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[MUSIC: "At Launch" by Kevin MacLeod: A suspenseful and uplifting military musical piece]
Right troops, listen in; another campaign. We've never been found wanting,
despite the fact our numbers have been reduced by over 20% I know you'll face the challange.
We could probably only campaign on two fronts.
Team A will be located at the top of the hill.
Team B will set up position in the town centre.
I know some will find yet another campaign a strain,
I also know you'll do your best.
Vetrans are relying on you to make this our greatest campaign;
"Operation Poppy Day".
It's essential that we raise donations as there's an increase in needy vetrans.
Be polite, no shaking of the collection cans and above all remember we can't pin poppies on public persons.
Why not?
Because of health and safety reasons, they have not carried out a risk assessment on the pins.
I don't believe it, we never had health and safety on D-Day.
Why should we have it on P-Day? We never had it in Korea, or Palestine.
I don't know about you mate, but we didn't have that problem in Cyprus or Aden. Terrible.
Well don't worry about it guys because I think we've got a solution.
We've got one of our boffins working night and day on solving the problem.
GREETER: Welcome to the Tesco poppy appeal.
COMRADE: Oh, thank you very much!
CUSTOMER: Can you pin the poppy on for me please?
COMRADE: I'm sorry, I can't do that; health and safety.
[MUSIC: "Running Fanfare" by Kevin MacLeod: A short brass and drum fanfare]
But I can do it for you!
CUSTOMER: Oh that's great!
NARRATOR: In all seriousness
the veterans have never needed your support more than they need it now.
Please give generously to this year's poppy appeal.
[MUSIC: "The Last Post"]