIN.
OH, MERKIN.
STACEY MERKIN.
SO, UM, I GO TO THE HOUSE,
AND I'M STANDING OUT FRONT,
AND I'M, LIKE, "YO, STACEY!
"COME HERE AND SAY IT TO MY *** FACE,
YOU *** ***!"
AND SO GUESS WHO COMES DOWN.
IT'S, LIKE, THIS LITTLE, LIKE,
90-YEAR-OLD KOREAN LADY
THAT'S, LIKE, "LOOK WHAT TIME IT IS.
"IT IS 4:00 IN THE MORNING.
I'M GOING TO CALL THE POLICE ON YOU!"
YOU WERE YELLING UNDER HER BALCONY
AT 4:00 IN THE MORNING?
I WAS, BUT DID YOU READ THE REVIEW?
YES.
IT WAS FUNDAMENTALLY DISHONEST, SO...
OH, YEAH. I MEAN, YEAH.
I MEAN, LESBIANS LOVE TO EAT THEIR OWN.
IT'S TRUE.
AND THE THING IS,
THE ***'S GIRLFRIEND WAS MOLESTED,
AND NOW SHE'S, LIKE, THIS PERFECT SAINT,
WHICH IS AWESOME,
AND, YOU KNOW, I WAS ABUSED,
AND I'M, LIKE, THIS ***-UP NITWIT.
BUT THAT'S MY EXPERIENCE, AND THAT'S MINE,
AND I DON'T KNOW WHY SHE'S SLAMMING ME
FOR MY OWN EXPERIENCE, YOU KNOW?
RIGHT. I GET IT.
I TOTALLY GET IT.
I'M JUST SAYING I THINK YOU SHOULD LET IT GO.
IT'S A TINY MAGAZINE.
I MEAN, WHO READS IT?
I WILL LET IT GO.
AND DIDN'T ELLE SAY SOMETHING GREAT
ABOUT, WHAT, "REFRESHINGLY LITERATE"?
THAT'S HUGE.
THAT'S ELLE.
CONCENTRATE ON THAT.
RIGHT.
I'LL LET IT GO.
CAN I TELL YOU SOMETHING?
WHAT?
I MET PAPI.
NO! WHAT HAPPENED?
OH, THE LEGEND TRANSCENDS.
SHE'S A WALKING, LIVING, BREATHING LOTHARIO.
AND?
AND I TOTALLY FELL FOR IT.
WHAT DID YOU DO?
UM, WELL, YOU KNOW--
DID YOU *** HER?
YEAH--
OH, MY GOD.
OKAY, WE WERE IN THE BACK
OF THIS SUPER-TRICKED-OUT STRETCH.
UH-HUH.
IT WAS HOT.
SHE WAS *** UNBELIEVABLE.
WAS SHE GOOD?
YEAH.
SHE'S BEEN WITH A LOT OF GIRLS, SO--
LIKE SHANE?
NO, MORE THAN SHANE.
OH, MY GOD.
OKAY, TO GIVE YOU AN EXAMPLE...
I WASN'T SURE IF I SHOULD TELL YOU,
BUT SHE WAS, UH, WITH HELENA THE SAME DAY.
WELL, THE MORNING OF THE NIGHT AFTER
THAT WE HAD--
SHE *** HELENA RIGHT AFTER SHE *** YOU?
YOUR ROOMMATE?
THAT'S SO RUDE.
NO, BUT THAT'S HER. THAT'S PAPI.
OH, MY GOD.
BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, RELATIONSHIPS AND HER,
THEY DON'T EXIST IN THE SAME UNIVERSE.
[DOOR OPENS]
OKAY.
BUT SHE DOESN'T KNOW THAT I KNOW.
HI.
HI.
WHAT A *** DISASTER.
YEAH.
I'VE HAD THREE JOB INTERVIEWS TODAY.
EITHER I'M OVER-QUALIFIED OR I HAVE NO SKILLS WHATSOEVER.
MY C.V. DOESN'T EVEN GET ME IN
FOR A JOB AS A RECEPTIONIST.
WHAT'S A C.V.?
MY RESUME.
WHY ARE YOU APPLYING--
THE PEOPLE WHO KNOW ME
WON'T EVEN BELIEVE THAT I'M DESTITUTE.
BUT WHY ARE YOU APPLYING FOR A JOB AS A RECEPTIONIST?
I WOULD PRETTY MUCH DO ANY JOB RIGHT NOW
THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE SEX OR TOUCHING INSECTS.
OTHERWISE,
I'M GOING TO BE STUCK HERE WITH ALICE
IN HER SWEET LITTLE ONE-BEDROOM.
YEAH.
I'M GLAD YOU BROUGHT UP THAT, UM...
THE ONE BEDROOM.
UM, I JUST... I...
WE NEVER HAD THAT ROOMMATE RULE TALK.
I'M GOING TO GO.
NO.
UM, I'LL GIVE YOU MINE.
I'LL START WITH ME.
UM, OKAY, LIKE,
I FEEL LIKE THIS WOULD BE
YOUR BOUNDARY OF YOUR SPACE,
SO ANYTHING IN YOUR SPACE,
YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE FOR.
AND THEN, THIS WOULD BE, YOU KNOW, MY SPACE,
AND ANYTHING IN MY SPACE
IS MINE,
UM, WHICH INCLUDES MY OFFICE SPACE, WHICH...
I'LL KIND OF SHOW YOU WHERE THAT STARTS.
[CHAIR RUMBLING]
SHIFT YOU HERE...
THIS IS MY OFFICE SPACE,
MY WORK SPACE,
AND, UM,
I'M TIDY.
I'M A TIDY PERSON, AND I LIKE TO KEEP THIS TIDY.
BUT THEN WE HAVE, YOU KNOW,
THE KITCHEN WOULD BE OUR SPACE,
KIND OF, SPACES,
AND THEN, I FEEL LIKE THE UNTIDY PERSON
SHOULD ABIDE BY THE TIDY PERSON'S RULES.
SO, DID YOU, UM, DID YOU HAVE ANY?
JUST THAT MY PRATESI SHEETS--
DON'T PUT THEM IN THE WASHING MACHINE,
BECAUSE--
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
MM-HMM, WE'LL TALK ABOUT THAT.
SHEETS.
HELLO...
HEY, BETTE.
HUH?
WHAT ABOUT HENRY AND TINA'S COCKTAIL PARTY?
TINA AND HENRY'S COCKTAIL PARTY?
UH, NO, I DON'T BELIEVE I WAS INVITED.
WELL, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT, ALICE.
[LAUGHING]
OH, MY GOD, THAT SOUNDS AWFUL.
SHE DID NOT SAY,
"A MIXER FOR OUR GAY AND OUR STRAIGHT FRIENDS"?
WELL, I HOPE YOU'RE STILL COMING TO THE PLANET TONIGHT.
KIT IS SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS NEW EVENT PLANNER.
APPARENTLY THEY DO THESE CRAZY, HOT WOMEN'S PARTIES.
OH, ALICE, I'VE GOT TO GO.
YEAH.
SO, I'LL SEE YOU TONIGHT?
GREAT. SEE YOU LATER, THEN. BYE.
PHYLLIS.
I THOUGHT YOU'D LIKE TO KNOW THE COMMITTEE
APPROVED YOUR BUDGET TO START RESEARCHING THE COST
OF CREATING THAT MEDIA LAB.
SO YOU'RE TELLING ME
THAT I HAVE A BUDGET TO DEVELOP A BUDGET?
WELCOME TO ACADEMIA.
OH, DID YOU HEAR THAT JODI LERNER REQUESTED
TO COME A WEEK LATE?
I COULDN'T SAY NO.
SHE'S BEEN SHORT-LISTED FOR THE ROME PRIZE.
[SETS NEGATIVES DOWN]
BETTE, DID YOU JUST SAY SOMETHING
ABOUT A CRAZY, HOT WOMEN'S PARTY?
UH, YEAH.
MY SISTER, KIT,
SHE OWNS THE PLANET IN WEST HOLLYWOOD.
THEY'RE DOING THIS PARTY CALLED RANCHO NOTORIOUS.
AND IT'S ALL WOMEN?
ONLY THURSDAYS.
THURSDAY IS GIRLS' NIGHT AT THE PLANET.
[RECEPTIONIST]: DEAN PORTER'S OFFICE.
WOULD IT BE TOO MUCH OF AN IMPOSITION
IF I ASKED TO JOIN YOU?
UM, TINA'S ON THE PHONE FOR YOU.
I'LL COME BACK LATER FOR THE DETAILS.
TINA. HEY.
A PARTY.
REALLY?
NO, THAT SOUNDS INTERESTING.
DID ALICE PUT YOU UP TO THIS?
YOU-- YOU DIDN'T KNOW WHETHER OR NOT TO INVITE ME
WHEN YOU INVITED ALL OF MY FRIENDS?
WELL, WE HAVE A CHILD TOGETHER, TINA.
I MEAN, WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO GET ALONG.
[SIGHING]
FU-- YOU KNOW SOMETHING?
YOU KNOW, YOU'VE MADE QUITE A SCENE OR TWO
IN YOUR TIME, TOO,
SO DON'T GET ON YOUR HIGH HOR--
NO, OKAY, I DON'T WANT TO FIGHT WITH YOU EITHER.
I'M JUST MAKING A POINT THAT I'VE MOVED ON.
I'VE FOUND CLOSURE.
THERE'S NOTHING BETWEEN US ANYMORE
THAT WOULD CAUSE ME TO WANT TO MAKE A SCENE, YOU KNOW?
WELL, THANK YOU FOR THE INVITATION.
I APPRECIATE IT.
YES, BUT I'M GOING TO DECLINE.
YEAH, SOME OTHER TIME.
BYE.
[♪♪]
YOU HAVE OUTDONE YOURSELF THIS TIME.
OH, MY. LOOK AT THIS PLACE!
IT'S FANTASTIC.
YOU LIKE IT?
DO I LIKE IT?
MINDY AND I ARE GOING TO HAVE A BLOODY SHOOTOUT
AT THE END OF THE NIGHT.
WELL, OF COURSE YOU ARE.
YEE-HAW!
OH, HERE HE IS.
MEET ANGUS, MY BOYFRIEND.
SAY HOWDY TO MINDY AND ROCHELLE.
HOWDY, LITTLE LADIES.
HOWDY.
HOWDY.
I'M NOT JUST YOUR BOYFRIEND.
I AM YOUR JUST-BEEN-OFFERED A-$100,000-DOLLAR-RECORD-DEAL-
WITH-THRILL-CITY- RECORDS BOYFRIEND.
NUH-UH!
UH-HUH!
AH!
AH!
OH, MY GOD! OH, HO, HO, HO!
OH, MY GOD! ♪ DO-DO-DO-DO-DO ♪
[BOTH SCATTING]
CONGRATULATIONS!
WOW!
SO, THIS IS THE AIR FILTER.
YOU JUST TAKE IT OUT.
CHECK IT OUT.
YUCK.
CAN YOU GRAB THE NEW ONE OVER THERE?
WANT TO PUT IT IN?
SURE.
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT. GOOD JOB.
SNAP THAT BACK.
HEY, SHAY.
READY TO GO TO TINA AND HENRY'S?
WILL THERE BE KIDS THERE?
UH, WELL, UM, ANGELICA WILL BE THERE,
AND, YOU KNOW, THEY MIGHT HAVE A MOVIE FOR YOU TO WATCH.
HE COULD STAY HERE WITH ME IF HE WANTS.
I MEAN, I'M JUST GOING TO BE
WORKING ON THE CAR AND, I DON'T KNOW.
MAYBE LATER WE COULD GO GET SOME BURGERS
OR SOMETHING.
YEAH!
REALLY?
YEAH.
OKAY, WELL, THAT-- WAIT.
THAT MEANS YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TINA AND HENRY'S.
I WASN'T INVITED.
OH.
IT'S COOL.
I MEAN,
I DON'T EVEN REALLY KNOW TINA THAT WELL,
AND, UM, I'D RATHER NOT HAVE TO DEAL ANYWAY, SO...
WELL, ARE YOU OKAY WITH THAT, SHAY?
YEAH.
YEAH?
WELL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
SURE.
APPRECIATE IT.
SEE YOU LATER.
[INDISTINCT BACKGROUND CONVERSATION]
WHICH ONE IS TINA'S EX?
SHE COULDN'T MAKE IT.
THANK GOD.
SO EVEN THE--
EVEN THE BEAUTIFUL ONE OVER THERE?
YES, BRAD. GIVE IT UP.
THEY'RE ALL LESBIANS.
[BRAD, GROANING]: OH.
THANK YOU.
[CHUCKLING]
THANK YOU.
WOW. WHO'S THAT?
THIS IS A SURPRISE.
HI.
YEAH, I CHANGED MY MIND.
HELLO, HENRY.
HI.
SO, WHERE'S MY BABY GIRL?
SHE'S ASLEEP.
WATCH OUT. THERE'S GONNA BE A CRASH!
I'LL GET MORE.
OKAY. GREAT.
THIS IS NICE.
IT KIND OF REMINDS ME OF YOUR APARTMENT ON DOHENY.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
YEAH, IT'S FINE.
I'D REMODEL IT, BUT I DON'T LIVE HERE.
YET.
HEY.
THANK GOD YOU'RE HERE. WE'RE TOTALLY OUTNUMBERED.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
STRAIGHT PEOPLE.
OH, JESUS.
HI.
BETTE.
JENNY.
HELLO.
HELLO.
WHAT DO YOU SAY
WE MOVE INTO A BIG PLACE LIKE THIS SOMEDAY?
I SAY, NOT UNTIL YOUR FIRST CHECK CLEARS.
AND THEN MINE.
HEY. HI.
HEY. HOW ARE YOU?
GOOD. HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GLAD YOU CAME.
OF COURSE. OF COURSE.
I DIDN'T THINK ANYONE WAS GOING TO COME.
OH, NO. NO.
DO YOU WANT SOME FOOD?
UH, YEAH. YEAH.
OH, UH, KELLY, AND UH--
ALISON.
ALISON? YES.
YEAH.
UM, THIS IS MY FRIEND SHANE.
HI.
DO YOU WANT A BEER?
I WOULD LOVE ONE. THANK YOU.
HELLO.
HI.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
HI.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
THAT'S SUCH A GREAT NAME.
SHANE.
OH, THANK YOU.
THANKS.
IT'S PERFECT FOR YOU.
OH, WELL, THANK YOU, I GUESS.
GOOD-- GLAD TO KNOW THAT.
UM, BUT I'M GOING TO GO FIND TINA
FOR THAT DRINK,
SO SEE YOU IN A BIT.
OKAY.
SEE YOU AROUND.
ALL RIGHT, YOU GUYS.
GRACE PERIOD'S UP.
I'M GOING IN.
GOOD LUCK.
SO BRAVE.
SHANE!
OH, MY GOD!
OH, THANK YOU.
I AM GOING TO BE THE BEST RECEPTIONIST
YOU HAVE EVER HAD.
OKAY, GOOD, LISTEN,
BUT I'M WARNING YOU, IT'S A *** JOB.
I DON'T CARE.
OKAY, BUT IT'S YOURS IF YOU WANT IT.
OKAY, GOOD.
I WANT IT.
YOU GOT IT.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATION]
YOUR DAUGHTER IS ADORABLE.
THANK YOU.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ONE DAY SHE DECIDED
SHE WANTED TO LIVE WITH HER FATHER?
WE DON'T CALL HIM THE FATHER.
WE CALL HIM THE DONOR.
I REALLY DON'T THINK THAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN.
OH, SORRY, EXCUSE ME, UM...
I-- I KNOW YOU DON'T WANT IT TO HAPPEN, BUT, YOU KNOW,
KIDS HAVE MINDS OF THEIR OWN,
AND, I MEAN, I'M SURE YOUR PARENTS
WOULD RATHER YOU WEREN'T A LESBIAN,
YOU KNOW?
MY PARENTS ARE DEAD.
BETTE.
BRAD.
LOOK, I-I'M NOT A HOMOPHOBE, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?
BUT, LOOK.
IF MY SON CAME HOME
AND HE TOLD ME THAT HE WAS GAY,
I MEAN, I'M SURE
I WOULD COME AROUND TO IT,
BUT, YOU KNOW,
AT FIRST THERE WOULD BE A REACTION, AND--
I'M SORRY, I'M JUST TRYING TO BE HONEST HERE, I--
AN HONEST HOMOPHOBE.
HOW NICE.
YOU KNOW, BETTE, DON'T GET INTO IT.
NO, I UNDERSTAND, BRAD.
I MEAN,
YOU FIND *** REPULSIVE
AND YOU DON'T CARE
ABOUT YOUR SON'S PERSONAL HAPPINESS
AS MUCH AS YOU DO
YOUR OWN COMFORT LEVEL, RIGHT?
YOU KNOW, PERSONALLY,
I'M ALL FOR IT... BETWEEN WOMEN.
IT'S JUST THAT...
THE IDEA OF TWO GUYS...
WELL, YOU UNDERSTAND, RIGHT?
[CHUCKLES]
IT'S NOT THAT BAD, ACTUALLY.
COME AGAIN, DUDE?
MM.
THAT WHOLE ***-IN-*** THING.
I USED TO THINK IT WAS A LITTLE CREEPY.
AND PAINFUL, TOO,
BUT I FOUND THIS GREAT LUBE.
IT'S CALLED BOY BUTTER.
ONCE I DISCOVERED THAT, IT WAS LIKE...
[IMITATES BASS THROBBING]
LET'S GET THIS PARTY STARTED, YOU KNOW.
I LOVE HIM.
HE LOVES YOU, TOO.
I'VE GOT TO GET BACK TO THE PLANET.
COME ON, BUTTER BOY.
LET'S SLIDE ON OUT OF HERE.
[LAUGHING]
I HAVE AN IDEA.
GAME OF CELEBRITY?
[♪♪]
DO YOU HAVE A COUPLE EXTRA SPOTS
ON THE GUEST LIST?
MY BOYS ARE COMING DOWN
TO CELEBRATE OUR IMPENDING SUPER-MEGA-STARDOM.
OH, OF COURSE.
THRILL CITY.
HERE WE COME.
PHYLLIS, YOU CAN DO THIS.
HEY, BEAUTIFUL.
CAN I BUY YOU A DRINK?
OH, I'M NOT QUITE READY FOR A DRINK YET.
[♪♪]
[BRAD]: GO? OKAY.
OKAY. READY?
YOU GO.
OH.
WE-- WE WON ALREADY.
THIS IS SO EASY. OKAY.
READY?
YEAH.
ACTRESS. SHE WAS IN I "HEART" HUCKABEES.
NAOMI WATTS.
NO, BUT FUNNIER.
UM, SHE WAS IN 9 TO 5.
SHE--
OH, RIGHT.
OKAY.
OH, I KNOW, I KNOW. WHAT'S HER NAME?
YOU KNOW IT.
OH!
MAJOR ***. MAJOR ***.
SHE CAME OUT BIG TIME IN 2000.
I MEAN, WE ALREADY KNEW, BUT.
UM...
COME ON, BIG BUSINESS!
***.
BIG BUSINESS!
SORRY, YOU GUYS, TIME'S UP.
[BRAD]: WHO IS IT?
LILY TOMLIN!
LILY TOMLIN IS NOT A LESBIAN, IS SHE?
UM, HELLO?
BRAD...
HE WAS ON THE VERGE OF GETTING IT.
THE GAY CLUE THREW HIM OFF.
YEAH.
OH, REALLY.
WOW.
OKAY, WHO'S NEXT?
SHANE?
TRY ME.
OH, UH, OKAY.
[SIGHING, CHUCKLING]
HA. OKAY.
UM, UM, OKAY.
UH, LE TIGRE.
AND JULIE RUIN.
BIKINI KILL.
OH, EASY.
I KNOW IT.
THANK YOU.
[WHISPERING]
IT'S SO EASY!
UH... ONE...
ONE MORE TIME.
[ALL LAUGHING]
KATHLEEN HANNA.
WHAT'S SHE A CELEBRITY FOR?
OH, SHE JUST PRETTY MUCH STARTED
THE WHOLE RIOT GRRRL MUSIC SCENE, BUT, HEY.
WHAT'S THE RIOT GRRRL MUSIC SCENE?
OKAY. WHO'S NEXT?
OKAY, MY TURN, MY TURN, MY TURN.
OH. I DON'T--
I DON'T KNOW WHO TERRELL OWENS IS.
OH, HO, HO.
[JENNY]: WHAT?
WHAT?
FOOTBALL PLAYER.
OH.
DO YOU? SHANE?
NO.
HE'S THE MOST TALENTED RECEIVER IN FOOTBALL.
AND HE APPEARED WITH A DESPERATE HOUSEWIFE
IN A COMMERCIAL.
SHE DROPPED HER TOWEL.
OKAY.
THE DESPERATE-- WHAT?
[WHISPERING]: THIS IS EXCRUCIATING.
I WOULD LOVE TO GET OUT OF HERE.
LET'S JUST GO, OKAY?
[ALICE]: I'LL DO ANOTHER ONE.
OKAY.
LET'S PLAY. WHO WANTS TO CHOOSE NEXT?
IT'S KIND OF LATE, THOUGH.
OKAY.
DO YOU WANT TO--
[JENNY]: SHANE, SHANE, WHAT TIME IS IT?
[ALICE]: IT IS LATE, ISN'T IT?
IT IS.
[♪♪]
LADIES, LADIES, LADIES, LADIES, LADIES.
OH, GOD.
THANK GOD FOR MY LITTLE LESBIAN PLANET.
[HELENA]: OH, MY GOD. THAT'S PAPI.
HEY.
HEY, CHICAS. WHAT'S UP?
[♪♪]
HEY, THERE'S SHANE. SHANE!
SHANE?
AH, THIS OUGHT TO BE INTERESTING.
[WESTERN THEME PLAYS]
[HORSE WHINNYING]
[♪♪]
[HORSE WHINNYING]
HEY.
HEY, HEY.
KIT SAVED US A TABLE IN THE BACK.
OH, GOOD. GOOD.
YOU'RE SHANE?
[EXHALING]
WHEW. YEAH.
YOU'RE JUST A SKINNY LITTLE WHITE GIRL.
OH.
YEAH, I GUESS I AM.
SHANE.
WHAT?
THIS IS PAPI.
WHO?
PAPI.
SO WHAT?
SO, I'M YOUR COMPETITION.
OH!
OH. OKAY.
WELL, YOU KNOW,
I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY WHAT WE'RE COMPETING FOR,
BUT, UH, YOU WIN.
SO, IT WAS NICE TO MEET YOU.
I'M GOING TO GO SIT WITH BETTE.
YOU GOING TO COME?
YEAH.
I'LL BUY YOU A DRINK.
OKAY...
OKAY.
[TOILET FLUSHING]
I MISSED THAT READING.
OH, YEAH, IT WAS, UH, IT WAS LAST WEEK.
ANYWAY, THE BOOK IS REALLY AWFUL.
HAVE YOU READ IT?
NO, BUT THE REVIEW IN CURVE MAGAZINE--
"SOME OF HER PARTS MAKES ME ASHAMED
TO EVEN CALL MYSELF A LESBIAN."
I FEEL LIKE I DON'T EVEN REALLY KNOW
HOW TO TALK TO WOMEN ANYMORE.
YOU JUST HAVE TO BE PATIENT, HELENA.
I MEAN, YOU'RE REINVENTING YOURSELF.
THAT'S BIG.
WHOA, BOY.
HELLO.
HEY.
YOU OKAY?
***, ***, ***.
I CANNOT BELIEVE SHE ACTUALLY CAME.
WHO?
WHAT?
WHAT, WHAT, WHAT, WHAT?
WHAT, DID YOU SLEEP WITH SOMEONE?
NO, NOT IN THIS CENTURY.
OKAY, GIRLS, GIRLS, OKAY, HERE'S THE DEAL.
PHYLLIS KROLL,
EXECUTIVE VICE CHANCELLOR, CALIFORNIA UNIVERSITY.
VERY ACCOMPLISHED. VERY DIGNIFIED.
VERY MUCH MY BOSS.
I REPEAT, VERY MUCH MY BOSS.
SHE'S BEEN MARRIED FOR 25 YEARS,
AND IS NOW, AT THIS RELATIVELY LATE DATE,
CONVINCED SHE'S A LESBIAN
AND IS PEEKING OUT OF THE CLOSET AS WE SPEAK.
SO, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, BE NICE TO HER
AND TRY TO TALK TO HER AND TRY NOT TO MAKE HER FEEL
LIKE SHE'S THE OLDEST *** LESBIAN ON THE PLANET.
PHYLLIS, HI!
IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU.
I'VE BEEN HERE FOR A WHILE,
JUST KIND OF HIDING OUT IN THE BACK.
WELL, YOU ARE NOW AMONG FRIENDS.
OH.
THIS IS SHANE McCUTCHEON.
HEY.
SHANE.
HOW YOU DOING?
THIS IS ALICE PIESZECKI.
HELLO, PHYLLIS.
ALICE.
AND HELENA PEABODY.
HI.
HELENA.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
JOIN US?T YOU
YEAH.
I'D LOVE TO.
YEAH.
OH.
[SIGHING]
I HATE TO SAY IT, MAN,
BUT THE A&R GUY CALLED BACK.
THE THING IS, DUDE,
THEY NEED A HOT YOUNG SINGER TO SELL RECORDS.
YEAH.
I MEAN, IT'S NOT LIKE IT'S ANYTHING NEW.
SO, YOU WOULDN'T BE ACTUALLY IN THE BAND.
THEY SAID THEY'VE ALREADY GOT A GUY LINED UP FOR US.
AND YOU'LL TOTALLY STILL GET,
LIKE, SONGWRITING CREDIT.
I KNOW YOU'RE NOT SERIOUS.
IT'S OUT OF OUR CONTROL, KIT.
DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS?
HEY.
HOW LONG YOU'VE BEEN WAITING?
YOU CANDY-*** PIECE OF ***, YOU.
YOU'D BE NOTHING WITHOUT ANGUS.
NOTHING!
YOU MUST BE OUT OF YOUR *** MIND.
YOU MUST BE *** CRAZY.
GET THE *** OUT OF HERE.
GO ON, GET OUT OF HERE.
SHE'S THE ONE THAT OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED
TO CALL HERSELF A LESBIAN.
WHAT I FIND
SO UTTERLY SPECIOUS
IS THE ASSERTION SHE MADE ABOUT HER OWN LADYFRIEND.
I KNOW, I MEAN, SAINT LINDSEY?
WHY IS SHE THE PANTHEON OF HONESTY?
IT'S PATHETIC,
WRITING ABOUT HER OWN GIRLFRIEND
IN THE REVIEW.
THE FACT THAT SHE COMPARED THE TWO OF YOU
IS PROOF ENOUGH OF HER STUPIDITY.
I KNOW. THANK YOU.
I MEAN, THE WHOLE THING WAS,
I WASN'T WRITING ABOUT ALL SURVIVORS' STORIES.
I WAS JUST WRITING ABOUT MY STORY AND MY EXPERIENCE.
IT'S A SHAME YOU CAN'T DO WHAT I DID
WHEN I GOT MY FIRST BAD REVIEW.
OH, PHYLLIS, YOU NEVER GOT A BAD REVIEW.
I DID SO, ON MY SECOND BOOK.
THE REVIEWER FROM THE JOURNAL OF EDUCATION AND POLICY
ABSOLUTELY RIDICULED MY PREMISE.
SO WITH A WICKED REBUTTAL,
I DISMANTLED HIM POINT BY POINT.
HE LOST HIS JOB BECAUSE OF IT.
IT'S TOO BAD
YOU CAN'T PROVE YOUR CRITIC WAS WRONG
ABOUT HER GIRLFRIEND'S UNIMPEACHABLE INTEGRITY.
THAT IS FOR SURE, JENNY.
I AGREE, PHYLLIS.
TOTALLY AGREE.
[KNOCKING]
THEY AIN'T *** WITHOUT YOU, AND YOU KNOW IT.
WHAT DOES IT MATTER?
SO THEY'LL SUCK AND I'LL...
ROT AWAY AND DIE,
TOO OLD TO BE VIABLE AS A MUSICIAN.
YOU'RE THE ONE THAT TOLD ME
WHEN YOU'RE CALLED TO DO MUSIC,
NOTHING CAN STOP YOU.
YEAH, WELL, THEY JUST STOPPED ME.
THAT'S ***.
YOU CAN'T LET THEM--
LISTEN.
DON'T TRY AND MAKE ME FEEL BETTER,
'CAUSE I'M JUST NOT GONNA.
GOD, YOU KNOW,
I THINK I JUST NEED TO BE ALONE.
[SIGHING]
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
[MAX]: 11.
[GRUNTING]
12.
13.
[KNOCKING]
YEAH?
HEY.
HEY.
I WONDER IF YOU CAN DO ME A FAVOR.
15. YEAH?
I'M TRYING TO FIND A FRIEND OF MINE, UM...
NAMED, UH, LINDSEY,
WHO I WENT TO SUMMER CAMP WITH
IN, LIKE, 1987.
I THINK THAT, UH, SHE WAS ASSAULTED
AND SHE HAD TO GO TO THIS HOSPITAL
NAMED COLDWATER COMMUNITY HOSPITAL,
AND I WONDER WHETHER YOU COULD HELP ME FIND HER.
[MAX GRUNTING]
WELL, THAT'S NOT REALLY MUCH TO GO ON,
BUT I COULD DO A COMPUTER SEARCH
AND SEE WHAT I CAN COME UP WITH.
I DEFINITELY WANT THAT,
BECAUSE I'M WRITING AN ARTICLE ABOUT THE HOSPITAL
FOR SALON MAGAZINE,
SO IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT TO ME
THAT I SPEAK TO HER ABOUT, YOU KNOW, HER EXPERIENCE THERE.
OKAY?
WHAT?
YOU WANT ME TO DO IT NOW?
IF YOU DON'T MIND.
OKAY.
[♪♪]
[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]
[SCREAMING AND WHISTLING]
I'M REALLY-- I'M SORRY, PHYLLIS--
YEE-HAW!
WOW. GO GET 'EM, PHYLLIS!
[♪♪]
[CHILDREN LAUGHING AND SHOUTING, BELL RINGS]
OKAY.
GO AHEAD.
[BETTE]: FAUVISM.
DADAISM. CUBISM.
SURREALISM.
MODERNISM.
WE'LL COVER THE REST NEXT WEEK.
YES?
EVEN FLUXUS, DEAN PORTER?
YEAH. FALLS UNDER DADA.
SO, NEXT WEEK
WE'LL DISCUSS THE WAYS
IN WHICH ART REVEALS ATTITUDES ABOUT THE CULTURE.
MM, BUT YOU WANTED ME TO REMIND YOU TO ASSIGN
EVERYONE TOPICS
AT THE END OF THE SESSION, BETTE--
I MEAN, DEAN PORTER.
THANK YOU, NADIA.
SO, WE'LL DO THAT BEGINNING OF NEXT SESSION.
I LOVE YOU, BETTE.
WILL YOU MARRY ME?
SHUT UP.
GOOD JOB, BETTE.
YOU'VE GOT THEM IN THE PALM OF YOUR HAND.
I WISH I COULD DO IT EVERY DAY.
THEN YOUR DEPARTMENT HEADS
WOULD HAVE TO DO THEIR OWN FUNDRAISING.
[LAUGHS]
I WANTED TO THANK YOU FOR LAST NIGHT.
I HAD A LOVELY TIME.
WELL, I'M GLAD YOU ENJOYED YOURSELF.
I ESPECIALLY LOVED ALICE.
SHE'S SO VIBRANT.
YEAH. SHE'S A GREAT GIRL.
SO...
DO YOU THINK SHE LIKED ME?
YOU KNOW HOW TO WORK A CREDIT CARD?
NOT ACTUALLY, NO.
I'M GOING TO GET BLOODY MARTA TO HELP YOU.
OKAY.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
OOH!
GOOD MORNING. THE WAX. HOW MAY I HELP YOU?
NO, NO. SAY "WAX".
SORRY. WAX!
UM, MARTA.
I'M SORRY, WHAT--
WHAT WAS THAT YOU WERE SAYING?
I NEED A BOX OF BONES, REDS, TOO,
AND SOME WAX AND GRIP TAPE.
I'M SORRY, COULD YOU JUST GIVE ME ONE MOMENT?
YOU NEED A BOX OF RED BONES AND WHAT?
UM, CAN YOU JUST GIVE ME A MOMENT?
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
WOW!
WOW. FANCY.
I LIKE THIS. THIS IS GOOD.
A WHOLE NEW BETTE, HUH?
ARTSY.
A LITTLE ARTSY-FARTSY GOING ON HERE?
WE HAVE A SITUATION, ALICE.
WHAT, ARE YOU GOING TO STICK ME IN THE CORNER
WITH A DUNCE CAP ON, PRINCIPAL PORTER?
MY BOSS IS ATTRACTED TO YOU.
REALLY?
YEAH.
SHE THINKS YOU TWO MADE A REAL CONNECTION.
SHE SAID THAT YOU MADE
MEANINGFUL EYE CONTACT WITH HER.
IS THAT TRUE?
SHE THINKS I FLIRTED WITH HER?
ALICE, THIS ISN'T FUNNY.
NO.
NO, IT'S NOT.
SHE WEPT IN MY ARMS
BECAUSE SHE'S BEEN UNHAPPY FOR 25 YEARS
AND NOW SHE'S DYING TO FIND OUT
WHAT SHE'S BEEN MISSING,
AND SHE THINKS YOU SENT HER SIGNALS.
SHE REALLY THINKS I SENT HER SIGNALS?
REALLY?
YES.
AND WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
WE HAVE TO LET HER DOWN EASY.
OKAY. OKAY.
ALICE, IT'S NOT FUNNY.
NO. IT'S NOT FUNNY.
[WOMAN]: YOU GUYS, THERE HE IS.
[GIGGLING]: ISN'T HE CUTE?
NOW, THIS BATCH
IS SUPPOSED TO BE CHEESEBURGERS.
ALL RIGHT.
YOU'RE SURE YOU DON'T MIND?
NOT AT ALL.
I'LL GO GET THE BUNS.
ALL RIGHT.
HI, MAX.
HEY.
I'M REALLY GLAD YOU CAME.
WELL, IT WAS NICE OF YOUR DAD
TO INVITE ME.
I INVITED YOU.
WELL, THEN, IT WAS NICE OF YOU TO INVITE ME.
[WOMAN #2]: COME ON, BROOKE.
I'LL SEE YOU IN A MINUTE, OKAY?
ALL RIGHT.
[SOTTO VOCE]: AW, MAN.
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
I'LL BE RIGHT WITH YOU.
BE RIGHT WITH YOU.
GOOD AFTERNOON, THE W-- I MEAN, WAX.
[♪♪]
SHANE?
GUY GALLO.
MARKETING DIRECTOR FOR HUGO BOSS.
HI.
I MET YOU AT CHERIE JAFFE'S PARTY LAST WEEK.
OH.
YOU DON'T REMEMBER?
I DON'T. I WAS A LITTLE, UM--
YEAH. YEAH, ME TOO.
BUT YOU MADE QUITE AN IMPRESSION ON ME.
I HAVE A PROPOSITION FOR YOU.
[♪♪]
MAX, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD.
COME ON.
WHY DON'T YOU COME INTO THE POOL?
NO.
TRY THEM ON.
I'LL TAKE SOME SNAPSHOTS,
THEN I'LL SEND THEM OVER TO HUGO BOSS HIMSELF.
LOOK.
LOOK, I APPRECIATE THAT YOU CAME DOWN HERE AND ALL,
BUT I'M NOT A MODEL.
IT'S A LUCRATIVE GIG.
YEAH, WELL, I'M SURE IT IS, BUT I'M JUST--
I'M SORRY, I'M NOT INTERESTED.
EXCUSE ME.
SHAY. HEY.
HOW YOU DOING?
HOW WAS SCHOOL?
YOU WANT TO GET YOUR HOMEWORK DONE?
TAKE SOME TIME.
THINK ABOUT IT.
NO.
BUT THANK YOU, I APPRECIATE IT.
I'M SORRY, BROOKE.
I'M REALLY SORRY.
I JUST--
I HAVE THIS EAR CONDITION, YOU KNOW?
EVER SINCE I WAS ON THE SWIM TEAM IN HIGH SCHOOL
AND I... I CAN'T GO IN THE WATER.
OKAY?
AND IT REALLY BUMS ME OUT,
I SHOULDN'T HAVE FREAKED OUT ON YOU LIKE THAT.
I'M REALLY SORRY.
I FORGIVE YOU.
YOU DO?
I'M CRAZY ABOUT YOU.
DONALD, DON'T POINT.
HAVE A GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE,
AND DON'T FORGET TO GIVE ME YOUR LISTS
FOR THE MAJOR DONORS RECEPTION BY FRIDAY.
LONG DAY, BETTE?
YEAH, AND IT'S NOT OVER.
I STILL HAVE TO APPROVE THE ARTWORK
FOR THE PRESENTATION.
PHYLLIS.
ALICE.
HELLO, PROFESSOR PORTER.
DEAN PORTER, ALICE.
YOU'RE DEMOTING HER.
I AM TAKING PHYLLIS TO MURAKAMI.
LESBIAN SUSHI.
REALLY?
LESBIANS HAVE THEIR OWN SPECIAL KIND OF SUSHI?
OH, YEAH.
PHYLLIS, I THINK THAT YOU SHOULD ORDER BETTE OUT ON A DATE.
IS THIS A DATE?
SHE WORKS TOO HARD.
WELL, I CAN'T EXACTLY
ORDER HER TO GO OUT ON A DATE.
NO, YOU REALLY CAN'T.
BUT I DO HOPE
YOU'RE TAKING CARE OF YOUR PERSONAL NEEDS, BETTE.
ACADEMIA CAN BE SO VERY SUFFOCATING.
OH. YEAH. SHE'S RIGHT.
HAVE A GOOD DATE.
OKAY, THANKS.
PHYLLIS.
***, ALICE.
YOU'RE RIGHT, IT'S MY FAULT.
I'VE COMPLETELY BOLLOXED UP THE SCHEDULE.
I MEAN, MAYBE WE CAN--
MAKE-- SURE.
I'M SORRY, I CAN'T REALLY TELL
WHICH IS THE FOAM AND WHICH IS THE WAX.
MAYBE IF WE CAN... HAVE A LOOK AT IT.
OH, YOU WANT--
YOU WANT YOUR VISA BA--
***!
***. ***. ***.
THIS IS YOURS. AND, OH-- ***!
AND, UM, THESE ARE YOURS.
AND--
HELLO?
[DIAL TONE BUZZING]
[RECEIVER SETTLES IN CRADLE]
THAT BAD, HUH?
I'M JUST NOT UP TO THIS, SHANE.
I'M SORRY.
[SIGHING]
THANKS FOR THE OPPORTUNITY, THOUGH.
YOU KNOW, I, UH...
I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THERE'S SOMETHING
THAT YOU'RE REALLY GOOD AT.
I DO.
BUT I JUST THINK YOU JUST NEED TO
TAKE THE TIME
AND FIGURE OUT WHAT IT IS.
THANKS.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT THIS.
IT'S A *** MESS, BUT--
YEAH, IT'S A REAL MESS.
LET'S GO LOCK UP.
CAN YOU GET MY BAG?
THANKS, SHAY.
THANKS, SHANE.
OH, PLEASE.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
ALL RIGHT.
GRAB THAT.
OH. NADIA.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I SEEM TO REMEMBER
WHEN YOU WERE INTERVIEWING T.A. CANDIDATES
THAT YOU SAID,
"IF I'M WORKING, YOU'RE WORKING."
I FINISHED THE FIRST SET FOR THE MEDIA LAB.
GOD, YOU ARE REALLY TALENTED.
THAT MEANS A LOT COMING FROM YOU.
[VOICES IN BACKGROUND, STREET NOISES]
NADIA?
WHERE DO YOU LIVE?
ECHO PARK.
DO YOU NEED A RIDE?
YEAH.
I DON'T WANT TO TROUBLE YOU.
NO. IT'S NO TROUBLE.
I MEAN, IT'S MORE OR LESS ON MY WAY HOME, SO...
WOULD IT BE WRONG
IF I TOLD YOU
THAT I CAN'T KEEP MY EYES OFF OF YOU?
YES.
WOULD IT BE WRONG IF I TOLD YOU
THAT YOU WERE THE MOST...
INTRIGUING PERSON THAT I'VE EVER MET?
YES.
WOULD IT BE WRONG IF I TOLD YOU
THAT I HAVE NEVER WANTED TO KISS SOMEONE
MORE THAN I WANT TO KISS YOU RIGHT NOW?
[PARKING BRAKE CREAKS]
NADIA.
[♪♪]
[MOANING]
[♪♪]
CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY:
LINE 21 MEDIA SERVICES LTD. VANCOUVER, B.C. 2006