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[door opens]
Mr. Grumberson, there are two more applicants for the sales position job.
Hmm. I deduced that from the last time you came in here and said there were three more applicants.
I was just saying that for the audience's benefit.
What?
Never mind. I'll send him in.
[door opens, footsteps]
Um... Hello.
Hi! Here's my resume!
You're interviewing for the sales position?
Yes.
You didn't wander in from the Long John Silver's down the street?
Bleh! I'm allergic to seafood.
Halloween was months ago.
I'm well aware of that.
I just... Well... wasn't... Never mind.
You don't discriminate against pirates, do ya?
No! No, no, no! We're an equal opportunity employer here! Uh, name?
Chip. Chip Ahoy.
I meant your legal name.
That is my legal name.
I see... How many words a minute do you type?
Three!
Three?
I see... Where did you go to school?
Harvard.
Harvard? Oh, that's very good.
I majored in yelling.
Yelling?
Yes! I know all the good ones!
YARG! and RRGH! and YA! YA! YA! YA! YA!
Wait, wait, wait. They teach yelling at Harvard Business School?
No, Harvard Pirate School.
Mr. Ahoy, what makes you think you're qualified for this sales position job?
I'm not.
Right... You've got the job. What?
This was all just a pretense to get into your office.
This is a mutiny! So hand over the wallet and the watch!
And I'll be taking this, too!
Right! I'm in charge of this company now!
You're gonna walk the plank!
Plank? What plank?
(without pirate accent) Just jump out the window, ok?
(mumbling) ...Ridiculous...
(groans, grunts)
Grumberson (O.S.): AIIIIIGGGHHHHHHHHHH!
[thump]
[door opens]
Mr. Grumberson? Oh, I thought-
I'm Mr. Grumberson! I was on one of them TV makeover shows.
I love television! It's one of my favorites. Can I get you a coffee?
Do you have any grog?
I think we do.
There's one more applicant for the sales position. Would you like me to send him in?
I was planning on playing solitaire for the rest of the day...
But, yeah! Send him in!
Mmkay.
[door opens]
Ah, Mr. Ahoy!
My name's Bradshaw.
It says Ahoy on your resume.
I haven't given you my resume yet.
Ah! This is my resume!
So, Mr. Whoever-You-Are, why do you want to be a salesman for this company?
I don't. This was just a pretense to get into your office.
So I, uh, suppose you want me to jump out the window, then.
Could you?
(sigh) I hate Mondays.
This was brought to you by YARG! Another tale of modern day pirates! Only in graphic novel form!
You should buy it. You'd like it. I mean, it's by the same guy who wrote this thing.