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I don't expect my love to stand up for herself
If I didn't hold her up she would fall
for she doesn't have long legs, she doesn't have short legs
she doesn't have legs at all
I don't expect my love to reach out and hold my hand
but that's not to say she's charmless
Some people say bad things about my girl without limbs
but I think she's perfectly 'armless
There's nothing like the love of a quadruple amputee
I know that my flightless angel will never walk out on me
My dismembered valentine
Hold your bleeding torso close to mine
Stack all your limbs in one straight line
My dismembered valentine
My dismembered valentine
Your wounds gush blood like sweet red wine
but I can patch you up with cotton and twine
My dismembered valentine
I love dancing with her and trying to picture
the remaining ten percent of her hips
The only thing amiss is that she never gives me kisses
but I never really found her lips
I kept her upright with pins 'til rigor mortis settled in
so you'll never find her slouched or slumped
Some people disapprove but if you asked us why they do
we honestly would be stumped
As many couples grow older
their passion ceases to smoulder
but our love grows bolder each time that I hold her
she never gives me the cold shoulder
My dismembered valentine
When you pirouette you look so fine
spinning around on the base of your spine
My dismembered valentine
My dismembered valentine
Your flesh smells like it's in decline
I'll have to add formaldehyde to your brine
My dismembered valentine
My dismembered valentine
You don't need hands or feet to look divine
The maggot eggs give your skin a dazzling shine
My dismembered valentine
My dismembered valentine
Sweet mutilated valentine
If you had a head, I'm sure you'd say you were mine
My dismembered valentine