Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
Captioning by Dementis and CaptionTube.
Mario: Hello and welcome to New Super Mario Bros. Wii! Yahoo!
Luigi: Those two Toads, they will not be in this.
Mario: You will miss them, maybe.
Mario: I honestly don't care about them.
Mario: They can go suck on their own toes for all I care.
Luigi: AAAH! They're chasing us, run away!
Mario: Now we're playing a new game. Because this is supposed to be a short playthrough with 2 players.
Mario: How you doin', Luigi? Luigi: I feel small.
Mario: So do I. We need to get some 'shrooms, get high. I mean, big. Yeah!
Luigi: Today is Princess Peach's birthday!
Mario: It is? Who cares about her?
Mario: Look at this, she can't even see that she's gonna get kidnapped.
Luigi: Oh! Oh my god, they killed her! Wait, come back! Mario: I so totally called that!
Mario: Hurray, we're not responsible.
Luigi: Come back here! I want the cake!
Mario: Holy ***! ***'s flying all over the place. [Luigi Panting]
Luigi: Run! Mario: I'm so getting myself that penguin suit.
Luigi: Is that Larry Koopa?
Mario: So where do we go first?
Luigi: Go to the big red dot.
Mario: Which one? There's millions of them. I guess dis one. World 1-1. Why not 0-1? Shouldn't there be a tutorial level?
Luigi: Ah, Mario, don't! Save a power-up for me!
Mario: Hurray! Screw you Luigi, I get my helmet. My Heli-helmet. Woo-hoo! Luigi: Ah, mamma-mia!
Mario: I can fly! I'm gonna go meet Lucy... Luigi: Thief! That was my power-up, I called it! Ahh, Mamma-miaaaaa!
Mario: Get me a mushroom, I'll go see Lucy...in the sky, with diamonds. Luigi: Let me out of here, let me out!
Luigi: Alright! Now we're talking! Mario: Oh, look at that, a giant gold coi-...
Mario: Hey! You got a heli-hat, too. Luigi: Alright, now I got a spin on things.
Luigi: Ow! Mario, that hurt! Mario: You got a spin on things, that's a clever pun.
Luigi: Get the coins. Mario: It sound like a weird pun.
Mario: From some old cartoon. When you got a spin on things, and you got a heli-hat. It's funny, it's a pun. Luigi: I'm gonna beat you, Mario!
Mario: I needed to get that coin. Get back here!
Mario: Haha! I got a 1-up! I are better than you, Luigi. Luigi: Oh yeah! Wait a minute, you sonofa-...Oh, damnit.
Mario: Why are random fireworks going off in the middle of the day just because we completed a level?
Mario: You'd think they would need a permit.
Luigi: And how does pulling down a flag get fireworks? It makes no sense.
Mario: Ooh! Mushroom! Hurray!
Mario: We're getting wasted, I mean...more mushrooms, yeah.
Mario: We're going to a 1-up blast! We need to hit numbers in the sky.
Luigi: I call this one, Mario! Ok. Mario: You go for that, Luigi. I'll watch you fail.
Mario: Ha! You only got one. Damnit, I only got one too. We suck. [Luigi laughing]
Luigi: I should have gotten the end one. Mario: Alright, let's go to World 1-2.
Luigi: Wait, 1-2...or 3-4? Or is it 5-6? Hey, put me down!
Mario: It's 20-21! Get back here, you ***! Luigi: Make me!
Mario: No, I don't make ***, I bury it!
Mario: Oh my god! I'd make an Ice Ice Baby joke, but I don't feel like it. I wanna keep my heli-hat.
Mario: Woo-hoo! I love goombas. If this was an RPG, they'd be free experience points.
Luigi: Oh, Mario. When will we ever get an RPG game?
Mario: Uh, try 10 years ago. We've had one for years, just... Luigi: YOU had one 10 years ago. I had one only 4.
Mario: You...well, you technically had one before that, too. I mean... Luigi: When? When did I have an RPG?
Mario: In Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door. We didn't get to see it, but you talked about it and we saw the partners you had. You had horrible aim, you burned your partner. You threw him in the freakin' lava. That's just mean!
Luigi: That's it, Mario. If you get trapped in a bubble, I'm not letting you out.
Mario: Yeah, y-you...If you get trapped in a bubble, I'll just laugh.
Mario (Lowering pitch): And Laugh, and laugh, and laugh, and laaaa-... Luigi: Well, you do that anyway.
Mario: That was creepy. Luigi: Mario, does my head look like a trampoline?
Luigi: This isn't Bowser's Inside Story. Mario: Looks like a trampoline to me. Look at how huge that head of yours is, anyway.
Mario: Get off my head, you ***! Luigi: Eh, mamma-mia.
Luigi: I got the higher score! Mario: Haha! I still got higher on the pole!
Luigi: I got the 1-up, too! Mario: Yeah, but I still beat you by two lives.