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HOUSEWIVES OF MIAMI"...
- THANK YOU. - YOU LOOK WONDERFUL.
- MAMACITA, DARLING!
- HELLO-- CLASS?
- THE PARTY HAS NOW STARTED!
- I DON'T FEEL LIKE SHE'S TRYING TO BE NICE.
IT'S VERY RUDE.
- HOW MANY TIMES DID YOU COOK IN THE LAST THREE WEEKS?
- ZERO-- HOW MANY TIMES DID YOU GO
DO GROCERY IN THE LAST THREE WEEKS?
ZERO, RIGHT-- ZERO.
- I DON'T CARE WHAT ROMAIN SAYS.
HE TAKES IT OR LEAVES IT-- IT'S MY SISTER.
- THEY'RE ASKING ME ABOUT YOUR BOYFRIEND.
WAS HE TEXTING YOU? - HE TEXTS ME A LOT, YEAH.
- YOU KNOW WHAT?
I THINK THIS IS ALL CHILDISH-- I DON'T STOOP TO THAT LEVEL.
- WE DON'T MARRY, OBVIOUSLY, WE HAVE A PROBLEM.
IT'S BEEN FIVE YEARS-- I'M NOT GETTING ANY YOUNGER.
- WHY WOULD YOU PUT A CONTRACT ON LOVE?
- IT'S EITHER BREAK UP OR MARRIAGE, I MEAN--
- WHY? - BECAUSE THAT'S MY TERMS.
- WE'VE BEEN POSTPONING OUR MARRIAGE FOR FIVE YEARS.
[indistinct]
- I'M A MODEL, BUT NOT ALWAYS A MODEL CITIZEN.
- IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY SMILE, THEN DON'T LOOK MY WAY.
- MY HUSBAND'S A TOP PLASTIC SURGEON IN THIS TOWN,
AND I'M HIS BEST CREATION.
- I MAY SPEAK FIVE LANGUAGES,
BUT MY TRUE LANGUAGE IS INDEPENDENCE.
- MY JOB IS ABOUT MAKING FAST DECISIONS,
BUT MY PERSONAL LIFE, I LEAVE UP TO DESTINY.
- WHETHER IN THE COURTROOM OR IN THE KITCHEN,
I BRING THE HEAT.
- I CAN DEAL WITH A LOT,
BUT I CAN'T DEAL WITH STUPID.
- WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS WORKING?
- NO!
NO-- LET'S PLAY.
BABY, COME ON.
DO THIS LATER. - BABY, I HAVE TO SEND E-MAIL.
- DO THIS LATER.
WHY ARE YOU SO LAME?
- CAN YOU RELAX?
LAY DOWN. - NO.
THIS IS... NOT FUN.
- Y-YOU'RE ACTING LIKE A KID.
- SO?
NOW, I FORGOT WHAT I WAS SAYING.
- I'M NOT GONNA LIE.
WE'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH A ROUGH ROAD
IN OUR RELATIONSHIP,
AND I THINK IT'S JUST BECAUSE,
YOU KNOW, HE'S SO STRESSED WITH WORK.
BUT, WE LOVE EACH OTHER, WE WANT IT TO WORK,
AND I'LL DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO MAKE IT BETTER.
BABY, DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW MANY MEN
WOULD WANNA BE IN YOUR POSITION RIGHT NOW?
[sighs]
- JO, CAN YOU COME HERE FOR A SECOND?
- GO DO YOUR EMAILS.
- THANK YOU. - ADIOS.
- YOU LOOK GOOD, BABY!
- OKAY.
- HEY. - HEY.
WHAT'S UP?
- UM, SO, I WAS-I WAS TALKING WITH LISA--
- MMM-HMM. - AT THE BILTMORE.
I DON'T THINK YOU'RE GONNA REALLY LIKE THIS.
SHE ACTUALLY OFFERED FOR ME TO MOVE IN WITH HER.
- WAIT-WAIT-WAIT-- I'M SORRY, MARTA.
YOU'RE MY SISTER-- YOU'RE NOT HER SISTER.
HELLO? - OKAY, CAN I EXPLAIN, PLEASE?
CAN I EXPLAIN?
I THINK THIS WILL BE THE BEST FOR ALL OF US,
JUST BECAUSE--
'CAUSE ROMAIN'S BEEN ACTING REALLY SHADY WITH ME.
DO YOU KNOW HOW AWKWARD IT IS
TO LIVE WITH SOMEBODY WHO HATES YOU?
- HE DOESN'T HATE YOU, MARTA-- HE'S REALLY STRESSED.
- YEAH. - LIKE, EVEN TO ME,
HE'S BEEN A LITTLE DISTANT.
ROMAIN AND MARTA HAVE BEEN BUTTING HEADS SO MUCH.
IT'S DRIVING ME CRAZY.
BUT, IT'S NEVER BEEN THIS INTENSE.
MAYBE HE'S FEELING FRUSTRATED WITH WHAT'S GOING ON
BETWEEN ME AND HIM,
AND HE'S KINDA TAKING IT OUT ON HER.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON WITH HIM,
BECAUSE HE DOESN'T REALLY CARE TO GET MARRIED ANYMORE.
SO, I'M HOPING THAT IT'S THE WHOLE STRESS
WITH THE "MYNT" TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY.
AND, ALSO, HE'S GETTING HIS CITIZENSHIP.
- I'M SORRY-- I'M NOT--
- BUT MOVING OUT IS NOT THE ANSWER.
- I THINK IT IS-- I REALLY DO THINK IT IS.
- I'VE BEEN GOOD.
- I KNOW, BABY.
RODOLFO SPENDS MOST OF HIS TIME TRAVELING,
BECAUSE HE'S A LATIN SOAP STAR AND ACTOR.
SO, OUR RELATIONSHIP IS BASED A LOT ON SKYPE.
I MISS YOU. - I MISS YOU, TOO.
YOU WANNA TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED THE OTHER DAY?
- ADRIANA CAME UP TO ME, AND SHE GOES, "KARENT, KARENT!
"I NEED TO SPEAK TO YOU, RIGHT NOW."
SUPPOSEDLY, ANA WAS SAYING THAT YOU AND I
WERE MAKE-BELIEVE BOYFRIEND AND GIRLFRIEND.
- THAT'S ALL B.S. - IT IS B.S.,
BUT SHE'S SAYING, "OH, YOU KNOW,
"I'M GETTING ALL THESE MESSAGES FROM RODOLFO, ON FACEBOOK,
"AND HE'S ALWAYS TEXTING ME.
"LOOK, IF YOU WANT, I CAN TAKE MY PHONE OUT
"AND SHOW YOU TEXTS."
AND I GO, "YOU KNOW WHAT, ANA?
"I DON'T NEED TO SEE YOUR PHONE.
"RODOLFO AND I ARE SO HONEST WITH EACH OTHER."
YOU KNOW, I AM VERY SECURE AS A WOMAN.
I AM VERY SECURE IN MY RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU.
- BABY, LISTEN TO ME.
I DON'T WANNA HEAR ANYMORE OF THESE STUPID STORIES.
YOU-YOU HAVE TO STAND UP FOR YOURSELF.
AND NEXT TIME YOU ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF THESE SNAKES,
THE FIRST WORD THAT THEY TELL YOU,
YOU STEP UP, AND YOU GET AWAY FROM THERE.
- YOU OBVIOUSLY HAVE THIS CHARISMA,
[chuckling] THAT ALL THESE WOMEN ARE FALLING IN LOVE WITH YOU.
RODOLFO MADE ME FEEL SO MUCH MORE COMFORTABLE,
BECAUSE HE HAS NOTHING TO HIDE.
AND THE FACT THAT HE WANTS ME TO FEEL CONFIDENT
IN OUR RELATIONSHIP REALLY HELPS,
BECAUSE HAVING THIS RELATIONSHIP LONG-DISTANCE
IS DIFFICULT. - YOU KNOW WHAT?
I ALWAYS DREAM ABOUT HAVING A HAREM.
- A HAREM-- YEAH. - LET'S DO IT.
THAT SOUNDS SO INTERESTING.
[laughing]
- IT'S LOOKING GREAT.
I LOVE THAT PIECE OF THE EIFFEL TOWERS.
- HE'S ALSO A FRENCH ARTIST.
- OH, WOW!
I LOVE THIS PIECE. - YEAH.
- GORGEOUS. - WE WANT TO TOUCH THE--
[chuckles] - FOR GOOD LUCK.
- FOR GOOD LUCK-- EXACTLY. - FOR GOOD LUCK.
I'VE BEEN WORKING IN THE ART FIELD, IN MIAMI,
FOR ABOUT SEVEN YEARS, AND I'M REALLY HAPPY
THE WAY MY CAREER IS GOING, RIGHT NOW.
I HAVE AN ART GALLERY IN THE DESIGN DISTRICT.
THE HOTTEST PLACE MIAMI HAS RIGHT NOW, FOR ART AND DESIGN.
SO, I'LL SEND ALL THE INVITATIONS
TO MY CLIENT LIST.
- HOW MANY INVITATIONS DO YOU NEED ON YOUR SIDE?
BECAUSE I'M GONNA PRINT THEM.
- WELL, YOU KNOW, THAT'S-THAT'S THE THING.
IN MY EXPERIENCE, IN THE PAST,
I HAVE HAD SO MANY ART OPENINGS
WHERE THE CROWD THAT SHOWS UP,
IT'S MOSTLY PEOPLE THAT COME IN
FOR A FREE GLASS OF CHAMPAGNE AND JUST FOR ENTERTAINMENT.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? - YEAH.
- NOW, THIS TIME, I WANNA DRIVE BUSINESS AND HAVE SALES.
ART RUNS IN MY VEINS.
IT'S PART OF WHO I AM.
I WENT TO THE UNIVERSITY OF PARIS-SORBONNE,
AND I THINK I'M DOING WHAT I WAS SUPPOSED TO DO.
SO, I'M THINKING, LESS PEOPLE.
WE'RE TARGETING THE COLLECTORS.
THE PEOPLE THAT REALLY, REALLY APPRECIATING ART,
BUT ALSO BUYING ART, BECAUSE, AFTER ALL,
YOU KNOW, WE'RE IN THE BUSINESS OF ART DEALING.
- OKAY, GREAT-- I'M SO EXCITED!
- I AM, TOO. - THANK YOU.
THANK YOU-- NOW, BACK TO WORK.
- COME HERE.
COME.
GOOD BOY.
SIT DOWN.
GOOD BOY.
- HI, MY LISA. - HI.
- I HAVE A DRINK FOR YOU. - WHAT'S IN THIS?
- IT'S A LITTLE *** AND RED BULL.
- NICE.
[laughing]
- YES. - I'M READY.
- YOU ARE THE PRINCESS OF THE HOUSE.
- I AM THE PRINCESS OF THE HOUSE.
- YES, YOU ARE THE PRINCESS-- YOU ARE SO LUCKY.
- GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE,
AND GOOD THINGS ARE GONNA HAPPEN TO YOU,
AND THEY ALREADY ARE. - YEAH, I KNOW!
I'M HAPPY AFTER MY SURGERY, MISS LISA.
- THE DAY YOU CAME TO US, YOU'RE LIKE, "I WANT SURGERY!"
IS THAT WHY YOU STARTED WORKING FOR US?
'CAUSE YOU WANTED SURGERY?
YOU KNEW THIS DAY WAS GONNA COME?
- NO-NO, NEVER, NEVER.
- YOU WERE BUTTERING ME UP TO GET SURGERY?
SO, IN ORDER FOR DAYSY TO GET SURGERY,
SHE NEEDS TO LOSE A SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF WEIGHT.
IT'S GONNA TAKE TIME, BUT SHE'S ON HER WAY.
[cell phone ringing]
HELLO?
- HELLO, SEXY MAMA! - HEY, BABE, HOW ARE YOU?
- THAT'S AMAZING ACCOMPLISHMENT, GIRL.
- I WILL BE THERE, FOR SURE.
IT'S A BIG DEAL TO HAVE A NIGHTCLUB, IN MIAMI,
FOR TEN YEARS.
AND THE FACT THAT ROMAIN HAS KEPT "MYNT" ALIVE AND STRONG
IS AN AMAZING ACCOMPLISHMENT.
ACTUALLY, WHY DON'T YOU GUYS COME OVER,
YOU AND ALL THE GIRLS,
AND I'LL HAVE A LITTLE, UH, SUSHI PRE-PARTY
BEFORE THE "MYNT" PARTY.
- SHE DIDN'T-- HER ASSISTANT INVITED ME.
DID SHE INVITE YOU HERSELF? - SHE DID.
- WELL, THERE YOU GO.
- OKAY, BABE, LOVE YOU-- BYE.
I'LL SEE YOU SOON. - LOVE YOU.
- BYE. - BYE, HONEY.
- I'M A LITTLE TIPSY.
WHAT THE HELL DID YOU PUT IN THIS DRINK, DAYSY?
- DOUBLE SHOT-- YOU WANT MORE?
- NO! - IT'S OKAY?
- DAYSY AND I SPEND SO MUCH TIME TOGETHER
THAT, SOMETIMES, MOST OF THE TIME,
SHE'S NOT EVEN WORKING.
WE'RE JUST KINDA HANGING OUT AND TALKING ABOUT LIFE,
WHICH IS FUN.
I ALMOST HIRE HER TO BE MY COMPANION.
[laughing] SHE'S LIKE A PAID FRIEND.
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE SUN?
THIS IS BULL[deleted]. - [indistinct]
- I'M ACTING LIKE A ***, NOW.
- NO, MISS LISA.
YOU'RE RELAXED-- THAT'S A GOOD THING.
- I'M DRUNK, NOW. - DO YOU HAVE SOME LIPSTICK?
- I NEED LIPSTICK? - YOU NEED A LITTLE LIPSTICK.
- THANKS FOR LOOKING OUT FOR ME, DAYSY.
- OF COURSE.
- COMING UP... - BABY, PLEASE?
OH, MY GOD-- BABY, STOP.
BABY, STOP-- OH, MY GOD!
[laughing] - I'M AMERICAN.
I CAN SPEED.
- RJ? - WHAT?
- WHAT-- IN FIVE MINUTES,
COME UP TO FREDA'S APARTMENT.
- OKAY.
- OH-- THE TWO OF THEM.
FREDITA!
FREDA'S BEEN AROUND A LONG TIME.
FREDITA!
AND, I MEAN, SHE DOESN'T REALLY WORK FOR ME.
I REALLY KINDA WORK FOR HER.
- WOW. - I SAID I'D DO YOUR HAIR.
BRING THE STUFF, THE BALLS AND THE COMB.
[indistinct]
- NO, BRING THE STUFF, RIGHT NOW.
THE BALLS. - OH!
[laughing]
- MY SON LOVES HER, MY DOGS LOVE HER.
SHE COULDN'T BE MORE LOYAL.
AND, SHE'S ALWAYS THERE IF WE NEED ANYTHING,
BUT SHE TAKES FULL ADVANTAGE OF THE FACT THAT,
MOST THE TIME, WE DON'T.
- BOLITAS. - I'M GONNA TRY TO DO IT NOW.
- BOLITAS, BOLITAS,
BOLITAS, BOLITAS, BOLITAS.
- I HAVE A MILLION THINGS TO DO,
INCLUDING MY MEETING FOR THE VOLUNTEERS FOR THE GALA.
AND, OF COURSE, ROMAIN AND JOANNA
INVITED ME TO THE TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF "MYNT."
SO, THERE'S A LOT GOING ON,
BUT I'M NOT GONNA MISS THE PARTY.
SO, YOU'RE NOT GONNA CLEAN?
USTED NO LIMPIO? - NO.
- NO. - NO.
NO-- YOU'RE NOT GONNA DO THE LAUNDRY?
- NO.
- SO, YOU'RE JUST GONNA REST? - YEAH.
- FREDA ANSWERS THE PHONE WHEN SHE WANTS TO.
SHE SPEAKS ENGLISH WHEN SHE WANTS TO.
SHE LEAVES THE RADIO ON, ON A SPANISH STATION,
TWENTY-FOUR HOURS A DAY, IN EVERY ROOM OF THE HOUSE,
UNTIL I GO AROUND AND UNPLUG IT.
PORQUE USTED NO LIMPIO?
WHY DON'T YOU HAVE TO CLEAN?
[laughing]
YOU LIKE IT? - YEAH.
- SHE HAS HER OWN COMPUTER,
HER OWN PHONE, HER OWN ALARM SYSTEM,
HER OWN SAFE, HER OWN BEDROOM, HER OWN BATHROOM,
HER OWN KITCHEN, AND HER OWN STORAGE UNIT.
A DRIVER, TWO PART-TIME HOUSEKEEPERS.
AND, UM, I'D SAY SHE'S WORKED HERSELF
INTO A NICE POSITION IN LIFE.
ESTA BIEN? - PERFECT-- YEAH.
- MY DAY BASICALLY CONSISTS OF TAKING CARE OF HER.
WE'RE GONNA PRACTICE THE SWIMMING.
FREDA DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO SWIM.
- AY-YI-YI. - TEACH FREDA HOW TO SWIM.
FR-FREDA, JUST PRACTICANDO-- DON'T GO VERY FAR.
NO-NO-NO-NO-NO, RJ.
RIGHT HERE, WHERE THE SHALLOW END.
I DON'T WANNA HAVE TO JUMP IN AND GET HER.
FREDA, HOW COME SHE DON'T EVEN HAVE A SWIMSUIT ON.
- SHE DIDN'T HAVE ONE,
AND THIS IS THE CLOSEST THING.
YOU NEVER BOUGHT HER ONE.
- I'M NOT RESPONSIBLE TO BUY HER CLOTHES!
SHE CAN BUY A SWIMSUIT.
FREDA, PRACTICANDO.
- OKAY, OKAY. - RJ, SHOW HER HOW TO SWIM.
OH, DON'T GET YOUR HAIR WET.
I JUST DID HER HAIR, RJ.
I DON'T WANNA DO THE HAIR AGAIN.
- OH, FINE. - FREDA?
- OKAY, [indistinct].
[speaking Spanish]
- THAT'S NOT BAD!
- SHE'S-- - SHE'S DOING BETTER!
- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, SHE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO SWIM?
- SHE'S DOING GOOD.
BRAVISSIMO!
- FREDA!
[laughing]
FREDA HAS MANAGED TO LIVE
THIS LIFE OF A QUEEN.
I MEAN, WHO GETS TO DO THAT?
GOOD JOB, FREDA!
- HOW ARE YOU? - HI, BILL.
- GOOD TO SEE YOU, HONEY. - NICE TO SEE YOU.
THIS IS CHARLY.
HI-- CHARLY. - HEY, I'M BILL-- ALL RIGHT.
I WANTED TO EXPLAIN HOW THE STORY WORKS.
- OKAY. - UM, IT'S, BASICALLY,
"A DAY IN THE LIFE" STORY. - YEAH.
- SO, WE WANNA CAPTURE THE ENERGY AND THE VIBE,
AND WHAT IT'S LIKE TO RUN AROUND WITH MARYSOL.
- YOU SURE YOU'RE READY FOR THAT?
[laughing]
- I AM TOTALLY READY FOR THIS.
I BROUGHT MY HELMET.
UM, WE WANTED TO FOLLOW YOU
BECAUSE YOU'RE A BIT OF AN ANOMALY--
- OH, THANK YOU. - WHICH MAKES YOU INTERESTING.
- I LOVE BEING AN ANOMALY, IN THE GOOD SENSE.
- RIGHT, RIGHT.
YOU KNOW A TON OF PEOPLE IN MIAMI.
YOU'RE A GIRL ABOUT TOWN. - OKAY.
- AND YOU HAVE A SUCCESSFUL BUSINESS.
WE WANNA EXPLORE THAT AND SEE HOW THAT WORKS.
- WELL, I'M HONORED. - COOL, COOL.
- AND I'M SO EXCITED IT'S WITH YOU,
'CAUSE, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE MY FAVORITE AT "OCEAN DRIVE."
- AM I-I'M YOUR FAVORITE-- OKAY, GOOD.
- YEAH, YOU'RE MY FAVORITE.
"OCEAN DRIVE" MAGAZINE HAS DECIDED TO PROFILE
ME AND MY COMPANY, "THE PATTON GROUP,"
ABOUT OUR TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY.
HONESTLY, I COULD DO A LOT WORSE
THAN SPENDING MY DAY WITH BILL,
ASKING ME QUESTIONS ABOUT ME-ME-ME-ME-ME.
LOOK AT HOW LUCKY WE ARE, WITH TWO SUCH HANDSOME MEN
TO HAVE A MEETING WITH. - YOU'RE FLIRTING ALREADY.
- I'M NOT FLIRTING-- IT'S FACT.
- IT'S PART OF YOUR JOB, I THINK.
- IT'S NOT PART OF MY JOB.
- SO, BILL, HAS MARYSOL FILLED YOU IN
ON THE EVENT THAT SHE'S DOING HERE?
- A LITTLE BIT. - A LITTLE BIT.
- I KINDA JUST LET HIM KNOW THAT IT'S, LIKE--
OUR LIFE BRAND EVENT.
THAT IT'S GONNA BE HAPPENING AT THE SAME NIGHT,
AT 150 DIFFERENT RENAISSANCE HOTELS,
AND THE REST-- I NEED INFO. - RIGHT.
- SO, REALLY, WHAT WE'RE DOING IS,
WE'RE SETTING OFF THIS LIMELIGHT OF DISCOVERY.
YOU KNOW, LIKE, WHAT'S UNIQUE AND INDIGENOUS
IN EACH OF THE AREAS, UM, FOR WHICH THE--
OUR RENAISSANCE BRANDS EXIST. - ALL RIGHT.
- SO, HERE IN MIAMI BEACH-- - RIGHT-- IT'S BAL HARBOUR.
- OBVIOUSLY, BAL HARBOUR IS HUGE.
WE WANT OUR BRANDS TO BE AFFILIATED
WITH BRANDS LIKE "SAKS" AND "AUDI."
- "THE PATTON GROUP" REPRESENTS LUXURY BRANDS,
LIFESTYLE BRANDS, ENTERTAINMENT BRANDS.
YOU NAME IT-- I'VE PROBABLY WORKED WITH 'EM,
AT SOME POINT OR ANOTHER.
WHERE ARE YOU PLANNING TO HAVE THE EVENT?
ARE WE GONNA-WHAT-WHAT--
- WE'RE GONNA DO IT ON THE SPA GARDEN.
SHOULD WE HEAD OUT TO THE-- - YEAH-YEAH-YEAH.
LET'S DO THAT. - YOU WANNA HEAD OUT?
- YEAH, LET'S DO IT. - GREAT.
- OH, THIS IS GOOD. - YEAH, IT'S IDEAL.
- OKAY, STAGE, BAND, OVER THERE.
KIOSKS OVER HERE. - YEAH.
- THEN WE SHOULD PUT THE STEP AND REPEAT OVER THERE,
SO THAT EVERYBODY COMES THROUGH THE RESTAURANT AND--
- PERFECT.
- LET'S JUST GET ALL THE LOGOS FOR THE STEP AND REPEAT
TO CHARLY, AND WE'LL GO FROM THERE.
- OF COURSE. - IT'S GONNA BE BEAUTIFUL.
IT'S GONNA BE AWESOME-- IT'S ALWAYS AWESOME.
- THAT'S FINE BECAUSE, TODAY,
I'M BECOMING AN AMERICAN CITIZEN,
AND I'M THROWING A PARTY.
- WELL, IT'S THE TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY, AT "MYNT."
- YEP, TEN YEAR OF A-OF A DREAM ACCOMPLISHED-- WOW.
- AND YOU'VE HAD IT FOR HOW MANY YEARS?
SIX, FIVE? - "MYNT?"
I BOUGHT IT FIVE-SIX YEARS AGO. - IT WAS RIGHT BEFORE ME.
BEFORE WE MET. - SIX YEARS AGO.
OH, LET ME SHOW YOU SOME AMERICAN DREAM.
- NO!
ROMAIN WAS BORN IN FRANCE.
HE IMMIGRATED, JUST LIKE I DID,
AND TODAY'S A HUGE DAY.
HE'S GETTING HIS CITIZENSHIP, PLUS, YOU KNOW,
TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF HIS CLUB.
THIS TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY IS SUCH A BIG DEAL
AND I'M SO PROUD OF HIM BECAUSE FOR A CLUB--
ESPECIALLY IN MIAMI TO LAST TEN YEARS,
IT'S LIKE YOU WIN THE LOTTERY-- IT'S HUGE.
[laughing]
DO THE AMERICANA DANCE!
- I'M AMERICANO! - HI, BABY.
- HI, HONEY.
- HOW WAS IT? - IT WAS GOOD.
- YEAH? - IT WAS BIG, IT WAS BIG.
I-I CRIED AT THE-- - YOU DID?
- THE NATIONAL ANTHEM-- YEAH, THAT WAS-THAT WAS--
- DID YOU KNOW IT ALL, OR DID YOU FAKE IT?
- I WAS READING THE WORDS ON THE TV.
- HOW WAS THE TEST?
WAS THE TEST EASY? - I DON'T CARE ANYMORE.
I CAN'T BE DEPORTED. - OH, NO, I CAN'T DEPORT YOU.
DAMN IT!
- IT'S ACTUALLY FUNNY TO BE-- - YOU GOT YOUR CARD?
- LEAVING THE OFFICE IN A FERRARI, BUT, OH, WELL.
- TRUE, AND YOU WOULD'VE NEVER MET ME.
[laughing]
- SO, WHEN PEOPLE MEET YOU, ARE YOU GONNA SAY,
"I'M AMERICAN,"
OR ARE YOU STILL GONNA SAY YOU'RE FRENCH?
- WELL, NOW I'M NO LONGER FRENCH-- NO.
WHEN YOU SWEAR-- - REALLY?
I STILL SAY I'M POLISH.
- NO, I-I WOULD SAY I'M AMERICAN.
BUT WHENEVER YOU SWEAR,
YOU-YOU GIVE UP THE RIGHTS OF ANY OTHER COUNTRY,
AS A CITIZEN. - WELL, I DON'T.
I'M VERY PROUD TO BE POLISH, BUT A VERY--
- I'M AMERICAN ALL THE WAY. - I'M A VERY PROUD ***,
LIVING IN AMERICA,
BUT I'LL ALWAYS ADMIT I'M POLISH.
- I WAS BORN IN FRANCE, BUT I'M AMERICAN.
[laughing]
- NO-- HEY-HEY-HEY!
NOW THAT YOU'RE A CITIZEN, YOU CANNOT SPEED WITH ME,
UNLESS YOU WANT ME TO GET A HEART ATTACK, BABY.
- NO, I-I-I-- - I'M SERIOUS-- COME ON, BABY.
BABY, I'M SERIOUS-- PLEASE?
WITH ROMAIN, HE CAME FROM NOTHING,
AND THERE WERE DAYS WHERE HE TOLD ME, YOU KNOW,
THERE WAS WEEKENDS WHERE HE HAD NO FOOD.
LIKE, HE DIDN'T KNOW WHERE HIS NEXT MEAL
WAS GONNA COME FROM.
- THIS IS CRAZY.
- I GOT IT WHEN MY MOM-- WHEN I WAS A KID.
ROMAIN AND I ARE VERY SIMILAR.
I IMMIGRATED FROM POLAND WITH MY MOM,
WHEN I WAS FIVE YEARS OLD.
SO, WE BOTH CAME FROM NOTHING.
WE BOTH HAD TO WORK OUR BUTTS OFF.
- I CAME HERE WITH MAYBE, LIKE, 1,000 BUCKS,
WHICH I SPENT IN TWO MONTHS.
- YEAH, MY MOM CAME WITH 200, FROM POLAND.
- AND $1,000, FOR ME, WAS A FORTUNE.
I WAS A BARTENDER, I BECAME A MANAGER.
NO, I BECAME A WAITER, I BECAME A MANAGER,
BECAME A HOST, BECAME A DIRECTOR.
THEN, I BECAME OWNER, AND NOW, I'M AMERICAN.
I FEEL LIKE, UH-UH-UH, TODAY WAS THE REWARD
FOR SO MANY YEARS OF HARD WORK.
I HAVE TO CELEBRATE. - OH, MY GOD-- BABY, STOP!
BABY, SERIOUSLY! - AMERICA!
- AHH!
BABY, PLEASE?
OH, MY GOD-- BABY, STOP.
BABY, SERIOUSLY-- BABY, STOP!
OH, MY GOD-- BABY, STOP IT, RIGHT NOW!
[laughing] - I'M AMERICAN!
I CAN SPEED.
- COMING UP... - SHE LOOKS GREAT.
- WHO-- ELSA LOOKS GREAT?
- YEAH, FOR HER AGE. - SHE'S IN HER 70's.
- SHE'S IN HER 70's. - I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT.
- UH, LIKE, RIGHT H-HERE.
WAIT, LET'S MOVE IT-- NO, RIGHT HERE,
RIGHT HERE, RIGHT HERE.
MOVE IT OVER THERE.
TWO MORE CHAIRS HERE!
- HEY, BEAUTIFUL. - HEY, ADRIANA, HOW ARE YOU?
- SO, TONIGHT, I'M HAVING A MEETING
WITH THE VOLUNTEERS FOR THE BLACKS' ANNUAL GALA.
SO, I RECRUITED LISA AND JOANNA,
AND I FULLY INTEND TO HAVE THEM VOLUNTEER
TO BUY A TABLE, SELL A TABLE,
BRING SOME AUCTION ITEMS,
AND ANYTHING ELSE I CAN GET THEM TO COMMIT TO.
HI!
MY GIRLS MADE IT!
- HOW ARE YOU? - HI, HONEY.
- YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL.
- LEA, RIGHT NOW, ISN'T MY FAVORITE PERSON,
BUT WE'RE GONNA BE NEIGHBORS.
SO, I AM TRYING TO MAKE AN EFFORT WITH LEA.
[sighs]
- OKAY, EVERYBODY!
TONIGHT, WE ARE HOW MANY DAYS AWAY FROM THE GALA?
THREE WEEKS OR LESS?
ABOUT THREE AND A HALF WEEKS?
WHO'S COUNTING?
OH, WAIT-- STOP, TIME OUT.
GRAND ENTRANCE.
[collective murmuring]
- SORRY I'M LATE-- I'M UNDERDRESSED.
- COME SIT DOWN.
I DON'T WANNA INTERRUPT A DIVA, WHEN A DIVA WALKS IN.
- WELL, SHALL I WALK OUT?
- NO-- HAVE A SEAT, SWEETIE.
- WHEN ELAINE CAME IN, SHE TOTALLY REMINDED ME OF LEA.
LIKE, I THINK IT'S, LIKE,
A LEA IN A MAN'S BODY, OBVIOUSLY, IN DRAG, BUT--
- THAT'S LEA'S ALTER EGO. - YEAH.
- ELAINE IS LEA'S GOOD FRIEND, AND SHE'S A CHARACTER,
YOU KNOW?
SHE DRESSES UP IN OUTRAGEOUS OUTFITS,
AND SHE'S ABOUT NINE FEET TALL,
AND SHE CAN BE VERY IN YOUR FACE,
AND YOU DON'T WANNA CROSS ELAINE.
- SO, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO FOR THE CHARITY THIS YEAR?
[laughing]
- I NEED YOU TO WALK THE RED CARPET AND BE FABULOUS.
- SHE WOULDN'T LET ME ON THE RED CARPET LAST YEAR.
SHE SAID THAT IT WAS OVER. - OH, THAT'S NOT--
YOU'RE-YOU'RE ALWAYS ON THE RED CARPET.
WELL, YOU'RE ON IT.
WELL, WE HAVE, UH-- - I WASN'T GONNA COME--
- THIS YEAR, WE'RE USING THE PEOPLE WHO WE--
THE PEOPLE THAT DO THE GRAMMYS AND THE EMMYS.
- I THINK YOU'RE RIGHT-- A LONG TIME, YEAH.
OKAY, ALL RIGHT.
THAT WON'T HAPPEN, AGAIN.
- I REALLY DON'T KNOW THE HISTORY BETWEEN THESE WOMEN.
ALL I KNOW, IS THAT IT'S INCREDIBLY AWKWARD.
- NOTHING REA-- ASK JAMES.
ASK JAMES-- I WASN'T THERE. - OH, LAST YEAR?
LAST YEAR, I GOT THERE, AND MARYSOL SAID, "STOP."
I SAID, "I'M WANNA GO SAY HI TO LEA."
SHE SAYS, "NO, YOU CAN'T GO ON THE RED CARPET YET."
I SAID, "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?"
AND THEN-- - WAS SHE WAITING
FOR, LIKE, OTHER PEOPLE? - WELL, SHE MADE ME WAIT
AND KEPT PUTTING PEOPLE IN FRONT OF ME.
- YEAH, BUT YOU CAN'T LET IN THE THOUSAND PEOPLE
THAT GO TO THE GALA. - YEAH.
NO, IT WAS COMPLETELY PERSONAL.
IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU-- IT'S ABOUT THE CHARITY.
- YEAH, YEAH-- SO, THAT'S WHY SHE'S NOT IN THIS?
- I HOPE SHE'S NOT INVOLVED THIS YEAR.
- ELAINE LANCASTER, IN THIS TOWN,
IS VERY POPULAR AND VERY WELL-RESPECTED.
SO, MARYSOL NEEDS TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE NICE WITH HIM,
NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND.
- ARE YOU STILL WEARING THE-THE PINK DRESS?
- [indistinct]-- I LOOK LIKE CRAP.
- YEAH, I WAS ABOUT TO SAY,
YOU HAVE, LIKE, RED BAGS UNDER YOUR EYES.
HAVE YOU BEEN CRYING?
- WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?
- FOR REAL, HAVE YOU BEEN CRYING?
- MARK.
- MARK? - YEAH.
SO, I KNOW TONIGHT'S SUPPOSED TO BE A BIG DEAL,
BUT MARK AND I JUST, YOU KNOW, HAD A-A BIG ARGUMENT.
WE'VE BEEN GOING OUT FOR A WHILE,
AND HE DOESN'T LIKE THE FACT
THAT I'M, TECHNICALLY, NOT DIVORCED.
EVEN THOUGH I FEEL DIVORCED,
AND-AND HAVE BEEN SEPARATED FOR SO LONG.
BUT, THE FACT THAT I DON'T HAVE THAT LITTLE PAPER
IS REALLY STARTING TO GET TO HIM.
THIS IS SO BAD-- THERE'S NOTHING.
I CAN'T-- - IT'S JUST--
THERE'S SOMETHING GOING ON WITH THIS AREA.
IS THAT RED? - IT'S RED, YEAH, BECAUSE--
- OH, I THOUGHT THAT WAS MAKE UP.
- I NEED PREPARATION H.
- PREPARATION H IS FOR YOUR ***[deleted].
- JUST BECAUSE IT'S FOR YOUR ***,
DOESN'T MEAN THERE'S *** IN IT.
- I KNOW, BUT IT'S FOR YOUR ***.
- BUT IT DOESN'T-- THERE'S NO *** IN IT.
- SO, WOULD YOU PUT PREPARATION H IN YOUR MOUTH?
- IF I NEEDED TO REDUCE SWELLING, YES.
I'M GETTING READY TO GO TO THIS ANNIVERSARY PARTY,
AT "MYNT," TRYING TO GET MY MIND OFF MY LIFE.
AND, WHO SHOULD WALK IN?
ROBERT, TO RAID THE REFRIGERATOR,
STEAL ALL MY BEER.
- ARE YOU GOING TO, UH, TO THIS THING WITH MARK?
- HUH. - INTERESTING QUESTION.
- THAT IS AN INTERESTING QUESTION.
FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK. - HE DOESN'T WANNA--
- NO, THIS HAS TO DO WITH THE DIVORCE AND STUFF.
I MEAN, I GET IT.
- WHAT?
OKAY, SO THEN, YOU KNOW WHAT-- - YEAH, BUT HE'S, LIKE,
HANGING IT OVER YOUR SHOULDER. - BUT THEN, YOU KNOW WHAT?
THEN, LET'S JUST GET DIVORCED. - IS IT SHOULDER?
- ROBERT, I WILL DO THIS WHEN WE'RE READY.
YOU KNOW, IT'S NOT AN ISSUE. - I'M-I'M READY.
- OKAY, I'M GLAD YOU'RE READY.
[laughing]
- YOU'RE SUCH A LIAR. - TWO YEARS.
- WHY, IS EVERYTHING PEACHY WITH YOU AND--
- MILENA? - YEAH.
- EXTREMELY.
I'M JUST-I'M-I'M [deleted] RAINBOWS.
[laughing]
- NO, YOU'RE NOT-- OH, PLEASE. - YEAH, I AM, REALLY.
YOU KNOW, SHE'S-- - OKAY, GO AHEAD, GO AHEAD.
I'LL JUST-- GO AHEAD, SAY IT.
- WELL, SHE IS 15 YEARS YOUNGER THAN YOU, YOU KNOW?
[laughing]
- OH, GOD, HE JUST WENT THERE.
- THAT'S NOT IT, THOUGH-- THAT'S REALLY NOT IT.
- DID YOU JUST SAY THAT TO ME? - NO, NO, THAT'S NOT IT.
THAT'S NOT IT.
- DOES SHE FART?
- YOU KNOW, I DON'T KNOW.
I DON'T KNOW.
- THAT'S NOT COOL. - DOES SHE HAVE A BUTT?
- YEAH. - D-DOES SHE HAVE AN ***?
- YES. - B-BEBA, STOP.
YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU GUYS-- - DO YOU GUYS DO IT IN THE BUTT?
[laughing]
- OKAY, THAT'S IT-- THAT'S ENOUGH.
GO WORK OUT-- NO, SERIOUSLY, THAT'S ENOUGH.
I-I HAVE ENOUGH OF-- I HAVE MY OWN ISSUES.
- NO, THIS JUST GOT GOOD.
[laughing]
- ARE YOU EXCITED FOR "MYNT?"
CAN YOU BELIEVE TEN YEARS?
I'M SO PROUD OF ROMAIN.
- I'VE NEVER HEARD OF A CLUB LASTING FOR TEN YEARS.
- I'M SO PROUD OF HIM. - AND GOING-GOING THIS STRONG.
- I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I'M GONNA SEE HIM TONIGHT,
'CAUSE HE'S JUST BEEN REALLY STRESSED.
- WHAT-- WHY IS HE SO STRESSED?
- WELL, BECAUSE HE WANTS TO MAKE SURE
EVERYBODY'S TAKEN CARE OF.
YOU KNOW HOW HE IS WITH THE CLIENTS.
THE CLIENTS ARE THE STAR.
I TELL HIM, LIKE, "DON'T BE SO STRESSED-- RELAX."
- HAVE A SHOT! - YES!
- SHE'S LIKE, "THEY'RE CRAZY," BUT THAT'S US-- SORRY.
- OH, YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT-- YOU HAVEN'T DRANK IN YEARS.
THAT'S RIGHT-- I'M SORRY, DAYSY.
I AM SUCH A BAD BOSS. - WHY?
- I FORGOT.
SHE'S BEEN SOBER FOR A FEW YEARS.
SHE'S TRYING TO BE, LIKE--
SHE'S A PRIEST, OR I DON'T KNOW.
SOMETHIN' LIKE THAT.
SO, WE'RE GONNA HAVE AN AMAZING TIME--
TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY.
WE'RE GONNA DRINK OUR LIVES AWAY.
- JUST NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING MY EX.
THAT'S ALL I GOTTA SAY. - OH, GOD, HERE WE GO AGAIN.
ROMAIN WANTS NO DRAMA.
LIKE, IT'S HIS CLUB, IT'S HIS IMAGE.
THAT'S ONE THING WE HAVE TO PROTECT.
- DO I EVER CAUSE DRAMA AT HIS CLUB?
IF ANYTHING, YOU DO. - LAST TIME, YOU WERE CRYING.
- THAT WAS RIGHT AFTER OUR BREAK-UP.
OF COURSE, I'M GONNA CRY.
I MEAN, YOU SEE A PERSON YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IN SO LONG,
THAT YOU WERE A PART OF THEIR LIFE FOR, LIKE, FOUR YEARS,
IT'S KIND OF HARD, DON'T YOU THINK?
- MARTA AND THE DJ AT "MYNT" USED TO DATE,
FOR QUITE SOME TIME.
HE ENDED UP CHEATING ON MARTA,
AND THEN ENDED UP BREAKING UP WITH MARTA
AND CONTINUING THE RELATIONSHIP
WITH THE GIRL HE CHEATED ON HER WITH.
- OH, MY GOD! - YEAH, WHAT'S GOING ON?
- I'M IN THE POSITION WHERE I JUST WANNA SHOOT MYSELF,
YOU KNOW, BECAUSE I'M, LIKE, STUCK IN THE MIDDLE.
LIKE, HE'S LIKE, "OH, IS MARTA WORKING?
"WHAT IS SHE DOING?"
- WHY-WHY IS HE SO C-CURIOUS ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE DOING?
- HE DOESN'T CARE. - BECAUSE HE--
'CAUSE IT'S MY SISTER. - HE DOESN'T CARE.
- SO, SHE'S ALWAYS AROUND. - NO, NO.
HE'S ALWAYS TRYING TO FIND EXCUSES,
BECAUSE HE DOES NOT LIKE ME, FOR NO APPARENT REASON,
WHATSOEVER.
AND, YOU KNOW WHAT?
EVERY SINGLE TIME I'M AROUND HIM,
HE HAS THIS NEGATIVE ATTITUDE THAT JUST PISSES ME OFF,
'CAUSE IT'S LIKE, "WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST ME?"
- I HAVE SO MUCH GOING ON IN MY LIFE, CAREER-WISE,
I CAN'T-I CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS [deleted].
- MAYBE NOT TONIGHT, 'CAUSE IT'S HIS NIGHT.
IT'S HIS TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY. - I KNOW.
- IT'S PROBABLY NOT THE BEST NIGHT TO DO THAT.
- JOANNA, YOU CAN'T DEAL WITH IT
BECAUSE YOU DON'T-YOU DON'T EVER DEFEND ME
WHEN WE'RE AROUND. - ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I ALWAYS DEFEND YOU, MARTA! - HE SAYS MEAN THINGS.
HE ALWAYS-- LAST TIME-- - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
- LAST TIME-- - I ALWAYS DEFEND YOU, MARTA!
- COMING UP...
- I CANNOT HOLD IT IN ANYMORE-- I HATE HIM
- FOR 22 YEARS.
I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE A SURGEON--
IT'S KINDA WEIRD.
EVEN WHEN I WAS A LITTLE KID-- YEAH.
- OH, IT'S SO CUTE. - IT'S REALLY STRANGE.
I WAS A SURGEON WHEN I WAS 23.
- HE WAS A DOOGIE HOWSER.
- I SKIPPED COLLEGE.
- I HOPE THE BRAIN GETS PASSED ON
TO OUR LITTLE ONE-- - HONEY, HONEY--
- BECAUSE I'M SMART, BUT I'M NOT LENNY.
- THAT'S ACTUALLY WHAT I'M HOPING FOR.
IMAGINE IF THEY LOOK LIKE ME, AND HAVE--
- HER BRAIN?
- I WAS JUST MAKING A JOKE.
- SO IN LOVE-- IT'S SO CUTE.
- GO TO YOUR ROOM!
- YOU DON'T EVER DEFEND ME WHEN HE'S AROUND.
- ARE YOU KIDDING?
I ALWAYS DEFEND YOU, MARTA! - HE SAYS MEAN THINGS.
- LAST TIME, HE [deleted] TOLD ME I'M FAT.
- I ALWAYS DEFEND YOU. - OKAY?
NO-- LAST TIME, HE TOLD ME, "YOU'RE FAT.
"OH, YOU LOOK UGLY."
LIKE, HE'LL SAY MEAN THINGS LIKE THAT TO ME,
AND, LIKE, AND HE MEANS IT.
- YOU GUYS NEED TO BE NOT LIVING IN THE SAME HOUSE.
LIKE, NOT-NOT-- - NO, 'CAUSE THE ENERGIES
JUST KEEP CLASHING.
IT DOESN'T WORK OUT. - YEAH.
- HI! - OH, SEXY MAMA!
- HOW ARE YOU? - GOOD, AND YOU?
SORRY I'M LATE. - OH, MY GOODNESS!
IT'S GLITTER GALORE! - LEXI, LOOK AT YOU.
[collective chatter]
- ARE YOU THIRSTY?
ARE YOU THIRSTY? - I AM THIRSTY, I'M HUNGRY.
I'M EVERYTHING.
- I'M GONNA HAVE A RED BULL AND CHAMPAGNE.
- WHAT? - RED BULL AND CHAMPAGNE.
I CALL IT "CHAMBULL."
- HI, GUYS. - HI!
- HI, LENNY! - HELLO.
- HOW ARE YOU? - HOW ARE YOU?
- I'M DOING GREAT-- HOW'S EVERYTHING GOING?
- TERRIFIC. - COME AND JOIN THE GIRLS.
- GOOD.
SO, YOU'RE NOT JOINING US TONIGHT, ARE YOU?
- HOW ARE YOU?
NO, I HAVE TO WORK TOMORROW. - AW.
- I HAVE THE DAY OFF TOMORROW.
- YOU DO? - YES.
- SO YOU'RE IN LUCK.
MY WIFE HAS THE DAY OFF TOMORROW, TOO.
[laughing] - THAT IS SO FUNNY!
[indistinct]
- I TAKE CARE OF MY HUSBAND.
HE'S A JOB IN HISSELF.
- OKAY, WE MET ELSA, ON SATURDAY.
- I'VE NEVER MET HER. - OH, YEAH, SHE FAINTED.
- I FELT SO SORRY WHEN I MET HER, BECAUSE--
- LISTEN, SHE'S A LADY IN HER 70's.
SHE DIDN'T EAT-- - IN HER 70's-- OH, WOW!
- SO, SHE STILL LOOKS GREAT, EVEN THOUGH--
SHE LOOKS GREAT, YOU KNOW?
SHE DIDN'T EAT-- - WHO, ELSA LOOKS GREAT?
- YEAH, FOR HER AGE. - SHE'S IN HER 70's.
- SHE'S IN HER 70's. - I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT.
[sighs] ELSA'S PLASTIC SURGERY-- IT'S NOT GOOD.
THAT'S-THAT'S ALL I CAN REALLY SAY ABOUT THAT.
IT-IT'S NOT GOOD.
- SHE DOESN'T LOOK GREAT-- SHE LOOKS SCARY, IN A WAY.
BUT, I-- LIKE, MY HEART GOES OUT TO HER,
BUT I JUST WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.
- SHE LOOKS SCARY IN A GOOD WAY?
IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO SAY?
- NO, BUT WHAT IS IT, SILICONE?
- I DON'T KNOW-- WHATEVER IT IS,
IT WAS A BAD DOCTOR.
BECAUSE, I MEAN, A DOCTOR THAT DOES THAT, IS NOT GOOD.
THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY. - IT BREAKS MY--
WHEN I MET HER, I JUST WANTED TO, LIKE,
GIVE HER A HUG OR SOMETHING-- - HUG HER-- YEAH, HUG HER.
- BECAUSE IT BREAKS MY HEART TO SEE HER LIKE THAT.
- I FEEL LIKE THE GIRLS JUST SAY
WHATEVER COMES TO THEIR MIND,
WITHOUT GIVING IT A SECOND THOUGHT,
AND I WAS LIKE, "GIRL, TAKE IT EASY."
BUT, STILL, YOU WERE SURPRISED THAT SHE WAS 70.
- YEAH.
- MAYBE SHE'S A LITTLE OVERDONE,
BUT I DON'T BLAME IT ON ELSA.
I BLAME IT ON THE PLASTIC SURGEON THAT DID THAT TO HER.
- LISA, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS.
- YES, THANK YOU. - YOU'RE WELCOME.
- LENNY, HOW MANY *** DID THIS COST?
[indistinct] - AH, GOOD ONE!
- THIS HOUSE-THIS HOUSE IS BUILT BY ***!
BILLIONS OF ***!
[collective laughter]
- HI, BABY. - HELLO.
- MIAMI'S A REALLY TOUGH TOWN FOR CLUBS.
USUALLY, THE CLUBS LAST A YEAR OR TWO,
BUT "MYNT'S" BEEN AROUND FOR TEN YEARS.
IT'S HUGE.
HUGE, HUGE, HUGE.
- HEY.
YEAH, WHATEVER. - IT'S OKAY.
- LIKE, DON'T PRETEND YOU LOVE EACH OTHER, OKAY?
- HOW ARE YOU-- NICE DRESS.
- "MYNT" IS A FABULOUS CLUB IN MIAMI BEACH.
IT'S BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE,
WHICH IS WHAT MIAMI BEACH IS ALL ABOUT.
- THANK YOU, THANK YOU. - CONGRATS!
CONGRATS, CONGRATS!
YAY-- SO HAPPY FOR YOU!
[collective chatter]
- OH, MY GOD-- CRISTAL!
[collective cheering]
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN, THEY DON'T WANNA BE MY SECURITY?
- WHY?
- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THAT WAS, LIKE, TWO YEARS AGO. - WHO'D YOU THROW ICE AT?
- THAT WAS, LIKE, TWO YEARS AGO.
- AT WHO?
- EVERYBODY. - GIRLS OR GUYS?
- I'M SURE GIRLS APPRECIATED IT.
BABY, THAT WAS, LIKE, TWO YEARS AGO.
WHAT THE [deleted]?
- THEY'RE STILL TRAUMATIZED. - HE'S A TROUBLE MAKER.
- HE'S-HE'S A [deleted] IDIOT.
- YOU'RE MY FAVORITE, EVER.
[collective] - AH!
- OH, HI!
- GOOD LUCK. - THANK YOU FOR THE TWEET.
[indistinct] - OH, YOU'RE WELCOME.
- LET ME LOOK AT YOU-- YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL!
- I LOVE THAT DRESS! - THANK YOU!
- ALL RIGHT, WHERE-DO YOU KNOW WHERE TO GO?
OF COURSE YOU DO.
IF YOU HAVEN'T WORKED THIS CROWD--
I DON'T KNOW-- DO WE GO HERE?
WHERE DO WE GO?
I'LL JUST FOLLOW YOU-- YOU SEEM TO KNOW WHERE TO GO.
- I'VE NEVER REALLY BEEN A PERSON
THAT LOVED THE NIGHTCLUB SCENE.
I DON'T GO THAT OFTEN,
BUT IT'S JUST AN OPPORTUNITY TO NOT THINK ABOUT MUCH,
BECAUSE YOU CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING,
YOU CAN'T SEE ANYBODY,
AND THE CIGARETTE SMOKE'S OVERWHELMING.
SO, YOU JUST KINDA HAVE TO BE IN THE MOMENT.
- ROCK AND ROLL!
[collective] - AH!
- LEA HAS ARRIVED-- THE PARTY HAS STARTED!
- SHOOT ME IF I AM AT A CLUB, AT THE AGE OF 40.
[indistinct chatter]
- WHOA!
- YOU LOOK SO PRETTY.
IT'S LIKE NEW YEARS EVE-- WE HAVE SO MUCH SPARKLE ON.
BUT TEN YEARS IS TEN YEARS!
- MARYSOL, SO YOU MISSED LEA'S MEETING AT THE COMMITTEE.
ARE YOU NOT DOING HER EVENT THIS YEAR?
- I TOLD HER LAST YEAR, WE WEREN'T GONNA DO IT ANYMORE,
'CAUSE THEY'RE VERY UNORGANIZED.
- REALLY?
- FOR HER TO SAY THAT SHE CHOSE NOT TO DO THE EVENT
IS A BLATANT LIE.
- BECAUSE ELAINE, THE DRAG QUEEN,
WAS SAYING THAT YOU WOULDN'T LET HER ON THE RED CARPET.
- NO-- NO-NO-NO-NO.
THOSE KIND OF FABRICATED STORIES,
T-TO DAMAGE MY REPUTATION,
ARE EXTREMELY UPSETTING TO ME,
AND I-I WISH THAT HE WOULD JUST TALK TO ME,
SO WE COULD TALK IT OUT.
- SO, IT'S SOMETHING ELSE?
- THERE WAS ANOTHER EVENT THAT I DID WITH ANOTHER CLIENT,
AND-AND THEY WOULDN'T ALLOW HER TO WALK,
AND I THINK SHE'S PROBABLY CONFUSED THE TWO.
I SWEAR TO GOD. - REALLY?
- SWEAR TO GOD.
- ELAINE!
ELAINE!
COME HERE, COME HERE.
I'M THE TYPE OF PERSON WHERE, I HAVE TOO MUCH TO DRINK,
AND SOMETHING SPARKS MY INTEREST,
I WILL DEFINITELY STIR THE POT.
- I'VE BEEN HEARING FROM ALL MY FRIENDS
THAT YOU'VE BEEN SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT ME.
- WHO TOLD YOU I SAID ANYTHING BAD ABOUT YOU?
WE HAVE ALL THE SAME FRIENDS.
- THAT'S RIGHT-- THAT'S WHY I WAS CONCERNED.
I WAS TOLD THAT YOU WERE THE ONE
WHO SAID YOU DIDN'T WANT ME THERE IN DRAG--
- IT WASN'T ME. - BECAUSE I WAS GOING TO
TRY AND STEAL ALL THE OXYGEN OUT OF THE ROOM.
- ELAINE, EVERYONE KNOWS YOU'RE LEA'S BEST FRIEND.
- ASIDE FROM LEA'S BEST FRIEND, I STAND ALONE.
I DON'T THINK THAT I'M ANY BETTER THAN ANYBODY ELSE,
BUT I SHOULD BE GIVEN DUE RESPECT--
- IT'S NOT ABOUT WHETHER YOU'RE BETTER OR NOT,
BUT WHEN A CLIENT PAYS ME TO DO A JOB--
- YEAH.
- AND THEY WANT THIS AND THEY DON'T WANT THAT,
I HAVE TO DO WHAT THEY TELL ME TO DO, BECAUSE THEY PAY ME.
AND AT LEA'S GALA,
YOU WERE NEVER DENIED RED CARPET.
- IF I HAVE TO DEFEND MYSELF,
IT MAY BE AT THE EXPENSE OF EXPOSING WHAT REALLY HAPPENED.
- IF YOU STEPPED IN BULL[deleted],
THEN YOU NEED TO OWN UP TO IT,
'CAUSE I SMELLED IT FROM THE VERY BEGINNING.
- WELL, LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.
I DON'T OWN THE TOP PR FIRM IN THE COUNTRY,
'CAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING.
THEY KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING. - YEAH.
I KNEW WHAT THEY WERE DOING AS WELL.
THEY WERE TRYING TO-TO-TO RUFFLE MY FEATHERS,
AND SAY-- - WHY WOULD THEY CARE?
- BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT SMALL-MINDED PEOPLE DO!
- IT'S A 25 YEAR OLD GIRL-- - SMALL-MINDED PEOPLE DO THAT.
THEY TRY TO HAVE A MOMENT OF CONTROL.
- AT THE END OF THE DAY, THERE'S NOTHING PERSONAL.
- UPSTAIRS SOMEWHERE, DANCING. - RIGHT HERE.
[laughing]
- SO, I'M HAVING A GREAT TIME DANCING WITH THE GIRLS.
SUDDENLY, I LOOK OVER AT THE DJ BOOTH,
AND THEN I SEE MARTA'S EX-BOYFRIEND,
THAT, BASICALLY, BROKE MY SISTER'S HEART.
SUDDENLY, THIS ANGER STARTED FILLING MY BODY.
YOU DON'T DO THAT TO MY SISTER.
YOU JUST DON'T.
- I'VE HEARD YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN ENGAGED
FOR FIVE YEARS. - FIVE YEARS.
- I'M TRYING TO CONVINCE HIM TO JUST GET MARRIED,
AND DO IT ALREADY. - WE WILL.
- WAIT A MINUTE-- YOU HAVEN'T TRIED A BRUNETTE BEFORE.
- YOU CAN'T HAVE ONLY VANILLA TASTE.
A LITTLE CHOCOLATE, SOMETIMES,
IS OKAY. - AH.
- SHE WAS JUST FLIRTING WITH HIM IN FRONT OF EVERYONE.
I WAS LIKE, "ARE YOU SERIOUS?
"ARE YOU REALLY DOING THIS HERE?"
- BLONDES DO IT BETTER.
- NO, THEY DON'T. - THEY WAKE UP BEAUTIFUL.
- AND SO DO I, BABY.
[chuckling]
- BABY.
- HE'S [deleted] DISGUSTING!
- WHAT HAPPENED? - NO, NO!
- COMING UP, ON "THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF MIAMI"...
- I CANNOT HOLD IT IN ANYMORE-- I HATE HIM!
HE SHOULDN'T BE HERE!
HE SHOULD NOT BE HERE.
[indistinct shouting]
I [deleted] CANNOT STAND HIM!
- BABY, WHY-- NO, DON'T DO THIS.
- WHAT HAPPENED?
- BABY, LISTEN,
I TOLD YOU NOT TO GET INVOLVED WITH MY BUSINESS.
- NO, NO, NO, NO!
I CAN'T-I CANNOT HOLD IT IN ANYMORE.
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM.
I HATE HIM, ROMAIN-- I HATE HIM.
- I'M GONNA GO HOME. - FOR WHAT HE DID TO MY SISTER,
I [deleted] HATE HIM.
- I JUST FELT SO BAD FOR ROMAIN.
THIS WAS A BIG NIGHT FOR HIM,
AND SHE'S JUST BERATING HIM ABOUT SOMETHING OR OTHER.
I COULDN'T EVEN MAKE OUT WHAT IT WAS.
YOU KNOW, SOMETHING ABOUT A DJ
THAT USED TO GO OUT WITH MARTA.
- STOP-- ENOUGH NOW. - HE SHOULD NOT BE HERE.
- IT'S EMBARRASSING. - HE'S A SCUMBAG.
- DON'T GET INTO IT.
- THIS IS HIS BIG NIGHT.
LET'S TRY TO MAKE HIM FEEL HAPPY AND BETTER,
'CAUSE I FEEL BAD FOR HIM.
- IF I WAS HURT...
- IT'S MY SISTER.
NOBODY MESSES WITH MY SISTER.
- LET'S GO SIT WITH MARTA.
- IT'S OKAY-- DON'T WORRY.
IT'S GONNA BE OKAY, OKAY?
- I COULD HAVE SWORN THAT JOANNA TOLD MARTA
TO NOT START ANY DRAMA AT "MYNT."
BUT JOANNA STARTED DRAMA AT "MYNT."
- JOANNA, WHAT THE [deleted]?
JOANNA, WHAT THE [deleted]?
SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE [deleted] IS WRONG WITH YOU?
- MARTA-- - YOU ARE AN IDIOT!
- SHE'S JUST TOO MUCH IN JOANNA'S WORLD,
AND I UNDERSTAND THEY'RE SISTERS,
BUT THEY NEED A TIME OUT.
- WHY THE [deleted] WOULD YOU DO THAT?
WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? - I HATE HIM, MARTA!
I HATE HIM!
- I WISH SHE'D DIAL IT BACK A LITTLE,
BECAUSE I THINK IT IS NOT SO BECOMING TO HER.
- I'M OVER HIM. - I HATE HIM, MARTA!
- WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?
WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?
- IF I WERE ROMAIN, I'D BE RECONSIDERING THOSE BLONDES.
THEY MIGHT WAKE UP PRETTY IN THE MORNING,
BUT THEY SURE LOOK UGLY AT NIGHT.
- LISTEN, LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.
THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TEN YEARS ANNIVERSARY
OF "MYNT," AND HERE, WE'RE ARGUING.
- YES, AND I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.
- OKAY, GOOD. - BUT--
- SO LET ME RUN MY BUSINESS. - HOLD ON.
- HEY, DON'T POINT YOUR FINGER AT ME.
DON'T POINT YOUR FINGER AT ME.
- HOLD ON, HOLD ON.
MARTA'S MY SISTER. - OKAY.
- MARTA'S MY SISTER.
SHE'S-- YOU HATE HER. - I WALK AWAY-- YOU BE CAREFUL.
YOU BE CAREFUL. - YOU HATE HER.
WHATEVER-- [deleted] HIM.
WOW!
WOW!
- NEXT, ON "THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF MIAMI"...
I'M KIND OF FED UP WITH IT.
- THE NEXT PHOTO, MAYBE TOPLESS?
- WE HAVE ONLY THREE DAYS FOR YOU TO GET IT.
- WHY DID I SAY YES TO THIS [deleted]?
OH, MY GOSH-- LOOK AT THE DANCERS!
- YOU GOT IT GIRL-- SHOW IT!
- SHE'S BEATING ME TO THE TWEET
AND I CAN'T [deleted] BELIEVE IT.
- YOU DON'T BEAT ADRIANA TO A TWEET.
- OBVIOUSLY.
- LEA, I HAD A BOND WITH, AND NOW IT'S BROKEN.
- I DON'T FEEL LIKE THEY NECESSARILY
CONSIDER YOU THEIR FRIEND.
- I DON'T WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH HER BOYFRIEND.
I CAN BARELY MANAGE THE SITUATION WITH MINE.
- I NEVER TALK ABOUT RODOLFO BECAUSE I HATE HIM.
I DON'T LIKE TO SEE YOU LIKE THIS.
- I KNOW.
- SHE SAID THAT YOU WERE MAKING OUT
WITH ONE OF THE DANCERS.
- FOR MORE ON "THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF MIAMI,"
GO TO bravotv.com.