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What you should know about me.
1. I am environmentally conscious and would never
pointlessly waste paper.
2. It hurts my soul,
when a tree is cut down.
3. I don't like noise.
It brings out the worst in me.
4. Today I wanted to dismember
my neighbour with his chainsaw.
He chopped 4 (!!!) trees with it,
which he had mercilessly felled
right in front of my window last week.
5. I hate it when people from outside
can look into my apartment.
Previously, the trees protected me from it.
Now I need a stupid screen.
6. The plan with my neighbour and his chainsaw
I have not dropped it.
7. I bear a grudge.
Whoever has disappointed me deeply,
has spoiled his chances with me forever.
8. I'm good-hearted.
Therefore, I would never be able to
kill my neighbour in reality.
9. I'm a good liar.
Should I do it after all,
I'd easily come up with a credible alibi.
10. My parents got divorced
when I was 6 years old.
11. I have a good relationship with my mother.
She would help me to bury a dead body.
12. I love my mother very much.
Not just because of that.