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Previously:
I wrote some letters.
So I just thought maybe
if I don't come home
one night,
they have something that tells
them how I, you know
I wrote one to Sheila
because she's kind of
pissed at me now.
And Needles, and, uh,
you know, each one of the guys.
But nobody reads anything,
you know.
"Dear Lou, you have been
more of a brother to me
than even my own
blood brother.
"
Okay, you wanna be
a real father to this baby
and not some *** donor
named Dad?
Then you will get off that rig
and into somewhere safe.
The greatest wedding gift
that you guys could give us,
would be if you guys
renewed your wedding vows.
I also make
a solemn promise to
"Retire from active duty,
"take a desk job downtown,
a training job or any other job
that will keep me out of harm's
way for the sake of my family.
"
We got ourselves
a real problem.
Oh, ***!
Lou, what's your position?
We're on three.
We're in
the middle of an arson, chief.
There's diesel fuel everywhere.
Holy ***!
We hear the kids now.
We're heading
in their direction.
You can't send them
to the bulkhead.
It's like a furnace up there.
We don't have a choice,
Sid.
They're not gonna
leave those kids.
*** door won't shut.
We're sitting
on a powder keg here.
Urgent! Urgent!
The bulkhead is bricked over.
Sixty-two has no means
of egress.
- The structure is compromised.
- It is unstable.
Get off the *** roof now.
Go, Tom! Go!
Sure?
We'll be fine.
Trust me.
Hand salute.
About face!
Today, we are gathered
together to honor five men.
My men.
My brothers.
Five men
who were given a choice.
To run.
To flee for safe ground.
To seek clean, fresh air.
Or to move deeper.
Knowing the danger.
Knowing that two young people,
innocent kids,
were crying out for help.
For my men to save them.
We all know
which choice they made.
These men,
these five
extraordinary human beings
will forever live in my heart
and in the memory
of all who knew them
and in the public records
of this great city as heroes.
The bravest of the brave.
I shed no tears.
I cry out not in agony.
I beseech the sky not in anger,
but with pride
in a voice
that is strong and clear.
I am a better man,
and we are all better people
for having known them.
Good night,
my dear friends,
my five unforgettable brothers.
I shall see you
on the other side.
* On another day
C'mon, c'mon *
* With these ropes tied tight
Can we do no wrong? *
* Now we grieve
'Cause now it's gone *
* Things were good
When we were young *
* When my teeth bite down
I can see the blood *
* Of a thousand men
Who have come and gone *
* Now we grieve
'Cause now it's gone *
* Things were good
When we were young *
* Is it safe to stay? *
* C'mon, c'mon *
* Was it right to leave? *
* C'mon, c'mon *
* Will I ever learn? *
* C'mon, c'mon *
* C'mon, c'mon
C'mon, c'mon *
Hey.
Hey.
I know you're burnt,
Tom.
We all are.
But, uh
Couple things I'm gonna have to
say, all right?
Yeah.
As, uh, acting lieutenant,
which is the role you assumed
as senior man after Lou.
Mm-hm.
Look, there's gonna be
a few things you have to do
that you may not wanna do,
all right?
One is this locker situation.
The personal items.
I know.
I know.
I got it on my list.
Yeah.
It's just before we get
some new guy shipped here,
we should address that,
because we need the space.
Got it.
Okay.
Second, and this is more
important, is the CD15.
The blow-by-blow.
Headquarters
is already barking at me.
It's standard procedure.
And I hate to do it to you,
Tommy,
but you're the only one that
can tell them what happened.
They want it inch by inch,
second by second.
Just the facts.
But I'll tell you one thing.
The fact that you rode
that staircase down
and you made it
out of there alive,
that's a miracle, my friend.
Yeah.
Doesn't feel like
a miracle right now.
You, uh You all right?
I don't know.
Listen,
I'm gonna get started
on the CD15.
You smell that?
Smells like diesel fuel.
Yeah.
It sure does.
Hey, what's going on
up here?
- We're on three.
- We're in the middle of an arson, chief.
- Yo, fellas.
- We got ourselves a real problem.
- Shawn, save your air.
- Save your air, Frankie.
Whoa!
Nielsy!
Need a ride?
- Hey, shut up.
- All right, hush.
Help us!
- *** it.
- You hear that?
Yeah.
It's those kids.
All right, let's go.
Yeah.
Like we're not
gonna come with you.
Deep breath.
Deep breath.
Yeah.
Deep breath.
Okay.
We're sitting on a powder
keg down here.
Go, guys.
Go.
Let's go.
Keep Going.
Straight up.
Go, go, go.
Keep going.
Sixty-two has no
means of egress.
Nielsy, I want you
to get off that roof now.
The structure is compromised.
It is unstable.
Get off the *** roof now.
What do you wanna do, Lou?
Go, Tom.
Go.
Sure?
We'll be fine.
Trust me.
- Tommy!
- Hey.
You all right?
Yeah.
Franco.
Yeah.
You all right?
Hey!
Mike?
- Lou?
- We got you.
- Don't let me go.
- Ahh.
Don't let me go.
- Mikey move that!
- It's gonna hurt.
All right.
Here we go.
Here he comes, Frankie.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
- Grab me.
- Hang on.
- Lou?
- Easy, guys.
Lou?
It's my leg.
Ahh, it's my leg.
- Hey, I got Lou, guys!
- Tom!
I think it's broken.
Yeah, my right leg.
I got you, brother.
I got you, bro.
Come on, man.
Oh, you fell down.
Come on.
Jesus Christ,
you gotta lose some weight.
Frank.
You all right?
Don't come over, guys.
Back off!
You all right?
Stay away!
I was talking
to Jessica today.
She told me that her parents
let her and her sister Tiffany
go out by themselves.
- So
- Where to?
Out in the city.
Oh, that is not happening.
Hello.
Hi.
Baby likes Twizzlers.
What are you smiling about?
Nothing.
I can't just stand here
and smile at my, uh, family?
No.
It's not you.
Ha ha.
Okay.
Just for your information.
I have a major
announcement to make.
What?
I just put in
my retirement papers.
Tom, are you?
Baby!
Oh, sweetie, thank you!
Thank you!
You're welcome.
This is for real?
I think so.
Yeah.
Oh, I think
Wyatt's so surprised
that you're retiring
that he actually
pooped his pants.
Great.
I'll do it, Mom.
No, no, no.
Let this be the beginning
of my stay-at-home.
Mr.
Mom excursion.
Great!
Hold on,
let me get my camera.
All right, big guy.
Daddy, that's right.
Tommy, I cannot believe this.
So you just told them today?
Please.
Photo one.
Here we go,
pal.
Hey, hey, hey.
If it isn't the ghosts of
Christmas stupid together again.
How's the arm?
Uh, sucks.
Three or four months
of physical therapy.
Should be all right.
Did you get assigned yet?
No.
Any day now.
Where will they put you?
Man, I don't give a ***
as long as it's not here,
you know?
You heard about Tommy?
Yeah.
I heard.
Hey, look who it is.
Whoa, now.
Don't worry.
I got it.
Uhh.
Ohh, ***.
Yo, man, I don't see
how crippled people do it.
But I can tell you I'm gonna be
a hell of a lot nicer to gimps
from now on.
For sure.
Yeah.
How much longer you stuck
in that cast, B?
Seven more *** weeks.
I'm going crazy man.
I'm thinking I gotta find
a nice little Korean lady
with little small fingers
to get down here
and get that itch, you know.
Or a baby.
Say what?
Babies have small fingers.
Ooh, Korean babies.
Even smaller fingers.
Okay.
Enough! Seriously.
Till then, zip it.
Look, I don't even know
if I'm staying.
What?
Thinking about putting in
for a transfer.
Something about this house.
It's haunted.
It doesn't feel the same.
Of course, it doesn't.
We had something
going here, guys.
Seriously, something different,
something special.
Yeah, well
I'm actually thinking
about quitting.
Quitting, really?
You mean, like, you're out?
Yeah, man.
Colleen, she just
ain't thrilled
about me being
in F.
D.
N.
Y.
I mean, it was much better
when Tommy was here
because she felt like
we had an eye on each other.
But now, man, that he's gone,
which is another problem
because after every huge fire
he's gonna be hounding me
for details.
Telling you the ***
you did wrong,
how he could've
handled it better.
If you guys
are all leaving,
then I'm leaving, too,
you know,
but this time I'll find a house
where they appreciate me.
You know? They don't treat me
like an idiot.
A house where
they appreciate me.
Just wanna find a house.
What can I say, boys?
Fun while it lasted, right?
Yeah.
All good things,
huh?
Yeah.
Why are you acting
like this is final?
I mean we're gonna
see each other again, right?
Lou's funeral,
when we spread his ashes.
Yeah, Sean-o,
good times.
Hey, you know what guys?
I mean, this is what
I'm gonna miss.
Right here.
I mean, us busting each other's
balls around this table.
These were some of
the best times, guys.
Yeah.
That's true.
Anything that involves balls
is a good time for you, right?
Balls and wedding dresses.
Hey guys, come on now.
This is the last time
we're gonna inhabit
the inner sanctum together.
Let's lay off of Mikey
for once, okay?
Thanks, Frank.
Yeah, no problem, man.
You can blow me later.
Hey!
Come on, you just said
you liked it.
Make up your mind.
Let's go.
- Hey!
- Hey.
How'd it go?
It was good.
Saw, uh, some geese
on the pond.
Went around the park
a couple times.
And I think
he got some color.
That's good.
Yeah.
Uh, I'm not gonna bring him
to the funeral.
I mean, the official
F.
D.
N.
Y.
thing.
Just think
it'd be too much.
There's too many people.
Too many suits.
You know?
Just bring him to
the ashes thing.
It's better.
Yeah.
That's what
I'm thinking about.
How's the eulogy coming?
Ha! I was a little
freaked out about it.
And then I had this dream
where it kind of came to me.
It was almost like, uh,
I don't know,
like Lou was behind it
or something.
Maybe he was.
Um, want some water
or something?
I'd love some.
So
You haven't been doing
too much talking
I mean, at least
in front of me.
about Lou.
And I I know you
don't wanna unload on Janet
or any of the other guys.
So I just wanted to
tell you that, you know,
I'm here if you wanna
vent or cry or
Okay.
I, uh
I put my papers in.
Oh!
Oh, wow.
Well, that's fantastic.
Uh, so you You think that
you're cut out for it, then,
to be a lieutenant?
No, not those papers.
Oh.
Yeah, right.
I was going
to suggest a transfer.
Actually I think you've gotta
get out of that house.
You gotta have fresh start.
I think that actually is
a really good plan.
I'm retiring.
What's so funny?
What?
Hold please.
Oh.
You are going to need this.
And this.
Not funny.
And I think maybe this.
What, are you nuts?
Are you nuts? How long
do you think it'll be
before you're gnawing off
your fingers,
sitting around
that apartment?
Jesus Christ.
This is how you react
to Lou biting it?
Okay.
Okay.
You know what
What? He bit it.
He bit it like Jimmy bit it
and Damian bit it and
The only difference is, Jimmy
and Lou took a bigger bite.
What?
I have had you in my hands.
I have had you deep inside me.
I have felt every urge.
Ahh.
Every pulse.
Hey! Ow.
Every wish.
Anytime they occurred.
I know who you are,
and I know what you are.
You need two things to survive.
Sex
and fire.
One's no good without the other.
Where you going?
I am going to the playground
with my kids.
Because I am Super Dad.
Oh, yeah.
Don't forget your medicine.
Bye!
Bye!
So what do we do?
We watch Wyatt
play in the sandbox.
And that's it?
Yeah.
And we tell him
not to eat the sand.
Oh.
That should be pretty easy.
Listen, big guy, hey.
Big guy.
No eating the sand.
Let's wait until he does it,
okay?
Oh, okay.
Dad, you need to relax.
I'm relaxed.
He'll play in the sandbox.
And then he'll play
with his toy and his shovel.
And then maybe
he'll go on the swings
for a little bit.
It's easy.
We just have to watch him.
I don't know
about the swings.
Look at them.
Those look pretty dangerous.
Dad.
Honey, he could fall
off there
and split his head open.
Dad, please,
go sit down and watch.
I'll do this.
Okay?
Sure?
I'm sure.
Go sit down.
All right.
I don't like the look
of them swings.
Hi.
Hi.
I'm Jeff.
Hey.
Tommy.
You, uh, new here?
Uh, yeah.
Good.
It's good to have a new guy.
It's good to have another guy.
Yeah.
Most Mostly women here.
It's all women actually.
Nannies, moms.
Be good to get some more guys.
Get the *** count up.
Don't say ***.
There's kids.
Right.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Katy, I don't want him!
Shh.
Tommy, don't yell.
It upsets the children.
Sorry.
Just, my son
Just Shh.
It's okay.
How about them Yankees?
Did you see the game last night?
No.
My wife's book club
was over.
There's no TV
on book-club nights.
You don't have a backup, uh,
TV in the bedroom?
There's no on book-club nights.
You could always sneak out
to a bar.
Sneak out? That's funny.
Hey, what's going on
over there?
Use the blue shovel.
When Madison's done, it's Tiffany's turn.
Oh, Marsha's just enforcing
the sharing rule.
Enforcing?
Everybody has to learn
how to share.
That's my son's shovel and pail.
We brought those.
No.
That's
everyone's shovel and pail.
Well, everyone's gonna have to
chip in about 18 bucks,
because that's how much
they cost.
Excuse me.
Brittany, it's Madison's turn
to use the blue shovel.
When Madison's done,
then it's Tiffany's turn.
When Tiffany's done,
then it's your turn
to use the blue shovel.
Excuse me.
Hi.
Hi.
That's my son's, uh,
shovel and pail.
Oh, where's your son?
He's on the swings right now.
Well, he can't use the shovel
on a swing, now, can he, heh?
Well, no.
But he may be done
swinging soon.
Then he's gonna
wanna do some shoveling.
It doesn't work that way here.
It doesn't work that way here,
Tommy.
This is a sharing playground.
And each of the kids gets
equal time with each of the toys
that's brought here.
Madison gets the blue shovel,
then Tiffany, then Brittany.
What's Wyatt gonna do
when he
Your son's name is Wyatt?
Yes.
Interesting name.
Wyatt gets to play with
the blue shovel
at home all the time.
Tiffany brought a tea cup.
Madison brought a horsey.
And Brittany brought
a princess purse.
Wyatt's welcome to play
with any of those toys.
Ah, well, Wyatt's a boy.
He doesn't like girl toys.
We don't discriminate
based on gender here.
Maybe Wyatt needs to
get a little more in touch
with his feminine side.
Wyatt doesn't have
a feminine side.
Can I just say something
else, by the way?
Tiffany is the name of a store.
And Madison is the name
of an avenue.
Okay?
And Brittany
is the name of a ***.
Hey! Watch your language.
He said "***" before.
What's wrong with you?
I was wondering
about my son's shovel.
What's going on?
He doesn't wanna
follow the sharing rule.
He's new.
Give him
the benefit of the doubt.
Thank you.
He called your daughter a ***.
What?
"***.
" I said "***.
"
But let me explain.
Do you have a child here, or are
you just some kind of a perv?
I have a kid here.
What's with your face?
Yeah.
What's with your face?
What happened to it?
I was gonna ask the same thing.
I was in a fight
at a playground.
How does that sound?
I'm calling the police.
I'm already dialing.
You kidding?
Maybe you should leave.
I'm not leaving.
This is a public park.
You people don't own this.
Hi.
This is Jeff Martson.
I'm at Bryce Park.
There is a man here
saying the word "***"
in front of the children.
I said that before
and it wasn't It was
Hey, ***! How's that?
Yeah, I did say it.
Did you hear that?
Here's another word.
Ready?
***! How's that?
Katy, let's go.
We're leaving.
Let's go.
This is unbelievable.
And I'm taking
that blue shovel.
Madison is using the shovel.
When she's done, you can.
Oh, really? Guess what?
***!
I'm getting that shovel.
You kidding me?
Hey.
Hey.
Yeah? Well, good luck with
those kids once you Yeah.
Whatever.
Well.
I guess we can never
go back there again.
Who would wanna go back
there? That's ridiculous.
Sandbox rules?
A sandbox is just sand and kids
and toys.
There's no rules.
Look, Dad, there's
an established social structure
in that playground.
You can't just walk in there
and impose your own world view
and value system
on that structure.
Are you secretly going
to *** school?
What are you talking about?
You know what I'm saying.
You wanna talk
about imposing?
Let me tell you something.
Those people That's not, you
know This is America.
Okay?
When I buy the blue shovel,
okay,
I have the freedom of choice
about who I share
the blue shovel with.
Okay?
And if you want the blue shovel,
you're gonna have to
pry the blue shovel
What?
Oh, my God.
What?
I don't think
this is gonna work.
What's not gonna work?
You in the real world.
This is the real world.
That's what I'm saying!
The blue
This is the real world.
The blue shovel,
and I got
I think they're coming.
Where'd you go?
You know,
this is it, guys.
All those years,
all those calls.
This is the last time we're
gonna be on the road together,
the core crew.
Yeah, including Lou.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Including Lou.
Whatever's left of him
in that box back there.
I mean, hey, I don't mean to
get sentimental or anything,
but this is a moment
you gotta acknowledge.
It's like the end of an era.
Something.
People passing
by, they look in this truck.
They just see five schmucks.
But all the *** we've seen,
stuff we've done.
They have no idea.
It's profound.
What's, uh
What's with the gum?
That's your response
to what I just had to say?
I, uh, actually didn't hear
what you said
because of all the snapping
and the popping and the grinding
of your jaws, like you're some
kind of killing machine.
Okay.
I mean, it's so loud, it's like
I'm getting it in stereo.
That's because
I'm not the only one
chewing gum okay, genius?
Black Shawn's got some too!
Oh, great.
Throw me
under the *** gum bus.
Guess what?
This ain't a gum bus.
So both of you spit it out.
Why don't you
go ahead and tell us,
what's the problem?
Here's my problem.
You're always
chewing on something.
A mint or a toothpick
or gum or a cigarette.
I never see you chewing food.
It's always toothpicks.
Toothpicks were invented
so you could pick residual food
out of your teeth
when you were done eating.
You're not supposed to eat
the actual toothpicks.
Is there a point
anywhere in here?
Yeah.
Everybody stop chewing
your gum out loud,
chew it quietly, shut up,
and think about Lou!
Fine by me.
Christ.
I wanna look inside the box,
guys.
What's wrong with you!
I do too.
I'm just saying I'm interested.
Yeah, after all these years
as a firefighter,
what else would you wanna do
but stare into a box
of ashes and bone fragments?
That makes a lot of sense.
It does, Frank.
I'm gonna die someday.
And
Could you give us
a particular time on that event?
I'm thinking
of getting cremated.
But the only thing
that bothers me
is I don't really know
what that is.
So, I'm thinking maybe
if I just take a little peek,
I could get some comfort,
you know?
You're not opening the box.
Why not?
Because I just said.
It's my best friend in there
and your superior officer, okay?
I don't want you
poking around in the ashes
like it's some kind of
Zen garden
with a little rake or something.
All right, enough with the gum!
Spit it out!
Fine!
Fine!
[ALL YELLING INDISTINCTLY
Oh, my God.
God.
Oh, my God.
It's like Lou-Maggedon.
Guys, come over by the box.
Get it into the box.
God, this is disgusting.
I'm covered in Lou.
I got Lou up my nose.
I definitely swallowed
some Lou.
That's nothing.
I got half a pound of Lou
down my *** crack.
I thought I *** myself
when that thing blew.
Now I'm pretty sure it's Lou.
Either that
or a Lou-*** combination.
You had to open the box.
Ah, it's not just my fault.
I mean, these guys opened their
windows and created a vortex.
Okay.
We'll ignore the fact
that you used "vortex"
correctly in a sentence.
But I just wanna point out
that we have about 40 people
waiting on a cliff someplace
to spread Lou's ashes,
which we no longer have
enough of.
Yeah, like this isn't even
Lou's leg.
I say we burn up Mike
and put his ashes in a box.
First of all,
we don't have time.
Second of all,
we don't have an accelerant.
Otherwise
he'd already be on fire.
Maybe we could get some dirt
and mix it up in there.
What did I just say? I said
we have to spread his ashes.
We have to spread them out
lightly on the breeze
so that they disappear,
not land in a *** clump
two feet away.
Oh, I got a better idea.
Why don't we mix in
some hay and grass and ***?
And tell people what?
That he believed
in reincarnation,
and he came back
as a *** bird's nest?
Listen up, guys.
We passed a store
a few miles back.
I'm sure we can find
something there.
Oh, yeah, maybe
they sell Lou Helper.
You got a better suggestion?
You know what?
It's not a bad idea.
We're gonna go back
to the store.
We're gonna find something
light and fluffy
that we can mix in.
In the meantime,
we're gonna need
all the Lou we can get.
Including that ***-crack ash.
Break it out right now.
Right.
Like I'm just gonna
drop trou right here
on the side of the road?
You know, there's a lot of ways
I wanted to remember Lou.
This is not one of them.
Oh, sh-sh-***!
Guys, hey, guys.
Tell this guy I'm not taking
a ***.
Guys, Hey! Hi.
Sir
I'm not pooping.
Step away from the box,
please.
"And the old earth must die.
"So let the warm winds range
"and the blue wave
beat the shore.
"For eve and morn, ye will
never see through eternity.
"All things were born.
Ye will come never more,
for all things must die.
"
Before we release Lou's remains
to the wind and the sea,
let's take this final moment
to share any thoughts
we might have had about him
or what he meant to us.
Anybody?
He was kind.
That's what I'm gonna remember.
Lou, he always treated me
with respect.
He never treated me like
I was his best friend's
messed-up sister.
I wasn't someone he had to
endure, you know?
He always treated me
like I was a lady.
I'm gonna miss that.
He was a great lieutenant.
Truly.
I'm gonna be wearing
a blue shirt pretty soon,
but I'll never be half
the leader that Lou was.
He taught me a lot.
I'm gonna miss him.
He had a big heart.
He loved life.
And cake.
He was a hell of a firefighter.
God knows he loved to eat.
He had an encyclopedic
memory of ***.
Well, you couldn't
stump the guy.
Lithuanian midget ***?
He'd rattle off
half a dozen titles
without batting an eye.
Uncanny.
Well, he took
my "big heart" line.
Yeah.
This was my fault.
Anybody else?
Tom?
Well, I
Don't really have a lot to say.
But, fortunately,
Lou does.
He left this letter, uh,
in my locker
with specific instructions
on the front for it
not to be opened
until after he died.
And unlike some people we know,
I actually obeyed
the instructions.
So, here goes.
"Dear Tom.
"
"If you're reading this,
it probably means I'm dead.
"It might have come
as a shock to you,
"but I'll tell you now.
"I was living on borrowed time.
"My heart went bad a while back.
"I won't bore you
with the details.
"But at this stage of the game,
I'll be lucky if I finish
"this *** letter.
"If it wasn't my ticker
that did me in,
"please tell me I died
after eating 15 pizzas,
"or during sex
with either multiple women
or one really big one.
"
"Either way that works for me.
"But seriously,
I hope I went on the job
"doing the work
I was meant to do
"surrounded by you
and the guys.
"Since it was
mostly about food with me,
"I'm gonna leave you guys
with a recipe.
"Take one self-absorbed
pretty-boy Puerto Rican.
Add one 'long on attitude,
short on experience' black guy.
"
"Then add two morons,
"one more stupid than the other.
"Mix together and let sit.
"Then finally,
add one battle-scarred, haunted,
"formerly drunken
Irish ***,
who screws up his life
like other people breathe.
"
"Blend all ingredients together,
"turn on fire,
and hope for the best.
"Sounds like ***, doesn't it?
"Well, brother, I've tasted it.
"I've eaten it up these last
few years, and it's delicious.
"Okay, cornball, I know.
"But you guys together,
you have something great.
"Me being gone
doesn't change that.
"Find yourself another
good-looking,
"slightly overweight,
spoiler of women,
"and you're back
at full strength.
"Keep the crew together
and keep fighting the fight.
"Don't worry about me, Tom.
I had a good life.
"I knew brotherhood.
"I knew being good
at something.
"I knew what it meant
to have a friend.
"Yeah, we had our ups and downs.
"We're in a major down mode
at the moment, but with you,
"the ups are good enough,
I'll take the downs.
I love you, Tom.
"
"Not in that way.
Okay, maybe a little that way.
"
"I'll always be with you.
Your pal, Lou.
"P.
S.
Don't forget
"what the bagpipers
are supposed to play.
"If you mess up,
I promise I'll haunt you
forever, ***.
"
Anybody else?
Is that?
"In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida,"
yeah.
That's what he wanted.
What?
What the hell was
that?
Just me throwing the
ashes.
I've done this.
Those ain't ashes.
You don't wanna know.
Seriously.
Is that chocolate?
Well, Lou did eat
a lot of chocolate.
Tom.
It's Duncan Hines
Red Velvet Cake Mix.
We had an accident
on the way up.
We had to pad Lou out
a little bit.
Chocolate cake mix
was the best you could do?
Jesus Christ.
What?
Ashes are gray.
I know ashes are gray.
You don't have to tell me.
You don't think I looked for
gray food? There's no gray food.
There's no gray food in that store.
They don't make gray food.
Can? Never mind.
Let's just get the hell
out of here.
Between the heat,
the water and cake mix,
you have a Betty Crocker
of a tidal wave in no time.
Uhh End of the road,
huh, Tom?
Yep.
Yeah.
Not sure what he meant
by "long on attitude,"
but I'm gonna miss Lou.
Hey, pal.
Hey.
Yeah.
I gotta tell you.
Should have gone
with the fluffy yellow
instead of the red velvet.
Big mistake, you know.
Huge mistake.
Really.
It's not a good time?
Yeah.
I got it.
All right.
Hey.
Hey, kid.
All right.
All right.
Let's just
All right, everybody.
Home sweet home.
So, what do you think, uh,
pizza?
Yeah.
Pineapple pizza.
Pineapple?
- Yeah.
It's her new thing.
- Hawaiian-style.
There's a place
that has it down the street.
Damn, what's next,
orange pizza?
They have a citrus one.
Lemon
and lemon-pomegranate.
Pomegranate?
Who the hell's making these
pies, Ricky *** Martin?
I want pepperoni.
Pepperoni!
That's my girl.
Keeping it old-school.
That's why I love you.
Well, I'm starved.
So, what do we have to do?
We call it in,
or we gotta go down and get it?
Tommy?
Yeah, honey, I know.
Extra cheese.
She wants extra cheese.
I don't think they make
a Twizzler pizza yet, hon.
- Gross.
- Tommy?
- Yeah, hon?
- Yeah, I need you
to come in here now please.
Yeah, hon.
I need the number.
Colleen's got it.
What's going on?
Ooh.
You don't want pizza.
I'm having the baby.
O-o-okay, do you think
that you have the strength
to make it down
to the truck?
Tommy, I'm having
the baby now.
Are you sure?
Why don't you lift up
my skirt
and ask the baby
yourself?
Ugh!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Oh, ***!
Oh, ***!
All right! Relax!
You know,
them I can understand.
But you, you're
a firefighter.
Okay?
That's not it, Tom.
It's just that
I'm gonna have to deliver
my wife's mama's baby.
You ain't doing it,
okay.
Because you're gonna pass out
in two seconds.
Everybody shut up!
Okay?
I am not gonna pass out!
This is what I need,
okay?
Colleen, get me a giant
pot of water,
and boil it.
Okay.
You're gonna get me a pair
of scissors.
All right, go.
Katy, get me some towels.
Towels.
While you're
in the bathroom,
my toolbox
is in there.
Get a ball of string
out of it.
Cut off a couple of long pieces
of string.
Put the string
and the scissors
into the boiling water.
Okay, honey, here we go.
Okay, justdown here.
Oh, God.
Hang on.
All right,
is that good? Good?
Move back, okay.
Got it.
Back up.
Further.
Leave the room?
Stay?
Stop talking!
Okay.
Shh! Got it.
Holy ***!
I'm gonna need
a catcher's mitt.
This is happening right now.
Kids, get in here.
Everybody get in here.
Here we go.
- Mom, are you?
- Whoa! ***!
Here we go.
All right, honey.
Just give
me a couple of quick pushes.
Holy ***,
it's coming!
Stop saying "***.
"
Okay, stop saying "***.
"
- Holy ***!
- Here it comes.
Okay, honey.
Here it comes.
Ooh! Tommy!
Here it comes.
Okay, honey.
Here it comes.
Oh, yeah.
A little harder,
honey, okay.
Tommy! Ugh!
Oh, my God! It's deformed!
Deformed!
Wait, wait, wait!
It's okay.
It's just the ***.
Ha, ha.
Yes, it's a ***.
Oh, it's a boy.
Oh, God.
Holy ***.
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
Oh, my God.
It's a boy!
- Oh, show me.
Let me see.
- Okay.
All right.
Ugh.
Yeah! Oh, my God!
It's a boy.
Hi.
There.
We've been waiting for you.
Ah, look at him.
Aww.
Little Lou.
Lou?
What?
Well, you just said "Lou.
"
I guess I was just thinking
because, you know, one guy died
and the other guy
just got here.
Alexander.
What?
Yeah.
Hi, Alexander.
Oh, no, no, honey.
No, no.
No.
Uh
No, Alexander's too faggy.
Phillip then.
Phillip?
***.
Worse than Alexander.
Joshua.
Ugh, Jew ***.
Honey, come on.
Oh, my God, Tommy.
My baby has been here
less than a minute,
and he's already heard
the word "***" three times.
Four.
Our baby.
Our
Me, you.
Yeah.
Our baby.
Oh, Tommy, look at him.
He's so beautiful.
Oh, my God.
And you delivered him.
Oh, my God.
I almost forgot.
I did.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm so proud of you.
- Wow.
- Wow, Dad.
Unbelievable.
You did it, Tom.
Way to go, man.
Oh, Dad, should I got get
the scissors and the string?
Yes.
That's right.
I want you to get
the scissors,
and get
Oh, baby's so sweet.
Get in there.
So cute.
Baby brother.
Ha, ha.
My baby brother.
All right, he's waking up.
Maybe we should get him
some Advil.
What happened?
What do you mean,
what happened, slick?
You couldn't even deliver
your own son
without taking
a carpet dive, man.
Oh, my God.
Oh.
Oh, my God, look at him.
Well, say hello
to your new son,
Shea Gavin.
Wow.
Tommy,
I hate the name Lou.
It sounds old
and like he's a mechanic.
And Ken doesn't work.
But Shea.
I mean, Shea's cool.
Yeah, Shea Gavin.
Kind of sounds
like a singer.
Yeah.
Or a quarterback.
You know what? I'm hungry.
So maybe we should go ahead
and order those pizzas before
the EMTs get here, right?
Yeah.
Hmm.
Hey, Shawn, do me a favor
and don't mention the whole
fainting thing to the guys.
Let's get those pizzas.
He already told them,
didn't he?
Actually,
I called Needles.
Look, Tommy, I really think
you gotta go back to 62 Truck.
I do.
Katy told me what happened
at the playground.
What you said to her
and what she said to you.
Baby, I love you so much.
And I am so happy that we are
still together with this baby.
But if you stick around here
much longer,
I'm gonna kill you.
Got it.
You are staring
at the names of 343 heroes.
Three hundred forty-three
American heroes.
Three hundred forty-three men
who ran in
while the entire world
stood watching and waiting.
First responders
on the front line
of a war
that may never end.
I want you to stare
at these names.
I want you to memorize them.
Go home tonight.
Get on the Internet
and look up these names.
Find out who these men were
and what they did on that day.
And then you'll realize:
This ain't a job.
It ain't an occupation.
It's a calling.
A need.
A desire that you feel
in your bones and your brains
and your nut-sack.
What's so funny,
***?
The The nut-sack thing,
sir.
The what?
The nut-sack thing.
Sir, I
Aaah!
Did I ask you
another question?
Anybody else?
I didn't think so.
I know you ***
have passed
a written test
and you passed
a physical test.
But that don't mean nothing.
Just a bunch
of civil-servant ***!
Because the real test
of whether
you're a chicken *** or not
will come the day
you get to do
what these men behind me did.
Because if you're lucky,
one day soon,
you'll get to run
into a burning building
while everybody else
is running out.
And you'll take the stairs.
Two at a time.
With steel in your eyes
and ice water in your veins.
And you'll come back down
with a civilian
on each shoulder.
And instead of puking
or crying
or *** your pants,
you'll wipe your brow
and run
right the hell back in.
That's the day,
that's the moment
you're gonna find out
if you're a real firefighter
or just one more ***
who bit off
more than he could chew.
Because maybe
one day, you run in
and the guy
you ran in with,
your buddy,
your best friend,
cousin, your brother,
maybe you come out,
but he don't.
Because he got crushed
or incinerated
or burned to a crisp.
And you're gonna ask yourself
why did I walk away,
but not him?
I'll tell you one thing
the answer to that question
is not at the bottom
of a bottle.
You can't drink or fight
or screw your way
to figuring out the answer
to that question.
People die.
We're firefighters.
We die a lot.
I lost my buddy,
my best friend,
my cousin, my brother.
Some people say
it's God's will.
I don't know.
I don't even know
if there is a God.
I hope there is.
Because that would mean one day
all this *** is gonna
make some sense.
That's all I got
for you ***.
I'm gonna turn you over
to one of my brothers right now,
my new commanding officer,
Lt.
Franco Rivera.
Good luck, *** bags.
All right, you scumbags,
listen up and listen good.
These are some names
you are never, ever
gonna wanna forget.
I am going to assign
three names
You know, you're gonna
have to get that fat kid
as a new probie, right?
I mean, none of you ***
can cook.
Looks like the kid
knows his way around food.
You know, you could have
mentioned me by name out there.
You're talking about heroes
and brothers, blah, blah, blah.
Oh, and one more thing,
you know,
when you pick a photo of me
for the plaque
you know,
in the firehouse,
can you find something
that doesn't make me look
so chinny.
You know
Chinny?
Yeah.
Get one from,
you know,
when I was younger
and thinner.
When? When would that be?
Like freshman year
in high school.
Really?
Yeah, I was a buck 10.
Yeah, maybe at birth.
You know, that's no way
to talk to the dead.
But I'm gonna
let it slide
since you named
my godson Shea Gavin.
Pretty cool.
Very cool.
Great name for a restaurant.
Or a quarterback.
I'm gonna go restaurant.
You gonna sit here
staring at me all day,
or we gonna drive
someplace?
Oh, right.
Right.
Yeah.
Duncan Hines
cake mix, huh?
Well, I guess that's kind of
symbolic or ironic.
Not quite sure which.
Anderson, your
three names of remembrance
are Capt.
Ryan Hickey,
Lt.
Timothy Higgins,
and firefighter
Jonathan Hohman.
Black, your three names.
Firefighter Thomas Holohan,
firefighter Joseph Hunter
* I heard a siren
From the docks *
* Saw a train
Set the night on fire *
* I smelled the spring
On the smoky wind *
* Dirty old town *
* Dirty old town *
* I'm gonna make
Me a big sharp axe *
* Shining steel
Tempered in the fire *
* Will chop you down
Like an old dead tree *
* Dirty old town *
* Dirty old town *