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Welcome to the Paul F. Tompkins Show. I am Paul F. Tompkins. I don't know why you would be here...
...if you didn't already know that, but...
..who knows why people make decisions? There might be...
...eccentric millionaires in the audience...
...who have money to burn!
um...
I am not...
...necessarily...
...a political comedian...
...ladies and gentlemen.
But there's something that I would like to talk about that...
...I have been...
...thinking about for a while and then somebody, a friend of mine on Facebook...
...which is the worst thing in the world, by the way.
Why are we all still on it? What are we doing?
We have the power to bring it down! *applause*
I have one friend whose Facebook updates are exclusively...
...complaining about Facebook.
What is going on?
What is this world that we're in? So...
...a friend of mine posted on Facebook...
...about Chick-fil-A
This is the...
...uh... fast food chicken...
...restaurant...
...uh... that is run by religious people. How religious are they?
They're so religious...
...they're closed on Sundays...
...when they could be doing a booming business!
With hung over people.
And look, there's many a time I'd be in an airport like, "Oh my god, that's right..."
"...Chick-fil-A is a thing!" because it wasn't here for the longest time.
It was like, "I'm gonna go to the airport..."
"...and get myself a chicken sandwich"
But forgot that it was Sunday and even the airport Chick-fil-A is closed on Sundays.
So these people are very religious. And then...
...they're apparently very anti-gay. Excuse me.
They're very pro traditional family.
Which is..
under attack, by...
...gay people just being around, right?
Like, just the idea of them is like...
...it's corrupting families where they're like, "Wait! There's another way?" and then families break apart. Husbands are like, "I'm outta here!"
So...
So I've heard...
...arguments from people...
...who love Chick-fil-A, and these are progressive open-minded people, right?
Who love Chick-fil-A...
...and they're trying to figure out a reason...
...uh... that enables them
...to be who they are...
...and still eat at Chick-fil-A.
And so...
..two people in my life
...using this argument...
...which basically is, "Well now, hold on a second..."
"...I don't go and investigate..."
"...all the other businesses and services..."
"...that I use..."
"...like who knows were my phone bill money goes? Or, you know my bank or..or if I buy a Coke..."
"...I don't know where that money goes so..."
"...since I'm not doing..."
"...the investigative journalism..."
"...that would be required to find out where my money goes there,..."
"...it doesn't make sense to boycott Chick-fil-A."
So basically the argument is, "Well,..."
"...I don't know what they're doing."
"I know what *they're* doing."
"But if i'm not..."
"...a decent enough human being..."
"...to do my own investigations on these other corporations..."
"...what right do I have..."
"...to not continue to eat those chicken sandwiches?"
So...
My friend posts this. There's a long long thread with a bunch of people...
...uh...chiming in.
uh...one of the things that he said was:
"I'm gonna keep eating at Chick-fil-A because why should I stop..."
"...just because I disagree with their politics?"
Now, when I think of the word "politics"...
...I think of like...
"Hey, there should be a smaller government!"
and uh... "Less restrictions on things" and that's like...
...government stuff.
I don't think of politics when I hear people say, "Oh, gay people? They're an..."
"...abomination before the Lord!"
That seems like more than political almost.
That's like not a thing you vote on, right?
"What do I say to this abomination before the Lord issue?"
"I wish I had a booklet that would tell me, like, the pros and cons of..."
"...abominations."
So, there's also the idea that, my friend says, "Well I work for a corporation..."
"...that is ultimately..."
"...owned by Rupert Murdoch. Now this guy..."
"...probably doing..."
"...way more..."
"...to...uh...hamper..."
"...marriage equality..."
"...and gay rights in this country."
"So, I mean..."
"...I'm doing that."
"So..."
"...I can still eat those sandwiches, right?"
"I mean now, like, I have to!"
Except, if you're in a weird business like show business...
...where you're not always in 100% control...
...of where you might get employed.
There's a difference between having to put food on the table...
...and having that...
...food come directly from a hate monger.
Like, "Hey, this hate monger gave me some money so I could buy food."
"Why don't I buy hate food with it? Keep it in the family."
"My argument is sound!"
"I should keep eating Chick-fil-A!"
This is like...in a sense...it's the perfect...
...American conundrum...
because it's like, "Ah, you know, we should be moving forward as a country but..."
"...also..."
"...I wanna eat garbage--as much as I can!"
Because another person in the thread was like, "Well, there's other chicken sandwiches out there..."
...and my friend was like, "Not as good though. Not as good."
"You can see the quandry I'm in."
"Operating under the assumption that..."
"...I must eat fried chicken sandwiches. I simply must!"
"Why not treat myself..."
"...to the best one. Oh, look, I'm not crazy about their politics."
"I wish..."
"...they didn't feel that if you..."
"...if you feel like kissing a boy and you're a boy..."
"...you'll be damned to hell for all eternity."
"That's not my favorite thing in the world."
"And you know, every third bite of the chicken sandwich..."
"...that'll pop into my mind. But I'll shake my head while I'm eating it. Like, 'mmm mmmm mmm, no!'"
"I disagree Chick-fil-A!"
"Let's agree to disagree!"
No one is...
...asking you to investigate Coca-Cola or AT&T or...
...anything. No one's asking you to carry a sign in front of Chick-fil-A. They're just saying, "Now that..."
"...you know this sh**,..."
"...don't eat that f**king sandwich anymore! It's that simple." *applause* You can't get it out of your mind. You know it! You know it! You'll always know it!
What? Are you having hypnotherapy?
"Oh, man. I really want Chick-fil-A!"
"I better make an appointment with my hypnotist..."
"...so I can forget I know that they hate gay people."
It's like, "Look, their customer service, they're not discriminating. They're serving gay..."
"...people in the restaurant, so that..."
"...you know. As long as they're not doing that..."
"...I'm fine giving them the money and they can do whatever they want with their..."
"...money."
But it's like, "Noo..."
"You know it. You know it. You can't stop knowing it."
And really...
Don't f**king eat Chick-fil-A. What are you doing? It's garbage. It's garbage! *applause*
Treat yourself better. Even if you're not going to treat...
...other people who don't have the same rights as you better, treat yourself better than that!
Well, I certainly broke some barriers here this evening!
We have a wonderful show for you this evening................ *fade out*