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Only one hero can track down Cave Guy.
Only one hero has the heart to fight this fiend.
That hero is...
On another network.
Thus, we have no choice but to turn to...
This fellow.
A teenage nerd, or is he?
MOM: Dexter?
Would you like to watch America's Most Wanted, hun? DEXTER: No thanks, Mom. I'm figuring out
the actuarial tables for my retirement. MOM: Oh, should you dear? You're only sixteen.
DEX: Don't worry Mom.
MOM: But hun, isn't there a dance tonight?
VALERIE: Gee Dexter, I'd love to go to the dance with you.
If I were ugly and dead!
STEPH: Sorry Dex, but I've gotta wash my hair, or help the needy,
I forget which.
JILL: Oh, can't do it Dex.
That's the night I'm, uh,
I'm having something removed. DEX: I don't wanna go.
MOM: You spend far too much time with your computer. It's not healthy. DEX: It's my life.
MOM: That so very very sad.
Ooh, have I ever been chubbier?
This body tight makes me feel so big and wedgy!
*yodeling*
Hello! Aloha
lady in the dress!!!
LORD BRAVERY: All right, all right. What's the problem? MAN: I fell in this hole! I'm trapped!
LB: Fine, hold on, I'll come and get you. What's that smell?
MAN: I think I fell in the sewer!
LB: The sew...OH!
Well, can't you climb out?
MAN: If I could climb out, I wouldn't be yelling help now would I!?
LB: Well you could've at least yelled:
"Help I'm trapped in the sewer!" MAN: What would that have done!?
LB: Saved me a trip. MAN: Do you think you could get me Superman!?
LB: Oh, Superman? What do you need with him? I'm a superhero, aren't I? MAN: I don't know, are you!?
LB: Yes, I told you, I said: "Fear not, Lord Bravery has arrived!" MAN: Oh!? I thought that was a joke. LB: A joke!?
MAN: Yeah, you know, to keep me from focusing on my horrible pain!
LB: Yes, well it's not a joke. MAN: Good. Cause it didn't work!
LB: Look. I'm going to throw a rope down to you. MAN: A rope!?
I thought you were gonna come and get me? LB: From the sewer! MAN: Superman would do it.
LB: Well he's...not...here.
MAN: Could you go get him?
LB: Look, just grab onto the rope and I'll pull you up.
MAN: Or maybe you could get those
turtle fellas with the bandanas. I don't think they'd mind the
stench down here too much.
In fact, I think they'd rather like it.
LB: You are a remarkable twit!
Do you know that? MAN: In fact, I think
those turtles live in the sewers.
LB: Listen! Would you please stop talking and just grab onto the rope, alright!?
MAN: Do you want to call
for Superman, or should I? LB: Oh fine!
And now, a musical interlude!
*Plays "Chopsticks" nonsensically.*
*Plays "Chopsticks" nonsensically.*
This concludes our musical interlude.
We now return to our program.
Steph, you fibbed to Dex about washing your hair.
If this were an afterschool special, you'd pay a bittersweet price for your
little deceit.
Like getting big oily zits
or eating off the same plate as David Lee Roth.
Oh...Eww!
Oh it's the plate and
he's been on it. Don't you under...OH!
Think about it.
I'll be over talking with Jill.
And now, Conversational Norwegian with Freakazoid!
This is the Narwhal.
This is the Narwhal.
Denne er narkval
Hvor Er Narkval
Where is the Narwhal?
Lykkkelig liten narkval
Happy little Narwhal!
This has been Conversational Norwegian with Freakazoid!
Terror. Terror in the night.
The whipping, howling, unforgiving winds crash into the clouds.
And rain falls no matter where you turn. There is no escape,
no escaping the true horror.
A sudden silence.
And then screaming thunder, lighting, floods, tornadoes, famine, pestilence, fire, earthquakes, AAAAHH!!!
Giving way to hazy afternoon sunshine! I'll be back with the five day
forecast after...this.
Hi Jill. I understand you had something removed. Maybe that something was,
YOUR HEART!!!
Just kidding. I'm sure it was a mole or something gross.
JEEPERS: You want to see something strange and mystical?
NOOOO!!!
Get outta here with that watch.Lay off the poor beavers will ya!? Sheesh.
You're a creep.
Go away! We were having a good time until you showed up, Jeepers.
Go have
some coffee with cream or something.
Because I'll tell you something,
this is a happy place.
Hi Mom! And you Valerie.
You...said...
skip it.
I am Mo-Ron! I come with a
important
message for all mankind
And what is that message?
I am Mo-Ron
Do you come in peace or war?
I am
Mo-Ron
What is your purpose here?
I am Mo-Ron
Let me
try something...Tell us, what is 2+2?
Uh, 22! I am Mo-Ron
We can pretty much rule out the wisdom of the Universe.
Then let's blast him!
23?
We interrupt our regularly scheduled program to bring you this special
report from the WB Network.
What exactly is the WB? Can someone tell me this? What's it mean the WB?
The Water Bucket? The Wimpy Boy? The Wet Bananas? I don't know what.
The Weird Butt? What? I'm asking!
This has been a special report from the Weird Butt Network.
We now join Freakazoid already in progress.
Let's learn how to speak French. Because its time for:
Frenching with Freakazoid.
Bonjour classe! Como tale voux? Bon.
Ei matteno di le songe du jour.
Qui a coupe le fromage?
Ju repete.
Qui a coupe le fromage?
Who cut the cheese?
Who cut
the cheese?
Qui a coupe le fromage?
Bon. Merci. Ourvua.
This has been Frenching with Freakazoid.
Hey. Should I sign up for liposuction?
Ha!...........................................Stupid.
Keep em coming Mike.
Expendable Lad, we hardly knew ye.
Hey Mike enough with the bells.
Sorry, I'm giving angels their wings.
Well cut it out and give me another one.
Hey, slow down Mr. F. It's not like Expendable Lad's dead or anything.
He's just in the hospital with a bruised clavicle. FREAKAZOID: I said give me another one.
Curse your tiny paper hat!
If I want to blitz myself into some papaya induced hallucination, that's my
business.
Hello!
Hello!
I'm Fanboy! I'm gonna be your new
sidekick!
Sorry pal, no more sidekicks. I can't stand the guilt.
Or the hotdogs.
This station is conducting a test of the Emergency Broadcasting System.
This is only a test. *Makes a continuous monotone beeping sound*
This concludes our test of the Emergency Broadcasting System. This was only a test.
If there had been in actual emergency, we would have gone like this:
Uh, help! Help us! No! Get us out of here! Help me, help everyone! Aaaaaah!
You were really something tonight.
You were really something tonight.
Dexter and I are different parts of the same whole.
Perhaps Val should learn you can't reject
one without rejecting the other. There, Van Damme and Minnie Pearl!
Freak In!
You're such a funny kidder.
Where'd you come from rodent? Where's the guy with the lightning on his head?
Um...over there!?
Oh, Freak Out!
That was shallow, cheap, and based solely on hormones.
Works for me!