Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
Hey everybody it's Hari Kalymnios here from TheThoughtGym.com and today what I wanted to
talk to you about is this concept that Tony Robbins
likes to call an Emotional Triad. Now, don't get scared, it's got nothing to do with gangsters
or anything like that.
It really is means that there are three elements to controlling
how you feel any given moment in time. And why is that important you my ask?
Well it's important because once you realize that they're really just three
things that control how you feel any given moment in time
it means that by looking at one of those three things you'll be able to change how you
feel.
Let's just go through with an example. The first
of the three things; the first of these Triads, if you like
is that of focus. What are you paying attention to at that moment in time. What is
taking up your focus? In the UK here,
as you know rains a LOT, and let's say
I'm going now and I chose to go out to the park and play frisbee with my friends
but it starts to rain
and I focus on the fact that now I won't be able to go and play frisbee and
now my afternoon's ruined and...all this other stuff. Then I'm going to start to feel pretty lousy
frustrated, blaming the weather, wanting to move to Los Angeles
or somewhere. But if I chose to focus on the fact that actually, you know what it's raining
but that means that I don't have to get up early tomorrow to water the plants and now it
means that I can now do all the jobs around the house that I needed to do that
I've been putting of for so long.
Then I might actually feel a bit grateful that I've got an extra afternoon free,
I've got an extra hour in bed. All manner of things.
Just by switching what I decide to focus on in that situation.
The second part of this Triad, is that of language,
how we talk to ourselves becomes so important to how we feel.
If I start saying to myself, "I feel lousy", "I feel tired", "I'm going to..
sit on the couch, I'm just going to watch TV until it's bedtime"
then I'm going to start to feel pretty lousy, I'm going to sit on the couch and watch TV till bedtime!
But, if I say to myself "you know what? I'm going to go for that run.
I know I'm a bit tired but I know that if I go for that run I'm
going to feel fantastic, yeah let's do it! Just go for that run"
And I go for that run, I know I feel fantastic, I come back
and that's all fine. So the fact is, that what I decide to say to myself will determine
whether
I feel motivated to go for a run, or whether I feel motivated to go sit on the couch!
And the last thing is that of physiology.
Physiology is a fancy word for saying - how we move about really
so how movement, our gestures, our
posture. How we breath, how we're moving, how we're walking, how we're sitting
can determine how we feel. I'm sure you've come across this situation before
where
you made not have felt like doing something and then just by sheer
will of force perhaps you did do something and that the fact you're moving differently
breathing differently felt differently to you. You had a different emotional state.
They, in fact did an experiment. I watch TED recently
where they took a group of
students who were looking for a job and they divided them into two and they instructed one
half to just do a normal interview preparation
and the other half, they had to go into a quiet corner for a bit and get
into some kind of emotion state. Do something with
their body which made them feel more powerful which made them feel
more engaging, more likeable - if you like. Just more confident for that interview.
None of the interviewers, of course, knew
which group had done which, but when asked at the end
all of the interviewer decided that they'd rather give the job to the group that had gone into
state
had taken control of their emotions through their
physiology than those that didn't. It's fascinating. It's like that old saying
that you may have heard.
I don't sing because I'm happy - I'm happy BECAUSE I sing!
It's remarkable because once you realise actually how you move your body, the
actions you take determine how you feel. Next time you wake up and feel lousy like maybe
sometimes you do. And you realise, you know what if I go for a
brisk walk before breakfast I always feel so much better. And you
realise that. You go for that walk, you come to breakfast, you feel fantastic. You're going to start the day off right.
If you know that when you wake up late, you feel
you waddle to the bathroom, then waddle off to the
breakfast bowl and you're going to start to feel lousy all day
and you don't break your state you don't change your physiology or at least what you focus on or your
language then you'll feel lousy all day. It sounds really simple just these three things control
your emotional state, and you know what I think that we
have a tendency to make life more complicated than it needs to be
let's just keep it simple embrace simplicity
and look for those three things in your every day
emotional states and what is it you can change to provide you with a
better emotional state. Ok, that's it for now
please like, share, subscribe to the channel:
comment. I love to hear from you. Also visit
TheThoughtGym.com. Pop your name on the waiting list to
receive free training videos when they become available for you
and I will see you on the next one. Have a fantastic week!
Take care.